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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
July 16 2015 22:17 GMT
#13061
On July 17 2015 07:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 06:49 LemOn wrote:
gl soldier we're waiting for the report


Hehe thanks! I have a feeling she will want to, she is the one talking about sending bikini pics and she was the one who started the make-out session when we met the last time.

She 100% wants to.
Asking you if you want to see her again
spontaneous kiss on 1st date
make out 2nd
her place 3rd
everything's text book pretty much
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States46227 Posts
July 16 2015 22:41 GMT
#13062
On July 17 2015 06:44 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Yes. Going to her place tomorrow, so maybe not after tomorrow .
Quote from her: "if it gets too late you can always sleep over here, just so you know ".


Good luck man Make sure you bring a condom or two!
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18378 Posts
July 16 2015 23:47 GMT
#13063
On July 17 2015 07:01 LemOn wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 05:30 Zooper31 wrote:
On July 17 2015 04:48 LemOn wrote:
What's your strategy about girls you're dating meeting your friends and family btw?
When, circumstances etc.


I feel like it should be a natural occurrence. It shouldn't be something that is explicitly setup with the sole purpose of meeting the family. Otherwise it just becomes something that is awkward and stiff and there's lots of questions involved like you're at a job interview. If you are together long enough and you aren't hiding it, you should just naturally meet them someday and introduce yourself. Eventually you will be invited to stuff and it just becomes normal and life goes on.

Yeah she bumped into my mum once. When mum was visiting without me knowing, and that was okay.

But like I have 2 pals I haven't seen for 2 years visiting, they are staying for 6 days (both speak English). I will of course go with them to help them out with some pickup first 2 nights - noway I'm inviting her to that.

But How weird it would be if later the 3 of us+her hang out, e.g. for hiking one day. Not really sure about this - we've been going on 1-2 dates per week for over 4 months, strictly together and everything works so well.

So 3 options
1) I will blow off my mates for one night to go on a date with her then join them later
2) Me + my mates will try to pickup 2 chicks in town, try to get them to commit to do stuff one day, that way it's 3chicks + 3 guys, and we'll go hiking or some other stuff.
3) Failing that just ask her to go to town with us - watch them do pickup, tell them what to do/set them missions (that'd be fun actually we're both really creative when it comes to that - she's a massive troll. And I'll show them how it's done on first 2 days so they should at least have to balls to do approaches)


I guess option 3 sounds good when I think about it, we could have stories for a long time after they leave

You haven't seen them in 2 years. What makes you think they haven't figured out how to approach women in that time too?
IgnE
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7681 Posts
July 17 2015 00:23 GMT
#13064
On July 17 2015 07:01 LemOn wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 05:30 Zooper31 wrote:
On July 17 2015 04:48 LemOn wrote:
What's your strategy about girls you're dating meeting your friends and family btw?
When, circumstances etc.


I feel like it should be a natural occurrence. It shouldn't be something that is explicitly setup with the sole purpose of meeting the family. Otherwise it just becomes something that is awkward and stiff and there's lots of questions involved like you're at a job interview. If you are together long enough and you aren't hiding it, you should just naturally meet them someday and introduce yourself. Eventually you will be invited to stuff and it just becomes normal and life goes on.

Yeah she bumped into my mum once. When mum was visiting without me knowing, and that was okay.

But like I have 2 pals I haven't seen for 2 years visiting, they are staying for 6 days (both speak English). I will of course go with them to help them out with some pickup first 2 nights - noway I'm inviting her to that.

But How weird it would be if later the 3 of us+her hang out, e.g. for hiking one day. Not really sure about this - we've been going on 1-2 dates per week for over 4 months, strictly together and everything works so well.

So 3 options
1) I will blow off my mates for one night to go on a date with her then join them later
2) Me + my mates will try to pickup 2 chicks in town, try to get them to commit to do stuff one day, that way it's 3chicks + 3 guys, and we'll go hiking or some other stuff.
3) Failing that just ask her to go to town with us - watch them do pickup, tell them what to do/set them missions (that'd be fun actually we're both really creative when it comes to that - she's a massive troll. And I'll show them how it's done on first 2 days so they should at least have to balls to do approaches)


I guess option 3 sounds good when I think about it, we could have stories for a long time after they leave


Things are only weird if you let them be weird. Your state of mind should dominate the proceedings. I don't see why you wouldn't want to let your mates meet this person that you like.

