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Touch
Canada475 Posts
On February 10 2011 00:19 HardCorey wrote: Hahahahaha...win, fucking win.Thinking the word condom was short for condominium. I got in a fight against a fat guy and lost. This guy was shorter, but twice as wide, had arms as thick as my thighs. Whole school watched us. | ||
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luckyseven
179 Posts
On February 10 2011 08:15 MrBarryObama wrote: Got caught staring at my english teachers huge tits... twice. god, we had a pretty old and very large french teacher (who was super nice, think "grandmother" ) but i started to get obsessed with her ennnorrrmous fat grandmother tits. really disturbing and blush-inducing until age of 7 (?) i wet the bed frequently (what the fuck, gotta look this up now). once i done it when i was staying with a friend, sleeping with him in his bed. i got up at like 7am and found his father and started crying, "i wet the bed waahh", grrrr.... i used to shit my pants constantly at school. i think. musta been until like 6? luckily i didnt become "self aware" until i was like 14, so i guess i didnt get embarrassed, just severely distressed. idk, i dont really have memories of my childhood for some reason | ||
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wurm
Philippines2296 Posts
+ Show Spoiler + Like an idiot, I raised my hand. Took a year for me to live that down. GF was nice to me about it though. haha | ||
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Deadlyhazard
United States1177 Posts
+ Show Spoiler + There used to be a guy at my highschool who would place his turds in people's backpacks. On other days, he would smear his shit on the wall and nobody knew who did it. The police were there all the time trying to get samples but for some reason they just couldn't find out who was spreading this problem and no cameras were set up in the area. Thus, becomes the story of the poop bandit. So after-awhile of this going on, shit being plastered everywhere, I heard a rustle in my backpack. Immediately I looked around and saw the poop bandit placing a HUGE shit in my backpack and he had a cold look of pure terror. I yell, it's the SHIT BANDIT! and everyone looks and sees the brown on his hand. He was caught brown handed. The teacher was like HOLY SHIT and called the security as quick as the shit bandit's turd being slipped into a backpack (or out of his anus). The kid was expelled and I'm pretty sure the rumors of him going to some sort of mental institution was true. + Show Spoiler + Another story, involving my teachers. I was pretty famous at the school among my friends for the comics I drew. One of them was my teacher, Ms. Griffin. I drew her as a griffin but instead of a bird's head I drew her face on it. What would happen in the comic is that she would fly away with students in her claws and drop them off at her nest, at the roof of the school....and in the beginning of the comic we would be stuck at in-school-suspension (which was apparently a prison underneath the school). Anyway, it would be an epic adventure out of the ISS prison up the final battle with Ms Griffin. And on the last page of the battle I drew her with HUGE saggy boobs flopping everywhere in the wind as she was fighting and something to do with me saying, "DIE YE BITCH!" The teacher found it after it fell out of my backpack and as she began to read it her eyes were widening. The entire class was looking at her when she started to read aloud some words. She had the most PISSED off look, I honestly thought red chilis were about to shoot out between her flabs of fat. She exclaims, YOUR PARENTS WILL BE HEARING ABOUT THIS and calls a security guard to escort me to the administrator jerk. OH my god it was so awkward. + Show Spoiler + But not as awkward as the next bit....I drew some girl in my class in 7th grade while everyone was huddled at the front and crowded around me (but no one was paying attention to anything but the board). I placed the picture on her desk (which included visions of her eyeballs being boobs and her tits were apparently giant penises with jizz shooting out). Right as I look back everyone is staring at me. I'm like, HOLY SHIT. Now THAT was so awkward that I high-tailed it out of the class and didn't come back for a couple days. + Show Spoiler + The next story is a bit funnier but not really awkward. This Spanish teacher of mine in 8th grade used to have this BAYELL (as she would pronounce it) that she would ring when someone got something correct. Well one day she wasn't paying attention and I grabbed it and threw it off the 2nd story window. She hears the ring coming from outside and looks to her podium. WHERE MY BAYELL!?!??!?! she screams and the entire class is roaring in laughter. So she disappears from the room and everyone is patting me on the back. From outside we can hear a faint "MY BAYELLL!!!!!" and THAT set everyone off really fast in lolling. Then when we heard the ringing we were like GOD DAMNIT. | ||
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Assault_1
Canada1950 Posts
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luckyseven
179 Posts
