• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 14:25
CEST 20:25
KST 03:25
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Tournament Spotlight: FEL Cracow 20259Power Rank - Esports World Cup 202577RSL Season 1 - Final Week9[ASL19] Finals Recap: Standing Tall15HomeStory Cup 27 - Info & Preview18
Community News
Google Play ASL (Season 20) Announced25BSL Team Wars - Bonyth, Dewalt, Hawk & Sziky teams10Weekly Cups (July 14-20): Final Check-up0Esports World Cup 2025 - Brackets Revealed19Weekly Cups (July 7-13): Classic continues to roll8
StarCraft 2
General
#1: Maru - Greatest Players of All Time Tournament Spotlight: FEL Cracow 2025 Power Rank - Esports World Cup 2025 I offer completely free coaching services What tournaments are world championships?
Tourneys
FEL Cracov 2025 (July 27) - $10,000 live event Esports World Cup 2025 $25,000 Streamerzone StarCraft Pro Series announced $5,000 WardiTV Summer Championship 2025 WardiTV Mondays
Strategy
How did i lose this ZvP, whats the proper response
Custom Maps
External Content
Mutation #239 Bad Weather Mutation # 483 Kill Bot Wars Mutation # 482 Wheel of Misfortune Mutation # 481 Fear and Lava
Brood War
General
Google Play ASL (Season 20) Announced [Update] ShieldBattery: 2025 Redesign Dewalt's Show Matches in China BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ BW General Discussion
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [BSL20] Non-Korean Championship 4x BSL + 4x China CSL Xiamen International Invitational [CSLPRO] It's CSLAN Season! - Last Chance
Strategy
Simple Questions, Simple Answers [G] Mineral Boosting Does 1 second matter in StarCraft?
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Nintendo Switch Thread Total Annihilation Server - TAForever [MMORPG] Tree of Savior (Successor of Ragnarok) Path of Exile
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread Vanilla Mini Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread UK Politics Mega-thread Stop Killing Games - European Citizens Initiative Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine Russo-Ukrainian War Thread
Fan Clubs
INnoVation Fan Club SKT1 Classic Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Anime Discussion Thread [\m/] Heavy Metal Thread Movie Discussion! [Manga] One Piece Korean Music Discussion
Sports
Formula 1 Discussion 2024 - 2025 Football Thread TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 NBA General Discussion
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Installation of Windows 10 suck at "just a moment" Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
TeamLiquid Team Shirt On Sale The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Ping To Win? Pings And Their…
TrAiDoS
momentary artworks from des…
tankgirl
from making sc maps to makin…
Husyelt
StarCraft improvement
iopq
Socialism Anyone?
GreenHorizons
Eight Anniversary as a TL…
Mizenhauer
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 806 users

[IA] iNcontroL's Announcement Will NOT Cure Cancer

Blogs > Hoju
Post a Reply
1 2 Next All
Hoju
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States449 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-22 02:47:29
February 22 2011 00:54 GMT
#1
[image loading]


iNcontroL's Announcement Will Not Cure Cancer or End World Hunger


For months, Geoff “iNcontroL” Robinson and others have been hyping a big announcement, even using the increasingly popular trend of announcing announcements for an announcement. Earlier today, he finally revealed his announcement after a showmatch between a Gorilla and a Gracken. The announcement is the North American Star League, a 50 player tournament lasting for months and with a $400,000 prize pool over 3 seasons.

People all over the world were disappointed to hear this announcement. Most were expecting a cure for cancer or an end to world hunger. Still others were hoping for the discovery and perfection of cold fusion, eternal world peace, or even something as simple as uniting the world's religions. Sadly, the world will have to settle for the largest Starcraft 2 tournament outside Korea.

[image loading]
This child was sad to hear that he won't be eating tonight because iNcontroL decided to create a tournament rather than end world hunger

With all the hype, many committees were ready to award prizes to iNcontroL such as all of the Nobel Prizes, the U.S. Congressional Medal of Honor, 24 Olympic Gold Medals, and Agnes Thompson Literacy Award from the New Hampshire Coalition of Retired Librarians. But, instead those committees will have to find actual scientists, heroes, athletes, and literate people to give their awards to.

Other people were angry with the showmatch itself. Animal activists were outraged that a gorilla and a Gracken were forced to fight to the death. Activist Sky Panda Wolf Borkowski had this to say, “The Gracken is one of the rarest and most precious creatures we have on Earth. His imbalanced figure, the way he lashes out at others when angry, and how he suddenly runs away from a fight the second he has a disadvantage makes him truly unique. The gorilla, which we have nicknamed “Chinro” for the large tuft of hair on his chin and fondness for the Soju brand, Jinro, is truly one of the most dominant creatures in Korea. It is horrible to see these two beautiful creatures being forced to fight to the death for a prize of $1500. They should get at least get 5 figures.”