On July 17 2015 07:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 06:49 LemOn wrote:
gl soldier we're waiting for the report


Hehe thanks! I have a feeling she will want to, she is the one talking about sending bikini pics and she was the one who started the make-out session when we met the last time.


She's probably frustrated you haven't made your own moves yet.
The unrealistic sound of these propositions is indicative, not of their utopian character, but of the strength of the forces which prevent their realization.
Titusmaster6
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States5937 Posts
July 17 2015 01:29 GMT
#13065
On July 17 2015 07:41 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 06:44 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Yes. Going to her place tomorrow, so maybe not after tomorrow .
Quote from her: "if it gets too late you can always sleep over here, just so you know ".


Good luck man Make sure you bring a condom or two!

Bring 3
Shorts down shorts up, BOOM, just like that.
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18866 Posts
July 17 2015 01:38 GMT
#13066
On July 17 2015 10:29 Titusmaster6 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 07:41 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On July 17 2015 06:44 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Yes. Going to her place tomorrow, so maybe not after tomorrow .
Quote from her: "if it gets too late you can always sleep over here, just so you know ".


Good luck man Make sure you bring a condom or two!

Bring 3

Actually more than 3 is the sweet spot
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
IgnE
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7681 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-07-17 01:43:33
July 17 2015 01:42 GMT
#13067
That way if you fuck one up you can still fuck three times.
The unrealistic sound of these propositions is indicative, not of their utopian character, but of the strength of the forces which prevent their realization.
Yoav
Profile Joined March 2011
United States1874 Posts
July 17 2015 06:59 GMT
#13068
On July 17 2015 10:38 farvacola wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 10:29 Titusmaster6 wrote:
On July 17 2015 07:41 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On July 17 2015 06:44 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Yes. Going to her place tomorrow, so maybe not after tomorrow .
Quote from her: "if it gets too late you can always sleep over here, just so you know ".


Good luck man Make sure you bring a condom or two!

Bring 3

Actually more than 3 is the sweet spot


I hear sometimes you'll need every last one...

+ Show Spoiler +
#CondomBrag is one of the most hilarious ways of projecting masculinity in a way that's barely less subtle than talking about dick length, but still highly entertaining. Try out: "Why do they even sell the small packs of condoms. It's way more economical to get the 60-packs" or "Oh, you use X condom... Don't you think they're kinda tight?" Warning: do not attempt at home unless you're okay with losing non-douchebag friends.
waffelz
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
Germany711 Posts
July 17 2015 08:36 GMT
#13069
On July 17 2015 15:59 Yoav wrote:
+ Show Spoiler +
#CondomBrag is one of the most hilarious ways of projecting masculinity in a way that's barely less subtle than talking about dick length, but still highly entertaining. Try out: "Why do they even sell the small packs of condoms. It's way more economical to get the 60-packs" or "Oh, you use X condom... Don't you think they're kinda tight?" Warning: do not attempt at home unless you're okay with losing non-douchebag friends.


I think the real brag would be pointing out that, as long as you can buy your condoms in the store, you arent that gifted. Even better: act suprised that someone is able to use the condoms from the store. Look at them in a short moment of suprise, then just smirk and walk away.

For real though, if you happen to end up in a conversation, where someone "casually" mentions that he has to buy brand X which is something along the lines of "extra large" (the US version of this would be the magnum brand I think), just casually point out to them that those arent really all that big and usually only covers the standard deviations of penis sizes, which means that its not that big.
Or talk with a few close female friends about penis sizes(this one is actual advice. It can be really usefull, especially if you are truly above/below average by a significant margin), get some knowledge and own with that, just leave out the part of personal preferences. There arent much easier ways to tear someones confident down than countering their penis/condombrag.
RIP "The big travis CS degree thread", taken from us too soon | Honourable forum princess, defended by Rebs-approved white knights
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States24143 Posts
July 17 2015 08:41 GMT
#13070
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.
"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
waffelz
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
Germany711 Posts
July 17 2015 08:53 GMT
#13071
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.


I dont know how statistically justified your precaucion is, but given the fact that it can potentially screw up your life and doesnt take much to prevent, I would say it is reasonable. It doesnt even have to involve bad intentions from the women, she could just stored the condom wrong and bringing your own seems common sense anyways. I strongly believe that contraception is mostly the mans job, since he has no saying if things go wrong(at least here in germany) plus, he is the only one who can use protection that also prevents the spread of STDs and it really doesnt take much.

