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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
IgnE
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7681 Posts
April 11 2015 17:47 GMT
#12181
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


Intelligence is not independent of beauty.
The unrealistic sound of these propositions is indicative, not of their utopian character, but of the strength of the forces which prevent their realization.
GoTuNk!
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
Chile4591 Posts
April 11 2015 17:48 GMT
#12182
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman
Ghostcom
Profile Joined March 2010
Denmark4783 Posts
April 11 2015 18:06 GMT
#12183
On April 12 2015 02:47 IgnE wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


Intelligence is not independent of beauty.


Nor are the people we meet a random sample of the worlds population.
excitedBear
Profile Joined March 2015
Austria120 Posts
April 11 2015 18:34 GMT
#12184
On April 12 2015 02:48 GoTuNk! wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman

What do you mean by game?
As mentioned, I'm not playing the field.
If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky.

Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free.
The world is unfair. It is as it is.
IgnE
Profile Joined November 2010
United States7681 Posts
April 11 2015 18:34 GMT
#12185
Maybe he means top 2% of the people hes met in his life. I think we need pics to verify.
The unrealistic sound of these propositions is indicative, not of their utopian character, but of the strength of the forces which prevent their realization.
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
April 11 2015 18:38 GMT
#12186
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


I think your restrictions are unnecessarily strict then. You really consider only 1 in 50 women attractive?
Ghostcom
Profile Joined March 2010
Denmark4783 Posts
April 11 2015 18:47 GMT
#12187
On April 12 2015 03:34 IgnE wrote:
Maybe he means top 2% of the people hes met in his life. I think we need pics to verify.


agreed.
GoTuNk!
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
Chile4591 Posts
April 11 2015 18:56 GMT
#12188
On April 12 2015 03:34 excitedBear wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 12 2015 02:48 GoTuNk! wrote:
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman

What do you mean by game?
As mentioned, I'm not playing the field.
If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky.

Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free.
The world is unfair. It is as it is.


Having game is knowing how to get woman, not chasing them around at bars multiple times a week and taking them out on expensive dates.

If looks plus money was all that is needed to attract woman, guys might as well wear shirts with their daily income.
Tons of good looking guys are "losers" with woman, while everyone knows guys who are all around losers in life who can still get layed.
puerk
Profile Joined February 2015
Germany855 Posts
April 11 2015 22:29 GMT
#12189
On April 12 2015 03:34 excitedBear wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 12 2015 02:48 GoTuNk! wrote:
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman

What do you mean by game?
As mentioned, I'm not playing the field.
If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky.

Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free.
The world is unfair. It is as it is.

maybe you need some other venue to boast... you start to sound silly.
ROOTFayth
Profile Joined January 2004
Canada3351 Posts
April 11 2015 23:16 GMT
#12190
especially since "beauty" is often in the eyes of the beholder, top 2% lol

there are also different type of intelligence, top 2% again lol
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
April 12 2015 08:05 GMT
#12191
Talked about a girl who had a boyfriend earlier in this thread.

Anyway. She removed her 'is in a relationship' status, I then asked her if she wanted to go for a walk, she said yes and we went for a two hour walk. At the end of the walk I asked if she wanted to grab dinner with me. She then said 'you know I still have a boyfriend', we just sort of stared at each other for a while and she told me that things between them weren't really good and that she hadn't seen him for a few days. Rejected, I hugged her goodbye and went home.

The day after I got a text saying she wants to swing by my place, I was not home at the time she sent it and sent back a text later asking if she wanted anything special. She didn't respond to that. So I asked her if she was roleplaying an ent from lotr. Got a text yesterday saying that she broke up with her boyfriend. I just responded with "Okey. I'm not sure what you want me do with this information. You already know what I want."

"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
Snotling
Profile Joined August 2011
Germany885 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-04-12 10:54:12
April 12 2015 10:43 GMT
#12192
I think top2%guy shuold reevaluate if the reality he lives in is in sync with the one the other people live in.

