|
I don't think bullying had anything to do with her suicide.
She probably has just had a lot of emotional and mental issues and knew that by posting a youtube video before killing herself it would give her a ton of post death attention and celebrity and it looks like it worked.
Kids have been bullied for tens of thousands of years, the recent moral panic and anti-bullying hysteria isn't going to help because that's not the real problem.
There's an explosion of depression and mental illness in the modern world but it has nothing to do with bullying.
|
On October 13 2012 05:19 Thehealbus wrote: Everything that happened was her fault, she constantly made poor decisions which led to the bullying, and she was unable to distance herself from the hate. She should have been apathetic to it instead of letting it get to her that much. I think the concept of cyber-bullying is silly in the first place, it's extremely easy to avoid and ignore, unless you purposely get yourself involved in it.
Her parents should have raised her better to make better decisions and respond to harassment better.
I don't think the harassers should be punished, high school is a harsh world, she put herself in these situations.
so the bullying was okay due to her decisions/mistakes she made? that's like saying someone who got raped deserved it because she was hot and not being careful in a club which lead to someone spiking her drink and eventually raping her.
distance herself from the hate? she tried, she moved through two different schools. but the hate followed her, what was she to do? how does she distance herself from a mob of people kicking the crap out of her?
damn man, why don't you just go piss on her grave...
|
On October 13 2012 05:06 Bobgrimly wrote: Simple rules for life. NEVER FLASH ONLINE. NEVER FLASH UNLESS YOU ARE HAPPY FOR THE WORLD TO SEE. Should be taught in schools as basic 101 internet and phone usage.
Also as a side note.... don't be a whore. Respect relationships and demand that anyone you partner with does too. Don't think you are cool cheating on someone or helping someone cheat. You are just a whore.
Her life could have been a lot easier and better (she wasn't ugly) if she hadn't been a bit of a whore. Its hard to sympathize with her when she did all that willingly. That's what started it all... she willingly fucked up her life. Maybe unknowingly cause she was a bimbo with no clue but that's like a moth to the flame. Maybe her parents should have taught her not to be a whore.
I will drill the above lessons into any kids I ever have simply because then they can make their own choices. And its not like this is new ground. This has been the rule since phones started taking pictures or webcams became remotely common (the last ten years).
DO NOT BE A WHORE. Sucks that kids are horrible. Don't give them easy reasons to hate you. Tell your kids!
What a fucking joke. Don't be a whore? Excuse me, she wasn't in a relationship. The guy was. She owed nothing to the other side. If I'm hitting on a girl with a boyfriend and she sleeps with me - who's done worse? Me, the person who has cheated on no one, or the girl, who has also done the equal act of sleeping with someone but is committed not to do so.
Ridiculous. Insinuating that flashing online somehow means it's thus available for everyone to see (which yes, it is, and that's a consequence) is deserved is ridiculous. Especially, because you know, it was illegal for him to do so.
I don't know why I'm getting so riled by this topic - probably because I'm always on the super conservative end of discussions and all the "what happened to caring about other people instead of keeping your money" debates. The lack of sympathy is utterly appalling to me to someone who is a clear victim in this situation.
On October 13 2012 05:23 Zaqwert wrote: I don't think bullying had anything to do with her suicide.
She probably has just had a lot of emotional and mental issues and knew that by posting a youtube video before killing herself it would give her a ton of post death attention and celebrity and it looks like it worked.
Kids have been bullied for tens of thousands of years, the recent moral panic and anti-bullying hysteria isn't going to help because that's not the real problem.
There's an explosion of depression and mental illness in the modern world but it has nothing to do with bullying.
