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On March 05 2012 17:31 3clipse wrote: Having lived with someone who I suspect to be bipolar, I advise you to wait this out and see if he still feels the same way tomorrow. People who get this irrationally angry over nothing are usually just in a certain mood that will pass; you didn't really DO anything wrong, and I suspect he will realize that if given some time to think about it. If he doesn't, it's probably best that you GTFO of there anyway. If this becomes a regular occurrence, I would also advise leaving, but seeing as it's the first confrontation of this kind, it may just be an anomaly.
Yea, but i would just start looking for a new place just in case.
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if he continues to be pissy with you then shout back at him you are too weak in your current form. sometimes you need to bristle up your hairs and shout back. no way are you leaving your house in the next X weeks , until you can afford it. dont even think about it. he wants you to move out? what a fucking asshole, you must be joking. if you need to tell him why you cant move out then its because YOU HAVE NOWHERE TO FUCKING GO!!! then slam your door. you dont always have to look up to people. yes you owe him some money but its not the end of the fucking world, for either of you.
by the way, just because you shouted at someone or someone shouted at you doesnt mean the end of the world. it doesnt mean you hate each other, it doesnt mean pretty much anything. you're just not used to it, give it a try and you'll realise it isnt all that bad after all. how would YOU know , anyway, since you've never done it!
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He just told me if I can get the 20 dollars by the end of the week he's going to give me a free month of rent =/ now I just have to go get 20 dollars somehow, I guess that's that. But I still don't feel secure, it's not that I am "afraid" but rather survival instincts possibly kicked in for me.
Edit:
He now wants me to sign a new six month lease...
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nevermind, it seems you already settled your problem
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I appreciate all the advice and criticism you have all given in this case. I've always been a very giving person, I'd even give the shirt off my back to help people, it's just what kind of person I am. I wasn't looking for an apology from him either, I am guessing this is his form of saying "I'm sorry, I know you've helped me a lot."
The thing is if he had kicked me out at 12 today, I'd still have done the things that he asked me to do for him. Many might think that is stupid, but it's always been my kind of work ethic/relationship ethic. I've hated being in relationships with women who whenever they are "mad" at you they wouldn't do their end of the bargain while I always did mine regardless of being mad or happy.
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Sounds like hes an ungrateful asshole, Disabled or not, no excuse for controlling mean behavior. Maybe he should consider the 70$ your behind in rent is a hell of alot cheaper then paying someone to wipe his ass for him.
EDIT: Just re-read the "go to your room part" move out and leave him to literally sit in his own shit.
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Don't sign a six month lease with him. Stay there for a month, and find another place in the meantime.
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how do you not have 20 fucking dollars? you seriously couldn't get 20 dollars from your family or friends? do you have a job?/??????
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On March 06 2012 02:34 jrkirby wrote: Don't sign a six month lease with him. Stay there for a month, and find another place in the meantime.
Just some quick legal advice from an amateur slumlord.....any lease shorter than 12 months makes it very easy to just leave should you feel the need.
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Next time you're behind his wheel-chair, say this "YOU LIKE ICECREAM DONT YOU ANDY?" EDIT: Probably a bit harsh coming to think of it. Haha. God I'm a bastard
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To Tyler, life has been pretty difficult, but at least I am only 20 dollars short and not 600 or 800+ or 2 months-6 months behind.
We just had a "meeting" it was just me and him. unfortunately he gave me crocodile tears and 'begged' for my forgiveness and requested that I not hate him. I told him straight forwardly that i do not hate people, it's not me, if I were to be shot by someone I would not hate them if they attacked my family I would not hate them. You do not need to hate someone to protect your family though, I also mentioned to him I have been attempting to be a pacifist, which I have done quite well for almost 3 years now.
Issue is, he mentioned that I questioned his beliefs, I never quested his beliefs I did try to remind him that he has stated he will try to work on his anger and also I did mention his pastor, he tried to mention the whole child support topic again stating at first that he was 'right' but I intervened and noted to him that, it does not matter to me.
There are a few issues though, I overheard him say earlier that he has two useless room mates that do nothing for him, as I've mentioned I have invested 40-60 hours a month to help him out with just being generous, yet him being ungrateful is somewhat demoralizing, it's feels worse because he bashed it saying I did nothing, instead of taking responsibility for his actions. He also stated that he'd have no issues being violent. And I can not get legal advice as I can barely come up with 20 dollars. I also don't believe a lawyer is necessary in this situation. A voice of many heads, would be better so I can see different opinions.
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you can't get evicted for being short $20 lol
it's beat on your part for being short, but fuck that. find another place in the mean time though and find a job or a better paying one
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You didn't really answer my question, what exactly IS your situation? All you do is write over and over that your situation is difficult... I understand that you're helping this man out very frequently but beyond that do you have any form of income? You seem to be his live-in nurse or aide at this point...
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Sucks. I didnt know that leg disabilities came w/ pms
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I have been in this situation before and it sucks. Tell him that you are sorry if you some how offended him, but he can't treat you like that. As others have said this sounds like a bad situation to live in, and in my experience, youll want to get out of there sooner than later. Calm the situation, and start looking for a new place. Good luck man.
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He forgave the 20 dollars I was behind apparently... Also, I've been pretty stern every time I've spoke to him. What I do for him would be considered a job to most people, and what I do for him is things I would do for anyone who wouldn't be disabled also, just to help out. So now I am not "20 dollars behind." I am fully caught up magically now. I'm trying to get employment and fix my situations now, but what happened is just not healthy.
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Am I the only person who read this and thought it was a troll thread with Op being Wilson and the cripple in the legs roommate being House lol
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On March 06 2012 08:04 WritersBlock wrote: Am I the only person who read this and thought it was a troll thread with Op being Wilson and the cripple in the legs roommate being House lol
I would hope so. I'm not a troll, I'm an anti-troller if I ever do trolling. It has to be against someone who is trolling themselves, and I wouldn't do it to my beloved TL community, you don't realize how good this community is related to others =/
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All I can say is if this guy needs 40-60 hours of your help per week, then he clearly depends on you and probably isn't in ANY position to kick you out. Realistically, you should not have to pay him any rent as you are working more than a full time job caring for him, which is something people get paid for. On top of that, being 20-70 dollars behind on rent is nothing, it is absurd to kick someone out over something that little.
If I had to guess, I might think this guy feels helpless, unable to care for himself, and is frustrated by being completely at the mercy of others and is just taking it out on you because you are letting him.
On the other hand, if he is in well enough physical condition to threaten you physically, then he does not require 40-60 hours of aid per weak and you may again be allowing him to take advantage of you, ultimately harming you both.
Standing up for yourself does not have to mean being hostile, aggressive, or uncaring.
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