• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EST 03:29
CET 09:29
KST 17:29
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
TL.net Map Contest #21: Winners10Intel X Team Liquid Seoul event: Showmatches and Meet the Pros10[ASL20] Finals Preview: Arrival13TL.net Map Contest #21: Voting12[ASL20] Ro4 Preview: Descent11
Community News
StarCraft, SC2, HotS, WC3, Returning to Blizzcon!45$5,000+ WardiTV 2025 Championship7[BSL21] RO32 Group Stage4Weekly Cups (Oct 26-Nov 2): Liquid, Clem, Solar win; LAN in Philly2Weekly Cups (Oct 20-26): MaxPax, Clem, Creator win10
StarCraft 2
General
Mech is the composition that needs teleportation t StarCraft, SC2, HotS, WC3, Returning to Blizzcon! RotterdaM "Serral is the GOAT, and it's not close" TL.net Map Contest #21: Winners Weekly Cups (Oct 20-26): MaxPax, Clem, Creator win
Tourneys
Constellation Cup - Main Event - Stellar Fest Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament $5,000+ WardiTV 2025 Championship Merivale 8 Open - LAN - Stellar Fest Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond)
Strategy
Custom Maps
Map Editor closed ?
External Content
Mutation # 499 Chilling Adaptation Mutation # 498 Wheel of Misfortune|Cradle of Death Mutation # 497 Battle Haredened Mutation # 496 Endless Infection
Brood War
General
FlaSh on: Biggest Problem With SnOw's Playstyle [ASL20] Ask the mapmakers — Drop your questions BW General Discussion BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ Where's CardinalAllin/Jukado the mapmaker?
Tourneys
[ASL20] Grand Finals [BSL21] RO32 Group A - Saturday 21:00 CET [Megathread] Daily Proleagues [BSL21] RO32 Group B - Sunday 21:00 CET
Strategy
PvZ map balance Current Meta How to stay on top of macro? Soma's 9 hatch build from ASL Game 2
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Nintendo Switch Thread Path of Exile Should offensive tower rushing be viable in RTS games? Dawn of War IV
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread SPIRED by.ASL Mafia {211640}
Community
General
Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine US Politics Mega-thread The Games Industry And ATVI Russo-Ukrainian War Thread YouTube Thread
Fan Clubs
White-Ra Fan Club The herO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
[Manga] One Piece Anime Discussion Thread Movie Discussion! Korean Music Discussion Series you have seen recently...
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion NBA General Discussion MLB/Baseball 2023 TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
SC2 Client Relocalization [Change SC2 Language] Linksys AE2500 USB WIFI keeps disconnecting Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Learning my new SC2 hotkey…
Hildegard
Coffee x Performance in Espo…
TrAiDoS
Saturation point
Uldridge
DnB/metal remix FFO Mick Go…
ImbaTosS
Reality "theory" prov…
perfectspheres
Our Last Hope in th…
KrillinFromwales
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 1604 users

Anti-Jokes! - Page 4

Forum Index > Closed
Post a Reply
Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 8 9 10 Next All
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
July 01 2011 01:23 GMT
#61
On July 01 2011 08:45 Rorra wrote:
What did the homeless man get for Christmas?

+ Show Spoiler +
Nothing


I understand that in any thread like this theres gonna be repeats but that one was in the bloody OP.

How many newfies does it take to change a light bulb?

+ Show Spoiler +
One, they're actually really good people.
sc4k
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United Kingdom5454 Posts
July 01 2011 01:26 GMT
#62
I love this thread, great jokes

+ Show Spoiler +
Why does Jenny have no friends?
Because she's in a wheelchair


^terrible terrible joke that once made me laugh so hard I threw up
Phaded
Profile Joined August 2010
Australia579 Posts
July 01 2011 01:26 GMT
#63
Why are all foreigners afraid of the Koreans?
+ Show Spoiler +
Because they are good players
I am down but I am far from over
KimJongChill
Profile Joined January 2011
United States6429 Posts
July 01 2011 01:27 GMT
#64
On June 30 2011 22:28 Tobberoth wrote:
I prefer latvian jokes which are of a similar category.

Is dead dog in road. Is dead Latvian in road. What difference?
Dog have fur keep warm. Also, freedom. And dog try eat poop for pleasure not just survive. So many thing!

