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Active: 8934 users

Not sure what to do. Angry Room mate

Blogs > GertHeart
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1 2 3 Next All
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-05 07:38:07
March 05 2012 07:37 GMT
#1
My room mate just literally blew up at me. He's a disabled man, and I've been helping him out quite a bit since I've lived with him, which has cut into me being able to work myself. He just told me to make sure my items are out by 12 tomorrow and he became very controlling just now, I myself am a very calm personality, I tried to reason with him in his own ways, but instead he kept getting angrier and angrier. I will be honest though, I am behind in rent($70, I have $50 coming in though.), but I have been donating my time and helping him out about 40-60 hours a month for no wage for 6+ months, even when I had no financial difficulties I still helped him as he is disabled(limited use in his legs.), but I do that because I just do that for people always, often people take advantage of it, even if I know they are taking advantage of me I still help them while trying to explain that I am helping them, rather than they are "taking advantage of me." (I don't know how to explain that part well.)

I said usually calm, but I'm a slightly bit frantic right now. I've always been successful in my life till recently when things just started going bad and getting worse and worse, they finally seemed like they were improving once they felt they couldn't get worse, I started to think to myself "Maybe I can own my own house and car again." Right now, I'm not thinking I can anymore. The guy threatened to throw a painting at me, then a cane, then threatened to beat me up while he is disabled.

The argument began from something very simple though, he stated that child support worked a certain way and it's mandated a certain way, but I mentioned it's regulated often state to state, and can range for how much an individual would pay, as I was explained this by lawyers before (Though I am not a lawyer and judge, I like to learn a little about everything.) He stated I'm wrong, and I said "Well I can prove it if you'd like." but he stated I am wrong, and I simply said, "Well let me pull it up on the computer." "YOUR WRONG, WRONG" he started to get louder and yell, I simply tried to pull up the information then he continued to yell at me stating 'I KNOW BECAUSE I HAD TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT." I just tried to explain to him "Maybe times have changed since then, because many laws depend state to state." but then he continued to yell at me, then he started to yell at me more and told me to "GO TO YOUR ROOM, GO TO YOUR ROOM." I continued not to yell back or raise my voice at him, and tried to remind him that he said he is working on not yelling and controlling his anger and his yelling. I tried to remind him about his pastor, or anything and everything he has stated before to get him to his senses, but he was having none of it.

I have tried to be a very honest individual since I was 13 years of age when I decided on a whim "I think I'll try to just be honest." Since then I've just continued to be honest, honesty was at first a form of entertainment because I was in a home of liars, later on it just became a good part of my trait, it also was the reason I have kept jobs, and lost them.

Ah, also to state, this is our first confrontation.

TL:DR Being kicked out tomorrow because of a weird confrontation with a roomate.(Maybe kicked out?) not sure what is going on.

*****
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
theBALLS
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
Singapore2935 Posts
March 05 2012 07:42 GMT
#2
He sounds like he has issues man.

Maybe you're better off moving out.
If you lose the stick, you'll always have theBALLS.
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-05 08:07:26
March 05 2012 07:44 GMT
#3
On March 05 2012 16:42 theBALLS wrote:
He sounds like he has issues man.

Maybe you're better off moving out.


The problem is I would literally have nowhere to go, well maybe nowhere right now. The issue for me still is, wtf. I don't get this.
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
Sinensis
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States2513 Posts
March 05 2012 07:47 GMT
#4
Sounds like you might have touched on a sensitive subject with the child support thing. He sounds like he has some issues you probably don't want to be around anyway.
papaz
Profile Joined December 2009
Sweden4149 Posts
March 05 2012 08:00 GMT
#5
In the long run you are better off staying somewhere else. Even if you manage to keep staying there, try finding something else. You don't wanna staty with a guy like that.
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
March 05 2012 08:18 GMT
#6
Wow 3 people have stated pretty much the same thing, I'm kinda amazed nobody has stated anything else.
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
Cyber_Cheese
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Australia3615 Posts
March 05 2012 08:20 GMT
#7
As these things go, I don't believe this is the whole story.
Still, you're definitely better off elsewhere.
The moment you lose confidence in yourself, is the moment the world loses it's confidence in you.
FreshNoThyme
Profile Joined March 2008
United States356 Posts
March 05 2012 08:21 GMT
#8
On March 05 2012 16:37 GertHeart wrote:
My room mate just literally blew up at me..


REALLY?...

Come on, man.
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
March 05 2012 08:22 GMT
#9
On March 05 2012 17:20 Cyber_Cheese wrote:
As these things go, I don't believe this is the whole story.
Still, you're definitely better off elsewhere.


Whole story is sketchy to me also, but I have mentioned as much as I can remember right now including me being behind on rent. Which if anything stemmed it would be from that, I have been very tidy and even cleaning after the guy. Helping him in and out of the house almost everyday, grocery shopping and carrying his groceries also.
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
March 05 2012 08:23 GMT
#10
On March 05 2012 17:21 RANDOMCL wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 05 2012 16:37 GertHeart wrote:
My room mate just literally blew up at me..