Id say the chance it isnt is about 98%

Also: If your PHD isnt in physics, you might as well have none at all :D
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-04-12 11:19:37
April 12 2015 11:18 GMT
#12193
On April 12 2015 17:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Talked about a girl who had a boyfriend earlier in this thread.

Anyway. She removed her 'is in a relationship' status, I then asked her if she wanted to go for a walk, she said yes and we went for a two hour walk. At the end of the walk I asked if she wanted to grab dinner with me. She then said 'you know I still have a boyfriend', we just sort of stared at each other for a while and she told me that things between them weren't really good and that she hadn't seen him for a few days. Rejected, I hugged her goodbye and went home.

The day after I got a text saying she wants to swing by my place, I was not home at the time she sent it and sent back a text later asking if she wanted anything special. She didn't respond to that. So I asked her if she was roleplaying an ent from lotr. Got a text yesterday saying that she broke up with her boyfriend. I just responded with "Okey. I'm not sure what you want me do with this information. You already know what I want."


I guess grab a dinner means "grab a boob"?

I'm actually curious what people think about going out with a girl on a rebound. Because the end of the relationship sucked of course and neither had their needs met... And after a breakup you just look for anything to get validation, fill the void... Pretty much look for anyone.

When I broke up with my last GF she was active on tinder...the very same night (as was I lol).


So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother.
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
April 12 2015 15:12 GMT
#12194
On April 12 2015 07:29 puerk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 12 2015 03:34 excitedBear wrote:
On April 12 2015 02:48 GoTuNk! wrote:
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote:
When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest.
It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty.

2% x 2% = 0.04%
That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match.


How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman

What do you mean by game?
As mentioned, I'm not playing the field.
If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky.

Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free.
The world is unfair. It is as it is.

maybe you need some other venue to boast... you start to sound silly.

Man, and here I was going around thinking that it was post count on TL that made girls swoon. I'm glad this guy has set me straight.
User was warned for too many mimes.
lohdon
Profile Blog Joined September 2014
170 Posts
April 12 2015 16:28 GMT
#12195
On April 12 2015 20:18 LemOn wrote:
Show nested quote +
On April 12 2015 17:05 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Talked about a girl who had a boyfriend earlier in this thread.

Anyway. She removed her 'is in a relationship' status, I then asked her if she wanted to go for a walk, she said yes and we went for a two hour walk. At the end of the walk I asked if she wanted to grab dinner with me. She then said 'you know I still have a boyfriend', we just sort of stared at each other for a while and she told me that things between them weren't really good and that she hadn't seen him for a few days. Rejected, I hugged her goodbye and went home.

The day after I got a text saying she wants to swing by my place, I was not home at the time she sent it and sent back a text later asking if she wanted anything special. She didn't respond to that. So I asked her if she was roleplaying an ent from lotr. Got a text yesterday saying that she broke up with her boyfriend. I just responded with "Okey. I'm not sure what you want me do with this information. You already know what I want."


I guess grab a dinner means "grab a boob"?

I'm actually curious what people think about going out with a girl on a rebound. Because the end of the relationship sucked of course and neither had their needs met... And after a breakup you just look for anything to get validation, fill the void... Pretty much look for anyone.

When I broke up with my last GF she was active on tinder...the very same night (as was I lol).


So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother.


In general I don't think it's a good idea if you are looking for something serious. Bouncing from one relationship into the next kind of shows that you aren't committing to your relationships. Especially if the breakup didn't happen before showing interest.
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
April 12 2015 16:51 GMT
#12196

So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother.


Yeah I don't think this will turn out to anything.

In general I don't think it's a good idea if you are looking for something serious. Bouncing from one relationship into the next kind of shows that you aren't committing to your relationships. Especially if the breakup didn't happen before showing interest.


