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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On March 01 2014 09:21 fishjie wrote:
easier said than done but you should relax. just have fun. you're putting huge pressure on yourself because in your head, you've already built her up to be "the one". to get around this, you should be going out on dates with multiple girls, then you won't take anything so seriously. ironically, by taking things so seriously in the beginning, you're crippling your chances of getting serious later on down the road.
as for friendzone, just try to kiss her at the end of the date when you drop her off. the kiss will tell you everything you need to know. kiss even if you think she's not into you. i've made out with girls who i thought were bored because they were so quiet, but in hindsight it was because they were nervous and actually liked me. And i've gotten shot down by girls who i thought we were having a good time together, but turns out they saw me as a fun guy who would make a good friend. so, if she kisses you back, boom you're in. if she gives you the cheek, then thank her for a good time and date other women, wait for her to call you again. if she pushes you away, then lulz, politely apologize and never talk to her again.
Some of the most solid advice I've seen in this thread. If you want it you just have to go for it, if you fall into the friendzone it's because you never made a move and found out whether she felt the same. She's not going to do it for you, don't ever count on that.
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How do I seduce Apollo? 
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On March 03 2014 09:47 apolloismyjimmy wrote:How do I seduce Apollo?
Get in line.
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Ok so I have a bit of a problem in front of me. I am not giving it a whole bunch of my thoughts and am happy with myself for not stressing out over it like I probably normally would. I have more important things at this point in my life, but I am figuring it wouldn't hurt to try a little bit in the situation. So here it is:
There is this girl at my high school who is a Junior. (I am a Sophomore) I have a few classes with her and she seems like a genuinely nice person who has a great personality. I like to be around her and have thought before to myself that I wouldn't mind being more than friends. She seems to be a bit of a party person and hangs out with people who I don't at school. They seem like the group that would be "too cool" to hang out with me although I am no chump myself, but I am simply an underclassman. I am not part of any partying scene. I find other things to do as I don't drink, smoke, or have sex (or kissed a girl for that matter), even though I am perfectly fine with those things, I just don't prioritize them. All in all I just don't feel like I would fit in with her group, although I feel like I would fit in great with her. Should I even try to pursue it, or should I just wait for another girl to come along and not emotionally invest myself with her and hurt myself in the long run if it doesn't work out?
Edit: Just to make it clear, I'm not bashing at all on how people live.
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On March 02 2014 05:53 KaiserKieran wrote:
Ok guys update time!
So I went to a school basketbal game yesterday and I saw her there so we chatted some and I stay with her and chill with like the group. Yay! So it's at the end of the game and she leaves and I'm just thinking to my self "I can't let another girl get away" so I go outside to try and track her down and ask her out on like a date
(So kind of spontaneous haha) but I can't find her..
So I'm out in the cold looking for her about to give up and she comes out with her friend and after talked with her I ask if she is actually free Saturday (today) and ask if she wants to see a movie with me and she says yes that'd be fun.
(fuck yeahhhhhhhhh!!!!!)
What a burst of adrenaline I had man lol.
She then texts me that she is actually busy today and can't hangout so we should reschedule and I'm just thinking to myself how to go from here. I'm thinking something like go out into the city and watch a movie and then my parents can drive us home or we can walk around a little bit (but it is really cold outside so idk about being outside too much)
So this isn't like filled with drama or anything but I guess it's a step in the right direction I hope even though idk were not like "serious" or anything.
Her wanting to reschedule is a good sign, my friend.
The ultimate "I'm not interested in hanging out but don't want to come out and say it" line, in my experience, is "I'm really busy these days. I'll let you know when we can get together."
I've had that one used on me several times, and I've used it as well. It's the final nail in the coffin for potential potential relationship.
On March 03 2014 09:47 apolloismyjimmy wrote:How do I seduce Apollo?
Learn to fly the golden chariot across the sky every day. that'll do the trick.
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On March 03 2014 11:11 autoexec wrote:
All in all I just don't feel like I would fit in with her group, although I feel like I would fit in great with her.
You mean you would fit great IN her right ?
On March 03 2014 11:11 autoexec wrote:
Should I even try to pursue it, or should I just wait for another girl to come along and not emotionally invest myself with her and hurt myself in the long run if it doesn't work out?
You've got it reversed. You invest emotionally after it starts working, not before and then get crushed when baseless fantasies are being destroyed.
Whether you should try it or not is usually answered by "Yes do it" because otherwise... you're just doing nothing. "Another girl" isn't the other option, it's not even related. You don't have to somehow close all doors while there is nothing going on.
However I would question myself if I were pursuing a girl for whom none of her universe seems interesting to me. If you're really interested maybe there are stuff she does that do interest you and which you'd like to be a part of or try at least.