REALLY?...

Come on, man.


What should I have said?
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
Fishgle
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States2174 Posts
March 05 2012 08:24 GMT
#11
On March 05 2012 17:18 GertHeart wrote:
Wow 3 people have stated pretty much the same thing, I'm kinda amazed nobody has stated anything else.


Well they do have a point. Getting angry about how child support laws function is comically absurd, and the rest of the stuff makes mr. roommate seem completely awful to live with.
aka ChillyGonzalo / GnozL
cmen15
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States1519 Posts
March 05 2012 08:28 GMT
#12
Hey man sorry to hear about that, I think there is still a chance that maybe tomorrow this guy will wake up and change his mind. However if he doesn't you should wake up kinda early and figure out your shit ha. Is there any family you can stay with until you find a new place??
Greed leads to just about all losses.
Nabes
Profile Joined November 2010
Canada1800 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-05 08:29:44
March 05 2012 08:29 GMT
#13
On March 05 2012 17:23 GertHeart wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 05 2012 17:21 RANDOMCL wrote:
On March 05 2012 16:37 GertHeart wrote:
My room mate just literally blew up at me..


REALLY?...

Come on, man.


What should I have said?


My room mate just literally blew up at me..

i dunno if thats what he was getting at
3clipse
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
Canada2555 Posts
March 05 2012 08:31 GMT
#14
Having lived with someone who I suspect to be bipolar, I advise you to wait this out and see if he still feels the same way tomorrow. People who get this irrationally angry over nothing are usually just in a certain mood that will pass; you didn't really DO anything wrong, and I suspect he will realize that if given some time to think about it. If he doesn't, it's probably best that you GTFO of there anyway. If this becomes a regular occurrence, I would also advise leaving, but seeing as it's the first confrontation of this kind, it may just be an anomaly.
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
March 05 2012 08:32 GMT
#15
On March 05 2012 17:28 cmen15 wrote:
Hey man sorry to hear about that, I think there is still a chance that maybe tomorrow this guy will wake up and change his mind. However if he doesn't you should wake up kinda early and figure out your shit ha. Is there any family you can stay with until you find a new place??


Unfortunately there isn't my family is in WA, I am in AZ. A fellow friend gamer from LoL said he could maybe help me, not sure? but that's nor here nor there obviously. He said he may know some people here in AZ that could help me.
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
March 05 2012 08:33 GMT
#16
On March 05 2012 17:31 3clipse wrote:
Having lived with someone who I suspect to be bipolar, I advise you to wait this out and see if he still feels the same way tomorrow. People who get this irrationally angry over nothing are usually just in a certain mood that will pass; you didn't really DO anything wrong, and I suspect he will realize that if given some time to think about it. If he doesn't, it's probably best that you GTFO of there anyway. If this becomes a regular occurrence, I would also advise leaving, but seeing as it's the first confrontation of this kind, it may just be an anomaly.


This is what I thought too, maybe it may blow over, and it's the first confrontation. But a lot of the people saying otherwise. And I will make this comment about TL, TL doesn't have the dumbest people in the world, the people here are usually pretty intelligent overall.
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
Silvertine
Profile Joined February 2012
United States509 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-05 08:37:55
March 05 2012 08:37 GMT
#17
On March 05 2012 16:37 GertHeart wrote:
"GO TO YOUR ROOM, GO TO YOUR ROOM."

Should have screamed "I HATE YOU, I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN" and slammed the door.
GertHeart
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
United States631 Posts
March 05 2012 08:39 GMT
#18
On March 05 2012 17:37 Silvertine wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 05 2012 16:37 GertHeart wrote:
"GO TO YOUR ROOM, GO TO YOUR ROOM."

Should have screamed "I HATE YOU, I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN" and slammed the door.


He actually ended up slamming my door, also his dog was afraid to approach him, I had to carry his dog out for him calmly, it kept running back into my room over and over. In AZ slamming a door is considered Domestic Violence.
He who conquers the past rules the future, He who conquers the future rules the past. - C&C Red Alert
Azzur
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Australia6267 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-05 08:57:10
March 05 2012 08:48 GMT
#19
He shouldn't explode on to you like that, but I feel sorry for him. Actually, you are wrong - child support is a very punishing thing on an individual.

What happens is that a judge will mandate a certain amount of child support. If the man's circumstances change (e.g. getting disabled), the amount of money needed to be paid doesn't decrease. The authorities come hunting for people in such situations because the amount of revenue they get depends on the amount of money they manage to collect. They are very tough on such people, even threatening imprisonment for failure to pay. This is why they don't care about child custody violations (because they get no money) but are so stringent on child support.

Such a situation is enough to drive people insane.
zalz
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Netherlands3704 Posts
March 05 2012 08:50 GMT
#20
If a roomate would seriously tell me to "go to my room," I would push them off a flight of stairs. I am not a violent person but people that think they can be that disrespectful to a peer are the worst.

I don't know why anyone would stand for such an insult.


Then again, I wouldn't stand for people being late on rent either. So I guess I would kick the both of you from the appartment.
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