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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On June 19 2015 19:59 bloodwhore~ wrote: I've already sent a message that she didn't respond to and removed her. you pretty much screwed up so good that you did - this is how you set dates through texts next/tinder time. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On June 19 2015 20:00 LemOn wrote: you pretty much screwed up so good that you did - this is how you set dates through texts next/tinder time. I highly doubt the problem was the way I trying to set it up, it was the thing I revealed that put her off. 100%. | ||
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
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unsaeglich
260 Posts
 Once you have (good) sex, you will find out how much you enjoy being this girl. I was in a similar situation, and I was until a few month with that girl together, total 1,5+ years. Great time though. I am somewhat active on tinder too, and managed to be together (for 3 weeks, it seems) with an incredibly hot, and strange 18 year old girl ( I am 25 now). And while she's every nerds dream (so mine too ofc) : petite half japanese girl with natural white blond hair (albino influences), swiss, american and german pass, watches this anime stuff in japanese( translates to me fluently while watching), plays dota / lol / wc3 / cod / and some mmorpg's, worked as model, and didn't have a partner or a relationship in the past 2 years (she is very inexperienced and ehrm.. incredibly tight). For some reason she works at least 12 houres a days as apprentice for stylist (haircutter). For her it's that important that in her little free time she takes extra customers and makes their hair, and weekends too, that she has basicly no time left to do anything else. (I don't think money is the reason, maybe for the extra work, but as apprentice you don't get paid by hours..) Anyway meeting with her, regularly is become more and more impossible, as she also doesn't have a very good timemanagement (spend one saturday wondering if she would show up eventually), no clue what she was thinking looking for a steady relationship. This world is weird. So let's see what else tinder has in store for us, I wouldn't mind a shade more normal.. | ||
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lastpuritan
United States540 Posts
need to find a good diamond ring shop, any franchise? | ||
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Snotling
Germany885 Posts
On June 19 2015 23:08 unsaeglich wrote: I can't wait you for you to fall in love with the girl that teaches you sex Once you have (good) sex, you will find out how much you enjoy being this girl. I was in a similar situation, and I was until a few month with that girl together, total 1,5+ years. Great time though. I am somewhat active on tinder too, and managed to be together (for 3 weeks, it seems) with an incredibly hot, and strange 18 year old girl ( I am 25 now). And while she's every nerds dream (so mine too ofc) : petite half japanese girl with natural white blond hair (albino influences), swiss, american and german pass, watches this anime stuff in japanese( translates to me fluently while watching), plays dota / lol / wc3 / cod / and some mmorpg's, worked as model, and didn't have a partner or a relationship in the past 2 years (she is very inexperienced and ehrm.. incredibly tight). For some reason she works at least 12 houres a days as apprentice for stylist (haircutter). For her it's that important that in her little free time she takes extra customers and makes their hair, and weekends too, that she has basicly no time left to do anything else. (I don't think money is the reason, maybe for the extra work, but as apprentice you don't get paid by hours..) Anyway meeting with her, regularly is become more and more impossible, as she also doesn't have a very good timemanagement (spend one saturday wondering if she would show up eventually), no clue what she was thinking looking for a steady relationship. This world is weird. So let's see what else tinder has in store for us, I wouldn't mind a shade more normal.. Girls who have lots of sex get more tight, not less. Because the muscles in their vagina get more exercise (kegels also helps). more sex = less tight is a porn myth (as long as the women doesnt give birth). Also it might have to do with inexperienced women cramping up. | ||
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lastpuritan
United States540 Posts
edit: what did i just write, haahaha | ||
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unsaeglich
260 Posts
On June 19 2015 23:19 Snotling wrote: Girls who have lots of sex get more tight, not less. Because the muscles in their vagina get more exercise (kegels also helps). more sex = less tight is a porn myth (as long as the women doesnt give birth). Also it might have to do with inexperienced women cramping up. I didn't give a reason to why she was tight, I just stated that she was, and I didn't mean to imply a reason also. I think it's coz she's asian, but I won't know for sure, so what does it matter. | ||
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Snotling
Germany885 Posts
On June 19 2015 23:32 unsaeglich wrote: I didn't give a reason to why she was tight, I just stated that she was, and I didn't mean to imply a reason also. I think it's coz she's asian, but I won't know for sure, so what does it matter. If you write: "and didn't have a partner or a relationship in the past 2 years (she is very inexperienced and ehrm.. incredibly tight). " it at least sound like you are implying a connection. but never mind. | ||
