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On May 08 2012 02:11 ShoCkeyy wrote:
I don't think I'm ready for a kid or am I?
I'm not really sure anyone is ever ready for it. But when it happens, priorities change and I'm sure you can find a way to make it work. I believe a child should always be considered a gift and not just something you "decide" to have.
Also, consider this; what if you really are sterile (or perhaps just have really low probability of having a child) and it actually is something of a "miracle" as you put it. What if you decide to get rid of it and then it turns out you wont be able to have children together at the time you feel "ready".
Then again, I am not you and we probably view things differently... It's just some things to think about.
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good luck is all i can say
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You should see another doctor to see if you're really sterile, not ask directly a dna test of your girlfriend cuz if you're not, it will hit her hard tt
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On May 08 2012 03:36 wwJd)El_Mojjo wrote:Show nested quote +On May 08 2012 02:11 ShoCkeyy wrote:
I don't think I'm ready for a kid or am I? I'm not really sure anyone is ever ready for it. But when it happens, priorities change and I'm sure you can find a way to make it work. I believe a child should always be considered a gift and not just something you "decide" to have. Also, consider this; what if you really are sterile (or perhaps just have really low probability of having a child) and it actually is something of a "miracle" as you put it. What if you decide to get rid of it and then it turns out you wont be able to have children together at the time you feel "ready". Then again, I am not you and we probably view things differently... It's just some things to think about.
I've thought about this many times. What if this is my only chance to have a kid? :\ Thanks for all the responses though, they all seem great. I just hope we make the correct decision.
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tupac's coming back!
on a serious note, i think you should do a paternity test... miracles happen, but so do accidents 
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On May 08 2012 02:28 ShoCkeyy wrote:Show nested quote +On May 08 2012 02:27 Murlox wrote:
Since you are publicaly sharing this information, I must raise the following point : are you certain this embryo is yours ? If you're sterile ?
This is not a very nice comment toi make, but it's probably better to think about that NOW, than in 18 years. I've thought about this, but it's impossible. She's not that kind of person ever since I've met her in the 9th grade. Also, we're always together. Only time when we're not together is during work hours. She works as a waitress at applebees, trying to get her hospitality degree and I'm a web developer.
There's no such thing as "not that kind of person", not trying to be a jackass here, but if you were told you were sterile there's probably exams backing up that statement. Did they test you with a spermiogram when they diagnosed you with infertility? Medical tests can always have a false positive so it's not out of the question, but you should ask her anyways.
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You need to go get a fertility test. Dont asume youre sterile just because a doctor told you so.
Ive been to hospital twice after two seperate accidents and told i had no breaks, and both times later found out i had broken bones. I even saw the xray for one the second time and even i could see the break. Doctors make mistakes (or in the case of one of mine, downright incompetent)
The pill isnt 100% perfect even if the missus remembers to take it same time every day, so if youre not shooting blanks you wont be the first guy to knock a girl up whos on the pill. Dont say anything to the missus, just go for a fertility test. If your fertile the pergnancy was a accident and shit mappens, if youre sterile the missus has awkward questions to answer
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At least you are smart about it and know you can't support a child given your scenario. Going for the abortion is a smart choice.
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On May 08 2012 02:24 ShoCkeyy wrote:Show nested quote +On May 08 2012 02:21 Apom wrote:
Something escapes me. You are not yet in a position to properly support and raise a child. You are both in your studies. You already had a "scare" in the (recent, I assume) past. And you kept having unprotected sex ? What were you thinking ? Actually, I'm suppose to be sterile and she's on birth control, the daily kind. So it's basically really weird on how this happened. I have a thing called http://kidshealth.org/teen/sexual_health/guys/varicocele.html, it doesn't leave you sterile unless doctors say other wise, which is what they told me. Guess they were wrong? And the birth control failed some how. So this baby is like a miracle baby of some sort. I wouldn't know. Sorry I left this part out of the blog, I was just typing away with out really thinking.
Or it's not yours...
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I dunno. Something is not adding up. Sterile + Pill = pregnant? Not likely, unless one of you two messed up.
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On May 08 2012 03:45 ShoCkeyy wrote:Show nested quote +On May 08 2012 03:36 wwJd)El_Mojjo wrote:On May 08 2012 02:11 ShoCkeyy wrote:
I don't think I'm ready for a kid or am I? I'm not really sure anyone is ever ready for it. But when it happens, priorities change and I'm sure you can find a way to make it work. I believe a child should always be considered a gift and not just something you "decide" to have. Also, consider this; what if you really are sterile (or perhaps just have really low probability of having a child) and it actually is something of a "miracle" as you put it. What if you decide to get rid of it and then it turns out you wont be able to have children together at the time you feel "ready". Then again, I am not you and we probably view things differently... It's just some things to think about. I've thought about this many times. What if this is my only chance to have a kid? :\ Thanks for all the responses though, they all seem great. I just hope we make the correct decision.
