• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 08:29
CEST 14:29
KST 21:29
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Code S RO8 Preview: Rogue, GuMiho, Solar, Maru3BGE Stara Zagora 2025: Info & Preview27Code S RO12 Preview: GuMiho, Bunny, SHIN, ByuN3The Memories We Share - Facing the Final(?) GSL47Code S RO12 Preview: Cure, Zoun, Solar, Creator4
Community News
BGE Stara Zagora 2025 - Replay Pack2Weekly Cups (June 2-8): herO doubles down1[BSL20] ProLeague: Bracket Stage & Dates9GSL Ro4 and Finals moved to Sunday June 15th13Weekly Cups (May 27-June 1): ByuN goes back-to-back0
StarCraft 2
General
Jim claims he and Firefly were involved in match-fixing DreamHack Dallas 2025 - Official Replay Pack BGE Stara Zagora 2025 - Replay Pack Code S RO8 Preview: Rogue, GuMiho, Solar, Maru The SCII GOAT: A statistical Evaluation
Tourneys
[GSL 2025] Code S:Season 2 - RO8 - Group A Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond) Bellum Gens Elite: Stara Zagora 2025 $3,500 WardiTV European League 2025
Strategy
[G] Darkgrid Layout Simple Questions Simple Answers [G] PvT Cheese: 13 Gate Proxy Robo
Custom Maps
[UMS] Zillion Zerglings
External Content
Mutation # 477 Slow and Steady Mutation # 476 Charnel House Mutation # 475 Hard Target Mutation # 474 Futile Resistance
Brood War
General
BGH auto balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ BW General Discussion FlaSh Witnesses SCV Pull Off the Impossible vs Shu StarCraft & BroodWar Campaign Speedrun Quest Will foreigners ever be able to challenge Koreans?
Tourneys
[ASL19] Grand Finals [BSL20] GosuLeague RO16 - Tue & Wed 20:00+CET NA Team League 6/8/2025 [Megathread] Daily Proleagues
Strategy
I am doing this better than progamers do. [G] How to get started on ladder as a new Z player
Other Games
General Games
Nintendo Switch Thread Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Path of Exile What do you want from future RTS games? Armies of Exigo - YesYes?
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
LiquidLegends to reintegrate into TL.net
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread Vanilla Mini Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Vape Nation Thread European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread
Fan Clubs
Maru Fan Club Serral Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
Korean Music Discussion [Manga] One Piece
Sports
2024 - 2025 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion NHL Playoffs 2024
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
A Better Routine For Progame…
TrAiDoS
StarCraft improvement
iopq
Heero Yuy & the Tax…
KrillinFromwales
I was completely wrong ab…
jameswatts
Need Your Help/Advice
Glider
Trip to the Zoo
micronesia
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 32291 users

issue with my parents...

Blogs > YanGpaN
Post a Reply
1 2 3 Next All
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-09-11 00:07:29
September 10 2008 23:35 GMT
#1
This may seem immature, but basically its my rant. I'm a high school student, currently enrolling my junior year, and i live at home with my parents. The thing that annoys me is that the only topic my parents are willing to talk to me about is about school, my grades, and education. Not that its a bad thing, but they are over doing it by A LOT. Everytime they open their mouth is like a question like "How did you do on your test? what did u get in that chem test, the math test, the english test?" EVERYDAY!

Considering this is my junior year, the year which i take ACT/SAT's, my parents don't even allow me to do any sports anymore. I used to do cross country, sophomore year, and i was so happy that im going to be in the middle of the pack as a junior and not the slowest kid anymore... until i have been told down that i can't do cross country, cuz they want me to use the time i run to study for the standardized tests. Since i live in the middle part of USA, i take the ACT's, and they want me to take at least 1 practice test EVERY SINGLE WEEKEND.

Few weeks ago, during my 4 day weekened on labor day, a friend of mine asked me to go out to the movies, and I thought gladly yeah my folks will let me go cuz its a holiday... but nope they shot me down completely and even angry at me considering that... Basically this just became the conversation topic throughout the entire day.

