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Dating: How's your luck? - Page 620

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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
May 19 2015 04:30 GMT
#12381
To the guy that defended the SPE, there have been several remakes of it, and Zimbardo's results have always been found to be competition with those results. His interference into the study is a big issue with how people view it since he was the the prison "warden".

I haven't read the book, and I don't intend to. He's a smart guy, and a big name in psychology at least because of his controversial study, but that book cries old person. It's the same idea as rock n roll killing chivalry or etiquette among young people. Online porn may be bad, it might not be, the case isn't closed just yet. Arguing that our connectivity and the internet in general makes us draw away from society is the kind of hilarious irony that psychologists love to use when they draw conclusions. There's no reason to hail it as a breakthrough just yet.
User was warned for too many mimes.
evilfatsh1t
Profile Joined October 2010
Australia8788 Posts
May 19 2015 04:54 GMT
#12382
On April 15 2015 11:23 shin_toss wrote:
Any Korean guys here? Can I get general tips for dating Korean girl? (were Not yet dating but yeah I want to be positive) Thanks :D :D

still need help?
arb
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
Noobville17921 Posts
May 20 2015 20:38 GMT
#12383
On May 19 2015 10:46 Impervious wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 19 2015 06:58 SixStrings wrote:
I'm afraid I just crossed the threshold from being slightly eccentric to being a full blown mentalcase.

I've been spending time with a girl I've met a couple of weeks ago (and I had the same issue when I was dating E-Cups), and she's been a treat. Lively in bed, adventurous outside of it, uncomplicated, friendly, open with her affections and just a super active person. I often find myself thinking of her and even missing her.

However, whenever we're together, I just want to be alone. We do something amazing and I'm just thinking: "God I wish I were on the shitter reading Nat Geo now". This is getting to be a problem, because I find myself making up excuses to cut short dates, to not spend the night at her place, to politely get her to leave in the morning when she stayed over at mine... You get the idea.

Wait, this isn't normal? Cause that describes me and every "relationship" I've attempted.....

dunno feel like you shouldnt be spending 24/7 together at the start though tbh.
living with someone is alot different than just staying with someone once in a while though
Artillery spawned from the forges of Hell
mecrotq
Profile Joined June 2013
Canada121 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-20 22:43:24
May 20 2015 22:37 GMT
#12384
ghrur
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States3786 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-20 22:47:56
May 20 2015 22:44 GMT
#12385
Deleted.
darkness overpowering
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-20 23:14:26
May 20 2015 23:06 GMT
#12386
On May 21 2015 05:38 arb wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 19 2015 10:46 Impervious wrote:
On May 19 2015 06:58 SixStrings wrote:
I'm afraid I just crossed the threshold from being slightly eccentric to being a full blown mentalcase.

I've been spending time with a girl I've met a couple of weeks ago (and I had the same issue when I was dating E-Cups), and she's been a treat. Lively in bed, adventurous outside of it, uncomplicated, friendly, open with her affections and just a super active person. I often find myself thinking of her and even missing her.

However, whenever we're together, I just want to be alone. We do something amazing and I'm just thinking: "God I wish I were on the shitter reading Nat Geo now". This is getting to be a problem, because I find myself making up excuses to cut short dates, to not spend the night at her place, to politely get her to leave in the morning when she stayed over at mine... You get the idea.

Wait, this isn't normal? Cause that describes me and every "relationship" I've attempted.....

dunno feel like you shouldnt be spending 24/7 together at the start though tbh.
living with someone is alot different than just staying with someone once in a while though

Yeah pace yourself at start man. I find leaving 5-7 days between dates with very little contact inbetween builds up attraction for me and her too, and being together is WAY more intense afterwards from both sides.


I'm seeing 2 chicks - one played games, let me do all initiating (and I did if for dates only more or less) went with the 1x per week thing. And I'm crazy about her, love planning stuff, and pretty much fell for her some 7 weeks later, and it's mutual. And I can tell you what we did on every single date in detail.

