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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote: When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest. It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty. 2% x 2% = 0.04% That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match. Intelligence is not independent of beauty. | ||
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GoTuNk!
Chile4591 Posts
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote: When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest. It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty. 2% x 2% = 0.04% That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match. How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman | ||
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Ghostcom
Denmark4783 Posts
Nor are the people we meet a random sample of the worlds population. | ||
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excitedBear
Austria120 Posts
On April 12 2015 02:48 GoTuNk! wrote: How is your game? Being good looking and good at your job is not that important if you don't have the attitude and behavior that's attractive to woman What do you mean by game? As mentioned, I'm not playing the field. If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky. Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free. The world is unfair. It is as it is. | ||
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
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Najda
United States3765 Posts
On April 12 2015 00:42 excitedBear wrote: When I said "above average" I was being unnecessarily modest. It's more like the top 2% in both intelligence and beauty. 2% x 2% = 0.04% That means out of 2500 girls, one would be a potential match. I think your restrictions are unnecessarily strict then. You really consider only 1 in 50 women attractive? | ||
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Ghostcom
Denmark4783 Posts
On April 12 2015 03:34 IgnE wrote: Maybe he means top 2% of the people hes met in his life. I think we need pics to verify. agreed. | ||
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GoTuNk!
Chile4591 Posts
On April 12 2015 03:34 excitedBear wrote: What do you mean by game? As mentioned, I'm not playing the field. If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky. Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free. The world is unfair. It is as it is. Having game is knowing how to get woman, not chasing them around at bars multiple times a week and taking them out on expensive dates. If looks plus money was all that is needed to attract woman, guys might as well wear shirts with their daily income. Tons of good looking guys are "losers" with woman, while everyone knows guys who are all around losers in life who can still get layed. | ||
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puerk
Germany855 Posts
On April 12 2015 03:34 excitedBear wrote: What do you mean by game? As mentioned, I'm not playing the field. If you can get any girl attracted to you 2 min after meeting her, you start getting kind of picky. Also, you realize that most guys around you are putting ridiculous amounts of time and effort into attracting and dating women, something that you can have basically for free. The world is unfair. It is as it is. maybe you need some other venue to boast... you start to sound silly. | ||
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ROOTFayth
Canada3351 Posts
there are also different type of intelligence, top 2% again lol | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
Anyway. She removed her 'is in a relationship' status, I then asked her if she wanted to go for a walk, she said yes and we went for a two hour walk. At the end of the walk I asked if she wanted to grab dinner with me. She then said 'you know I still have a boyfriend', we just sort of stared at each other for a while and she told me that things between them weren't really good and that she hadn't seen him for a few days. Rejected, I hugged her goodbye and went home. The day after I got a text saying she wants to swing by my place, I was not home at the time she sent it and sent back a text later asking if she wanted anything special. She didn't respond to that. So I asked her if she was roleplaying an ent from lotr. Got a text yesterday saying that she broke up with her boyfriend. I just responded with "Okey. I'm not sure what you want me do with this information. You already know what I want." | ||
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Snotling
Germany885 Posts
Id say the chance it isnt is about 98% Also: If your PHD isnt in physics, you might as well have none at all :D | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On April 12 2015 17:05 bloodwhore~ wrote: Talked about a girl who had a boyfriend earlier in this thread. Anyway. She removed her 'is in a relationship' status, I then asked her if she wanted to go for a walk, she said yes and we went for a two hour walk. At the end of the walk I asked if she wanted to grab dinner with me. She then said 'you know I still have a boyfriend', we just sort of stared at each other for a while and she told me that things between them weren't really good and that she hadn't seen him for a few days. Rejected, I hugged her goodbye and went home. The day after I got a text saying she wants to swing by my place, I was not home at the time she sent it and sent back a text later asking if she wanted anything special. She didn't respond to that. So I asked her if she was roleplaying an ent from lotr. Got a text yesterday saying that she broke up with her boyfriend. I just responded with "Okey. I'm not sure what you want me do with this information. You already know what I want." I guess grab a dinner means "grab a boob"?  I'm actually curious what people think about going out with a girl on a rebound. Because the end of the relationship sucked of course and neither had their needs met... And after a breakup you just look for anything to get validation, fill the void... Pretty much look for anyone. When I broke up with my last GF she was active on tinder...the very same night (as was I lol). So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother. | ||
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docvoc
United States5491 Posts
On April 12 2015 07:29 puerk wrote: maybe you need some other venue to boast... you start to sound silly. Man, and here I was going around thinking that it was post count on TL that made girls swoon. I'm glad this guy has set me straight. | ||