To fit the condombrag-theme:
Just have a penis big enough, that the chances she has a fitting condom are extremely low. This way you can snuck in a #CondomBrag in the very last moment where it makes sense.
RIP "The big travis CS degree thread", taken from us too soon | Honourable forum princess, defended by Rebs-approved white knights
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
July 17 2015 08:55 GMT
#13072
On July 17 2015 09:23 IgnE wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 07:01 LemOn wrote:
On July 17 2015 05:30 Zooper31 wrote:
On July 17 2015 04:48 LemOn wrote:
What's your strategy about girls you're dating meeting your friends and family btw?
When, circumstances etc.


I feel like it should be a natural occurrence. It shouldn't be something that is explicitly setup with the sole purpose of meeting the family. Otherwise it just becomes something that is awkward and stiff and there's lots of questions involved like you're at a job interview. If you are together long enough and you aren't hiding it, you should just naturally meet them someday and introduce yourself. Eventually you will be invited to stuff and it just becomes normal and life goes on.

Yeah she bumped into my mum once. When mum was visiting without me knowing, and that was okay.

But like I have 2 pals I haven't seen for 2 years visiting, they are staying for 6 days (both speak English). I will of course go with them to help them out with some pickup first 2 nights - noway I'm inviting her to that.

But How weird it would be if later the 3 of us+her hang out, e.g. for hiking one day. Not really sure about this - we've been going on 1-2 dates per week for over 4 months, strictly together and everything works so well.

So 3 options
1) I will blow off my mates for one night to go on a date with her then join them later
2) Me + my mates will try to pickup 2 chicks in town, try to get them to commit to do stuff one day, that way it's 3chicks + 3 guys, and we'll go hiking or some other stuff.
3) Failing that just ask her to go to town with us - watch them do pickup, tell them what to do/set them missions (that'd be fun actually we're both really creative when it comes to that - she's a massive troll. And I'll show them how it's done on first 2 days so they should at least have to balls to do approaches)


I guess option 3 sounds good when I think about it, we could have stories for a long time after they leave


Things are only weird if you let them be weird. Your state of mind should dominate the proceedings. I don't see why you wouldn't want to let your mates meet this person that you like.


yeah true, I'm over thinking stuff
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
Snotling
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany885 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-07-17 10:15:02
July 17 2015 10:11 GMT
#13073
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.



There is also the size thing. If condoms fail, in a lot of cases its the wrong size, both too big and too small are dangerous. There are also quite a few slightly different shapes.
A couple years back I got a mixed bag with like 40 different condoms from a onlineshop. After trying them all on I just ordered a bigger quantity of the one that fit the best.

You also safe money, because comdoms get very cheap if you buy a 100. And they last long enough that using them all up in time isnt a problem.
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18378 Posts
July 17 2015 11:38 GMT
#13074
On July 17 2015 19:11 Snotling wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.



There is also the size thing. If condoms fail, in a lot of cases its the wrong size, both too big and too small are dangerous. There are also quite a few slightly different shapes.
A couple years back I got a mixed bag with like 40 different condoms from a onlineshop. After trying them all on I just ordered a bigger quantity of the one that fit the best.

You also safe money, because comdoms get very cheap if you buy a 100. And they last long enough that using them all up in time isnt a problem.

You forgot #CondomBrag at the end of that post...
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18866 Posts
July 17 2015 11:39 GMT
#13075
This seems relevant to the prior discussion.

+ Show Spoiler +
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
waffelz
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
Germany711 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-07-17 12:14:28
July 17 2015 12:11 GMT
#13076
Lets fire this up with more #CondomBrag.
+ Show Spoiler +
And in a few hours I come back and drop discourageing truth about penis sizes, especially lenght


But Actually, there is quite some advice in here. It is wise to take care of protection yourself and Snotling is right about buying bigger packages to save money, but even more: If you never used a condom before, try out first which one fits you like Snotling said. A condom thats to big/small is risky. Also, your penis doesnt have to be extremely long, its diameter is also important. By your first time, you might be nervous and therefore dont reach "full size" and the condom might just fit and on the second or third time, you get really confused because the condom is way to tight/wont even fit at all + Show Spoiler +
#CondomBrag
. So do your preparation in advance.
RIP "The big travis CS degree thread", taken from us too soon | Honourable forum princess, defended by Rebs-approved white knights
Snotling
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany885 Posts
July 17 2015 12:23 GMT
#13077
On July 17 2015 20:38 Acrofales wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 19:11 Snotling wrote:
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.



