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You seem like a spoiled brat to me. I know this is not really backed up by a lot of evidence, but that's just the feeling I get from reading your post. Also in this society it's a pretty easy bet.
And I am sorry, but cant you understand that your parents after caring and paying for you 19 years long are entitled have a family holiday without their kid constantly being negativ without any good reason?
You're just receving all your live long and you are so selfish that you cannot even give back that little? Disgusting.
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The Adirondacks are fucking gorgeous. I'll go in your place, how's that sound?
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I'm guessing you'd feel differently if you hadn't seen them for years, they had cancer, or maybe they were even dead. Realize that this could will be the case down the line, at some point not of your choosing, and that you better enjoy your time with them now.
No one has perfect parents. Even the parents you think are perfect, their kids have hated them too. The fact that you've even made it to 19 yrs of age and are being invited on a family vacation is enough to show they care about you - to some extent. They fed you (all the while you slung the food back at them), changed your diapers, all 1 million of them (only slight exaggeration, can u tell I have a baby yet?), got up every time you cried (multiple times a night for who knows how long), and although they've screwed up more times than you or they can count, they're your family. They're your parents. Enjoy them while they last. There are many orphans in the world that would give anything to have them, as awful as they are.
All that said, I've been on trips I didn't want to be on. Sometimes it's just best to bite the bullet and have as much fun as you can. You won't regret it in the long run. Good luck, man.
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I guess that is the nice way to phrase it, good job danl9rm.
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I think I will go, this blog was helpful to see things differently
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On July 10 2013 04:47 Race is Terran wrote: I think I will go, this blog was helpful to see things differently gonna recognize this shit...most people just keep defending themselves into oblivion.
Way to actually listen to the responses on your blog. Not super common.
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On July 10 2013 04:57 DamageControL wrote:Show nested quote +On July 10 2013 04:47 Race is Terran wrote: I think I will go, this blog was helpful to see things differently gonna recognize this shit...most people just keep defending themselves into oblivion. Way to actually listen to the responses on your blog. Not super common. Word, admitting to a change in perspective on the internet takes some real gusto. Try and enjoy yourself OP!
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You aren't negative; you're just realistic amongst unreasonably positive. Welcome to The Land of Depression where everyone around you is seeing the world through their optimistic delusions and you are one of the few who was really interested in the reality regardless of it's saddening shape. Don't panic - just embrace it without overthinking, because as long as you stay objective on the facts, it will be you who will end up being right.
And the fact that you love your parents as people who did so much to you doesn't contradict with disliking your parents for the type of character they represent. Figured it out long ago and my relationship with parents suddenly lost 50% of tension.
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On July 10 2013 05:39 wingpawn wrote: You aren't negative; you're just realistic amongst unreasonably positive. Welcome to The Land of Depression where everyone around you is seeing the world through their optimistic delusions and you are one of the few who was really interested in the reality regardless of it's saddening shape. Don't panic - just embrace it without overthinking, because as long as you stay objective on the facts, it will be you who will end up being right.
And the fact that you love your parents as people who did so much to you doesn't contradict with disliking your parents for the type of character they represent. Figured it out long ago and my relationship with parents suddenly lost 50% of tension. This is utter nonsense and borders on solipsistic self-importance of the worst kind. There is nothing special about your perspective on reality; it is just as arbitrary as everyone else's.
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On July 10 2013 05:42 farvacola wrote:Show nested quote +On July 10 2013 05:39 wingpawn wrote: You aren't negative; you're just realistic amongst unreasonably positive. Welcome to The Land of Depression where everyone around you is seeing the world through their optimistic delusions and you are one of the few who was really interested in the reality regardless of it's saddening shape. Don't panic - just embrace it without overthinking, because as long as you stay objective on the facts, it will be you who will end up being right.
And the fact that you love your parents as people who did so much to you doesn't contradict with disliking your parents for the type of character they represent. Figured it out long ago and my relationship with parents suddenly lost 50% of tension. This is utter nonsense and borders on solipsistic self-importance of the worst kind. There is nothing special about your perspective on reality; it is just as arbitrary as everyone else's. Lol yeah he might as well have said: "no one understands me caues im so deep, im the only one that has a realistic view."
