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Today i recieved my 6 week grading period progress report in the mail for my first semester as a junior in high school. The grades were the worst i've recieved throughout my entire high school courier. (keep in mind this is a progress report, and not the report card, the report card comes in 18 weeks, i just got my first 6 week progress report). This time in my honors gov class, i did bad on an essay which dragged my grade from an A to a C, and it happened to show as a C on the progress repot. I also got many B's because i haven't gotten time to study for those classes due to the hard amount of honors courses im taking.
Basically i got home my dad looked at this report, and in disgust took out his belt and started whipping me. Fortunatly i had my sweater on so it minimizes the pain. He also give attempts to slap my face, but all of his throws are blocked by my arm, and as a result my right and left arm becames red and swollen. He also threw "light punches/kicks" towards my stomach area, which was also blocked by my arms. I believe if it was an actual punch/kick i wouldn't of been able to block it.
My dad had a history of beating me even as a child. One of my most memorabl memories was when i was still in china and around the age of 5 I believe, i accidently spilled a cup of milk, and he furiously kicked me down and kicked/rolled my body with his foot. I've been beaten by him SEVERAL TIMES, and each time he does it, it makes me stronger. As a teen of 17 now, i've managed to develop a strong mentality to take those, but today was different....
He pushed me on the sofa, and used his belt to whip my arms and upper torso, i actually couldn't careless. What disgusted me was when he spat on me, and blew his nose on me as I was down on the sofa. He didn't even do it once, he did it NUMEROUS times. The first time he's ever done that was when i was in 7th grade, and i got a 73% on a math test. I sorta just sucked it up, but now i think i've had enough. He's reached my barrier to the point i can no longer stand.
I want to move out. I dont know how, or if my actions will only be selfish. My mom and sister are both loving and caring, and i dont want to ditch them for my own benefits. I've thought about walking to y city's city hall is about 3-4 miles away, i can walk there if i wanted to and ask for help. However something deep in my mind tells me to just stay.
I have never publicly revealed this, i've only told it to a few friends, but now i think i'm going to let it loose. Often times i've replaced this abuse with the word "scold", but what im experiencing isn't a disciplinary scold.
Here is my other parental issue blog: http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?topic_id=78488
I've made a life goal to stop the child abuse to my generation of children.
PS: If my parents finds out i still play SC, and browse TL. the consequences would be even worth.
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Fight back. Tell him if he wants to fight you, it must be to the death. Is he willing? (In other words, let him bite off more than he can chew)
If my Dad tried to beat me, I'd try my damnedest to fight back with as much fiery mongrel in me as I could muster. You have a lot more to teach your dad than he does you. Violence is fucking dumb. Not to sound like a pussy, but there's a particular trend with people using violence when they feel their words aren't adequate enough to solve the problem.
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GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!
That's all I have to say. I had to come out of lurking just to say that.
Good luck.
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Talk to the counselors in school, or a teacher you're really close to.
Notify the situation, and they'll help you for sure.
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Austin10831 Posts
You're 17 years old now, you shouldn't put up with that at all. I know people talk about Asian parents and ridiculous traditions, but his ways don't have to be your ways.
Next time you're alone with him, take off your belt and slap it across something to get his attention. When he's looking at you, stare him down and say calmly, "Next time you take your belt to me, you'll be met with much more than defence."
Or something equally ominous or badass.
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On October 10 2008 13:49 SiZ.FaNtAsY wrote:
Talk to the counselors in school, or a teacher you're really close to.
Notify the situation, and they'll help you for sure.
This. What your dad is doing to you is insane. Don't take it.
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CA10824 Posts
that isn't normal, even for "asian parent" standard. usually asian parents would hit your a couple times with a stick/rule/belt and that would be the end of it.
idk man, tough decision on your part.  i hope you do the right thing
stay strong!
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Braavos36362 Posts
if i saw my kid imitating firebathero i'd beat his ass too
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I've been in somewhat of a similiar situation with my father, although not nearly as extreme.
It would never happen anymore though. I told myself from a very young age that I would always stand strong and I would always talk to my dad. I tried to use simple talking and reasoning with him, even when he was crazy with anger.
Your situation is tough, however, because of the nature of the abuse. I understand it would be hard for you, or anyone to get any sort of authority involved. You're scared of hurting your family, including your Dad, I bet.
Frankly though, it seems to me that your Dad has past the line, BY FAR. Physically and emotionally assaulting you in such a terrible way is inexcusable. I think you need to tell someone, and a school counselor is probably your best bet.
edit: Hot_Bid! That wasn't appropriate at all.
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United States24498 Posts
Did you know teachers in the USA are legally obligated to report any cases of child abuse? Oh well I don't even know your IP so I can't really do that.
I wish I had some wonderful advice for you, but it's tough when your parent hits you. Telling your school is one way, but don't expect it to be all peachy. Trying to talk logically about it with your father could possibly work, but most likely will not. Going for the badass 'fight back' approach may not solve your problems either.
edit: Hot_Bid that's rather insensitive.
edit2: sorry when I said 'hits you' I meant to include the other things you described in the OP as well... I realize those contributed towards this being a different event
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On October 10 2008 13:53 BroOd wrote:
You're 17 years old now, you shouldn't put up with that at all. I know people talk about Asian parents and ridiculous traditions, but his ways don't have to be your ways.
Next time you're alone with him, take off your belt and slap it across something to get his attention. When he's looking at you, stare him down and say calmly, "Next time you take your belt to me, you'll be met with much more than defence."
Or something equally ominous or badass.
Rofl, that.
And then when he gives a look of confusion say: "Oh, and from now on, you can call me Sir Death Knight of The Silent Killing Clan"
Edit: or something equally as childish
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Wow, physical abuse in your household seems a bit out of hand.
As the others said, talk to counselors/teachers or even a government hotline for abuse. It's a good thing you're realizing it's time to make a move against it, because most people don't and just accept physical abuse as scolding and feel guilty if they tell anyone else.
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There's a line between discipline and w/e your dad is doing (and he obviously crossed it). Damn, blowing his nose and spitting? Is he usually a sour personality or is this just when he's angry?
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On October 10 2008 13:58 Hot_Bid wrote:
if i saw my kid imitating firebathero i'd beat his ass too
i'd give him a medal.
edit: oh yeah, fight back. don't punch him in the face or something, just push him over or something of that manner, nothing serious.
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Jeez, just because you screwed up on in honors gov your dad is doesn't have the right to do that to you at all, i know that asian parents can be this way; i had this situation with my mom too but she gave up on it during my high school years because she know i can do better without her getting mad. I could call this child abuse, but the only advice i could give you is don't give up and once you graduated from high school moved out.
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Canada9720 Posts
poor form, hb. i think a regular member would be temp-banned for something like that
like brood said, you're almost a grown man now. you don't have to put up with that shit. gl
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My parents don't do this kinda shit.
Find them abuse numbers yo (lol I can smell the irony already peace out TL.net~)
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holy crap.. this is like worse than the ultimate stereotypical asian parent..
i feel bad for you =[ my dad just threatens me with no college funding
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Austin10831 Posts
On October 10 2008 14:09 CTStalker wrote:
poor form, hb. i think a regular member would be temp-banned for something like that
like brood said, you're almost a grown man now. you don't have to put up with that shit. gl
Eh, a little humor is nice in somber topics like this. I sure wouldn't want to read 20 posts in a row about how shitty my situation is without one joke.
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Yeah this isn't about asian parents or nonasian parents. This is about one goddamn bad parent.
Sorry I really don't have any advice. But you know the options available to you. There are so many sources you can seek for help, please use them.
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EPT