Yeah I have no idea. If only you could take a pill and turn gay, I'd eat twenty of them fuckers.
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
JoeCool
Profile Joined January 2012
Germany2520 Posts
April 12 2015 17:08 GMT
#12197
Any advice on how to flirt/begin a conversation with a (fem.) barkeeper?
I went to a metal club last friday - couple of my friends go there every friday, I join them as often as possible - and there was this hot chick working at the bar, I ordered a couple of whiskies (she gave me the first one for 1/2 price) but somehow missed the opportunity to chat with her.
Normally I would not try to hit on a girl that's working in a club, because they probably get hit on a thousand times per evening but this time I can not get this girl out of my head. Plus I believe that the odds aren't that bad since it's a trendy, and quite empty nightclub. There are maybe 50-80 people per evening. 95% of the guys there are either in a relationship or shy. Or not interested in flirting...
Except for that gay guy that tried to hit on me. >_> Probably because was dressed like George Clooney in a club where most people look like they are straight out of Wacken. (No offense )

Bastinian
Profile Joined October 2014
Serbia177 Posts
April 12 2015 18:19 GMT
#12198
Here's my sad story! :\
+ Show Spoiler +
I've never been in a relationship before, but I don't consider myself as someone who can't get GF, I'm just picky, but I don't look for girls that look good but ones who are intelligent, ones who I can talk to anytime, not just stare into ground and wait for me to talk every time. I have also pretty huge problem, is that I live in small town, and people are going to bar where is horrible music being played and I was there once or twice and never again, I don't really like going there.
There was a girl I liked in elementary school, she looked pretty nice, I wanted to approach her, but problem would be that whole school will look onto me like alien and would definitely laugh and mock me, which I couldn't deal with. I added her on Facebook, talked to her a lot, she liked South Korea and K-pop (at the time I haven't played SC T_T) and she was pretty smart, but she was shy and I couldn't see her hanging out anywhere. I still like her, and lately I could see her going into bus while I was waiting my bus, different one ( ) and I still would get butterflies in stomach when I look at her :3 I kinda think about her pretty often for a while now.
Tryhard, road to pro-gamer! :) | twitter.com/bastiniansc2 | twitch.tv/bastinian |
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18187 Posts
April 12 2015 18:33 GMT
#12199
On April 13 2015 03:19 Bastinian wrote:
Here's my sad story! :\
+ Show Spoiler +
I've never been in a relationship before, but I don't consider myself as someone who can't get GF, I'm just picky, but I don't look for girls that look good but ones who are intelligent, ones who I can talk to anytime, not just stare into ground and wait for me to talk every time. I have also pretty huge problem, is that I live in small town, and people are going to bar where is horrible music being played and I was there once or twice and never again, I don't really like going there.
There was a girl I liked in elementary school, she looked pretty nice, I wanted to approach her, but problem would be that whole school will look onto me like alien and would definitely laugh and mock me, which I couldn't deal with. I added her on Facebook, talked to her a lot, she liked South Korea and K-pop (at the time I haven't played SC T_T) and she was pretty smart, but she was shy and I couldn't see her hanging out anywhere. I still like her, and lately I could see her going into bus while I was waiting my bus, different one ( ) and I still would get butterflies in stomach when I look at her :3 I kinda think about her pretty often for a while now.

So... just ask her out? You have her on facebook, just ask if she wants to meet somewhere for a coffee/beer/icecream/whatever the local custom is?
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18187 Posts
April 12 2015 18:36 GMT
#12200
On April 13 2015 02:08 JoeCool wrote:
Any advice on how to flirt/begin a conversation with a (fem.) barkeeper?
I went to a metal club last friday - couple of my friends go there every friday, I join them as often as possible - and there was this hot chick working at the bar, I ordered a couple of whiskies (she gave me the first one for 1/2 price) but somehow missed the opportunity to chat with her.
Normally I would not try to hit on a girl that's working in a club, because they probably get hit on a thousand times per evening but this time I can not get this girl out of my head. Plus I believe that the odds aren't that bad since it's a trendy, and quite empty nightclub. There are maybe 50-80 people per evening. 95% of the guys there are either in a relationship or shy. Or not interested in flirting...
Except for that gay guy that tried to hit on me. >_> Probably because was dressed like George Clooney in a club where most people look like they are straight out of Wacken. (No offense )


Barkeepers are people too. You approach them the same way you approach anybody. Just keep in mind that she is working and may not have time to hang around. Very quick chat, get her number, phone her when she's off work.
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