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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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Badfatpanda
United States9719 Posts
On August 20 2013 09:29 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Nine years apart!?!? That's like a senior in high school dating a third grader. Ewwwwwwwwww. + Show Spoiler + + Show Spoiler + | ||
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QuanticHawk
United States32102 Posts
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Chemist391
United States366 Posts
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aTnClouD
Italy2428 Posts
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QuanticHawk
United States32102 Posts
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aTnClouD
Italy2428 Posts
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NotSorry
United States6722 Posts
On August 20 2013 09:25 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Her talking to me like I was still 14, just took me so far out of the right mind set. I should have kept going for it lolGood shit, man. A hug is halfway to second base. You're so in there. | ||
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QuanticHawk
United States32102 Posts
On August 20 2013 09:41 Chemist391 wrote: Indeed. The test of all knowledge is experiment. best way to approach dating early on. all you are wasting is a few hours and a few bucks. not really a big deal to be wrong On August 20 2013 09:47 aTnClouD wrote: b more mad pls quant hardly mad; humored is more accurate | ||
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Najda
United States3765 Posts
On August 20 2013 09:42 aTnClouD wrote: Hey let's not be too focused on the age difference I think it's less about the number and more about the fact that she's still in highschool and you're of the age that people typically have finished college and are starting their careers. Then again I don't know either of you so I can't really comment on the relationship, other than she seems very immature if she cut her wrists in response to her parents saying you two can't date. There's an 18yo girl in my class that I sort of liked for a while (I just turned 23) but I realized the age difference was too big of a deal for me to really put effort into pursuing her. | ||
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goMERICA
United States29 Posts
Online dating has changed drastically in the past half year with the social media app Tinder becoming very popular. It has made most of the other sites/apps temporarily irrelevant within the 18-30 age range in America. The idea is that you link your account to your Facebook, allowing (hopefully) current pictures to be easily uploaded to your profile. Profiles are almost completely based on the four or so pictures you upload; there isn't much room for adding a personal description. Next, when you are ready to search, you are shown pictures of women's profiles one by one and all you do is check yes or no based on looks. You can view 500 profiles in 20 minutes if you know what you like in terms of looks. Distance from you, age, and proximity within the Facebook network is primarily what determines whose profile you are shown. When someone checks yes to your profile, it will give priority to their profile and show them to you so you can check yes or no. When two people mutually check "yes", a connection is made and you are able to send that person a message. The big difference between Tinder and other online dating mediums is that the ratio of women to men is far greater than on the other sites because it's viewed as less creepy. Why is it less creepy? Two big reasons. First, girls aren't bombarded from messages from guys they think of being below their league, and second, girls think that guys are less likely to put false information on there in the form of pictures or description as the accounts are linked to Facebook and many matches are made via friends of friends (you can see who your mutual friends are with the person if you have any). I have explored my fair share of online dating mediums and this is by far my favorite. You don't have to deal with the issue of wondering whether this person is attracted to you or not; you already know they are feelin' you and they already know you are feelin' them! You can go straight to flirting and don't have to give a bullshit description of yourself really fast, hoping that you'll draw them in with what you claim to be your personality traits. That shit is overplayed and no one really wants to hear it; people just say it because they feel like it's necessary. You can just talk to them and get to that stuff gradually along the way. On to the criticisms I'd expect to hear from people, namely that the system is shallow as hell, disregards the intellectual side of romance and you'll never be matched with someone whose inner beauty is makes you attracted to their outer beauty. That beauty won't last forevery, duh! These are basically all true. But at the end of the day you're going through so many people on there that you will find, out of say 15 or so matches, someone who you get along with. It's a trade that I welcome for knowing that the girls I'm chatting with are actually attracted to me. Now let me talk about the success I've had on Tinder. I've chatted with approximately 50 girls on there so far over the past two months and 1/2 of them have asked to meet up before I even offered. Typically they have offered their cell #s at the conclusion of a night's chatting with the excuse that