On the positive side, it is believed that the tournament will be casted exclusively by everyone's favorite casters, KellyMILKIES and Maven.



[image loading] Follow The Infested Archon on twitter for updates and maybe the occasional bad joke: www.twitter.com/InfestedArchon

[image loading] RSS Feed

+ Show Spoiler [Infested Archon archive] +
+ Show Spoiler [February 2011] +
IdrA to be deported from Korea
GSTL Uneventful, Unexciting, Unintersting
The Infested Archon's Guide to Casting SC2
Day9 Replaced on State of the Game
+ Show Spoiler [January 2011] +
Terran loses in GSL Finals Again
EG makes a big announcement
IdrA announces he's becoming well-mannered
Blizzard releases LAN mode in new SC2 expansion
+ Show Spoiler [December 2010] +
BoxeR to be given a bye to Code S Finals
GomTV announces new details for Code S
MLG purchase $10 million recliner


+ Show Spoiler [Edit] +
Fixed a couple things to make sure the article is as accurate as possible. The Infested Archon prides itself on the truthiness and accuracy of our articles.

Added RSS Feed link


****
www.TheInfestedArchon.com - SC2 Satire
Cano
Profile Joined July 2010
Poland200 Posts
February 22 2011 00:57 GMT
#2
Who's Maven?
MisterD
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Germany1338 Posts
February 22 2011 00:58 GMT
#3
shame on you, incontrol!
Gold isn't everything in life... you need wood, too!
TrueRedemption
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
United States313 Posts
February 22 2011 00:58 GMT
#4
Lot of fun, keep on doing what you do =)
Writer
Suc
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Australia1569 Posts
February 22 2011 00:59 GMT
#5
Hahahaha brilliant article!
Yurie
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
11822 Posts
February 22 2011 01:01 GMT
#6
On February 22 2011 09:54 Hoju wrote:
On the positive side, it is believed that the tournament will be casted exclusively by everyone's favorite casters, KellyMILKIES and Maven.


I think the choice of casters was lacking. Considering that this isn't a serious post and the first of those casters is actually good.
Vishido
Profile Joined January 2011
Canada106 Posts
February 22 2011 01:02 GMT
#7
Haha, aww... poor Gracken :<
moNsi
Profile Joined January 2011
Norway71 Posts
February 22 2011 01:08 GMT
#8
Your my hero, seriously!

Great blog once again!
The solution to world problems is blink stalkers.
SlapMySalami
Profile Joined August 2010
United States1060 Posts
February 22 2011 01:13 GMT
#9
On February 22 2011 10:01 Yurie wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 22 2011 09:54 Hoju wrote:
On the positive side, it is believed that the tournament will be casted exclusively by everyone's favorite casters, KellyMILKIES and Maven.


I think the choice of casters was lacking. Considering that this isn't a serious post and the first of those casters is actually good.


whether shes good or bad you cannot deny a lot of people dislike her at the moment.


marineking will u huk my bigtt1 ilu
Cow
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada1104 Posts
February 22 2011 01:18 GMT
#10
Bwahahah
Amazing as usual
R.I.P. Nujabes ♫
StewKer
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States301 Posts
February 22 2011 01:26 GMT
#11
Incontrol is such a troll for not ending world hunger with that 400,000 dollars. Think of all the mouths he could feed for a year with that money instead of giving us this great entertainment while we eat our Mcdonald's and slurp down our milk shakes?

Anyways good article, made me laugh! :D
HerO Fan! || Coming back to SC2 is like finding an old friend!
KiNGxXx
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
7928 Posts
February 22 2011 01:27 GMT
#12
LOOL That's awesome! Now I have to read all your previous blogs! :D
MKP|Maru|TaeJa|Mvp|Polt|INnoVation|GuMiho|Bomber|GoOdy|TeamTerran
SushilS
Profile Joined November 2010
2115 Posts
February 22 2011 01:27 GMT
#13
Lolrofl as-per-usual...
Lovin the gracken description.
iceiceice: I’m going to make this short; I am the one true tinker player.
TryThis
Profile Joined February 2007
Canada1522 Posts
February 22 2011 01:28 GMT
#14
haha that was a great one!
Dwell
Barbiero
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Brazil5259 Posts
February 22 2011 01:30 GMT
#15
I love the infested archon.