Three Latvian are brag about sons. “My son is soldier. He have rape as many women as want,” say first Latvian. “Zo?” second say, “My son is farmer. He have all potato he want!” Third Latvian wait long time, then say, “My son is die at birth. For him, struggle is over.” “Wow! You are win us,” say others. But all are feel sad.

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Latvian.
Latvian who?
Please open door. Is cold.

What are one potato say other potato?
Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato?

Man is hungry. He steal bread to feed family. Get home, find all family have sent Siberia! “More bread for me,” man think. But bread have worm.



Haha omg, I loved these jokes so much! It kind of reminds me of the 'In soviet Russia' jokes.
MMA: U realise MMA: Most of my army EgIdra: fuck off MMA: Killed my orbital MMA: LOL MMA: just saying MMA: u werent loss
Epigon
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States54 Posts
July 01 2011 01:32 GMT
#65
OK, this one offends people sometimes. So I'll put it all in spoiler tag.

+ Show Spoiler +
What did the blind, deaf, paraplegic boy get for Christmas?

+ Show Spoiler +
Cancer!
Homework
Profile Joined December 2010
United States283 Posts
July 01 2011 01:38 GMT
#66
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
+ Show Spoiler +
"Where's my tractor?"
obesechicken13
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States10467 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 01:42:58
July 01 2011 01:42 GMT
#67
Ok, this is an original. If your friends are the engineering type who constantly say "that's what she said" *points two fingers to the side and smiles*, then the next time they say something really difficult sounding about the major, say "that's what she said" as if you don't understand the joke and make an awkward chuckle.
I think in our modern age technology has evolved to become more addictive. The things that don't give us pleasure aren't used as much. Work was never meant to be fun, but doing it makes us happier in the long run.
Alicien
Profile Joined March 2011
1 Post
July 01 2011 01:53 GMT
#68
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
+ Show Spoiler +
no idea

What do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs?
+ Show Spoiler +
Still no idea

What do you call a dear with no eyes, no legs, and a cut down its side?
+ Show Spoiler +
Still bloody no idea

Why did the plane crash?
+ Show Spoiler +
Because the pilot was an orange
ilj.psa
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Peru3081 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 02:23:26
July 01 2011 02:16 GMT
#69
why did the chicken crossed the road?
+ Show Spoiler +
to mate or something, chickens don't act rationally
Kamais_Ookin
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Canada4218 Posts
July 01 2011 02:36 GMT
#70
On June 30 2011 22:48 ishboh wrote:
Q: what do you call a black guy that sells drugs?

A:+ Show Spoiler +
a pharmacist


I laughed a lot from this one. Keep it coming guys. :D
I <3 Plexa.
ShatterStorm
Profile Joined October 2010
Australia146 Posts
July 01 2011 02:41 GMT
#71
On June 30 2011 21:57 Papillon wrote:
What's the difference between a bird?

It has two wings, especially the left one.


What is the difference between a duck?

One of its legs are both the same
Do or do not, there is no try
Alkadizar
Profile Joined January 2011
Australia25 Posts
July 01 2011 02:43 GMT
#72
You: Hey ask me if i'm a tree!

Them: Are you a tree?

You: No...
MCeast
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Afghanistan43 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 02:51:19
July 01 2011 02:51 GMT
#73
what kind of bees make milk?
+ Show Spoiler +
boobees
Honor the Honorary Chairman
ShatterStorm
Profile Joined October 2010
Australia146 Posts
July 01 2011 02:51 GMT
#74
On July 01 2011 10:32 Epigon wrote:
OK, this one offends people sometimes. So I'll put it all in spoiler tag.

+ Show Spoiler +
What did the blind, deaf, paraplegic boy get for Christmas?

+ Show Spoiler +
Cancer!



Whats better than winning Gold at the Paralympics for the 100m wheelchair race ?

+ Show Spoiler +
Walking
Do or do not, there is no try
FilmNoir
Profile Joined March 2011
United States44 Posts
July 01 2011 02:54 GMT
#75
Why was six afraid of seven?
+ Show Spoiler +
Numbers are not sentient and therefore incapable of feeling fear.
Khan Fighting!
MadPretty
Profile Joined October 2010
United States101 Posts
July 01 2011 02:57 GMT
#76
Q: How do you kill a red elephant?
A: + Show Spoiler +
With a red elephant gun.