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unsaeglich
260 Posts
On June 19 2015 23:19 lastpuritan wrote: been so long but i'll update just in case you remember, i bought her lilies, a bouquet well shaped, not so huge, not so tiny. she cried as expected, saying this is the first time a guy brings her flowers. i was overthinking when to gift because normally i pick her up with car and it wouldnt be nice to take flowers from backseat while driving so i decided to lie and told my ride is on service, i cant pick her this time, we decided to have desserts and i went early, tried to figure out what should be my entrance words, i dont know why but when she got here i picked the wrong one and hugged her, it was something like "they are no match for your beauty, but your hands shall only carry these" :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D I THINK I AM BACK TO MY FOURTEENS......... need to find a good diamond ring shop, any franchise? That's amazing, the compliment is quite epic. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On June 19 2015 23:06 IgnE wrote: Probably your other messages also. I don't think I'm that bad otherwise. I'm pretty good at talking shit over text, given that the other person is somewhat interesting. She sent a shitton of wink smilies etc. She might have been a bit off put by my level of banter. I enjoy teasing people and discussing things so when she mentioned Crossfit I just started talking about how it is literally shit  . I of course didn't just flame and I backed my shit up with proof. On the other hand if she can't handle a discussion then she is it not for me anyways. | ||
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Acrofales
Spain18239 Posts
On June 20 2015 01:17 bloodwhore~ wrote: I don't think I'm that bad otherwise. I'm pretty good at talking shit over text, given that the other person is somewhat interesting. She sent a shitton of wink smilies etc. She might have been a bit off put by my level of banter. I enjoy teasing people and discussing things so when she mentioned Crossfit I just started talking about how it is literally shit . I of course didn't just flame and I backed my shit up with proof. On the other hand if she can't handle a discussion then she is it not for me anyways.Ok, sounds fine, but this: On June 19 2015 18:51 bloodwhore~ wrote: Asked her if she was still up for saturday or if she lost her interest. No answer for 10 hours to that question or to the other one so into the trash the match went. Might have to initiate contact with girls myself now. sends big red flags. | ||
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unsaeglich
260 Posts
On June 20 2015 01:17 bloodwhore~ wrote: I don't think I'm that bad otherwise. I'm pretty good at talking shit over text, given that the other person is somewhat interesting. She sent a shitton of wink smilies etc. She might have been a bit off put by my level of banter. I enjoy teasing people and discussing things so when she mentioned Crossfit I just started talking about how it is literally shit . I of course didn't just flame and I backed my shit up with proof. On the other hand if she can't handle a discussion then she is it not for me anyways.your standards for "fuck buddies" are extremly high, haha. Really though, you should save your deep knowledge criticism for after the first meeting maybe.. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On June 20 2015 01:21 Acrofales wrote: Might have to initiate contact with girls myself now. sends big red flags. Well I only asked this because she answer a question I sent her for an entire day. I considered it a loss already and just wanted to hear a clear no. She didn't even give me that which kinda makes me happy since then it makes it so much easier to get over her knowing she is a bit of a cunt. your standards for "fuck buddies" are extremly high, haha. Really though, you should save your deep knowledge criticism for after the first meeting maybe.. They sure are. Yeah I probably should have if I really wanted to have her as a fuck buddy. I'm just having fun with Tinder at the moment and this was more of a yolo type deal. I'm going back home in a few days as well. | ||
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
I can say that it's clear to me that the only cunt in that exchange was you. | ||
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WarSame
Canada1950 Posts
On June 19 2015 18:51 bloodwhore~ wrote: Asked her if she was still up for saturday or if she lost her interest. No answer for 10 hours to that question or to the other one so into the trash the match went. Might have to initiate contact with girls myself now. Christ you're fucking terrible at this... | ||
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obesechicken13
United States10467 Posts
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WarSame
Canada1950 Posts