You will make the right decision if you talk about it openly with your partner, and think about things objectively, and at least try to push your emotional side away to think things through rationally. There is no right or wrong in this situation IMO, since people are different and different decisions make you happy than some others. Some would be in ruins for having a baby at your age. Some will be happier.
As long as you're able to think it through with your partner, both of you are at a consensus of what you're going to do, then that is all that is necessary, regardless of what choice you make. Just be sure to have no regrets. Consider what makes YOU the happiest. As long as you know that the path you choose is ultimately going to make you the happiest, take it.
Like some have said, a child is a matter or priorities among many other things. By having the child you must understand that most of your free time will be washed away. Being at school while having a kid is probably possible, but will be very demanding mentally. (depending on financial situation etc ofc)
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On May 08 2012 04:17 Zidane wrote:
I dunno. Something is not adding up. Sterile + Pill = pregnant? Not likely, unless one of you two messed up.
People don't get it...
Pill isn't 100% fool-proof.
Varicocele sterility isn't 100% either, although I believe OP can probably sue the doctor that told him this(provided the child is indeed his).
Hell, not even condoms are 100%. It doesn't matter which method you use, the chance exists.
And I feel sorry for you OP. Having to choose between having the child at this point of life, or losing the "miracle" and not have the chance when you grow older is indeed a problem. Hope you can live well with whatever decision you have.
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Bro, i know how it feels to have a baby early in your life, i myself become a father when i was 17 years old, my girlfriend was only 16 years old, but this kid changed my life, altho we were young we lived it through and it wasnt that hard, first years could be rough but then we graduated schools, i went to become a military officer while my wife is now owner of one of the bigest Logistics companies in my Country, i doubt we would have what we have today if not becouse of that baby.
P.S english
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Kind of weird how you talk about your best friend dying and hoping that he would be reincarnated into your unborn child....\
Then I read your previous blog and your best friend was your dog... Awkward.
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So either you're not infertile or she cheated.
Get a fertility test and hope that the result is that you are actually fertile. If you still aren't then that makes things look kinda bleak for your relationship. Even though you're still not 100% sure.
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On May 08 2012 04:29 Zephirdd wrote:Show nested quote +On May 08 2012 04:17 Zidane wrote:
I dunno. Something is not adding up. Sterile + Pill = pregnant? Not likely, unless one of you two messed up. People don't get it... Pill isn't 100% fool-proof. Varicocele sterility isn't 100% either, although I believe OP can probably sue the doctor that told him this(provided the child is indeed his). Hell, not even condoms are 100%. It doesn't matter which method you use, the chance exists. And I feel sorry for you OP. Having to choose between having the child at this point of life, or losing the "miracle" and not have the chance when you grow older is indeed a problem. Hope you can live well with whatever decision you have.
The post you quoted said 'unless one of [those] two messed up'.
Most of the flaws in contraception use come from the user messing up.
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Wow Crazy, same kind of thing happend to me a little while back, (Minus being sterile). Found out my girlfreind wasnt taking her pill right AFTER a preg scare. The thought of having a baby scared me so much because I knew I wouldnt be morally able to abort the baby. Then I started thinking about if she would be crazy enough to just go without me to the abortion clinic, what could I do to stop this? The answer was nothing and all these thoughts were scary enough for me to stop sleeping with her. Arguments on the subject put too much strain on the relationship and eventually we broke up. If your first "scare" was anything like mine im surprised you continued to have sex, almost seems like you wanted to have a child.......
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On May 08 2012 04:31 DomiNater wrote:
Kind of weird how you talk about your best friend dying and hoping that he would be reincarnated into your unborn child....\
Then I read your previous blog and your best friend was your dog... Awkward.
LOL
Nice find. Maybe abortion is the best course of action here.
Also, whoever thinks that this is just a situational decision is mistaken. I will go further and say that OP has already undermined his relationship by telling the girl that w/e she decides he will support instead of trying to keep the baby. She will never forget that. I've seen relationships ruined this way. What kind of a man will want his woman to get rid of their baby? I'm not saying it is fair, but this is what goes through potential mother's mind. By making this choice you're not only ending the pregnancy, you're very likely to end your relationship with this woman in the near future (or never experience the same level of trust and commitment as before).
But first sort through the mess. At least try to make sure you two are honest and the baby is yours. It might influence your decision.
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On May 08 2012 04:50 Brandisimo wrote:
If your first "scare" was anything like mine im surprised you continued to have sex, almost seems like you wanted to have a child.......
what kind of logic is this
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Wait you had a previous scare right? What did you do that time? Did you get yourself checked out or just happy nothing happened.
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EPT