Kids have been committing suicide for ages as well. It's just information spreads 30000x faster now, not to mention the fact images can be recorded and redistributed.
|
I think it's an insult to her and her family for a bunch of journalists to run around pretending to be police investigators and talk about why she killed herself, as if they have a fucking clue. It's a tragedy, leave it at that.
|
Normally I dont really sympathize when it comes to stupid people doing stupid things (come on, lets be a bit honest), but then I also remember that I too have a sister at her age that might end up making the same mistakes this girl did one day despite what anyone else tries to teach her (without being completely invasive). On the one hand, I'd probably still criticize my sister as hard, if not harder, than anyone else who gets into these types of situations-- but the sting from doing so would definitely be there this time.
All in all, I think putting a face on a story like this can really cloud people's judgement about the issue, IMAGINE it was a different face:
15 year old white guy with the same problems/mistakes (posted his junk online, bad relationship, got bullied then suicide)
This kid would get a lot less sympathy because all of a sudden its all "what a whimp, this kid should've manned the fuck up/not been such a dumb loser to make these mistakes". I think on the other hand, I'd still be consistent about the issue and treat it all the same (or similar enough). The bullying is bad, yes, but at the same time people have to learn to grow some skin regardless of gender/situation. It feels like, for the most part, people are giving this girl a free pass for somehow being "emotionally disturbed" when really she's just a teenager.
|
wow. people in this thread. "her own faul" and calling her a whore. God..whats more sad then her story is the people here actually pretending to be decent humen beings.
|
On October 13 2012 05:19 m1rk3 wrote: It only pains me to say that no one is actually going to do anything. There will be a bunch of people saying "The bullying needs to stop!" What does this achieve? Awareness, not really. Doubt bullies watch the news. Someone actually has to go to the source. Talking may be doing but it's not the kind of action that will "stop" bullying. Talking helps. Talking always helps. If it brings awareness to parents, or sways a few kids out of bullying because they can finally understand the victims perspective, then it has made a real difference. Of course action is important too, but talking and public discourse in general are more powerful than people give it credit for.
|
I guess i really don't get why she killed herself. Maybe its just the difference in our personalities. If people were treating me like that i would absolutely hate them.
So if they (the people i hate) were literally telling me to kill myself, i would have a even stronger will to live, just to spite them.
Sad story, she didn't deserve that. despite the mistakes she made.
|
On October 13 2012 05:24 FabledIntegral wrote:
What a fucking joke. Don't be a whore? Excuse me, she wasn't in a relationship. The guy was. She owed nothing to the other side. If I'm hitting on a girl with a boyfriend and she sleeps with me - who's done worse? Me, the person who has cheated on no one, or the girl, who has also done the equal act of sleeping with someone but is committed not to do so.
Ridiculous. Insinuating that flashing online somehow means it's thus available for everyone to see (which yes, it is, and that's a consequence) is deserved is ridiculous. Especially, because you know, it was illegal for him to do so.
You did worse knowingly convincing her to sleep with you. You are a horrible person. If you know she has a boyfriend you should tell her how you feel then let her choose but not be a fucking dick and try and convince her to cheat.
Its people (whores) like yourself that make this world a worse place. Stop it. Just stop. Be straight up and honest if you like someone and let them choose. Then if they leave the person they are with you have every moral ground to stand on. But if you are just after a quick fuck and want to ruin relationships then FUCK YOU. People like you are the problem thinking you are innocent when you are causing horrible problems. Starts with relationships and then as you age you start ruining marriages that might have kids. Congratulations on justifying your actions because you weren't the one married so their fucked up kids because of the situation you create aren't your problem.
JUST STOP BEING WHORES PLEASE! Grow up and grow some respect for relationships. It will make everything healthier and happier.
|
On October 13 2012 05:02 NEEDZMOAR wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 04:34 SheaR619 wrote:On October 13 2012 04:20 AllHailTheDead wrote: the loss of life is sad and all but......I think this girl is just stupid.....
let me show my boobs to people on the internet(herp derp) let me give this guy a show so he can make a video(herp derp) let me go over to this guys house who told me his girlfriend is on vacation(and then she acts like it was his fault "he hooked up with me" no sounds like your just an attention whore......)
