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Well, if you only "sometimes" watch porn, how hard can it be never to watch it?
I can understand where she's coming from saying it's cheating on her. My last girlfriend was bisexual and asked me on several occassions if she could make out with another girl (sometimes right in front of me). If I had heard this from another person I probably would have shouted JACKPOT, but since I was emotionally involved with her I thought of it differently. Here's this girl I'm in love with who is just as attracted to girls as I am. So then, what's the difference between her kissing another girl and me kissing another girl? It never felt right, I told her about my issues with it several times and I finally found a solution in telling her that if she wants to kiss another girl it was ok for me to kiss her too!
Some people take it a step further than me. Maybe she's concerned watching and fapping can turn into a gateway drug for cheating? Maybe she thinks your fantasies are a kind of emotional unfaithfulness? Whatever the case, it probably doesn't feel right to her. There's definitely another talk or two needed on the subject, but if your sex life is already going well what's the harm in letting it go?
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On January 13 2011 04:14 Megaliskuu wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:12 AyeH wrote:On January 13 2011 04:09 Megaliskuu wrote: Just watch when you want, but tell her you don't watch anymore. EZ i'm not going to lie to her about it, if she catches me, i'll just get in more shit. Does she check your internet history? O_O
use that google browser! it's like google stalker or something, where you can browse without putting anything on your history :D
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On January 13 2011 04:14 Megaliskuu wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:12 AyeH wrote:On January 13 2011 04:09 Megaliskuu wrote: Just watch when you want, but tell her you don't watch anymore. EZ i'm not going to lie to her about it, if she catches me, i'll just get in more shit. Does she check your internet history? O_O Look, there is another ways a woman can use to know if a guy watched porn or not.
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On January 13 2011 04:14 Megaliskuu wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:12 AyeH wrote:On January 13 2011 04:09 Megaliskuu wrote: Just watch when you want, but tell her you don't watch anymore. EZ i'm not going to lie to her about it, if she catches me, i'll just get in more shit. Does she check your internet history? O_O
Obviously, the OP needs Firefox or Chrome with "porn-mode".
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On January 13 2011 04:16 Jugan wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:14 Megaliskuu wrote:On January 13 2011 04:12 AyeH wrote:On January 13 2011 04:09 Megaliskuu wrote: Just watch when you want, but tell her you don't watch anymore. EZ i'm not going to lie to her about it, if she catches me, i'll just get in more shit. Does she check your internet history? O_O use that google browser! it's like google stalker or something, where you can browse without putting anything on your history :D
she doesn't check my history. she doesn't live with me either. she's just so naive when it comes to guys and their porn..
edit: and yes, it's called google incgonito (cool name) and i do use it. lol
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why don't you try being a gentlemen, treating your woman with respect and honesty, and utilizing some self control. these qualities are all sorely lacking in modern man.
sitting at a computer isn't even comparable to the experiences, emotions, and energy you can feel with a partner
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Ur silly, bro.
How lucky are you to have a gf?!?!?!?! Real people are better than moving images!
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Honestly, tell her that's the way you operate, and if she REALLY can't handle it, then leave. Best case scenario is of course, that she watches with you.
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Why did you tell her that you watch porn ? I mean how the hell do you even work that into the conversation o_O
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On January 13 2011 04:25 Titusmaster6 wrote: Honestly, tell her that's the way you operate, and if she REALLY can't handle it, then leave. Best case scenario is of course, that she watches with you.
I can't imagine what priorities you have in your head that you would leave your girlfriend because she doesn't let you watch porn.
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On January 13 2011 04:22 nimrodel wrote: why don't you try being a gentlemen, treating your woman with respect and honesty, and utilizing some self control. these qualities are all sorely lacking in modern man.
sitting at a computer isn't even comparable to the experiences, emotions, and energy you can feel with a partner
i realize that and we have plenty of sex. but idk if you've been with the same women for many months but it can get boring. i can be a gentlemen, treat my gf with respect and honesty, have self control, and still watch porn, right? if you think you have to not watch porn to be a gentlemen, that is ludicrous. i have self control (i stopped watching porn for 8 months straight because she asked me to not watch it) and the only reason i started to again was because things were starting to get a little boring.
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On January 13 2011 04:27 Zerokaiser wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:25 Titusmaster6 wrote: Honestly, tell her that's the way you operate, and if she REALLY can't handle it, then leave. Best case scenario is of course, that she watches with you. I can't imagine what priorities you have in your head that you would leave your girlfriend because she doesn't let you watch porn.
i would definitely not leave her because she doesn't approve. she emotionally cheated on me with one of her ex boyfriends and i could've easily left her right then. i didn't though because i was willing to accept her mistake. but if she can't even accept this little thing from me, idk...
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I love that site.
BTW, if your GF can't handle you jerking it and potentially fantasizing about situations other than you and her, then:
A. She's way too controlling and jealous and/or B. She's not comfortable/in denial with human sexuality
What? She's never fantasized about anyone other than you? Gimme a break.
If she can't understand this then get a smarter GF.
On January 13 2011 04:27 DorF wrote: Why did you tell her that you watch porn ? I mean how the hell do you even work that into the conversation o_O Is it really that hard? I end up talking about porn w/ girls all the time, sex is fun to talk about.