There is also the size thing. If condoms fail, in a lot of cases its the wrong size, both too big and too small are dangerous. There are also quite a few slightly different shapes.
A couple years back I got a mixed bag with like 40 different condoms from a onlineshop. After trying them all on I just ordered a bigger quantity of the one that fit the best.

You also safe money, because comdoms get very cheap if you buy a 100. And they last long enough that using them all up in time isnt a problem.

You forgot #CondomBrag at the end of that post...



how is 100 condoms in three years (thats how long they last iirc) a brag? thats not even one use per week. if someone is in a relationship for example, thats really low
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18378 Posts
July 17 2015 12:27 GMT
#13078
On July 17 2015 21:23 Snotling wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 20:38 Acrofales wrote:
On July 17 2015 19:11 Snotling wrote:
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.



There is also the size thing. If condoms fail, in a lot of cases its the wrong size, both too big and too small are dangerous. There are also quite a few slightly different shapes.
A couple years back I got a mixed bag with like 40 different condoms from a onlineshop. After trying them all on I just ordered a bigger quantity of the one that fit the best.

You also safe money, because comdoms get very cheap if you buy a 100. And they last long enough that using them all up in time isnt a problem.

You forgot #CondomBrag at the end of that post...



how is 100 condoms in three years (thats how long they last iirc) a brag? thats not even one use per week. if someone is in a relationship for example, thats really low

If someone is in a steady relationship for 3 years, I expect they don't use condoms at all. I don't. There are far more convenient contraceptives than the condom for people in a stable relationship. Seriously, fuck messing around with a rubber when you want to have sex.
Snotling
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany885 Posts
July 17 2015 12:36 GMT
#13079
On July 17 2015 21:27 Acrofales wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 21:23 Snotling wrote:
On July 17 2015 20:38 Acrofales wrote:
On July 17 2015 19:11 Snotling wrote:
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.



There is also the size thing. If condoms fail, in a lot of cases its the wrong size, both too big and too small are dangerous. There are also quite a few slightly different shapes.
A couple years back I got a mixed bag with like 40 different condoms from a onlineshop. After trying them all on I just ordered a bigger quantity of the one that fit the best.

You also safe money, because comdoms get very cheap if you buy a 100. And they last long enough that using them all up in time isnt a problem.

You forgot #CondomBrag at the end of that post...



how is 100 condoms in three years (thats how long they last iirc) a brag? thats not even one use per week. if someone is in a relationship for example, thats really low

If someone is in a steady relationship for 3 years, I expect they don't use condoms at all. I don't. There are far more convenient contraceptives than the condom for people in a stable relationship. Seriously, fuck messing around with a rubber when you want to have sex.


Of course its not ideal, but i know quite a few women who cant take the pill vor various reasons. So in some cases there isnt really a way around it.
SixStrings
Profile Blog Joined August 2013
Germany2046 Posts
July 17 2015 14:32 GMT
#13080
On July 17 2015 20:38 Acrofales wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 17 2015 19:11 Snotling wrote:
On July 17 2015 17:41 GreenHorizons wrote:
Is it paranoid that I never trusted women's condoms or is that a rational precaution? Women's condom meaning a male condom procured by a woman, not an actual female condom.



There is also the size thing. If condoms fail, in a lot of cases its the wrong size, both too big and too small are dangerous. There are also quite a few slightly different shapes.
A couple years back I got a mixed bag with like 40 different condoms from a onlineshop. After trying them all on I just ordered a bigger quantity of the one that fit the best.

You also safe money, because comdoms get very cheap if you buy a 100. And they last long enough that using them all up in time isnt a problem.

You forgot #CondomBrag at the end of that post...


Ever since I put a normal sized condom over my entire leg and reached up to my upper thigh, I refuse to believe that anyone is endowed enough to fill out a condom.

Maybe in anime or other fucked up fiction, or in the animal world, but certainly not even The Mountain has a 50 cm, 20 kg penis.
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