also sounds like she has no respect for other people and doesnt give a shit
no smart girl would go have sex with a guy when they have a girlfriend obviously they dont care about you
and if I was the other girl I would prob beat her up at school also for being a hoe ^ This. She did alot of stupid shit and I guess you can say she kinda got what she deserved but she wasnt mentally well after that boob flash which triggered everything. I know using the "mentally unwell" is probably just an excuse but it a possibility to consider. Either way, it quiet sad to see that she had to endure such hardship and no one deserve such but it sadly is all trigger by her action. Im not sure if I should laugh because of the imaturity, stupidity and the judgment int his post from some teenager who isnt fully grown up yet (a lot of people never gets pass the arrogant attitude that teenagers sport) Or cry because of the bullshit in this post... The part about mentally unwell makes me so angry with you that I would want to physically hurt you.
I dont get it? Why are you angry with me? She IS mentally unwell/unstable or sick or w/e. Why are you being mad at me for stating that fact? She admit to drug, cutting, anxiety issues and claimed to be diagnosed with deep depression.
Sure the stuff that happen to her is sad but can you truly admit that it wasnt HER fault? I understand that teenager are easily influenced by stuff but she Flash her boobs triggered her depression, anxiety and drugs. Then she hooked up with a guy who she already knew had a girlfriend and yet she just figures that she would sleep with him and nothing will happen. She probably hooked up with the guy due to her depression and was looking for comfort but even if the guy return his love for her and they become a couple, do you seriously think that the girlfriend that got dumped would stop there? The girlfriend would probably beat the living hell out of her even more and her life would be even more hell and she would be called the newest slut in school for stealing boyfriend. Her life does suck more then others and she probably got what she deserved for making the wrong choice but not to this extent. Even this amount of bullying is pretty horrendous.
So are you saying that what I said about her being "mentally unwell" is not a fact after she admited to being diagnosed with depression, is suicidal, on drugs, cutting and anxiety disorder? I do not see what I said has been bullshit, please correct me where I am wrong.
|
On October 13 2012 04:13 Fallians wrote: Killing yourself is never the answer to this, despite how bad this girl had it taking her own life was absolutely stupid, juvenile and selfish.
I kind of have to agree with this. Those cards and the video made her look like some attention whore to me =.=
|
Why choose suicide? there are many options out there, that would help you!
This saddens me...suicides happens in the military also. Hazing and stress can make you think about it.
|
On October 13 2012 05:30 SheaR619 wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 05:02 NEEDZMOAR wrote:On October 13 2012 04:34 SheaR619 wrote:On October 13 2012 04:20 AllHailTheDead wrote: the loss of life is sad and all but......I think this girl is just stupid.....
let me show my boobs to people on the internet(herp derp) let me give this guy a show so he can make a video(herp derp) let me go over to this guys house who told me his girlfriend is on vacation(and then she acts like it was his fault "he hooked up with me" no sounds like your just an attention whore......)
also sounds like she has no respect for other people and doesnt give a shit
no smart girl would go have sex with a guy when they have a girlfriend obviously they dont care about you
and if I was the other girl I would prob beat her up at school also for being a hoe ^ This. She did alot of stupid shit and I guess you can say she kinda got what she deserved but she wasnt mentally well after that boob flash which triggered everything. I know using the "mentally unwell" is probably just an excuse but it a possibility to consider. Either way, it quiet sad to see that she had to endure such hardship and no one deserve such but it sadly is all trigger by her action. Im not sure if I should laugh because of the imaturity, stupidity and the judgment int his post from some teenager who isnt fully grown up yet (a lot of people never gets pass the arrogant attitude that teenagers sport) Or cry because of the bullshit in this post... The part about mentally unwell makes me so angry with you that I would want to physically hurt you. I dont get it? Why are you angry with me? She IS mentally unwell/unstable or sick or w/e. Why are you being mad at me for stating that fact? She admit to drug, cutting, anxiety issues and claimed to be diagnosed with deep depression. Sure the stuff that happen to her is sad but can you truly admit that it wasnt HER fault? I understand that teenager are easily influenced by stuff but she Flash her boobs triggered her depression, anxiety and drugs. Then she hooked up with a guy who she already knew had a girlfriend and yet she just figures that she would sleep with him and nothing will happen. She probably hooked up with the guy due to her depression and was looking for comfort but even if the guy return his love for her and they become a couple, do you seriously think that the girlfriend that got dumped would stop there? The girlfriend would probably beat the living hell out of her even more and her life would be even more hell and she would be called the newest slut in school for stealing boyfriend. Her life does suck more then others and she probably got what she deserved for making the wrong choice but not to this extent. Even this amount of bullying is pretty horrendous. So are you saying that what I said about her being "mentally unwell" is not a fact after she admited to being diagnosed with depression, is suicidal, on drugs, cutting and anxiety disorder? I do not see what I said has been bullshit, please correct me where I am wrong.
