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On December 04 2008 04:52 xiaofan wrote: my first dance i talked about starcraft most of the night she blogged about how much of a shitty dancer i was and what a bad time she had
lolwut ><
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There was a rumor that in middle school our choir teacher had sex with some girls so he left that year or something.
And this one kid in AP english talked about some restaurant called the Glory Hole, lmao
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On December 04 2008 04:36 Haemonculus wrote: This didn't technically happen *at* school, because we were out to lunch during at the time, but I asked the waiter at the restaurant to violate my parking ticket.
Probably one of the most embarrassing things I've done in public not-intentionally.
you, sir, have a disappointing life.
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On December 02 2008 15:12 Fontong wrote:
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In like 9th or 10th grade I used to piss all over one of the stairwells at my school cause I was a hard ass. One time a group of like 5 girls started walking up the stairs while I was hosing down the banister and walls, hilarity ensued. We had really low ceilings in the stairwell so all they saw was was this penis spraying the walls, and then the penis turning and running upstairs. I flew up the stairs, tucking it away as fast as I could with minimal piss splashing, and ran through the gym and ran into my next class as fast as I could.
The next day they were randomly pulling guys from the "special" class right next door to the stairwell for questioning. Good times.
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United States17042 Posts
On December 04 2008 08:02 Roxen000 wrote:Show nested quote +On December 04 2008 04:52 xiaofan wrote: my first dance i talked about starcraft most of the night she blogged about how much of a shitty dancer i was and what a bad time she had lolwut ><
it happens, don't get discouraged. At some point, you'll find a girl that will listen. maybe.
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In middle school, an asshole kept provoking me to hit him so I just pushed him a little bit and he fell down to the floor, crying like a little girl. The next morning, the vice principal called me in and asked me why I was being a bully.
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Once I was 9 years old and I was in school when this happened.
We wear school uniforms here so my shorts were kinda assed. They were a little too big for me and the buckle on occasion would just come off.
So one day during math class, the teacher was teaching us some new topic and he was using the old-fashioned projector that uses a light and you need transparencies. He called for a volunteer to come up and explain something on the screen.
I happily volunteered and not to my knowledge, my buckle came off. That's not too bad usually because it always happens but this time. I FUCKING FORGOT TO ZIP MY PANTS.
So I walked up to the front and everyone gave me this weird ass look. This girl who sat in front of the class pointed toward my little buddy and laughed. GOSH MAN.
Then the teacher joked that I was so excited to come up to explain till my pants dropped.
-_- Thank goodness I was only 9 back then. WHEW.
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I had just transferred from private school to public school during my Junior year of high school. Before I transferred I spoke with the soccer coach (along with basketball and baseball coaches) to play for the school who were ecstatic to have me. Soccer practice began a month before the first day of classes (organized by the players with the coaches present) and I would be a walk on for varsity. Now, I lived in a fairly rich (collar popped) neighborhood in Connecticut, having moved from Newark, New Jersey which was a bit of a culture shock. I hated this school the moment I set eyes on these little spoiled brats with egos twice the size of themselves. And likewise, they hated me, being the new guy from a poor background, a walk on, and most likely taking the starting position as goalie from everyone's best bud some whiny senior who was almost a foot shorter than me, we'll call him Steve. They gave me shit which I think stemmed from Steve's insecurities, I took it, and during a scrimmage while I was playing defense a kid had tried to grab my balls as the offense was setting up and I was defending him and I knocked him out and got kicked off the team. Kids at my school were fucking weird. Anyways, about a month after school began I mostly kept to myself. I had class with one of Steven's friends (another soccer player) who warmed up to me and while I would never consider us friends, he kept me entertained. He invited me to one of his parties while his parents were out. I decided to go with a couple friends from home. The party was pretty good. I smoked before I came, they had some beirut going on and some other stupid beer drinking games, didn't care much for it. There was probably over 100 people there, a good portion of the upperclassmen. I drank a bit, talked to a bunch of people and watched as Steve was agitated that I was there. I never cared too much for the girls at my school. They were hot, but wouldn't last a night with me (attention whores, drama queens etc.). During the party three hot girls came up to me and my friends and we started talking, cracking jokes and ripping on Steve and his buds (one of the girls was Steve's girlfriend whom we'll call Sue). Well, Sue apparently had a crush on me, and as the night went on began flirting with me as Steve was too into throwing pingpong balls into a cup not even realizing where his girl was at. Well, eventually Sue had enough of the party and with some alcohol in her decided to bring me to Steve's friend's parents bedroom (she knew the way in this big fucking house, made me wonder). Anyways, we hooked up and before I knew it, she began giving me head. Now this where it gets a bit fucked. We had been up there about fifteen minutes and according to my friends people began to wonder, and someone just made the connection that both of us were gone. Steve began to panic and get angry and him and his friends started to call Sue who turned off her phone after seeing who it was. Well, I was about ready to finish up and right at that moment, Steve with a crowd of people wedged in the hallway trying to see what was going on, opened the door. Sue jerked her head to turn around, and while doing so pointed my dick to where she was looking at and at that moment my spunk nailed Steve's already furiously red face. And for about 10 long fucking seconds there was silence before I started cracking up, told him to go clean himself up you look like a mess and Steve ran away with Sue repeating omg omg omg who promptly ran after him. I zipped up and left and Steven never looked me in the eyes again.