The other one called me out for being a dick for never texting/contacting her, tried to move fast, seen me more often, we talked a lot over the phone etc. and now 3 weeks later I feel what you feel and she pretty much friend zoned herself, and the attraction is just not there even tho she's hot as all hell and smart/interesting.
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
puerk
Profile Joined February 2015
Germany855 Posts
May 20 2015 23:19 GMT
#12387
Is there a particular reason 80% of your posts read like incoherent rambling chest beating brags?
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
May 20 2015 23:24 GMT
#12388
just sharing my experiences, the advice from others in the thread has been very useful so trying to get sth back

The space between dates at start is a pretty big thing tho that takes discipline but is totally worth it
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
God Killer v2
Profile Joined March 2015
United States434 Posts
May 21 2015 21:19 GMT
#12389
Just got a date this Saturday, hope I don't screw it up
DARSHAN??? --GO C9 GO CLG GO KOO--
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45222 Posts
May 21 2015 21:29 GMT
#12390
On May 22 2015 06:19 God Killer v2 wrote:
Just got a date this Saturday, hope I don't screw it up


Haha hopefully not! What are you two doing on this date?
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
May 21 2015 23:42 GMT
#12391
On May 22 2015 06:29 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2015 06:19 God Killer v2 wrote:
Just got a date this Saturday, hope I don't screw it up


Haha hopefully not! What are you two doing on this date?

Good creative date ideas btw?
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45222 Posts
May 22 2015 00:09 GMT
#12392
On May 22 2015 08:42 LemOn wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2015 06:29 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On May 22 2015 06:19 God Killer v2 wrote:
Just got a date this Saturday, hope I don't screw it up


Haha hopefully not! What are you two doing on this date?

Good creative date ideas btw?


For a first date, I'm a fan of anything that promotes talking and laughing. Could be going out for coffee/ a meal, could be bowling/ mini-golf... pretty much anything except going to a movie theater, as you spend 2 hours sitting in the dark and not getting to know or bond with the person you're out on a date with.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
ttk
Profile Joined May 2015
United States3 Posts
May 22 2015 02:19 GMT
#12393
Any tips for meeting girls?

I live in a suburby area (so not a city) and take classes at a local college. I find meeting girls to be incredibly hard and especially girls that are my age (20).
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45222 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-22 02:22:27
May 22 2015 02:21 GMT
#12394
On May 22 2015 11:19 ttk wrote:
Any tips for meeting girls?

I live in a suburby area (so not a city) and take classes at a local college. I find meeting girls to be incredibly hard and especially girls that are my age (20).


Perhaps in your classes? You'll already have a common interest, and can study/ get coffee together sometime?

Are you in the USA? Just asking because I guess you'd need to wait a year before you can meet girls at a bar/ club (although those are both great places if you can get in).

What else do you do in your spare time? Any hobbies that are outdoors or in a group (e.g., sports, gym) can increase your chance of meeting girls.

There's also online dating, but I have zero experience with that.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
ttk
Profile Joined May 2015
United States3 Posts
May 22 2015 02:42 GMT
#12395
On May 22 2015 11:21 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2015 11:19 ttk wrote:
Any tips for meeting girls?

I live in a suburby area (so not a city) and take classes at a local college. I find meeting girls to be incredibly hard and especially girls that are my age (20).


Perhaps in your classes? You'll already have a common interest, and can study/ get coffee together sometime?

Are you in the USA? Just asking because I guess you'd need to wait a year before you can meet girls at a bar/ club (although those are both great places if you can get in).

What else do you do in your spare time? Any hobbies that are outdoors or in a group (e.g., sports, gym) can increase your chance of meeting girls.

There's also online dating, but I have zero experience with that.


I'm an engineering major so of the small amount of girls in my classes are either taken or not that interesting.

I haven't played sports in about a year and the gym I go to is pretty vacant because I go during lunch. I've been tempted to try one of the 'adult' sports leagues but it looks like it's filled with people who are 30+ or older. When I look around online for groups for younger people all I can find are semi-pro leagues which is not what I'm interested.
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45222 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-05-22 02:48:51
May 22 2015 02:45 GMT
#12396
On May 22 2015 11:42 ttk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2015 11:21 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On May 22 2015 11:19 ttk wrote:
Any tips for meeting girls?

