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Story About a Zergling - Page 3

Blogs > Chef
Post a Reply
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Ideas
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
United States8147 Posts
July 21 2009 04:02 GMT
#41
Zerg have low empathy levels?
Free Palestine
evanthebouncy!
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States12796 Posts
July 21 2009 08:22 GMT
#42
yeah I'd try to revise the "fuck" out of the story
It is abit too strong for it. It's like you're trying to make a nice ice tea then you dump some chili pepper into it.

I have no rpboem with swears it just doesn't seem to fit.

Other than that it's a nice cute story <3
Life is run, it is dance, it is fast, passionate and BAM!, you dance and sing and booze while you can for now is the time and time is mine. Smile and laugh when still can for now is the time and soon you die!
Chef
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
10810 Posts
July 21 2009 18:02 GMT
#43
Generally I agree. Although it wasn't contrived (I was just transposing real thoughts into a fantasy universe) most people in my audience didn't get it/like it and therefore it should be changed.

But artistically I disagree for the same reasons. It might take a certain knowledge of psychology, or rare personal experience to understand why it fits perfectly, but it's quite literal. I would be altering the only part that is realistic to make it fit with what people think realistic should be (which of course is fantasy). I could explain in detail, but only if you ask.
LEGEND!! LEGEND!!
Ideas
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
United States8147 Posts
July 21 2009 20:52 GMT
#44
I vote dont change it
Free Palestine
7mk
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Germany10157 Posts
July 22 2009 12:15 GMT
#45
Don't change anything

Personally I was surprised people were surprised about it - I also thought it fit perfectly, even though I probably don't quite understand it - at least not in the way you do,
just like I generally don't understand all of your story - I don't think I even want to, I have my own interpretation of it - but I love it.
beep boop
EEEE1234
Profile Joined June 2009
Canada55 Posts
July 24 2009 02:46 GMT
#46
Zerglings can be cute...if you like monsters, that is.
지지이이이이이이이이이이이
Sky
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
Jordan812 Posts
July 24 2009 03:45 GMT
#47
The brave new world of Starcraft.

Interesting.
...jumping into cold water whenever I get the chance.
food
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States1951 Posts
July 24 2009 03:56 GMT
#48
"dont fuck" is a pinch of salt that is always needed to make it good
decent story considering you had to base it off sc
read it to the end since youve made somewhats an impression before with the attitude in some posts
Can someone ban this guy please? FA?
Jonoman92
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States9104 Posts
July 24 2009 07:43 GMT
#49
So this is what goes through a zergling's mind as it is ruthlessly consumed by a defiler for the greater cause of the Overmind.
hazelynut
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States2196 Posts
July 24 2009 08:20 GMT
#50
On July 22 2009 03:02 Chef wrote:
Generally I agree. Although it wasn't contrived (I was just transposing real thoughts into a fantasy universe) most people in my audience didn't get it/like it and therefore it should be changed.


I thought the "Zerglings don't fuck" added a perfect sense of something (realism? despair? cruel realization?) to the piece, and I would argue that it became that much stronger and evocative because people don't get it. Startling your reader into disagreeing, and more importantly thinking, is all part of good literature.
Zerg | life of lively to live to life of full life thx to shield battery | www.cstarleague.com <3
Corrupt
Profile Joined August 2009
Bulgaria1312 Posts
August 15 2009 15:53 GMT
#51
Touching.
Just a guy trying to enjoy living in the worst timeline and failing miserably since 1990.
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