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Holy shit, it shot that far? Hilarious story bro - surprised you didn't get beat up afterward.
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On December 20 2008 03:00 pirate cod wrote: I had just transferred from private school to public school during my Junior year of high school. Before I transferred I spoke with the soccer coach (along with basketball and baseball coaches) to play for the school who were ecstatic to have me. Soccer practice began a month before the first day of classes (organized by the players with the coaches present) and I would be a walk on for varsity. Now, I lived in a fairly rich (collar popped) neighborhood in Connecticut, having moved from Newark, New Jersey which was a bit of a culture shock. I hated this school the moment I set eyes on these little spoiled brats with egos twice the size of themselves. And likewise, they hated me, being the new guy from a poor background, a walk on, and most likely taking the starting position as goalie from everyone's best bud some whiny senior who was almost a foot shorter than me, we'll call him Steve. They gave me shit which I think stemmed from Steve's insecurities, I took it, and during a scrimmage while I was playing defense a kid had tried to grab my balls as the offense was setting up and I was defending him and I knocked him out and got kicked off the team. Kids at my school were fucking weird. Anyways, about a month after school began I mostly kept to myself. I had class with one of Steven's friends (another soccer player) who warmed up to me and while I would never consider us friends, he kept me entertained. He invited me to one of his parties while his parents were out. I decided to go with a couple friends from home. The party was pretty good. I smoked before I came, they had some beirut going on and some other stupid beer drinking games, didn't care much for it. There was probably over 100 people there, a good portion of the upperclassmen. I drank a bit, talked to a bunch of people and watched as Steve was agitated that I was there. I never cared too much for the girls at my school. They were hot, but wouldn't last a night with me (attention whores, drama queens etc.). During the party three hot girls came up to me and my friends and we started talking, cracking jokes and ripping on Steve and his buds (one of the girls was Steve's girlfriend whom we'll call Sue). Well, Sue apparently had a crush on me, and as the night went on began flirting with me as Steve was too into throwing pingpong balls into a cup not even realizing where his girl was at. Well, eventually Sue had enough of the party and with some alcohol in her decided to bring me to Steve's friend's parents bedroom (she knew the way in this big fucking house, made me wonder). Anyways, we hooked up and before I knew it, she began giving me head. Now this where it gets a bit fucked. We had been up there about fifteen minutes and according to my friends people began to wonder, and someone just made the connection that both of us were gone. Steve began to panic and get angry and him and his friends started to call Sue who turned off her phone after seeing who it was. Well, I was about ready to finish up and right at that moment, Steve with a crowd of people wedged in the hallway trying to see what was going on, opened the door. Sue jerked her head to turn around, and while doing so pointed my dick to where she was looking at and at that moment my spunk nailed Steve's already furiously red face. And for about 10 long fucking seconds there was silence before I started cracking up, told him to go clean himself up you look like a mess and Steve ran away with Sue repeating omg omg omg who promptly ran after him. I zipped up and left and Steven never looked me in the eyes again.
Not to be jerk, but I don't believe this story for a sec. Starts off real, then turns into fantasy.
Let's think this out. You're going to get blown. Now, you don't need a bed for this, but 9 times out of ten you're going to move close to the bed anyway. Which is almost certainly way too far from the door for you to ejaculate on some guys face. And even if you don't go to the bed, you're not going to be squeezed up next the door. And even if Steve is foot shorter than you, he's still got a huge height advantage on your dick. Can you really ejaculate THAT far and THAT high. And have it just happend to hit the guy in the face? I could see it being possible... but so unlikely. I mean you lose power even halfway thru your ejaculation if stimulation stops. And unless you were past the point of no return, I think your ejaculation would've been a joke. She stops sucking your dick, you see a guy who beat you out for goalie... not exactly sexy shit.
Plus, when someone walks in on you naked the normal reaction is to cover up and hide your shit.
After my above scientific analysis: Steve beat your ass up.
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yea sounds like a real story with some exaggeration thrown in, who cares though lol.