Q: What did the duck put on his head?
A: + Show Spoiler +
Ice


Q: Why did the elephant sit on the marshmellow?
A: + Show Spoiler +
So he wouldn't fall into the hot chocolate
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45022 Posts
July 01 2011 03:00 GMT
#77
Why did the little girl fall off the swing?

+ Show Spoiler +
Because she had no arms.


What do you call a black priest?

+ Show Spoiler +
A priest, you racist!
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
AttackZerg
Profile Blog Joined January 2003
United States7465 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 03:10:49
July 01 2011 03:08 GMT
#78
So the other night I was at a small get together when the women of my dreams walks in. She is thin, with an elegant feline shape, and her eyes are blue and cool as ice cubes.

I watch her mingle with her friends for a few minutes, then I down my drink and walk
+ Show Spoiler +
straight out of the front door to my car. They weren't good dreams.
ComusLoM
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Norway3547 Posts
July 01 2011 03:11 GMT
#79
On June 30 2011 21:33 Blyf wrote:
An Irishman walks past a bar

Oh wow that's the funniest thing I have ever read.
"The White Woman Speaks in Tongues That Are All Lies" - Incontrol; Member #37 of the Chill Fanclub
JunC
Profile Joined August 2010
Canada80 Posts
July 01 2011 03:16 GMT
#80
Is your refridgerator running?

If it is, you better go catch it.
kekekeke
Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 8 9 10 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 32m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft: Brood War
Sea 1284
Zeus 595
PianO 458
Soma 257
JulyZerg 102
Killer 77
soO 36
Sharp 28
Sacsri 13
League of Legends
JimRising 541
Reynor59
Counter-Strike
shoxiejesuss323
Other Games
summit1g19711
WinterStarcraft567
ceh9280
Mew2King224
Hui .116
NeuroSwarm109
Models5
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick771
BasetradeTV7
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 13 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• LUISG 21
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Rush1691
• HappyZerGling278
Upcoming Events
OSC
32m
Wardi Open
3h 32m
Wardi Open
7h 32m
Replay Cast
14h 32m
WardiTV Korean Royale
1d 3h
Replay Cast
2 days
Kung Fu Cup
2 days
Classic vs Solar
herO vs Cure
Reynor vs GuMiho
ByuN vs ShoWTimE
Tenacious Turtle Tussle
2 days
The PondCast
3 days
RSL Revival
3 days
Solar vs Zoun
MaxPax vs Bunny
[ Show More ]
Kung Fu Cup
3 days
WardiTV Korean Royale
3 days
Replay Cast
3 days
RSL Revival
4 days
Classic vs Creator
Cure vs TriGGeR
Kung Fu Cup
4 days
CranKy Ducklings
5 days
RSL Revival
5 days
herO vs Gerald
ByuN vs SHIN
Kung Fu Cup
5 days
BSL 21
5 days
Tarson vs Julia
Doodle vs OldBoy
eOnzErG vs WolFix
StRyKeR vs Aeternum
Sparkling Tuna Cup
6 days
RSL Revival
6 days
Reynor vs sOs
Maru vs Ryung
Kung Fu Cup
6 days
WardiTV Korean Royale
6 days
BSL 21
6 days
JDConan vs Semih
Dragon vs Dienmax
Tech vs NewOcean
TerrOr vs Artosis
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2025-11-07
Stellar Fest: Constellation Cup
Eternal Conflict S1

Ongoing

C-Race Season 1
IPSL Winter 2025-26
KCM Race Survival 2025 Season 4
SOOP Univ League 2025
YSL S2
BSL Season 21
IEM Chengdu 2025
PGL Masters Bucharest 2025
Thunderpick World Champ.
CS Asia Championships 2025
ESL Pro League S22
StarSeries Fall 2025
FISSURE Playground #2
BLAST Open Fall 2025
BLAST Open Fall Qual

Upcoming

SLON Tour Season 2
BSL 21 Non-Korean Championship
Acropolis #4
IPSL Spring 2026
HSC XXVIII
RSL Offline Finals
WardiTV 2025
RSL Revival: Season 3
META Madness #9
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026: Closed Qualifier
eXTREMESLAND 2025
ESL Impact League Season 8
SL Budapest Major 2025
BLAST Rivals Fall 2025
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2025 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.