I live in a suburby area (so not a city) and take classes at a local college. I find meeting girls to be incredibly hard and especially girls that are my age (20).


Perhaps in your classes? You'll already have a common interest, and can study/ get coffee together sometime?

Are you in the USA? Just asking because I guess you'd need to wait a year before you can meet girls at a bar/ club (although those are both great places if you can get in).

What else do you do in your spare time? Any hobbies that are outdoors or in a group (e.g., sports, gym) can increase your chance of meeting girls.

There's also online dating, but I have zero experience with that.


I'm an engineering major so of the small amount of girls in my classes are either taken or not that interesting.

I haven't played sports in about a year and the gym I go to is pretty vacant because I go during lunch. I've been tempted to try one of the 'adult' sports leagues but it looks like it's filled with people who are 30+ or older. When I look around online for groups for younger people all I can find are semi-pro leagues which is not what I'm interested.


Do you also work too? Perhaps at your job?

I was a math major so I feel your pain as far as the male/ female ratio goes. Quite frankly (and I know this isn't what you're asking, so I apologize in advance), I recommend just finishing up/ focusing on your degree now and you'll have an easier time when you're 21 (bar/ club) and a graduate (can meet women at work). I wouldn't completely dismiss other outdoor/ group activities or online dating though.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States23581 Posts
May 22 2015 02:50 GMT
#12397
Another option is finding a girl that you think you would be interesting in being friends with and hope she has friends she can introduce you to.
"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45222 Posts
May 22 2015 02:52 GMT
#12398
On May 22 2015 11:50 GreenHorizons wrote:
Another option is finding a girl that you think you would be interesting in being friends with and hope she has friends she can introduce you to.


That could work, although it sounds a little bit creepy to make a new female friend just to use her to get to her other friends. It would probably take a while to build up trust, so if ttk currently has any platonic female friends, that could certainly be another feasible avenue
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States23581 Posts
May 22 2015 03:07 GMT
#12399
On May 22 2015 11:52 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2015 11:50 GreenHorizons wrote:
Another option is finding a girl that you think you would be interesting in being friends with and hope she has friends she can introduce you to.


That could work, although it sounds a little bit creepy to make a new female friend just to use her to get to her other friends. It would probably take a while to build up trust, so if ttk currently has any platonic female friends, that could certainly be another feasible avenue


Yeah the first way I worded it sounded jerky/creepy. So I went with "one you think you would want to be friends with anyway". I suggest finding some club or group, the better the ratio the more likely you find either a girl your interested in romantically or just one that shares a common interest and possibly provide some insight from 'the other side'.

"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
May 22 2015 03:58 GMT
#12400
On May 22 2015 11:42 ttk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On May 22 2015 11:21 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On May 22 2015 11:19 ttk wrote:
Any tips for meeting girls?

I live in a suburby area (so not a city) and take classes at a local college. I find meeting girls to be incredibly hard and especially girls that are my age (20).


Perhaps in your classes? You'll already have a common interest, and can study/ get coffee together sometime?

Are you in the USA? Just asking because I guess you'd need to wait a year before you can meet girls at a bar/ club (although those are both great places if you can get in).

What else do you do in your spare time? Any hobbies that are outdoors or in a group (e.g., sports, gym) can increase your chance of meeting girls.

There's also online dating, but I have zero experience with that.


I'm an engineering major so of the small amount of girls in my classes are either taken or not that interesting.

I haven't played sports in about a year and the gym I go to is pretty vacant because I go during lunch. I've been tempted to try one of the 'adult' sports leagues but it looks like it's filled with people who are 30+ or older. When I look around online for groups for younger people all I can find are semi-pro leagues which is not what I'm interested.


Does your school have any recreational sports leagues or other group activities you'd be interested in joining?
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