My dad also likes to relate everyone of my minor 'mistakes' such as forgetting to turn on the headlights while driving, forgetting a folder at somewhere...etc. I know everyone makes those mistakes, but he uses it against me making up tons of reasons why i fail at tests, and how i can never do well because i made these errors... and i don't do that often. He relates it to as a test question and how i'd fail at math if it asked me to multiply and i forgot... And he goes on ranting about it for 15-30mins, and becomes part of his tool in his tool box in which he can use anytime he wants to criticize me.

Don't get me wrong, i'm not disrespectful to them in any way, i don't go screaming at them. I usually obey their orders actually i often obey their orders. They say i should go upstairs and study, i usually do until i just can't do it anymore, and then go on SC. They don't even know i play SC/bnet, but i dont think i can stand sitting in the office room studying all day during weekends with no social contact at all... I actually have quite alot of friends at school but i just can never hang out, and my relationships with them tend to drift further and further apart.

If you guys know me on BNET, this is actually the complete real reason why i can't play and my excuse is "i gtg soon", is because they don't allow me to play starcraft, and if i get caught they'd actually literally scream at me for like 5 hours straight, about how i can use that time to study for standardized tests, and how i don't have straight A's and H's(which is like a 97% on honors classes), and i shouldn't be on SC. They've actually broke my original starcraft CD, and i had to DL it again off a torrent... Because really i just can't imagine myself sitting there studying all day for days on during weekends...
=================

I believe this is the result of my dad growing up from an extremely poor area, in which he lived in like a dirt house, with my grandpa as a shepard in inner mongolia china. He was often hungry as a child, and didn't have a lot to eat. He was the only son who was able to move out of his province to beijing. Later to canada, and now to USA.

I think he really believes that studying and making big bucks is the solution to everything, and happiness. Thus he's making me to follow his route.

Its totally understandable considering the pain and suffering he's been through to be where he's at today...

=====

I however believe that money is only a tool that drags your feelings of happiness to an upward stage, and you'll feel that happiness for only a while until you get used to having the wealth. Think of it this way, who would be in a more positive state of mind, bill gates or a poor man who won 1000 dollars in a lottery? obviously the poor man.

I think a person who has a pay of 50,000 a year would be feeling the same as a guy with 200,000 a year. If the guy who has the 50,000 pay had his income doubled, he may be very excited and content, for probably only half a year, until he got used to having that. People of extreme wealth
are also upset by not getting the deal they usually get, and the average guy would look at the wealthy guy with disgust, and wonder wtf is wrong with him.

RIght now i'm actually worried if i'm going to be like this to my children when i grow older... I'm trying really hard to not


==========
I have actually never told any of this to anyone, this is the first time i've let it out....

lol, when i won the CJ shirt contest, i'm actually asking a friend to buy it for me, and mailing it to his house and then giving it to me at school once he recieves it. He's a real nice guy....

I appreciate you reading all of this, i just want some sympathy...

*****
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
Folca
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
2235 Posts
September 10 2008 23:36 GMT
#2
Your parents are jerks, but I guess they're trying to do whats best for you
Dea : one time when he was playing vs the comps he asked me "how do I make that flying unit that makes the other stuff invisible" and I reply "ur playing terran zomg"
Descent
Profile Joined January 2008
1244 Posts
September 10 2008 23:51 GMT
#3
I think I can understand your frustrations, but I also think that we need more background on your family and parents before we can even start making judgments on your situation; I mean, perhaps there's something in their background which you haven't addressed yet that is causing them to act in this overly-fervent manner when dealing with your education? No offense intended~
「 Dream & Future 」 ※ 「 STX SouL 」
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-09-10 23:54:30
September 10 2008 23:54 GMT
#4
On September 11 2008 08:51 Descent wrote:
I think I can understand your frustrations, but I also think that we need more background on your family and parents before we can even start making judgments on your situation; I mean, perhaps there's something in their background which you haven't addressed yet that is causing them to act in this overly-fervent manner when dealing with your education? No offense intended~


the only i know is that my dad grew from a very very poor village, and then managed to be able to use education which allowed him to move to beijing, then to canada, and then finally to USA. Thats the only background i truly know of... (which is stated in OP)

