• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 19:11
CEST 01:11
KST 08:11
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
[ASL20] Ro8 Preview Pt1: Mile High11Team TLMC #5 - Finalists & Open Tournaments2[ASL20] Ro16 Preview Pt2: Turbulence10Classic Games #3: Rogue vs Serral at BlizzCon10[ASL20] Ro16 Preview Pt1: Ascent10
Community News
StarCraft II 5.0.15 PTR Patch Notes189BSL 2025 Warsaw LAN + Legends Showmatch2Weekly Cups (Sept 8-14): herO & MaxPax split cups4WardiTV TL Team Map Contest #5 Tournaments1SC4ALL $6,000 Open LAN in Philadelphia8
StarCraft 2
General
StarCraft II 5.0.15 PTR Patch Notes Why Storm Should NOT Be Nerfed – A Core Part of Pr #1: Maru - Greatest Players of All Time SC4ALL: A North American StarCraft LAN Team TLMC #5 - Finalists & Open Tournaments
Tourneys
RSL: Revival, a new crowdfunded tournament series SC2's Safe House 2 - October 18 & 19 Stellar Fest KSL Week 80 StarCraft Evolution League (SC Evo Biweekly)
Strategy
Custom Maps
External Content
Mutation # 492 Get Out More Mutation # 491 Night Drive Mutation # 490 Masters of Midnight Mutation # 489 Bannable Offense
Brood War
General
[ASL20] Ro8 Preview Pt1: Mile High BW General Discussion BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ ASL ro8 Upper Bracket HYPE VIDEO StarCraft Stellar Forces had bad maps
Tourneys
SC4ALL $1,500 Open Bracket LAN [ASL20] Ro16 Group D BSL 2025 Warsaw LAN + Legends Showmatch [ASL20] Ro16 Group C
Strategy
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Muta micro map competition
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Nintendo Switch Thread Path of Exile Borderlands 3 General RTS Discussion Thread
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion LiquidDota to reintegrate into TL.net
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread The Big Programming Thread Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine Russo-Ukrainian War Thread UK Politics Mega-thread
Fan Clubs
The Happy Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! [Manga] One Piece Anime Discussion Thread
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion MLB/Baseball 2023
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Linksys AE2500 USB WIFI keeps disconnecting Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread High temperatures on bridge(s)
TL Community
BarCraft in Tokyo Japan for ASL Season5 Final The Automated Ban List
Blogs
The Dark Side of South Kore…
Peanutsc
Too Many LANs? Tournament Ov…
TrAiDoS
I <=> 9
KrillinFromwales
A very expensive lesson on ma…
Garnet
hello world
radishsoup
Lemme tell you a thing o…
JoinTheRain
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 2707 users

Anti-Jokes! - Page 4

Forum Index > Closed
Post a Reply
Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 8 9 10 Next All
Bibbit
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada5377 Posts
July 01 2011 01:23 GMT
#61
On July 01 2011 08:45 Rorra wrote:
What did the homeless man get for Christmas?

+ Show Spoiler +
Nothing


I understand that in any thread like this theres gonna be repeats but that one was in the bloody OP.

How many newfies does it take to change a light bulb?

+ Show Spoiler +
One, they're actually really good people.
sc4k
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United Kingdom5454 Posts
July 01 2011 01:26 GMT
#62
I love this thread, great jokes

+ Show Spoiler +
Why does Jenny have no friends?
Because she's in a wheelchair


^terrible terrible joke that once made me laugh so hard I threw up
Phaded
Profile Joined August 2010
Australia579 Posts
July 01 2011 01:26 GMT
#63
Why are all foreigners afraid of the Koreans?
+ Show Spoiler +
Because they are good players
I am down but I am far from over
KimJongChill
Profile Joined January 2011
United States6429 Posts
July 01 2011 01:27 GMT
#64
On June 30 2011 22:28 Tobberoth wrote:
I prefer latvian jokes which are of a similar category.

Is dead dog in road. Is dead Latvian in road. What difference?
Dog have fur keep warm. Also, freedom. And dog try eat poop for pleasure not just survive. So many thing!

