When I was about to decide my profession I followed the one of my sister. There lies no real exlanation behind this except that I have always looked up to her and still do.
I wanted to try out to be a Chef.
With that said I went on going through culinary school...
Being one of my teachers absolute favourite he gave me a huge and honarble opportunity to travel to Luxemburg during three months to work in a restaurant with one star in the Michelin Guide! To learn the ways of the french cusine.
I worked day and night. 15 hours was a short day but luckily I had one day off every week because of Swedish rules chef said.
Chef was honest and his passion for his restaurant and food was truly remarkable.
He was VERY angry at most times. If you have watched Gordon Ramsey I just have to note that this is the real deal. This was his passion, his restaurant and he wanted to keep his star and earn more. He wanted to be famous and noone should come in the way and ruin it.
Shouting in the kitchen during peak hours was standard and almost everyone had a high deal of respect for Chef, the rest got fired instantly afer service was done. During my three months there two peope got fierd.
Luckily for me I just got a few slaps in the face and threatened to be sent home "if you do another plate like this".
Chef teached me one thing that I will always keep with me something that you only can learn by doing and truly understanding. Confidence.
Everytime I failed at something he blamed it on my confidence even though my skills were totally lacking. It was always my confidence that held me back.
I could write 100 pages about my adventure in this restaurant. But im saving some.
When I had finished my three months, I got offered work. I turned it down due to working abroad really didn´t feel right for me. The culture differences, escpecially working with service just didn´t fit me, I said. Chef laughed but still handed over "a lettre de reccomendation" giving me endless opportunities if I ever wanted to continue working with something similiar.
This was the first time Chef looked me straight in the eyes and smiled.
He looked at a man with straight back and confidence in his eyes. I think he was proud.
Today, 3 years later. I live in my own apartment. I work in a nice restaurant (but nothing really special or luxary) where I really enjoy my life and the people I work with.
I have plenty of time to play Starcraft and other more competetive games which is something that I enjoy more than anything else and it is really my greatest hobby. Gaming. And during periods in my life when I havent got time for gaming I feel uncomplete...
I´m not sure anymore what triggered me to write this down but one thing I know for sure is that I tend to get very unhappy and depressed at nights. Because I have no idea how my future will look.
The main problem for me is that I live my life without any real interests or goals and I have always done that. I simply just take everything as it comes and it has come to bother me lately.
I didn´t even choose my profession out of interesst I just simply went on doing it.
In all honesty I wish that I had the same passion and strive as Chef. But I simply havn´t.