if nothing else, their asian...
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
H
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
New Zealand6138 Posts
September 10 2008 23:57 GMT
#5
It's actually kind of sad that your dad thinks that way, because he is obviously doing it only for your benefit. He doesn't want you to have the same struggle that he did. It's understandable and to be honest there's probably not much you can do about it, because he expects that since you are young, you do not have the same experiences and insight that he does about learning.
[iHs]HCO | のヮの | pachi & plexa ownz | RIP _
Titusmaster6
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States5937 Posts
September 10 2008 23:58 GMT
#6
I can't believe I would ever say this, but you deserve that CJ shirt more than I do. Enjoy it man. Try to relax, I mean I know it's hard but as long as you know your ultimate goal, then don't stress at all about the standarized tests.

I completely understand your story and also about your parents. It's like that in most Chinese families in China so ya. It's rough but at least you have it a lot easier than actually kids your age in china. Don't take high school so seriously and try to explain to your parents that unlike them who moved to the US, you grew up here and go to school here. Because probably unlike them, you have friends in this country. You need your social network and hanging out with friends and meeting new people is key.

I could go on forever but I guess you seem to know it anyway. gl hf and if your parents dont listen to your opinion then just really look forward to college.
Shorts down shorts up, BOOM, just like that.
fgsvsd
Profile Joined June 2007
Switzerland348 Posts
September 10 2008 23:58 GMT
#7
I don't believe there's any solution except moving out.

They are who they are, you cannot change them.
Descent
Profile Joined January 2008
1244 Posts
September 10 2008 23:59 GMT
#8
Yeah, I must've missed that section. Sorry. =(

Imho, I think what you mentioned about your dad is probably very related to what you're currently experiencing. Just wondering, but was your mother also raised in similar conditions? If not, perhaps you can try appealing more towards her. I don't know though, these kinds of things can be very complicated. =x
「 Dream & Future 」 ※ 「 STX SouL 」
iNcontroL *
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
USA29055 Posts
September 11 2008 00:00 GMT
#9
I can't help but feel bad for you. The stereotype is that Asian parents in the USA are typically overbearing and obsessive in regard to the issues you discuss. Sadly it is fairly common hence the stereotype. Don't rebel, don't get down on yourself.. just work with the situation. They have the best of intentions and they want you to succeed.. remember that in the end it is those thoughts that drive them to be annoying and domineering.
8Pylon
Profile Joined April 2008
United States223 Posts
September 11 2008 00:02 GMT
#10
meh...well arent asian parents usually extremely high on education?
Your parents sound like the typcial asian parents(no offense just what I seen from my asian friends).

Only thing I can actually say to you is..dude you listen to everything your parents say e.e..haha yes education is great. You need time to enjoy things though youre only a junior in highschool. You can still work and play. :/ forget what your parents said and go join XC. e.e..ill have to update later because im in class haha but seriously think about it.
I 3 pooled your mom with a napping drone, then scarabed her face. GG
8Pylon
Profile Joined April 2008
United States223 Posts
September 11 2008 00:02 GMT
#11
and yes i feel like shit now..im glad you have the shirt bro <3 wear it proud
I 3 pooled your mom with a napping drone, then scarabed her face. GG
CommanderFluffy
Profile Joined June 2008
Taiwan1059 Posts
September 11 2008 00:02 GMT
#12
I went through this crap too. At the end of the day they do it because they love you, I know this might sound cheesy as shit but they just want you to succeed in life.
When i was in your position i bargained for sports because i needed a physical outlet. See if you can get them to agree to X country, i think it'll help w/ the stress.
Pain is temporary, but glory is forever.
Jonoman92
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States9103 Posts
September 11 2008 00:04 GMT
#13
GS it seems that you are in a even worse than typical "Asian Parents" situation. I can't say for sure what your best option is because I don't know. But from what you've said it sounds like they are fucking crazy. I mean.... not letting you do cross country is ridiculous. You're like 16-17 so stand up to them. Have you ever cursed them out or anything?

