On September 28 2008 13:27 Ilikestarcraft wrote:
and your type is?
and your type is?
Totally bangin' hot.
Jeez ilikesc you spend too much time on this thread
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Equinox_kr
United States7395 Posts
On September 28 2008 13:27 Ilikestarcraft wrote: and your type is? Totally bangin' hot. Jeez ilikesc you spend too much time on this thread | ||
Warrior Madness
Canada3791 Posts
On September 29 2008 07:29 CapO wrote: wtf, you cummed because u got excited while u were fingering her? or were you jerking off at the same time? weren't ur friends sitting right next to u guys? Well, you just have to put yourself in my shoes. Like any other 8th grader I jerked off prolifically, but the excitement of for reals touching a girl, of smelling her, the sensation of my hand being squeezed between her legs was like a whole nother level! I jizzed and it was more intense and better than anything I had done solo, even though she didn't even TOUCH me... Oh and the guy sat 2-3 chairs away from us and minded his own business, while the rest of the girls sat at the front row (we were at the back). On September 29 2008 12:02 Hippopotamus wrote: You know there's a conspicuous lack of mention of you changing your underwear, considering you creamed yourself twice. Only came once, at the movie theater so I couldn't change my underwear or anything. On September 29 2008 12:14 il0seonpurpose wrote: warrior, nice story. did you ever end up kissing her though? and i guess if it smells like fish she uses her pussy alot right? Nope. I regret it to this day. My first kiss, unfortunately, came later that year. You see girls are always scheming, these girls however were snow beasts, and I ended up making out with this chubby, whiny girl who had a crush on me since grade 5. | ||
il0seonpurpose
Korea (South)5638 Posts
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KOFgokuon
United States14892 Posts
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Ilikestarcraft
Korea (South)17722 Posts
On September 29 2008 12:33 Equinox_kr wrote: Totally bangin' hot. Jeez ilikesc you spend too much time on this thread i spend too much time on tl in general these days ![]() | ||
MamiyaOtaru
United States1687 Posts
9th grade biology, the teacher is droning on about the digestive tract, the stomach, duodenum, cardiac sphincter etc. To my left is a kid named James, a complete dork who always ate chips that smelled so bad they made me want to throw up. As usual I was ignoring him and chilling with Matt, who sat on the other side. We were joking around and laughing about something, and the teacher asked us what was so funny. Before we can say anything James blurts out "they thought you said cardiac stinker" and cracks up. There's this horrible frozen moment where the whole class looks at us like we are the dumbest most immature people in the world and I'm just mortified. "That's not what we were laughing at" sounds weak and I'm pretty sure no one believed me. That class sucked anyway. I got the highest score in the school on the final but got an F for the course because I didn't believe in homework and the teacher was a dick. Next year: new school, new country. I always used to lose watches, so when I got a new one I got in the habit of never taking it off. In the computer lab there's this hot chick I wanted to talk to. I'm a pussy, so I needed to manufacture an excuse. I decide I'll ask her what time it is. Of course I have to take off the watch for that to be plausible. I peel it off for the first time in a week or two and suddenly there's this terrible shit smell. Apparently skin doesn't age well without being washed or exposed to the air D: I never spoke to her again. School trip to Holland: we're taking the overnight ferry across the channel. I've been on them before and I know the toilets in the cabins are scary as hell. They are like an instant vacuum, sucking down anything in the bowl in the blink of an eye. One of the guys goes in to take a leak. When he's done I'm like "check this out" and I engage the vacuum flush. He just looks at me and is like "dude, you looked at my pee". WTF was I doing ![]() RE: ferries and pee - we were hanging around on the deck and there's this fierce wind. One of the other guys in the trip decides he's going to take a piss. He's not dumb enough to pee into the wind of course, he pees with it. But the wind blasting around him created an eddy and the piss is curving back and headed straight at him. Of course he can't just stop. I about died seeing him dance around trying to keep it off his pants and shoes. WTF that trip and seeing pee Fark now all I can think about is toilets. Track trip to London, I'm in a stall trying to lose a few pounds before the high jump. One of the sprinters gets in the next stall and immediately starts ripping off toilet paper. I'm like "what are you doing with toilet paper already?" He told me it was to keep the water in the bowl from splashing on him when he let one go. The Moar You Know! Back at the school: there's a new building my senior year. Between classes I head to the John for a #2. I'm sitting there and two girls walk in talking to each other. Oh shit I'm in the wrong room. This would never have happened if I was in for #1 ![]() These are just getting dumber, but this is cathartic. Freshman year in college: the whole floor is gathered in the hall listening to the dorm mother. I've got serious gas (cafeteria food). I wait for her to reach a dramatic pause in whatever uplifting story she's telling and in the dead silence rip a huge one. Jared busts up and everyone thought it was him for the rest of the year. Fun Fact: Napoleon Dynamite was there (well the actor who would one day play him). | ||