Three Latvian are brag about sons. “My son is soldier. He have rape as many women as want,” say first Latvian. “Zo?” second say, “My son is farmer. He have all potato he want!” Third Latvian wait long time, then say, “My son is die at birth. For him, struggle is over.” “Wow! You are win us,” say others. But all are feel sad.

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Latvian.
Latvian who?
Please open door. Is cold.

What are one potato say other potato?
Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato?

Man is hungry. He steal bread to feed family. Get home, find all family have sent Siberia! “More bread for me,” man think. But bread have worm.



Haha omg, I loved these jokes so much! It kind of reminds me of the 'In soviet Russia' jokes.
MMA: U realise MMA: Most of my army EgIdra: fuck off MMA: Killed my orbital MMA: LOL MMA: just saying MMA: u werent loss
Epigon
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States54 Posts
July 01 2011 01:32 GMT
#65
OK, this one offends people sometimes. So I'll put it all in spoiler tag.

+ Show Spoiler +
What did the blind, deaf, paraplegic boy get for Christmas?

+ Show Spoiler +
Cancer!
Homework
Profile Joined December 2010
United States283 Posts
July 01 2011 01:38 GMT
#66
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
+ Show Spoiler +
"Where's my tractor?"
obesechicken13
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States10467 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 01:42:58
July 01 2011 01:42 GMT
#67
Ok, this is an original. If your friends are the engineering type who constantly say "that's what she said" *points two fingers to the side and smiles*, then the next time they say something really difficult sounding about the major, say "that's what she said" as if you don't understand the joke and make an awkward chuckle.
I think in our modern age technology has evolved to become more addictive. The things that don't give us pleasure aren't used as much. Work was never meant to be fun, but doing it makes us happier in the long run.
Alicien
Profile Joined March 2011
1 Post
July 01 2011 01:53 GMT
#68
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
+ Show Spoiler +
no idea

What do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs?
+ Show Spoiler +
Still no idea

What do you call a dear with no eyes, no legs, and a cut down its side?
+ Show Spoiler +
Still bloody no idea

Why did the plane crash?
+ Show Spoiler +
Because the pilot was an orange
ilj.psa
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Peru3081 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 02:23:26
July 01 2011 02:16 GMT
#69
why did the chicken crossed the road?
+ Show Spoiler +
to mate or something, chickens don't act rationally
Kamais_Ookin
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Canada4218 Posts
July 01 2011 02:36 GMT
#70
On June 30 2011 22:48 ishboh wrote:
Q: what do you call a black guy that sells drugs?

A:+ Show Spoiler +
a pharmacist


I laughed a lot from this one. Keep it coming guys. :D
I <3 Plexa.
ShatterStorm
Profile Joined October 2010
Australia146 Posts
July 01 2011 02:41 GMT
#71
On June 30 2011 21:57 Papillon wrote:
What's the difference between a bird?

It has two wings, especially the left one.


What is the difference between a duck?

One of its legs are both the same
Do or do not, there is no try
Alkadizar
Profile Joined January 2011
Australia25 Posts
July 01 2011 02:43 GMT
#72
You: Hey ask me if i'm a tree!

Them: Are you a tree?

You: No...
MCeast
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Afghanistan43 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 02:51:19
July 01 2011 02:51 GMT
#73
what kind of bees make milk?
+ Show Spoiler +
boobees
Honor the Honorary Chairman
ShatterStorm
Profile Joined October 2010
Australia146 Posts
July 01 2011 02:51 GMT
#74
On July 01 2011 10:32 Epigon wrote:
OK, this one offends people sometimes. So I'll put it all in spoiler tag.

+ Show Spoiler +
What did the blind, deaf, paraplegic boy get for Christmas?

+ Show Spoiler +
Cancer!



Whats better than winning Gold at the Paralympics for the 100m wheelchair race ?