Tell them you're dropping out of school because you want to be a garbage man or something and realize that they may want what they think is best for you, but they don't know what is best for you. Also, it is your life, not theirs so don't think you owe them anything.
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
September 11 2008 00:05 GMT
#14
thx all, yeah basically i joined cross coutnry, and track&field was to have more social contact with others, and have an good excuse that i can put it on my college resume to tell my folks...but really i dont give a shit about putting it on my resume...
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
8Pylon
Profile Joined April 2008
United States223 Posts
September 11 2008 00:06 GMT
#15
On September 11 2008 09:05 YanGpaN wrote:
thx all, yeah basically i joined cross coutnry, and track&field was to have more social contact with others, and have an good excuse that i can put it on my college resume to tell my folks...but really i dont give a shit about putting it on my resume...



well still hol-e-shit bro hahaha dont lose touch with society!! O_O
I 3 pooled your mom with a napping drone, then scarabed her face. GG
prOxi.swAMi
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Australia3091 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-09-11 00:21:52
September 11 2008 00:15 GMT
#16
Just do the same thing to your parents. Constantly quiz them ...
You: "Any closer to promotion today Dad?"
Dad: "No..."
You: "Why not?"
Dad: "...."
You: "You really need to be doing everything you can to get promoted Dad.. this is IMPORTANT.. you need to prioritize.. see, you're not being promoted because you're making mistakes x,y,z"

Of course, there's always two sides of a coin. I grew up with almost zero encouragement to do well in studies, and had to rely completely on my own motivation to get myself into University and a career. Having parents that encourage you to do well is something that many kids really long for. But it seems that you recognize your parents true intentions which is a good thing. You're just going to have to sit it out I guess. Try to focus on the positives.
Oh no
CaucasianAsian
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
Korea (South)11575 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-09-11 00:19:12
September 11 2008 00:18 GMT
#17
sucks, but do your parents give u drug tests every monday like mine did for over a year? (when i never did any drugs)
Calendar@ Fish Server: `iOps]..Stark
NeverTheEndlessWiz
Profile Joined November 2003
Singapore827 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-09-11 00:34:45
September 11 2008 00:19 GMT
#18
On September 11 2008 08:54 YanGpaN wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 11 2008 08:51 Descent wrote:
I think I can understand your frustrations, but I also think that we need more background on your family and parents before we can even start making judgments on your situation; I mean, perhaps there's something in their background which you haven't addressed yet that is causing them to act in this overly-fervent manner when dealing with your education? No offense intended~


the only i know is that my dad grew from a very very poor village, and then managed to be able to use education which allowed him to move to beijing, then to canada, and then finally to USA. Thats the only background i truly know of... (which is stated in OP)

if nothing else, their asian...


I understand what you mean. Of what is happening to you also happens a lot in Singapore. Maybe its in our chinese/asian genes haha =P

Same here for my father; he had his fair share of traveling and suffering (grew up in a malaysia village -> indonesia -> singapore) Guess I am lucky : I think my parents learnt the hard way that I am 'not them' and they cannot engineer me to be their success and successor. I do not necessary have to fulfill what they missed out, wanting me to do what they did not/have not been able to do. To a certain extent, yes it is true. We have more opportunities today compared to what they had back then. It is really up to us as the individual to pick it up from there. They cannot force us to pick up their pieces!

What our parent's generation didn't quite seem to catch today is yesterday's success is tomorrow's mediocrity. Although education is the only available key to success back then, things today have changed and it is not the only key. Society today just doesn't need smart educated-by-the-book people; it need people of all sorts of talent, especially emotional development. Glad that you are picking up other activities other than studying =P

When you have a single success outside the context of education, I am sure they will open their eyes to the truth. Just don't rebel, but work out possible alternatives. If you really want to play SC like how I play NFS seriously, start balancing your own life out. Do some part time work and offer to pay for part of the bills at home. Pay for what yourself for your gaming and socializing lifestyle =P A small sum of money usually speaks loudly in these situations. When you can foot the bill for yourself, they have nothing to say. Just make sure you do reasonably well for your studies for the sake of your parents paying it for you.
Retired Brood War player / WCG SG Top 8 for 2002, 2003, 2004, retired, then made minor comeback to Top 8 at 2008. 2009 = bleh xD
YPang
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
United States4024 Posts
September 11 2008 00:21 GMT
#19
On September 11 2008 09:18 CaucasianAsian wrote:
sucks, but do your parents give u drug tests every monday like mine did for over a year? (when i never did any drugs)