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On June 19 2015 23:08 unsaeglich wrote: I can't wait you for you to fall in love with the girl that teaches you sex Once you have (good) sex, you will find out how much you enjoy being this girl. I was in a similar situation, and I was until a few month with that girl together, total 1,5+ years. Great time though. I am somewhat active on tinder too, and managed to be together (for 3 weeks, it seems) with an incredibly hot, and strange 18 year old girl ( I am 25 now). And while she's every nerds dream (so mine too ofc) : petite half japanese girl with natural white blond hair (albino influences), swiss, american and german pass, watches this anime stuff in japanese( translates to me fluently while watching), plays dota / lol / wc3 / cod / and some mmorpg's, worked as model, and didn't have a partner or a relationship in the past 2 years (she is very inexperienced and ehrm.. incredibly tight). For some reason she works at least 12 houres a days as apprentice for stylist (haircutter). For her it's that important that in her little free time she takes extra customers and makes their hair, and weekends too, that she has basicly no time left to do anything else. (I don't think money is the reason, maybe for the extra work, but as apprentice you don't get paid by hours..) Anyway meeting with her, regularly is become more and more impossible, as she also doesn't have a very good timemanagement (spend one saturday wondering if she would show up eventually), no clue what she was thinking looking for a steady relationship. This world is weird. So let's see what else tinder has in store for us, I wouldn't mind a shade more normal.. Some girls are like that, moreso the Asian ones. Don't see a reason to break it off with this one in the meantime tho? She seems good for a loose relationship without strings | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On June 19 2015 02:11 LemOn wrote: It's like a secondary thing that gives you confidence - it's helpful, like anything positive you do for yourself that makes you a more attractive and healthy/happy person overall . But there are way more direct, faster and longer lasting ways to improve dating skills themselves. You know - like dating a lot for instance :p Btw Jeez. Had the puppey love goggles on with this chick, now I realized. She is literally late to every single date Initiated contact twice in total in 3 months Leaves spaces between answering messages, sometimes doesn't answer at all to a question. On three separate occasions when I spontaneously told her I'm going to this thing and that I'd love her to join me, she says she's studying next 4 days. And that reply came after 12 hours. And yesterday she didn't come at all after my quirky text telling her where to meet me. Thought her interest level is high enough to send her a big ass over complicated text and she'd read it and I can do something dorky like that cause the interest level is high enough, but obvy I was wrong/not paying attention to her. She's like super present at all times so that's just her. But still last couple weeks I stopped watching porn, run every day, started eating healthy, keep training social skills (promoted myself from drunk to sober. Nerve wracking, but I managed to talk to every person of interest after a lot of stress at an expat event - still can't be my genuine self when sober) and it's like my head became clear and I realized that I don't want to stand for that bullshit really - I passed on a lot of great girls that were clearly into me because of this one. I care about her a lot tho, so my plan's to tighten up my game - no texting, no long phone calls, get to know her more on dates (was auto piloting so far not really trying that much as I was tired/not on my A game on a lot of them - I realized I stopped asking questions about her - getting laid so why try right? Wrong. ), after a date tell her to call me when she'll know when she's free again and get back to scheduled dates only. And if she's late again...just leave and tell her where to meet me and how to get there (I always plan event based dates or cool places where I'd go regardless if it's with her or not) Comments? So I took my actions - Asked a lot more about her+listened more on a date instead of focusing on the usual sexual stuff/the surroundings. She started telling me about all these lame guys who are her friends and then start professing their love to her etc. One even never had the balls to ever tell her and then texted her that he's in love with her and she can go fuck herself for going out with me. . When she came on time to the date I told her I see it as normal that I expect her to be always on time. Then after when she left loads of scratches all over my body and was freaked out I grabbed her - and told her to keep doing what she's doing, that I love it and if I wouldn't I would tell her directly. And then told her that it's not like when she's coming late - that I don't like that and next time she's late I will leave and leave her instructions on a scavenger hunt on how to find me (in a teasing but serious way) When she left I told her that I want her to give me a call or text me once she knows she's free and we'll do something fun again. I mean the girls awesome, she even brought me a cake she made,is passionate in bed, we have freaky moments of the same thoughts popping up (like I put on 4 blue things and told my friend I'm wearing 50 shades of blue 4 days ago. And then that was the first thing out of her mouth when she saw me today) like same movies, overthinking humor, messing with people etc. She learns fast with dirty talk too . Think she's worth the effort in being direct, re-evaluating if we're on the right path like I did from time to time (I have a notepad where I write down what I'm thinking about, mainly for poker but that's how I realized she's doing stuff I shouldn't tolerate) and calling her out and steer her on the stuff all the friend zoned jackasses obviously tolerated with her. EDIT: jackasses is a bit strong, I was like that before I started working on myself as well I must say. So I guess...regular people? :D | ||
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