jello_biafra
United Kingdom6632 Posts
On September 29 2008 21:23 MamiyaOtaru wrote: RE: ferries and pee - we were hanging around on the deck and there's this fierce wind. One of the other guys in the trip decides he's going to take a piss. He's not dumb enough to pee into the wind of course, he pees with it. But the wind blasting around him created an eddy and the piss is curving back and headed straight at him. Of course he can't just stop. I about died seeing him dance around trying to keep it off his pants and shoes. WTF that trip and seeing pee haha what a fool to do such a thing, must have been hilarious to see. | ||
kpcrew
Korea (South)1071 Posts
On September 29 2008 21:42 jello_biafra wrote: Show nested quote + On September 29 2008 21:23 MamiyaOtaru wrote: RE: ferries and pee - we were hanging around on the deck and there's this fierce wind. One of the other guys in the trip decides he's going to take a piss. He's not dumb enough to pee into the wind of course, he pees with it. But the wind blasting around him created an eddy and the piss is curving back and headed straight at him. Of course he can't just stop. I about died seeing him dance around trying to keep it off his pants and shoes. WTF that trip and seeing pee haha what a fool to do such a thing, must have been hilarious to see. thats why we invented bathrooms | ||
TS-Rupbar
Sweden1089 Posts
Then comes this idiot up and steals one of our two balls and just keeps running around the hall. My friend then gets fed up and kicks the other ball pretty hard right into his face. The idiot just falls down and then there's blood coming out from his nose and he begins to sob, while just lying there. My friend goes up and apologises to the idiot, but he just tells him he's fine and keeps on lying there. Now, our gym hall in high school could be split in two with this curtain thingie and I was talking to some friends from the class on the other side. Someone spots the idiot lying on the floor, just sobbing and refusing to get up even though it was like five minutes ago he was hit in the face with the ball. It must've hurt, but he was really dumb to just keep laying there while everyone was watching. He was getting help, but just told everyone to mind their own business. The one who spot the guy sobbing on the floor screams to his whole class that there's an idiot lying and bleeding on the floor. Everyone rushes in to our room and they start laughing. All the while, we were listening to this cheesy music and an old Swedish class called "du gamle indian", or "old Indian", or whatever. A band of 5-6 guys then proceed to start dancing like Indians around the guy on the floor. I was feeling very guilty for not stopping them, but it seemed rather funny at the time, so I couldn't help smiling. Luckily, the teacher came walked in quite soon after they started dancing. He starts screaming like hell and chases the dancing dudes out of the gym hall. My friend got sent to the principal's office for having kicked the ball in the idiot's face. This was probably the guy's reason for just staying there and that was also the reason why everyone hated him. He always did stupid shit to piss people off and when they got back at him, he ran to the teachers and told them what they had done to him. The teachers knew he was a retard, but they always had to side with the weak guy, so everyone else always got yelled at for stopping the idiot to ruin stuff. However, I still feel a bit bad whenever I think about that. No one deserves to get rain danced around while laying on the floor, crying in their own nose blood. | ||
Chika
United States74 Posts
So i am walking through the halls going to my second class and the next thing i know... My pants are around my ankles.... I mean it ruined my reputation for the whole 7/8th grade year. I always got made fun of for being the girl who couldnt keep her pants up He did it continuously for about 6 months. ![]() | ||
arb
Noobville17920 Posts
So i was getting stuff out of my locker(Bottom locker) something brushes on my back. i here a "heehee" turn around and get a face full of dick D: | ||
skuj
United States302 Posts
On September 30 2008 06:55 arb wrote: This happened today! So i was getting stuff out of my locker(Bottom locker) something brushes on my back. i here a "heehee" turn around and get a face full of dick D: did he get a dick full of fist? | ||
arb
Noobville17920 Posts
On September 30 2008 06:56 skuj wrote: Show nested quote + On September 30 2008 06:55 arb wrote: This happened today! So i was getting stuff out of my locker(Bottom locker) something brushes on my back. i here a "heehee" turn around and get a face full of dick D: did he get a dick full of fist? no he got a "DUDE WHAT THE FUCK" then me screaming and running.. | ||
ktp
United States797 Posts
"that irradiates the hell out of me!" Most people couldn't catch the slip up but some do and asked me what I meant. All I could say was "science vessal duh." After that I could never say the word irritate correctly. Now for a serious story. In forth grade I was playing four square during recess with my friends. One of them bounces the ball really far and I almost catch it, but a black kid was blocking my way. My friend ask why I didn't get the ball, so I said really loud "stupid nigger was in my way." I don't even remember how I learned that word, but that was the first time I've ever used in public. Then the black kid turns around and looks at me. He was much taller and stronger than I, and could have kicked my ass right then and there. But he just looked at me and walked away. My friend tried to help me by saying in an awkward way "yea...you heard what he said!" I didn't know what I had done until I got older. Looking back at it now I feel terrible about it. I've seen the black kid a few times when we were in high school. I don't know if he remembers the incident or not. | ||