+ Show Spoiler +
Walking
Do or do not, there is no try
FilmNoir
Profile Joined March 2011
United States44 Posts
July 01 2011 02:54 GMT
#75
Why was six afraid of seven?
+ Show Spoiler +
Numbers are not sentient and therefore incapable of feeling fear.
Khan Fighting!
MadPretty
Profile Joined October 2010
United States101 Posts
July 01 2011 02:57 GMT
#76
Q: How do you kill a red elephant?
A: + Show Spoiler +
With a red elephant gun.


Q: What did the duck put on his head?
A: + Show Spoiler +
Ice


Q: Why did the elephant sit on the marshmellow?
A: + Show Spoiler +
So he wouldn't fall into the hot chocolate
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44629 Posts
July 01 2011 03:00 GMT
#77
Why did the little girl fall off the swing?

+ Show Spoiler +
Because she had no arms.


What do you call a black priest?

+ Show Spoiler +
A priest, you racist!
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
AttackZerg
Profile Blog Joined January 2003
United States7454 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-07-01 03:10:49
July 01 2011 03:08 GMT
#78
So the other night I was at a small get together when the women of my dreams walks in. She is thin, with an elegant feline shape, and her eyes are blue and cool as ice cubes.

I watch her mingle with her friends for a few minutes, then I down my drink and walk
+ Show Spoiler +
straight out of the front door to my car. They weren't good dreams.
ComusLoM
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Norway3547 Posts
July 01 2011 03:11 GMT
#79
On June 30 2011 21:33 Blyf wrote:
An Irishman walks past a bar

Oh wow that's the funniest thing I have ever read.
"The White Woman Speaks in Tongues That Are All Lies" - Incontrol; Member #37 of the Chill Fanclub
JunC
Profile Joined August 2010
Canada80 Posts
July 01 2011 03:16 GMT
#80
Is your refridgerator running?

If it is, you better go catch it.
kekekeke
Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 8 9 10 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 10h 49m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
NeuroSwarm 153
SpeCial 63
StarCraft: Brood War
Artosis 740
Shuttle 686
Sexy 26
Dota 2
monkeys_forever417
capcasts175
League of Legends
Cuddl3bear5
Counter-Strike
Stewie2K528
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor196
Other Games
summit1g10658
FrodaN5953
Grubby3545
fl0m571
JimRising 413
C9.Mang0229
KnowMe123
Maynarde112
Mew2King55
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick1184
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 15 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• davetesta32
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• FirePhoenix13
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Doublelift5238
Other Games
• imaqtpie1076
• Shiphtur270
Upcoming Events
Afreeca Starleague
10h 49m
Barracks vs Mini
Wardi Open
11h 49m
Monday Night Weeklies
16h 49m
Sparkling Tuna Cup
1d 10h
Afreeca Starleague
1d 10h
Snow vs EffOrt
PiGosaur Monday
2 days
LiuLi Cup
2 days
The PondCast
3 days
CranKy Ducklings
4 days
Maestros of the Game
5 days
Clem vs Reynor
[ Show More ]
[BSL 2025] Weekly
5 days
[BSL 2025] Weekly
5 days
BSL Team Wars
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2025-09-18
Chzzk MurlocKing SC1 vs SC2 Cup #2
HCC Europe

Ongoing

BSL 20 Team Wars
KCM Race Survival 2025 Season 3
BSL 21 Points
ASL Season 20
CSL 2025 AUTUMN (S18)
LASL Season 20
Maestros of the Game
StarSeries Fall 2025
FISSURE Playground #2
BLAST Open Fall 2025
BLAST Open Fall Qual
Esports World Cup 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall Qual
IEM Cologne 2025
FISSURE Playground #1

Upcoming

IPSL Winter 2025-26
SC4ALL: Brood War
BSL 21 Team A
BSL Season 21
Stellar Fest
SC4ALL: StarCraft II
EC S1
ESL Impact League Season 8
SL Budapest Major 2025
BLAST Rivals Fall 2025
IEM Chengdu 2025
PGL Masters Bucharest 2025
Thunderpick World Champ.
CS Asia Championships 2025
ESL Pro League S22
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2025 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.