Im mad at you because u talk of mentally unstable as an "execuse" as if it wasnt a valid reason for her ractions.
|
On October 13 2012 04:22 [UoN]Sentinel wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 04:15 Disposition1989 wrote:On October 13 2012 04:09 killa_robot wrote: Interesting they didn't mention 4chan at all.
If I'm not mistaken, I recall others saying their was a thread involving said girl the other day.
Though it could have just been them discussing the video I suppose. http://imgur.com/p7todThis was on /r/4chan, not sure if there was anything else. Too scared to go on real 4chan hehe Hot damn it was worse than I thought based on this photo. This makes my school look like the happiest, most tolerant community on Earth in comparison. These kids need help. I still stand neutrally on Amanda's death however.
What do you mean you stand neutrally?
|
On October 13 2012 05:23 NEEDZMOAR wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 05:18 dannystarcraft wrote:On October 13 2012 05:05 Fumanchu wrote:On October 13 2012 04:58 FabledIntegral wrote:On October 13 2012 04:53 Fumanchu wrote:On October 13 2012 04:31 NEEDZMOAR wrote: I hate bullies... one day in highschool me and a couple of friends decided to beat the shit out of the bullies at our school... I can still very clearly remember the sound of their skulls hitting the wall very hard...shit felt good.
People make mistakes, we have no idea what pushed her into it. Calling her stupid is... well.. stupid, you have no insight in her mind, her thoughts, why she did what she did, how desperately she was looking for respect and friends, warmth and social contact. We have no idea how her life was, yet somehow, so many people think they have a right to judge her.... hows is THAT not fucked up???
To people who share "allhailthedeads" opinion about this, get the f*ck out of here. You have no idea about anything, show some empathy and try to squeeze your fat ass into somebody elses pair of trousers...
....You disgust me. Uh... so you and your friends hated bullies, and you're solution was to "bully the bullies"? And then you felt good about it. And now you're mad at people judging her without knowing her situation in full, yet you feel fine to judge allhailthedead's comments without knowing him in full. Do you see any inconsistency with what you're posting? On topic, I think it's heartbreaking that she thought that suicide was the best option. You would think that her previous actions would have had people close to her reach out and try to help. There is definitely a difference. For example, I once was witnessing a bully constantly pick on a mentally handicapped kid that kept yelling at him "leave me alone." The bully wouldn't leave him alone. I walked up to the bully, shoved him against the locker, picked him up off the ground, and told him that if I ever saw him do that again I would beat the shit out of him. It felt good, I did not feel like a bully, and I have no regrets. In fact, I'm glad I did it. There's also a difference between your stories. In your story you're intervening between a bully and his target. When he refused to back down, you increased measures until he understood you were serious. In my opinion that's a justifiable action, and one to be proud of. However in the other story, it sounded like one day a group of individuals decided that they were going to go around school and beat up all the bullies. To me this seems stupid and just as wrong as the actions a bully takes. Agreed. There is a definite difference between the two stories. On October 13 2012 04:31 NEEDZMOAR wrote: I hate bullies... one day in highschool me and a couple of friends decided to beat the shit out of the bullies at our school... I can still very clearly remember the sound of their skulls hitting the wall very hard...shit felt good.
