So I was playing Risk, the board game of global domination with 4 of my friends. We're all sitting on the floor on opposite sides of the board and one of my friend's feet hit a soda can causing it to spill on the carpet. Yesterday this happened too. The guy who's room it is, a friend of a friend who I've met 3 or 4 times before, was looking for a tissue. He couldn't really find one, so he's asking everyone to look around them for a paper towel or something to clean it up. No one is saying anything and I'm looking around and I see on his nightstand a couple used tissues. I figure since shit is always being spilt on his floor, that must be what they're there for. I pick one up one or two and hand them to him. Yup. They were his jizz tissues. His fucking dried up used old jizz tissues that he left on his nightstand. Jizz. Tissues.
I put them back and went to the washroom to clean my hands. I stepped in the spilt soda. "Fuck, you might as well use my sock to clean it up." I take off my sock and throw it to him. Jizz tissues.
i used to use a sock to clean up the spunk splash in my formative meatbeat years. for some reason i kept the sock and re-used it; washing it only sparingly. one day my mom and sister found the sock in my drawer- no they werent snooping around but were rather curious why a trail of ants could be found leading from the window sill to my dresser. They found the ants munch munch munching away on my sweet seed laden sock.
Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Fructose sugar
Water
Ascorbic acid (a.k.a., vitamin C)
Citric acid
Enzymes
Protein
Phosphate and bicarbonate buffers (bases)
Zinc
Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum.
Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Fructose sugar
Water
Ascorbic acid (a.k.a., vitamin C)
Citric acid
Enzymes
Protein
Phosphate and bicarbonate buffers (bases)
Zinc
Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum.
omninmo has millions of ant-children out there....somewhere.
Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Fructose sugar
Water
Ascorbic acid (a.k.a., vitamin C)
Citric acid
Enzymes
Protein
Phosphate and bicarbonate buffers (bases)
Zinc
Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum.
Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Fructose sugar
Water
Ascorbic acid (a.k.a., vitamin C)
Citric acid
Enzymes
Protein
Phosphate and bicarbonate buffers (bases)
Zinc
Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum.
...
..
.......
You feed your kids your cum?
I'm so fucking glad that somebody else found that horribly weird.
Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Sperm make up only about 1 percent of your average cumshot while the other 99 percent is made up of the following:
Fructose sugar
Water
Ascorbic acid (a.k.a., vitamin C)
Citric acid
Enzymes
Protein
Phosphate and bicarbonate buffers (bases)
Zinc
Those ants must have been like children to you, seeing as how you were feeding them with your cum.
...
..
.......
You feed your kids your cum?
I'm so fucking glad that somebody else found that horribly weird.
Our dog once ate out of the potty on which my daughter peed and pooed and threw that up all over the place. that wasn't such a joy to clean up. Neither was cleaning up the dogs face... -_-
On August 12 2009 22:12 micronesia wrote: You don't touch tissues that meet that description Chef LOL.
Have we just discovered the reason Micronesia doesn't have a girlfriend?
"Your rooms a bit messy, Micronesia. Let me just throw out these old tissues for you." ... "Wait, what did you use these tissues for?"
"LOL, jizz tissues. You don't touch old tissues that look like that!"
The girl leaves. Micronesia sighs, but nature calls and he pulls out his piss bottle from underneath his bed, a former container of apple juice.
Shit that's basically my life story.
No the idea of leaving tissues of that type laying around is grotesque, but I would never chance it and touch somebody's possibly used tissue in a conspicuous place like that.
Your friend sucks, on a somewhat related note. I finally finished a game of monopoly the other day with 3 friends. It took us like 1:30 hours and I won! (they even all teamed up on me and pooled their resources).
no one has ever touched anything i've jizzed on, other than the keyboard, but i clean that up. can't leave evidence behind even if they do know i masturbate or not...
everyone does it... who doesnt use tissue or toilet paper to clean up the mess? as long as you throw it out, everything'll be okay..
don't leave your jishues lying/drying around for other people to pick up, that's just nasty.
On August 13 2009 08:10 CharlieMurphy wrote: Your friend sucks, on a somewhat related note. I finally finished a game of monopoly the other day with 3 friends. It took us like 1:30 hours and I won! (they even all teamed up on me and pooled their resources).
Where are all the "enjoy your AIDS" comments? You can only hope that the incident was embarrassing enough for him to not leave them lying around the next time. At least they were dried up...