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On July 10 2013 05:42 farvacola wrote:Show nested quote +On July 10 2013 05:39 wingpawn wrote: You aren't negative; you're just realistic amongst unreasonably positive. Welcome to The Land of Depression where everyone around you is seeing the world through their optimistic delusions and you are one of the few who was really interested in the reality regardless of it's saddening shape. Don't panic - just embrace it without overthinking, because as long as you stay objective on the facts, it will be you who will end up being right.
And the fact that you love your parents as people who did so much to you doesn't contradict with disliking your parents for the type of character they represent. Figured it out long ago and my relationship with parents suddenly lost 50% of tension. This is utter nonsense and borders on solipsistic self-importance of the worst kind. There is nothing special about your perspective on reality; it is just as arbitrary as everyone else's. Where did I claim there is anything special about it? Everyone can have that perspective if he wanted to but not many people do. It's not special - just rare and makes life little more difficult. On the other hand, it's nothing that one couldn't handle.
But you're almost saying that no reality external to a person really exists? Man, that is THE REAL solipsism.
Besides: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depressive_realism
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On July 10 2013 06:07 wingpawn wrote:Show nested quote +On July 10 2013 05:42 farvacola wrote:On July 10 2013 05:39 wingpawn wrote: You aren't negative; you're just realistic amongst unreasonably positive. Welcome to The Land of Depression where everyone around you is seeing the world through their optimistic delusions and you are one of the few who was really interested in the reality regardless of it's saddening shape. Don't panic - just embrace it without overthinking, because as long as you stay objective on the facts, it will be you who will end up being right.
And the fact that you love your parents as people who did so much to you doesn't contradict with disliking your parents for the type of character they represent. Figured it out long ago and my relationship with parents suddenly lost 50% of tension. This is utter nonsense and borders on solipsistic self-importance of the worst kind. There is nothing special about your perspective on reality; it is just as arbitrary as everyone else's. Where did I claim there is anything special about it? Everyone can have that perspective if he wanted to but not many people do. It's not special - just rare and makes life little more difficult. On the other hand, it's nothing that one couldn't handle. But you're almost saying that no reality external to a person really exists? Man, that is THE REAL solipsism. Besides: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depressive_realism You seem to misunderstand the definition of special, so allow me to help you out. Special has it's roots in the latin term specialis, which means individual or particular. You are suggesting that a select few (or rare) individuals are privy to a particular view of the world that is "more real" than those held by others, and that it is necessarily a depressing perspective. This is not true, by any stretch of the imagination, and to suggest otherwise is to subordinate the views of anyone who disagrees with you.
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plus you are motivating him to be a depressed realist? sound advice.
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On July 10 2013 02:35 Race is Terran wrote: Well thisi has given me things to think about, such as it is an opportunity to go someplaces for free all paid expenses.
I still am not sure about the spending time with my family part though, in the past, it has been a difficult issue that I've had to suck up and do. It doesn't feel like "family", it feels more like being obligated to do certain things for them because they put me into this world
edit: My parents and I although we believe in unconditional love, they tend to rope tiny little conditions to it, like the smallprint in a contract that you just kinda gloss over and then realize the stuff in small print was actually a very important condition of the agreement
Dude, I'm sorry, but you sound like an incredibly spoiled brat and an entitled prick. You have yet to offer one solid reason as to why you don't like to spend time with your parents.
Your parents give you fantastic vacations and all you can say is that your time is more valuable. You really need to evaluate yourself. Is there a legitimate reason that you don't like to spend time with the folks? Do they argue a lot? Are they total buzz-kills? Are they horrible people? Have they completely let you down or wronged you in multiple ways in the past so that you don't trust/like them anymore? If it's merely a matter of being kind of bored on your trips, then engage them. You're a fucking adult. Talk to them and say, "Hey, X sounds kind of boring, and I don't want us to sit in a hotel for a large chunk of our trip being bored. Let's find another thing to do while we're there." Your parents are reaching out to you by offering you fantastic things.