And so fast!
♥ The world needs more hearts! ♥
Hoju
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States449 Posts
February 22 2011 01:32 GMT
#16
On February 22 2011 10:30 Zephirdd wrote:
I love the infested archon.

And so fast!

It's like I knew ahead of time that it was going to be a Starcraft League and wouldn't cure cancer.
www.TheInfestedArchon.com - SC2 Satire
1Eris1
Profile Joined September 2010
United States5797 Posts
February 22 2011 01:36 GMT
#17
Rofl hoju is the best.
Known Aliases: Tyragon, Valeric ~MSL Forever, SKT is truly the Superior KT!
s.a.y
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Croatia3840 Posts
February 22 2011 01:40 GMT
#18
On February 22 2011 09:54 Hoju wrote:


On the positive side, it is believed that the tournament will be casted exclusively by everyone's favorite casters, KellyMILKIES and Maven.


i rofled so much on this.
I am not good with quotes
Barbiero
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Brazil5259 Posts
February 22 2011 01:45 GMT
#19
On February 22 2011 10:32 Hoju wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 22 2011 10:30 Zephirdd wrote:
I love the infested archon.

And so fast!

It's like I knew ahead of time that it was going to be a Starcraft League and wouldn't cure cancer.


Touchè.
♥ The world needs more hearts! ♥
29 fps
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States5724 Posts
February 22 2011 02:16 GMT
#20
it COULD cure cancer if the winners donate that money to cancer research.
4v4 is a battle of who has the better computer.
1 2 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
BSL20 Non-Korean Champi…
18:00
RO8 Round Robin Group - Day 4
Bonyth vs Zhanhun
Dewalt vs Mihu
Hawk vs Sziky
Sziky vs QiaoGege
Mihu vs Hawk
Zhanhun vs Dewalt
Fengzi vs Bonyth
ZZZero.O101
LiquipediaDiscussion
FEL
09:00
Cracow 2025
Clem vs TBD
Reynor vs TBD
RotterdaM2629
ComeBackTV 2243
IndyStarCraft 716
WardiTV537
CranKy Ducklings222
3DClanTV 170
Rex140
EnkiAlexander 120
LiquipediaDiscussion
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
RotterdaM 2629
IndyStarCraft 716
Rex 140
Vindicta 54
MindelVK 15
StarCraft: Brood War
Britney 31256
Shine 315
firebathero 258
BeSt 186
Soulkey 131
ZZZero.O 101
Hyun 64
Dewaltoss 63
yabsab 35
sSak 30
[ Show more ]
Free 25
Terrorterran 7
IntoTheRainbow 4
Dota 2
Gorgc6508
qojqva4037
Counter-Strike
fl0m3847
flusha181
Super Smash Bros
hungrybox1274
Mew2King524
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor715
Liquid`Hasu474
Other Games
B2W.Neo865
Hui .201
KnowMe136
Organizations
Other Games
gamesdonequick2284
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 18 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• StrangeGG 45
• iHatsuTV 11
• Legendk 8
• Kozan
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• sooper7s
• intothetv
• Migwel
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
StarCraft: Brood War
• Azhi_Dahaki14
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
• BSLYoutube
Dota 2
• Nemesis2371
• WagamamaTV747
Other Games
• imaqtpie1050
• Shiphtur226
Upcoming Events
Wardi Open
16h 36m
Sparkling Tuna Cup
1d 15h
WardiTV European League
1d 21h
Online Event
1d 23h
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
2 days
The PondCast
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
Korean StarCraft League
5 days
CranKy Ducklings
5 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

CSLPRO Last Chance 2025
Esports World Cup 2025
Murky Cup #2

Ongoing

Copa Latinoamericana 4
Jiahua Invitational
BSL 20 Non-Korean Championship
BSL 20 Team Wars
FEL Cracov 2025
CC Div. A S7
Underdog Cup #2
IEM Cologne 2025
FISSURE Playground #1
BLAST.tv Austin Major 2025
ESL Impact League Season 7
IEM Dallas 2025
PGL Astana 2025
Asian Champions League '25

Upcoming

ASL Season 20: Qualifier #1
ASL Season 20: Qualifier #2
ASL Season 20
CSLPRO Chat StarLAN 3
BSL Season 21
RSL Revival: Season 2
Maestros of the Game
SEL Season 2 Championship
WardiTV Summer 2025
uThermal 2v2 Main Event
HCC Europe
ESL Pro League S22
StarSeries Fall 2025
FISSURE Playground #2
BLAST Open Fall 2025
BLAST Open Fall Qual
Esports World Cup 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall Qual
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2025 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.