lol, they don't i gained their trust for always doing what they've asked for quite a long time, so they don't ever suspect me smoking, drinking, or doing any drugs.
sMi.Gladstone | BW: B high| SC2: gold T_T
RoC)Ninjah
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States238 Posts
September 11 2008 00:26 GMT
#20
I'm in a very similar situation, just a little less severe. I really feel for you though man, I just think parents don't understand how a kids mind works since everyone is different. Taking a pretest every weekend isn't going to motivate you to do well on a real once, such as sat or cat ect ect. You'll probably just think of it as another chore test that you have to do to make your parents happy. Anyway, good luck and hope the situation works out for you.
Much will win a title before his hair turns grey.
1 2 3 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
GSL Code S
09:30
Ro8 - Group A
GuMiho vs MaruLIVE!
Solar vs TBD
Crank 354
LiquipediaDiscussion
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
Harstem 243
ProTech76
EnDerr 60
StarCraft: Brood War
Britney 18035
Rain 5124
Calm 4884
Bisu 2053
Horang2 1679
Jaedong 978
Pusan 388
BeSt 369
Last 286
Mini 200
[ Show more ]
ZerO 175
TY 150
Snow 146
Soulkey 141
EffOrt 134
Light 117
Shuttle 85
ggaemo 84
Dewaltoss 77
Hyun 70
ToSsGirL 57
Shine 53
[sc1f]eonzerg 50
hero 45
PianO 38
Aegong 35
Killer 33
Mong 26
Sacsri 24
Icarus 23
sSak 22
JYJ22
Barracks 20
Sharp 20
Movie 18
sorry 17
zelot 6
HiyA 5
Dota 2
qojqva1211
420jenkins504
XcaliburYe457
Fuzer 227
Counter-Strike
x6flipin695
markeloff82
edward11
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor148
Other Games
singsing2720
B2W.Neo1280
DeMusliM496
Crank 354
XBOCT266
crisheroes201
XaKoH 127
Lowko78
ZerO(Twitch)25
Organizations
Dota 2
PGL Dota 2 - Secondary Stream9179
Other Games
gamesdonequick431
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 11 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
Other Games
• WagamamaTV141
Upcoming Events
Online Event
11h 32m
Replay Cast
13h 32m
GSL Code S
21h 2m
herO vs Zoun
Classic vs Bunny
The PondCast
21h 32m
Replay Cast
1d 11h
WardiTV Invitational
1d 22h
OSC
2 days
Korean StarCraft League
2 days
SOOP
2 days
CranKy Ducklings
2 days
[ Show More ]
WardiTV Invitational
2 days
Cheesadelphia
3 days
CSO Cup
3 days
GSL Code S
3 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
Wardi Open
4 days
Replay Cast
5 days
Replay Cast
5 days
RSL Revival
5 days
Cure vs Percival
ByuN vs Spirit
RSL Revival
6 days
herO vs sOs
Zoun vs Clem
Liquipedia Results

Completed

CSL Season 17: Qualifier 2
BGE Stara Zagora 2025
Heroes 10 EU

Ongoing

JPL Season 2
BSL 2v2 Season 3
BSL Season 20
KCM Race Survival 2025 Season 2
NPSL S3
Rose Open S1
CSL 17: 2025 SUMMER
2025 GSL S2
BLAST.tv Austin Major 2025
ESL Impact League Season 7
IEM Dallas 2025
PGL Astana 2025
Asian Champions League '25
BLAST Rivals Spring 2025
MESA Nomadic Masters
CCT Season 2 Global Finals
IEM Melbourne 2025
YaLLa Compass Qatar 2025
PGL Bucharest 2025
BLAST Open Spring 2025

Upcoming

Copa Latinoamericana 4
CSLPRO Last Chance 2025
CSLPRO Chat StarLAN 3
K-Championship
SEL Season 2 Championship
Esports World Cup 2025
HSC XXVII
Championship of Russia 2025
Murky Cup #2
Esports World Cup 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall Qual
IEM Cologne 2025
FISSURE Playground #1
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2025 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.