On February 10 2011 08:28 Fates wrote: I think in like 6th grade or 7th, I was going to gym. I always put deodorant on as a precautionary thing, but I had never really experienced body odor before. So I had run out the previous day, and forgot to bring a new stick, and was like "Ah well fuck it, I've never gotten BO before." Sure enough, I was smelling pretty ripe after gym was over. I was kinda panicking in the locker room, asking everyone if they had some axe, or spray, but do to them being dicks, everyone had "run out" that day. My friends offered their deodorant sticks to me, but I was, and still am, a huge germaphobe, so I declined. I figured I could make to through the next 2 classes no problem, I'll just tuck my arms in really close to my body, and trap the smell. So I go into my english class, and within maybe 2 minutes, the room just reeks. Everyone who walked in all were all disgusted and laughing, and I had never felt more embarrassed. As far as I know, nobody knew it was me, as I was towards to back, and the closest person was 3 seats away. But of course, it was the hottest girl in class. So I tried to play it off cool, and proclaim my innocence, and told her "Man it really stinks, wonder who it is." The class lasted for fucking ever, and I only had 1 more to go, and it was science. Now my science teacher was pretty cute for a teacher, and we got along really well. And that day just happened to be demo day. As if I was paying for a crime I never committed, she felt obligated to call on me to be her demo partner in front of the whole class. At this point, I didn't care anymore, I just wanted to go home. The class finished, and I think my teacher knew the BO was emanating from me, but she didn't say anything about it. I just remember those 2 hours being the worst, and most humiliating moments of my life in school. Needless to say, I never forgot my deodorant again. omg, this is the worse thing ever. you need to have experienced it to understand. maybe 2-4 times its happened that i suddenly realise i stink, freak out, and spend the rest of the day trying to lean back or stand an extra metre away from everyone....damn almost as bad is when you're with someone who stinks, like a colleague or friend. you're like HOLY FUCK WHY DIDNT YOU WASH but cant say anything and are trying not to frown at them or get TOO far away from them....omg | ||
Sigrun
United States1654 Posts
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Snipekiller430
United States34 Posts
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luckyseven
179 Posts
On February 09 2011 14:05 Quake48 wrote: Sophmore year in HS I had a crush on this girl and we were chatting in class and her friend comes along and sits by us. She asks me if I can message her leg. She is a cheerleader so of course I want to touch her legs. As I message her legs she begins making soft moans. I get aroused by this. I squeeze her calf as hard as I can and she lets out a very loud moan. Whole class looks at me and general vicinity of the moan. Everyone is Silent. Make awquard eye contact with teacher. Teacher asks me if my packet is done. I say no. I pick up my pencil and complete my packed. Nobody talks for the rest of the class period. the girl I had a crush on stopped talking to me  Also last month this girl started playing footsie with me but I realized her feet were all black from her flip flops. I tell her to stop. She stops. I finish my packet in silence. dude what is a packet? | ||
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M155_G33k
United States470 Posts
On February 10 2011 12:29 Snipekiller430 wrote: So my family finally bought a laptop and my dad seems to be the one who uses it a lot. My dad has a weird habit, he likes to drink milk or something when he's working and every time he spills some on the laptop. It is really annoying, sometimes when the milk settles the keys become sticky and gives off a strange smell. The keys on my new laptop are like rubbing off from leaving the milk on the keys. Man, I remember one day in school I took the laptop because we had a study hall period and I had to ask the teacher to help me open the laptop because it was so sticky I couldn't open it. So... many... jokes... I'll leave it though. I know what you mean though, I use to let my little sister borrow my computer because she would break hers constantly (Once deleted her entire reg edit files because she listened to 4chan). She would eat food and drop chips into it constantly. I would have to take the keyboard apart just to clean it out sometimes because it would actually get that full T_T | ||
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Disregard
China10252 Posts
A pile of worksheets... | ||
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DrivE
United States2554 Posts
So when we were in 7th grade, me and my friend were in the locker room, changing into PE clothes and getting ready for PE. Well, my friend couldn't find his clothes in his locker (I think he forgot to lock his locker), and searched pretty frantically for it. When it was time to go to class, he still couldn't find it, so I just went to class without him. Ten minutes into the class, he walks in the gym holding a shirt covered in piss. Apparently some kid took his shirt and threw it in the urinal. The PE teacher took one look at him and had that "wtf do i do face". There was piss dripping from his shirt so the teacher just told him to gtfo and "get rid of that thing" Everyone stayed far away from him during P.E. from then on. | ||
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Quake48
United States68 Posts
lmfao | ||
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don_kyuhote
3006 Posts
During lab, when we were learning about the bond angle and crystal structure and etc, we had to replicate molecules using styrofoams balls and toothpicks. My friend was unsure about something, so he went up her, showed her his model and asked "Is this right?" And she replied "Why are you holding your balls at me?" You could tell my friend was trying so hard to not burst out laughing. | ||
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Drowsy
United States4876 Posts
On February 10 2011 10:11 phantaxx wrote: During high school one of the male teachers got caught on an adult site at school, so they investigated his computer and found out that he and some female teachers had been making pornos together in the classrooms. Didn't find out how it ended but it was interesting none the less. rofl that is completely awesome. | ||
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Roe
Canada6002 Posts