Honestly, this is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard. So now you are a bully. Great job. Hope you are proud. On topic. It is sad that things come to this. I remember anything bad seeming disproportionately awful in middle/high school. It is important to know how to deal with mistakes once you make them (because we all do). I just am so sad that she took her life... I dont consider myself a bully, I took a stand against injustice, me and my friends accomplished something no adults (or words for that matter) could ever accomplish, I stood up for those who needed it, I'll ask you the same thing I asked the other guy; can u say that u did the same thing? or were u one of those who sat there in silence while people were bullied an dmistreated? Im sorry, I cant stand that kind of apathy,
I was one of those who was bullied (things got better as school went on though... so I am not complaining). And I didn't have a group of "friends" to help me go around and beat up all the bullies. I wasn't physically able to stop bullying (not saying I stayed silent about it though). What you described draws some parallels to "mob mentality" which I would consider to be... well bad.
I'm glad you want to take a stand against injustice, and I am glad there are people like you to stick up for the little guys. The idea of what you did (preventing bullying) is great, but I think the "mobish" type of way that you went about it in this specific instance was wrong.
|
I didn't know flashing your boobs makes you deserving of ridicule and harassment for the rest of your life.
|
Incredibly sad....
What's even worse is the responses here, she didn't deserve it. Young people make stupid decisions, Hell I bet 95% of the people here who are over 25 recognise they made some really fucking stupid decisions in their teenage years. She was harassed so badly the only way out she could see was to kill herself. Imagine for a second that was your sister or daughter..... so sad. My thoughts go out to her family, they must be in pieces right now.
|
On October 13 2012 05:05 FabledIntegral wrote:Show nested quote +On October 13 2012 05:01 TheMooseHeed wrote: Coming from a guy I could never fully understand her perspective but I see bullying as just a fact of life, if she couldnt handle school bullying she would have been hard pressed to handle the real world which is full of even worse bullies.
I am however angered that she wasnt given the tools to deal with bullying from her parents and teachers etc
System let her down Have you entered the "real world"? Is that a joke? The "real world" as you put it has a lot of people that generally speaking are much better at minding their own business and not gossiping about everything. What "real world" do you live in where bullies are worse? It's generally accepted that bullying is at its worse in middle-high school (imo mostly middle school, only time I was ever bullied was ~2 years, and not severely thank god).
Ok so maybe it isnt worse but in my experience the person who is most willing to be inconsiderate of other peoples feelings and be a dick generally can 1 up the 'nice' people. The stakes are much higher compared to school life where you have little real life things to worry about. The amount of times I have seen people bully others into getting something advantagous too themselves is unreal.
The old British empire basically became a super power because they were massive bullies.
On the topic of gossip when I worked at tk maxx during 6th form staff gossiped about each other maliciously all the time. I'm sure some people wept and complained about it and I recall someone leaving over it.
Just in my experience anyway which I will admit is not much as I am only 20
|
as nazghul said the world is brutal and nobody deserves this regardless of what they did the idea of starting a fresh when moving away or schools is something that should happen but for something like this to be constantly carried on is just wrong, even if there may have been a mistake in which she kept contact with certain people something like this shouldn't of happened and someone should have noticed it to do something about it....
school was a bad place for me i got bullied alot but i had to grit it and bear it even tho i had no friends i was happy that way because of communities in the games i played sc / w3 / wow i always had friendly company when i needed / wanted it... schools are such a bad place for young people now days if people see you as an outsider or a bit strange from the norm ... you get shunned instantly
its sad something like this has happened though as it sounds like it went on fora long time :[
|
Ooo ya! i live near there!
|
|
|
|