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On January 13 2011 04:22 nimrodel wrote: why don't you try being a gentlemen, treating your woman with respect and honesty, and utilizing some self control. these qualities are all sorely lacking in modern man.
sitting at a computer isn't even comparable to the experiences, emotions, and energy you can feel with a partner
I think you're on the wrong forum. The women's network forum is that away ----> link
Also to claim that sitting at comp is not comparable to real experiences is completely irrelevant to the OP's question or the topic.
Also he should be a gentleman not a gentlemen. Unless he's into role playing. Then he could pretend that he's a group of guys and act out a bukkake with his gf. Who knows.
Anyways thanks for the shit post nimrodel. lol
What you *really* should do is find out why it is bothering her, (most likely some sort of insecurity or lack of confidence in the relationship), and address the root of the issue head-on. You could also try watching together. Either way just be open and honest about it, figure out why she has negative feelings towards it, and fix it. Obviously watching porn from time to time is not something a girlfriend can legitimately hold against you, (unless theres some cultural or religious factors which I am unaware of), so you'll figure it out dude. Communicate ^^
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On January 13 2011 04:30 sob3k wrote: I love that site.
BTW, if your GF can't handle you jerking it and potentially fantasizing about situations other than you and her, then:
A. She's way too controlling and jealous and/or B. She's not comfortable/in denial with human sexuality
What? She's never fantasized about anyone other than you? Gimme a break.
If she can't understand this then get a smarter GF.
I think that site has one of the best looking girls...
And she says she has fantasized about matt damon before and i'm sure there are others. she thinks that because it is in her head, it's better than me going on the internet and watching it. i don't understand her at all..
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On January 13 2011 04:31 Reason.SC2 wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:22 nimrodel wrote: why don't you try being a gentlemen, treating your woman with respect and honesty, and utilizing some self control. these qualities are all sorely lacking in modern man.
sitting at a computer isn't even comparable to the experiences, emotions, and energy you can feel with a partner I think you're on the wrong forum. The women's network forum is that away ----> linkAlso to claim that sitting at comp is not comparable to real experiences is completely irrelevant to the OP's question or the topic. Also he should be a gentlem an not a gentlem en. Unless he's into role playing. Then he could pretend that he's a group of guys and act out a bukkake with his gf. Who knows. Anyways thanks for the shit post nimrodel. lol What you *really* should do is find out why it is bothering her, (most likely some sort of insecurity or lack of confidence in the relationship), and address the root of the issue head-on. You could also try watching together. Either way just be open and honest about it, figure out why she has negative feelings towards it, and fix it. Obviously watching porn from time to time is not something a girlfriend can legitimately hold against you, (unless theres some cultural or religious factors which I am unaware of), so you'll figure it out dude. Communicate ^^
she does have issues with self confidence and her own appearance. and no matter how hard or often i tell her it is ok, she is never pleased with herself. she doesn't work hard to fix her own problem either though. like i said before, we communicate a lot, thus why this subject was brought about between us. she thinks porn is brutal, heinous, vile, disgusting, rough, and every bad word in the dictionary. it's just really naive of her to think that way..
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I'd suggest the same thing as others - watch some porn together. Well, I guess diving into hardcore porn right away is kind of a bad idea, but certainly romance movies with plenty of sex scenes are good for starters.
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I'm not sure who would agree with me here But if she's that upset over you viewing pornography, it's her job to keep you relatively satisfied to the point where you don't have to watch porn.
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On January 13 2011 04:33 AyeH wrote:Show nested quote +On January 13 2011 04:30 sob3k wrote: I love that site.
BTW, if your GF can't handle you jerking it and potentially fantasizing about situations other than you and her, then:
A. She's way too controlling and jealous and/or B. She's not comfortable/in denial with human sexuality
What? She's never fantasized about anyone other than you? Gimme a break.
If she can't understand this then get a smarter GF.
I think that site has one of the best looking girls... And she says she has fantasized about matt damon before and i'm sure there are others. she thinks that because it is in her head, it's better than me going on the internet and watching it. i don't understand her at all..
So just ask her to explain why that's different. If she breaks down and ends up saying "it just is" or something similar, then tell her she's going to have to explain/figure out the situation better because she isn't being reasonable or making sense. Just keep on putting the burden of explanation on her. If she comes up with some sort of reasonable argument, then you can discuss. If she can't, then just keep asking her to explain why she feels this way. Eventually she will realize she is in the wrong or she won't be able to handle it and will probably run away. People can't handle cognitive dissonance for extended periods.
If she thinks porn is terrible then you have to ask her why and make her actually think about it, because it sounds like she isn't going to do it by herself.
I worked as a swim instructor for a long time and its the same way you get small children over their fear of diving and other skills. You actually engage them in a discussion of why/what they are afraid of, and talk about whether or not it makes sense. Use tons on analogies they understand. Of course they will still be afraid even after they admit to you that their fears are illogical, but if you keep the repetition up the brain eventually internalizes the more reasonable attitudes.
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On January 13 2011 04:01 oBlade wrote: It's also possible to watch porn together. Yeah but it's such a pain to find porn that the gf will like.
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