Folca
2235 Posts
On September 29 2008 08:26 Pads wrote: Show nested quote + Before leaving the theatre I went to the washroom, and my hand felt like it was covered in sweat. I thought to myself "Why not?" So I took a sniff... I was immediately taken a back by how strong the smell was. It smelled like fish... and I was like "What the fuck?." - The end OH MY GOD ROFL This has got to be remembered, holy shit that was hilarious | ||
Chika
United States74 Posts
When i was a senior in high school i was taking this PE class and we were doing something called "Rocky's" where you sit in t V sit and the person next to you slaps you on the stomach, causing your abs to contract.. The kid next to me was a freshman and he was really nervous to hit my in the stomach So nervous that he missed and slapped me in the boob... LOL He was so mortified and the whole class laugh and i just hit the floor and laughed at it.. Needless to say he never even talked to me again.... LOL! | ||
BuGzlToOnl
United States5918 Posts
Back in my old days of high school, sophomore year there was this girl so sat next to me during class. I didn't really like her, but apparently she like me. We did talk and such from time to time, but never did anything outside school. I'm really, really, really, bad on picking up signals from girls, I mean I really don't have any sexual desire to be with them and I just prefer female company over male company (no I'm not gay either). So if she hinted towards her liking me I would have never been able to interpret these "signals" in such a way. Anyways one day during Spanish II class as it was about to end she throws a neatly folded note onto my desk. I look at her and she seemed a little nervous as I picked it up. (An important part of this story is her friend who sat in front of me. Before class would start she would sit sideways on her desk so she would be facing her and me and we'd chit chat until the bell rang and class would begin.) So I open the note and I read the following, "why haven't you asked her out yet?". Now it was impeccable timing of the teacher to end class five minutes early on that particular day. Once the teacher was done her friend turned around and smiled, I'm fairly sure she knew what was going on. So me deciding to be "flirty" gave a wink and a "sexy" wave thinking this might have been a joke because we never really talked to each other. Her friend responds with a "hi" along with a smile and looks directly besides me at her friend who liked me. I'm pretty sure she was in on it as well. Directly after the wink and "sexy" wave to her friend and then look over at the girl sitting next to me (the one that liked me) and she gives me this pale look and her face of shock/wtf and in my mind I'm like "wat?". Nothing was said in the following moments just very awkward moments of looking back and forth between the three of us over 9000 times without saying one word to each other. I then had the brilliant idea of rereading the note and among closer inspection it actually read, "why haven't you asked ME out yet". This one word alone made all the difference in this situation which would lead to the rest of the week being completely awkward and silent among the three of us. I said to myself oh "oh why haven't I asked you out yet" and a very low whisper voice that wouldn't be heard. The bell rang shortly after and they made a run for it before I had the chance to explain myself. The next couple of days she COMPLETELY ignored me didn't say hi, didn't look at me, didn't even acknowledge my existence. This only went on for a while until we slowly got back to normal, but I never explained to her that I misread the not because I was scared she would ask me out again and I didn't really like her and didn't want to "reject" her twice in the same class. | ||
H
New Zealand6138 Posts
On September 30 2008 06:55 arb wrote: This happened today! So i was getting stuff out of my locker(Bottom locker) something brushes on my back. i here a "heehee" turn around and get a face full of dick D: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA | ||
SilverSkyLark
Philippines8437 Posts
Me and my friends were outside our math classroom and I was practicing to wear a tie (I needed it for a presentation in my english class) since its been so long since I have done one.....so after successful trials, we got retarded and started to make fun of ourselves, I said something like "I has weapons" (I intend to make my english bad for humors sake) while flailing the tie. My friends dared me to go into a literature or an english class, stand in front, then flail the tie like a mad person and dash out, of course I didn't do that, the teacher will kill me. We still got a lot of laughs while doing those stuff.... | ||
29 fps
United States5720 Posts
On September 30 2008 04:47 TS-Rupbar wrote: However, I still feel a bit bad whenever I think about that. No one deserves to get rain danced around while laying on the floor, crying in their own nose blood. i think this is an exception. i mean, if he could get up on his own will and clean himself up, he should have. if he said he was fine and he really wasn't, then he was lying, and deserves it because he could've gotten some help if he said he wasn't. five minutes or more on the floor? it must've been a REALLY REALLY hard hit to stay down that long. but it turns out he was just being a dick, so yes, he deserved it. | ||
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