Jinro Retires From Starcraft 2, Finds a New Game
Following his disappointing loss to his fellow Swede, MorroW, in the TSL Ro32, Johnathan “Jinro” Walsh was distraught. Banelings filled his nightmares every night. Instead of his usual sleep talking, he could only say “SO EXPLOSIVE”. Walking down the street, he'd imagine Banelings blowing up all the buildings around him, but he was helpless to do anything. As soon as he thought it was safe, three more Banelings would show up late and finish everything off. Jinro knew he needed a change, so earlier today he formally announced his retirement from Starcraft 2.
His decision to retire from SC2 was entirely understandable given his brutal defeat at the hands of his countryman and the subsequent trauma he has endured. However, the competitive urge still lingered in the soul of the “Gorilla Terran”. That is why Jinro has decided to become a professional player in another game, Minecraft.
Jinro explained in his announcement earlier:
”Once I made the decision to retire from SC2, I was relieved, but I still wanted to compete professionally in E-sports. I looked at the most popular games out there, and I discovered Minecraft. This game has immense potential. It's the ultimate macro game; all you do is gather resources and build, and eventually you get bored at start attacking everyone else's buildings. This is basically my SC2 style in a nutshell, so Minecraft fits perfectly. The sheer size of the world and its unlimited potential makes it almost impossible to master, unlike SC2, which has been completely figured out by now. And best of all, there's no Banelings in this game.”
Jinro's character in Minecraft
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Download this skin for Minecraft and see it in more detail here. Nothing fancy, feel free to improve it if you like.
Minecraft is still in its beta stage, so Jinro is looking to capitalize early and get as good as he can so when the full game is released, he can be ready to dominate the professional leagues that will surely be starting up.
Update: Jinro was progressing extremely well in Minecraft, until he ran into this deadly monster:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=742yr2el0us
That is a creeper, also known as the Baneling of Minecraft. They're green, and will blow up if you get too close. They can destroy entire buildings and kill you. It appears the creeper attack has caused Jinro to once again regress into his paranoid state as Banelings and now creepers haunt his every waking thought. He now can't say anything but “Sssssssss” and then scream.
Update #2: Infested Archon caught stealing ideas from other TL blogs! No word yet if this blatant plagiarism will cause TL admins to take action.
Note from the Editor
Honestly didn't see that other article on Jinro retiring. I've had this idea for a while and waited until there was a good time to use it. Jinro losing to Morrow and his banelings was perfect. I guess I just should've gotten around to writing this earlier this week. Hopefully you still enjoy this with all the Minecraft parallels. And props to zere for thinking of his post and posting it earlier. Sorry if you think I'm ripping you off or something.
Keep your eyes open for the next IA where I talk about TL in rap battles or discuss how M.C. Escher relates to SC2.
Follow The Infested Archon on twitter for updates and maybe the occasional bad joke: www.twitter.com/InfestedArchon (Watch for some important updates very soon)
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