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Chef
10810 Posts
I put them back and went to the washroom to clean my hands. I stepped in the spilt soda. "Fuck, you might as well use my sock to clean it up." I take off my sock and throw it to him. Jizz tissues. + Show Spoiler + Seriously, old jizz tissues. Gross. Who does that? Why? Could be a little more sanitary, please.  | ||
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Lemonwalrus
United States5465 Posts
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Fontong
United States6454 Posts
LOL | ||
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Torenhire
United States11681 Posts
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ghermination
United States2851 Posts
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paper
13196 Posts
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Deleted User 31060
3788 Posts
he doesn't jizz in his pants like the rest of us? | ||
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BanZu
United States3329 Posts
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Hyde
Australia14568 Posts
Imagine if it wasn't dried up haha | ||
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OmgIRok
Taiwan2699 Posts
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EvilTeletubby
Baltimore, USA22251 Posts
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Cambium
United States16368 Posts
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jello_biafra
United Kingdom6635 Posts
Eww bad luck man...did he actually use your sock to clean the stuff up? :O | ||
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Chef
10810 Posts
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29 fps
United States5724 Posts
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Mah Buckit!
Finland474 Posts
![[image loading]](http://www.wellcoolstuff.com/Merchant2/graphics/00000001/hifeehf19.jpg) | ||
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saritenite
Singapore1680 Posts
Awesome blackmail material | ||
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fnaticNoname
India858 Posts
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KurtistheTurtle
United States1966 Posts
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JohnColtrane
Australia4813 Posts
On August 12 2009 16:59 sArite_nite wrote: Makes an interesting story to tell your friend's kids/girlfriend/wife. Awesome blackmail material you can blackmail someone with jizz tissues? =/ | ||
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omninmo
2349 Posts
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KurtistheTurtle
United States1966 Posts
On August 12 2009 17:41 omninmo wrote: the ants were munch munch munching away on my sweet seed laden sock. even for the internet thats kind of gross | ||
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omninmo
2349 Posts
On August 12 2009 17:46 KurtistheTurtle wrote: even for the internet thats kind of gross naw, yer just squeemish. semen is quite nutritious for the growing ants. + Show Spoiler [semen nutritional data] + Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
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deathgod6
United States5064 Posts
On August 12 2009 17:53 omninmo wrote: naw, yer just squeemish. semen is quite nutritious for the growing ants. + Show Spoiler [semen nutritional data] + Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum. | ||
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JohnColtrane
Australia4813 Posts
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alffla
Hong Kong20321 Posts
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Torenhire
United States11681 Posts
On August 12 2009 17:55 deathgod6 wrote: Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum. omninmo has millions of ant-children out there....somewhere. | ||
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Hypnosis
United States2061 Posts
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Ftrunkz
Australia2474 Posts
On August 12 2009 17:55 deathgod6 wrote: Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum. ... .. ....... You feed your kids your cum? | ||
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Lemonwalrus
United States5465 Posts
I'm so fucking glad that somebody else found that horribly weird. | ||
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BanZu
United States3329 Posts
must be the tiredness | ||
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icystorage
Jollibee19343 Posts
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stroggos
New Zealand1543 Posts
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Ota Solgryn
Denmark2011 Posts
On August 12 2009 16:29 paper wrote: jizzues imo hahaaha.. add to wiki | ||
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omninmo
2349 Posts
On August 12 2009 17:57 JohnColtrane wrote: wtf why put it in a sock just put it in a woman instead because i was 12 years old then. in the following 15 years i managed to "put it in" at least 200 or so women ... mostly chinese | ||
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blue_arrow
1971 Posts
On August 12 2009 18:27 Lemonwalrus wrote: I'm so fucking glad that somebody else found that horribly weird. hey, you can't waste anything in times like these and like he said, it's highly nutritious | ||
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foeffa
Belgium2115 Posts
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Snet
United States3573 Posts
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micronesia
United States24637 Posts
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ChaseR
Norway1004 Posts
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Badjas
Netherlands2038 Posts
seriously aaaaargh jizz tissues. the only thing that would be worse is fresh jizz tissues. + Show Spoiler [well.. one possibly more icky thing] + Our dog once ate out of the potty on which my daughter peed and pooed and threw that up all over the place. that wasn't such a joy to clean up. Neither was cleaning up the dogs face... -_- | ||
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KinosJourney2
Sweden1811 Posts
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Wuewdoodoo
Mexico127 Posts
I can't believe I added to this XD | ||
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ImNotBisu
Canada142 Posts
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Chef
10810 Posts
On August 12 2009 22:12 micronesia wrote: You don't touch tissues that meet that description Chef LOL. Have we just discovered the reason Micronesia doesn't have a girlfriend? "Your rooms a bit messy, Micronesia. Let me just throw out these old tissues for you." ... "Wait, what did you use these tissues for?" "LOL, jizz tissues. You don't touch old tissues that look like that!" The girl leaves. Micronesia sighs, but nature calls and he pulls out his piss bottle from underneath his bed, a former container of apple juice. | ||
Carnivorous Sheep
Baa?21242 Posts
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micronesia
United States24637 Posts
On August 13 2009 02:14 Chef wrote: Have we just discovered the reason Micronesia doesn't have a girlfriend? "Your rooms a bit messy, Micronesia. Let me just throw out these old tissues for you." ... "Wait, what did you use these tissues for?" "LOL, jizz tissues. You don't touch old tissues that look like that!" The girl leaves. Micronesia sighs, but nature calls and he pulls out his piss bottle from underneath his bed, a former container of apple juice. Shit that's basically my life story. No the idea of leaving tissues of that type laying around is grotesque, but I would never chance it and touch somebody's possibly used tissue in a conspicuous place like that. | ||
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ChaseR
Norway1004 Posts
but nature calls and he pulls out his piss bottle from underneath his bed, a former container of apple juice. That sounds like my step-father way back when...ugh. | ||
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CharlieMurphy
United States22895 Posts
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Meth
Canada396 Posts
no one has ever touched anything i've jizzed on, other than the keyboard, but i clean that up. can't leave evidence behind even if they do know i masturbate or not... everyone does it... who doesnt use tissue or toilet paper to clean up the mess? as long as you throw it out, everything'll be okay.. don't leave your jishues lying/drying around for other people to pick up, that's just nasty. | ||
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micronesia
United States24637 Posts
On August 13 2009 08:10 CharlieMurphy wrote: Your friend sucks, on a somewhat related note. I finally finished a game of monopoly the other day with 3 friends. It took us like 1:30 hours and I won! (they even all teamed up on me and pooled their resources). 1:1 monopoly | ||
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Insane Lane
United States397 Posts
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poilord
Germany3252 Posts
You can only hope that the incident was embarrassing enough for him to not leave them lying around the next time. At least they were dried up... | ||
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Grobyc
Canada18410 Posts
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Disregard
China10252 Posts
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