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lohdon
170 Posts
On April 12 2015 20:18 LemOn wrote: I guess grab a dinner means "grab a boob"? I'm actually curious what people think about going out with a girl on a rebound. Because the end of the relationship sucked of course and neither had their needs met... And after a breakup you just look for anything to get validation, fill the void... Pretty much look for anyone. When I broke up with my last GF she was active on tinder...the very same night (as was I lol). So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother. In general I don't think it's a good idea if you are looking for something serious. Bouncing from one relationship into the next kind of shows that you aren't committing to your relationships. Especially if the breakup didn't happen before showing interest. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
So can you take chicks on the rebound seriously? I guess giving them space telling them what you want and leaving it up to them is a start - I kinda like your last text. but I'm not sure I'd bother. Yeah I don't think this will turn out to anything. In general I don't think it's a good idea if you are looking for something serious. Bouncing from one relationship into the next kind of shows that you aren't committing to your relationships. Especially if the breakup didn't happen before showing interest. Yeah I have no idea. If only you could take a pill and turn gay, I'd eat twenty of them fuckers. | ||
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JoeCool
Germany2520 Posts
I went to a metal club last friday - couple of my friends go there every friday, I join them as often as possible - and there was this hot chick working at the bar, I ordered a couple of whiskies (she gave me the first one for 1/2 price) but somehow missed the opportunity to chat with her. Normally I would not try to hit on a girl that's working in a club, because they probably get hit on a thousand times per evening but this time I can not get this girl out of my head. Plus I believe that the odds aren't that bad since it's a trendy, and quite empty nightclub. There are maybe 50-80 people per evening. 95% of the guys there are either in a relationship or shy. Or not interested in flirting... Except for that gay guy that tried to hit on me. >_> Probably because was dressed like George Clooney in a club where most people look like they are straight out of Wacken. (No offense  ) | ||
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Bastinian
Serbia177 Posts
+ Show Spoiler + I've never been in a relationship before, but I don't consider myself as someone who can't get GF, I'm just picky, but I don't look for girls that look good but ones who are intelligent, ones who I can talk to anytime, not just stare into ground and wait for me to talk every time. I have also pretty huge problem, is that I live in small town, and people are going to bar where is horrible music being played and I was there once or twice and never again, I don't really like going there. There was a girl I liked in elementary school, she looked pretty nice, I wanted to approach her, but problem would be that whole school will look onto me like alien and would definitely laugh and mock me, which I couldn't deal with. I added her on Facebook, talked to her a lot, she liked South Korea and K-pop (at the time I haven't played SC T_T) and she was pretty smart, but she was shy and I couldn't see her hanging out anywhere. I still like her, and lately I could see her going into bus while I was waiting my bus, different one (  ) and I still would get butterflies in stomach when I look at her :3 I kinda think about her pretty often for a while now. | ||
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Acrofales
Spain18291 Posts
On April 13 2015 03:19 Bastinian wrote: Here's my sad story! :\ + Show Spoiler + I've never been in a relationship before, but I don't consider myself as someone who can't get GF, I'm just picky, but I don't look for girls that look good but ones who are intelligent, ones who I can talk to anytime, not just stare into ground and wait for me to talk every time. I have also pretty huge problem, is that I live in small town, and people are going to bar where is horrible music being played and I was there once or twice and never again, I don't really like going there. There was a girl I liked in elementary school, she looked pretty nice, I wanted to approach her, but problem would be that whole school will look onto me like alien and would definitely laugh and mock me, which I couldn't deal with. I added her on Facebook, talked to her a lot, she liked South Korea and K-pop (at the time I haven't played SC T_T) and she was pretty smart, but she was shy and I couldn't see her hanging out anywhere. I still like her, and lately I could see her going into bus while I was waiting my bus, different one ( ) and I still would get butterflies in stomach when I look at her :3 I kinda think about her pretty often for a while now.So... just ask her out? You have her on facebook, just ask if she wants to meet somewhere for a coffee/beer/icecream/whatever the local custom is? | ||
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Acrofales
Spain18291 Posts
On April 13 2015 02:08 JoeCool wrote: Any advice on how to flirt/begin a conversation with a (fem.) barkeeper? I went to a metal club last friday - couple of my friends go there every friday, I join them as often as possible - and there was this hot chick working at the bar, I ordered a couple of whiskies (she gave me the first one for 1/2 price) but somehow missed the opportunity to chat with her. Normally I would not try to hit on a girl that's working in a club, because they probably get hit on a thousand times per evening but this time I can not get this girl out of my head. Plus I believe that the odds aren't that bad since it's a trendy, and quite empty nightclub. There are maybe 50-80 people per evening. 95% of the guys there are either in a relationship or shy. Or not interested in flirting... Except for that gay guy that tried to hit on me. >_> Probably because was dressed like George Clooney in a club where most people look like they are straight out of Wacken. (No offense )Barkeepers are people too. You approach them the same way you approach anybody. Just keep in mind that she is working and may not have time to hang around. Very quick chat, get her number, phone her when she's off work. | ||
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