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On December 20 2008 03:36 -_- wrote:Show nested quote +On December 20 2008 03:00 pirate cod wrote: I had just transferred from private school to public school during my Junior year of high school. Before I transferred I spoke with the soccer coach (along with basketball and baseball coaches) to play for the school who were ecstatic to have me. Soccer practice began a month before the first day of classes (organized by the players with the coaches present) and I would be a walk on for varsity. Now, I lived in a fairly rich (collar popped) neighborhood in Connecticut, having moved from Newark, New Jersey which was a bit of a culture shock. I hated this school the moment I set eyes on these little spoiled brats with egos twice the size of themselves. And likewise, they hated me, being the new guy from a poor background, a walk on, and most likely taking the starting position as goalie from everyone's best bud some whiny senior who was almost a foot shorter than me, we'll call him Steve. They gave me shit which I think stemmed from Steve's insecurities, I took it, and during a scrimmage while I was playing defense a kid had tried to grab my balls as the offense was setting up and I was defending him and I knocked him out and got kicked off the team. Kids at my school were fucking weird. Anyways, about a month after school began I mostly kept to myself. I had class with one of Steven's friends (another soccer player) who warmed up to me and while I would never consider us friends, he kept me entertained. He invited me to one of his parties while his parents were out. I decided to go with a couple friends from home. The party was pretty good. I smoked before I came, they had some beirut going on and some other stupid beer drinking games, didn't care much for it. There was probably over 100 people there, a good portion of the upperclassmen. I drank a bit, talked to a bunch of people and watched as Steve was agitated that I was there. I never cared too much for the girls at my school. They were hot, but wouldn't last a night with me (attention whores, drama queens etc.). During the party three hot girls came up to me and my friends and we started talking, cracking jokes and ripping on Steve and his buds (one of the girls was Steve's girlfriend whom we'll call Sue). Well, Sue apparently had a crush on me, and as the night went on began flirting with me as Steve was too into throwing pingpong balls into a cup not even realizing where his girl was at. Well, eventually Sue had enough of the party and with some alcohol in her decided to bring me to Steve's friend's parents bedroom (she knew the way in this big fucking house, made me wonder). Anyways, we hooked up and before I knew it, she began giving me head. Now this where it gets a bit fucked. We had been up there about fifteen minutes and according to my friends people began to wonder, and someone just made the connection that both of us were gone. Steve began to panic and get angry and him and his friends started to call Sue who turned off her phone after seeing who it was. Well, I was about ready to finish up and right at that moment, Steve with a crowd of people wedged in the hallway trying to see what was going on, opened the door. Sue jerked her head to turn around, and while doing so pointed my dick to where she was looking at and at that moment my spunk nailed Steve's already furiously red face. And for about 10 long fucking seconds there was silence before I started cracking up, told him to go clean himself up you look like a mess and Steve ran away with Sue repeating omg omg omg who promptly ran after him. I zipped up and left and Steven never looked me in the eyes again.
Not to be jerk, but I don't believe this story for a sec. Starts off real, then turns into fantasy. Let's think this out. You're going to get blown. Now, you don't need a bed for this, but 9 times out of ten you're going to move close to the bed anyway. Which is almost certainly way too far from the door for you to ejaculate on some guys face. And even if you don't go to the bed, you're not going to be squeezed up next the door. And even if Steve is foot shorter than you, he's still got a huge height advantage on your dick. Can you really ejaculate THAT far and THAT high. And have it just happend to hit the guy in the face? I could see it being possible... but so unlikely. I mean you lose power even halfway thru your ejaculation if stimulation stops. And unless you were past the point of no return, I think your ejaculation would've been a joke. She stops sucking your dick, you see a guy who beat you out for goalie... not exactly sexy shit. Plus, when someone walks in on you naked the normal reaction is to cover up and hide your shit. After my above scientific analysis: Steve beat your ass up.
On a good day I can probably hit the door from 5+ feet...
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My sympathies to you, for having to live in Newark. That place is hooooooood
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On December 20 2008 03:36 -_- wrote:
After my above scientific analysis: Steve beat your ass up.
Don't fuck with Steve.
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When i was like 7 i was making this huge snowman outside or some shit. Then when it was time to take my snowpants off i went inside and my coat hook was right beside the water fountain where all the cool kids were. I went to pull down my snowpants but i definitely pulled everything down and got to show my 7 ear old weiner to all the older kids. Was awesome.
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-In public school I was giving a presentation about my trip to florida, and i was telling how I stayed in her condiminium and instead of saying condiminuim I said condum.
-My teacher asked me to name the 3 F's involved in Canadian trade. I wasn't listening and only heard name the F's. She picked me out and said "whats one of the F's you can say it here". Then I said FUCK.
-It was after a school play, and I was reading a card full of thank you's out to the audience full of parents and teachers (into a mic). I mispronounced a word and said "fuck" into the mic before i caught myself .
-We were doing a quiz in Physics, and the teacher was saying how she would take off 1 question. So I asked, "so if we already did that does that mean there BONERmarks." Whole class laughed :S
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Lol awesome bump, loved it! Btw Steve can't beat him up because he's a foot shorter than him
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Lol Nrg
In High school in my bio class there was a person talking in the back of the class some huge guy, so the teacher said : "Sir plz stop talking plz". Then me and my friends who where near that guy started laughting, the teacher didnt understood why we were laughting cause, the guy he just asked to stop talking was a girl !!! But i must say she really looked like a boy with her mustache.
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On December 20 2008 05:07 NrG.NeverExpo wrote: When i was like 7 i was making this huge snowman outside or some shit. Then when it was time to take my snowpants off i went inside and my coat hook was right beside the water fountain where all the cool kids were. I went to pull down my snowpants but i definitely pulled everything down and got to show my 7 ear old weiner to all the older kids. Was awesome. LOL hahahahaahahahahahha
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