On February 10 2011 12:19 Deadlyhazard wrote: My Stories + Show Spoiler + There used to be a guy at my highschool who would place his turds in people's backpacks. On other days, he would smear his shit on the wall and nobody knew who did it. The police were there all the time trying to get samples but for some reason they just couldn't find out who was spreading this problem and no cameras were set up in the area. Thus, becomes the story of the poop bandit. So after-awhile of this going on, shit being plastered everywhere, I heard a rustle in my backpack. Immediately I looked around and saw the poop bandit placing a HUGE shit in my backpack and he had a cold look of pure terror. I yell, it's the SHIT BANDIT! and everyone looks and sees the brown on his hand. He was caught brown handed. The teacher was like HOLY SHIT and called the security as quick as the shit bandit's turd being slipped into a backpack (or out of his anus). The kid was expelled and I'm pretty sure the rumors of him going to some sort of mental institution was true. + Show Spoiler + Another story, involving my teachers. I was pretty famous at the school among my friends for the comics I drew. One of them was my teacher, Ms. Griffin. I drew her as a griffin but instead of a bird's head I drew her face on it. What would happen in the comic is that she would fly away with students in her claws and drop them off at her nest, at the roof of the school....and in the beginning of the comic we would be stuck at in-school-suspension (which was apparently a prison underneath the school). Anyway, it would be an epic adventure out of the ISS prison up the final battle with Ms Griffin. And on the last page of the battle I drew her with HUGE saggy boobs flopping everywhere in the wind as she was fighting and something to do with me saying, "DIE YE BITCH!" The teacher found it after it fell out of my backpack and as she began to read it her eyes were widening. The entire class was looking at her when she started to read aloud some words. She had the most PISSED off look, I honestly thought red chilis were about to shoot out between her flabs of fat. She exclaims, YOUR PARENTS WILL BE HEARING ABOUT THIS and calls a security guard to escort me to the administrator jerk. OH my god it was so awkward. + Show Spoiler + But not as awkward as the next bit....I drew some girl in my class in 7th grade while everyone was huddled at the front and crowded around me (but no one was paying attention to anything but the board). I placed the picture on her desk (which included visions of her eyeballs being boobs and her tits were apparently giant penises with jizz shooting out). Right as I look back everyone is staring at me. I'm like, HOLY SHIT. Now THAT was so awkward that I high-tailed it out of the class and didn't come back for a couple days. + Show Spoiler + The next story is a bit funnier but not really awkward. This Spanish teacher of mine in 8th grade used to have this BAYELL (as she would pronounce it) that she would ring when someone got something correct. Well one day she wasn't paying attention and I grabbed it and threw it off the 2nd story window. She hears the ring coming from outside and looks to her podium. WHERE MY BAYELL!?!??!?! she screams and the entire class is roaring in laughter. So she disappears from the room and everyone is patting me on the back. From outside we can hear a faint "MY BAYELLL!!!!!" and THAT set everyone off really fast in lolling. Then when we heard the ringing we were like GOD DAMNIT. I loved the poop story  in fact, i seem to love all poop stories(if ya have any more <3) | ||
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Mid[N]ight-
United States155 Posts
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MangoTango
United States3670 Posts
Wait no, that wasn't me. | ||
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LazyMacro
976 Posts
On April 03 2009 05:40 DreaM)XeRO wrote: So uh, is it just me or is that atypical? I mean, being naked with other students of the opposite gender?This was during freshman year of high school. There is a tradition for all guys going to states in swimming to either a) shave all hair completly off the body (ALL) or b) dye hair blond, but still shave the whole body The states crew decided that we would chose the lesser of two evils we chose b. So the night before states comes around, and we have a pasta party (Pasta is high in carbs. It's a swimming tradition) Afterwords we all (boys and girls) decided it was time for the men to shave All of the dudes got naked one by one, as the girls would soap and shave their bodies So it comes to be my turn. The senior captain takes one look at me and says "omg Sean is MINE". The captain was pretty cute so i had no problem with it. So i strip down and get under the shower for a few minutes. I reach for the soap to start lathering myself and i find that it's gone. Kathryn (the captain's name) had the soap in her hand. She smiles and starts to rub the soap all over my chest and back. She reaches down near my crotch and ...naturally i have a boner. She giggles and winks. I don't know what to do. She whispers "you're really cute" smiles. Then i was DONE. I literally jizzed all over the place. Like...fucking mt.fucking.vesuvius. It was redic. Her eyes went huge, and her mouth formed into a little o of suprise. She wiped it off, and left. I had to shave myself. When i got out..Everyone started cracking up at me... Maybe it's just where I grew up but that would've been pretty fucking taboo. | ||
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Gao Xi
Hong Kong5178 Posts
On February 11 2011 07:15 MangoTango wrote: One time, I got caught masturbating in an airplane bathroom by a stewardess and put a napkin on my dick and then I said "it is what it is." Wait no, that wasn't me. Sounds like it was hawt. | ||
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