By the sound of it, you had a fairly privileged life (correct me if I'm wrong), and you may still be living with them. And yet you merely feel like it's a chore to do anything with them. That is the definition of "entitled" and "spoiled". This "obligation" you feel is merely a consequence of your own attitude and outlook, and it sounds like your parents were 100% right; you do have a negative attitude. You need to be assertive in fixing that attitude so you can start enjoying time with your parents, and if you can't do that because you "Just don't like them" for no particularly compelling reason, then I'm sorry, but you're just a terrible person.
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On July 10 2013 06:16 farvacola wrote: You are suggesting that a select few (or rare) individuals are privy to a particular view of the world that is "more real" than those held by others, and that it is necessarily a depressing perspective. Bolded part: yes, I'm suggesting it because it's true - some people are indeed more delusional than others.
Non-bolded part: no, you're missing my point. The reason realism is depressive is not within the realism itself; it within countless other people who are absurdly optimistic, then get beaten down by the real course of events only to remain optimistic or even gain more optimism. This is nothing to be envied, because it's plainly stupid. Especially when the difference between their perception of reality and the reality itself causes any sort of damage on other people.
The depressive realism perspective isn't necessarily true... until the chain of events proves it true. I agree that sometimes reality might proved it false, though I will still argue than most of the times, grain-of-salt realism will end up being more accurate.
PS. Sorry @Race is Terran for derailing your blog a bit. I'm going offline now.
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On July 10 2013 06:26 Stratos_speAr wrote:Show nested quote +On July 10 2013 02:35 Race is Terran wrote: Well thisi has given me things to think about, such as it is an opportunity to go someplaces for free all paid expenses.
I still am not sure about the spending time with my family part though, in the past, it has been a difficult issue that I've had to suck up and do. It doesn't feel like "family", it feels more like being obligated to do certain things for them because they put me into this world
edit: My parents and I although we believe in unconditional love, they tend to rope tiny little conditions to it, like the smallprint in a contract that you just kinda gloss over and then realize the stuff in small print was actually a very important condition of the agreement Dude, I'm sorry, but you sound like an incredibly spoiled brat and an entitled prick. You have yet to offer one solid reason as to why you don't like to spend time with your parents. Your parents give you fantastic vacations and all you can say is that your time is more valuable. You really need to evaluate yourself. Is there a legitimate reason that you don't like to spend time with the folks? Do they argue a lot? Are they total buzz-kills? Are they horrible people? Have they completely let you down or wronged you in multiple ways in the past so that you don't trust/like them anymore? If it's merely a matter of being kind of bored on your trips, then engage them. You're a fucking adult. Talk to them and say, "Hey, X sounds kind of boring, and I don't want us to sit in a hotel for a large chunk of our trip being bored. Let's find another thing to do while we're there." Your parents are reaching out to you by offering you fantastic things. By the sound of it, you had a fairly privileged life (correct me if I'm wrong), and you may still be living with them. And yet you merely feel like it's a chore to do anything with them. That is the definition of "entitled" and "spoiled". This "obligation" you feel is merely a consequence of your own attitude and outlook, and it sounds like your parents were 100% right; you do have a negative attitude. You need to be assertive in fixing that attitude so you can start enjoying time with your parents, and if you can't do that because you "Just don't like them" for no particularly compelling reason, then I'm sorry, but you're just a terrible person.
For someone who admittedly doesn't have a clue, you're awfully fucking rude.
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Just picking on you because you were the last of at least three posters to say "You're a spoiled fucking brat.. blah blah blah.. you haven't said why.." going on to assume things he hasn't said.
Oh hey look the edit button. Woops. In any case, what you know is the kid doesn't like hanging out with his parents. He feels an obligation towards them for certain things. Hey, I feel obligated to do shit with my parents too. That's why I moved half way across the country.
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