they didn't wanna chat on there any more("just text me! # here"), and at that point I make them add me on Facebook so I can make sure they are legit. After a couple days of chatting they ask about meeting up. In total I've been on 10 dates from there and most of them turned out to be a friendship type chemistry going on but a few have been more. Twice I have been asked out in less than 20 lines of text, and one of those girls was damn near perfect as far as what my type is. She used me to buy her drinks, but you know what that's okay cuz we're going out this weekend again, and I think I have a great shot. All of the chicks I have met have been pretty and most have been beautiful. One of them has become a good friend for the time being. For the Tinder newbs: if you have had good success with dating, then check yes and no based on the kind of girls you WANT to date in terms of looks. If you haven't had good success with dating, check yes on every girl so you can gauge which girls are in your league. Remember, out of everyone who checks yes to you, you get to choose which girls you spend your time talking to. Prioritize the ones who attract you the most. And above all else, DO NOT become discouraged if it doesn't work out with a particular chick. Move on and talk to other girls. It's free and you have nothing to lose, so give it a try. TL;DR Check out Tinder, the new online dating app, for it is the most popular thing out right now and the online dating medium most likely to lead to you actually meeting someone. I and many people I know have had good success with it. | ||
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Badfatpanda
United States9719 Posts
On August 20 2013 09:42 aTnClouD wrote: Hey let's not be too focused on the age difference I love you man, but I think that her cutting her wrists as a sign of outrage against her parents shows that she might be a little young to truly gauge what is in her best interests. Her parents may be right, every person is different, regardless of consent. | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States45210 Posts
On to the criticisms I'd expect to hear from people, namely that the system is shallow as hell, disregards the intellectual side of romance and you'll never be matched with someone whose inner beauty is makes you attracted to their outer beauty. Yeah, these were pretty much all my concerns too when you said this Tinder thing is solely based on looks. While they're important, it's surely better to have more information than less (and the other, more popular, dating sites include many other things in a person's bio along with pictures). TL;DR Check out Tinder, the new online dating app, for it is the most popular thing out right now and the online dating medium most likely to lead to you actually meeting someone. I and many people I know have had good success with it. Also, I don't know if this is practically advertising. | ||
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goMERICA
United States29 Posts
On August 20 2013 10:17 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Yeah, these were pretty much all my concerns too when you said this Tinder thing is solely based on looks. While they're important, it's surely better to have more information than less (and the other, more popular, dating sites include many other things in a person's bio along with pictures). Also, I don't know if this is practically advertising. I'm only advertising it because I think a lot of people who read this thread are having bad luck with dating. Once a better online dating medium comes out, use that by all means. I agree with you that less information is worse than more information. But the thing is that you get that information when you talk to them. As in the same thing that happens when you choose to approach a girl in real life. You know she's attractive enough and your conversation is what allows you to get to know whether or not she might be a match for you. You're trading the chance to get information on them without knowing them for the comfort of knowing that they're already attracted to you (and the wider selection that you get from this particular app). Edit grammar | ||
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QuanticHawk
United States32102 Posts
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farvacola
United States18845 Posts
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States45210 Posts
On August 20 2013 10:25 farvacola wrote: The signal to noise ratio in online dating sucks, actually talking with people whom you meet day to day works wonders, y'all should try it. Here's the kicker: no app! Who knew? Reality: There's an app for that. | ||
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QuanticHawk
United States32102 Posts
but for real though, the trope about online dating being only for weirdos and shut-ins is totally not true. but i guess that varies depending on where you are | ||
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goMERICA
United States29 Posts
Not going to defend the app's merits any longer because I've said everything I can really, and I'm not the type to sit here and argue or make fun of my TeamLiquid buddies. | ||
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NotSorry
United States6722 Posts
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Salazarz
Korea (South)2591 Posts
btw. you're a supposedly grown-up man trying to date a high schooler. It's creepy. As in, really "get the hell away from her" kind of creepy. | ||
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