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On March 03 2014 11:11 autoexec wrote:
Ok so I have a bit of a problem in front of me. I am not giving it a whole bunch of my thoughts and am happy with myself for not stressing out over it like I probably normally would. I have more important things at this point in my life, but I am figuring it wouldn't hurt to try a little bit in the situation. So here it is:
There is this girl at my high school who is a Junior. (I am a Sophomore) I have a few classes with her and she seems like a genuinely nice person who has a great personality. I like to be around her and have thought before to myself that I wouldn't mind being more than friends. She seems to be a bit of a party person and hangs out with people who I don't at school. They seem like the group that would be "too cool" to hang out with me although I am no chump myself, but I am simply an underclassman. I am not part of any partying scene. I find other things to do as I don't drink, smoke, or have sex (or kissed a girl for that matter), even though I am perfectly fine with those things, I just don't prioritize them. All in all I just don't feel like I would fit in with her group, although I feel like I would fit in great with her. Should I even try to pursue it, or should I just wait for another girl to come along and not emotionally invest myself with her and hurt myself in the long run if it doesn't work out?
Edit: Just to make it clear, I'm not bashing at all on how people live.
Rezoacken is correct. The unhappy way LOTS of people operate in high school is to get a crush, not do anything except long from afar, get emotionally invested before anything's happened, and then be unable to act normally around that person or approach even, and have almost no hope for anything happening while at the same time getting crushed when it doesn't.
We can't answer your question, the only way to get the answer to your question is to try and see whether you work together or not, which is also how you AVOID getting too emotionally invested in a lost cause, cause if it doesn't, well you have your answer, you can move on.
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When Mr K loved a person
"What do you do," Mr K was asked, "when you love a person?" "I make a sketch," said Mr K, "and look to it that a good likeness results." "Of the person?" "No," said Mr K, "to the sketch."
-B. Brecht.
...that's exactly what you're doing when you're building up a crush before anything even happened. You're building a crush towards an image that's nowhere but in your head.
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On March 03 2014 15:22 r.Evo wrote:Show nested quote +When Mr K loved a person
"What do you do," Mr K was asked, "when you love a person?" "I make a sketch," said Mr K, "and look to it that a good likeness results." "Of the person?" "No," said Mr K, "to the sketch."
-B. Brecht. ...that's exactly what you're doing when you're building up a crush before anything even happened. You're building a crush towards an image that's nowhere but in your head.
That quote works wonders in this thread then:
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=444721
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4 dates lined up with 4 different girls this weekend, first one is today. Let's see how it goes 
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People have a hard time realising when I'm taking the piss. I actually took a girl out once. Her dad asked me when I was going to bring her back and I told him it depends on how quickly I can get her pregnant. I thought I was being funny. He did not think so.
On March 03 2014 09:47 apolloismyjimmy wrote:How do I seduce Apollo?
Girl he is sooo skinny. Get yourself a real man (or a reasonable facsimile there of.)
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I fail to see the hilarity as well.
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That sounds like one of the jokes my brother would tell. Not in a good way.
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I went into a maniac laugh, but more because I could see the fathers' face. Tact can go a long way man...
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What can I say I love me some bad jokes. Just to be fair I was 13 when I did that. I must say not having the ever present fear of a dad walking in on you is one of the better things of being an adult.
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Ok, so I was in a club and saw this cute blonde girl. Apparently she is a friend of my friend who was also there, we had lots of eye contact and while I was near the bar she approached me. I got us drinks, we had a good chat then we spend good 2+ hours dancing and kissing. Then it comes to that phase where I start asking where she is living and stuff so I can take her home. She said she just got out of a relationship and doesn't want anything to happen tonight. So I'm like ah well, you prolly not gona remember me tomorrow anyway so I guess it's ok to at least be fair and say that you didn't found me sexually attractive and shit. She immediately kissed me saying ofc she will be remembering me ( I have to say none of us were that drunk), she insists on the break-up thing being real and says she'll be ok in a couple of week time. Fair play, we exchange numbers, kiss few more times and its goodbye time.
That was the entire thing, few days after she adds me on facebook. She is fit and I'm kinda mad that I couldn't bang her. So I know ppl you meet in clubs don't mean much, that's what I told to myself for past 3 weeks and moved on. Now I feel kinda lonely and debating calling her, we kissed and touched each other for half of the night afterall so there should be some tension.
So anyway, I wanna call her but dunno what to say really. Any advise on how to approach this?
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On March 07 2014 11:51 Skynx wrote:
Ok, so I was in a club and saw this cute blonde girl. Apparently she is a friend of my friend who was also there, we had lots of eye contact and while I was near the bar she approached me. I got us drinks, we had a good chat then we spend good 2+ hours dancing and kissing. Then it comes to that phase where I start asking where she is living and stuff so I can take her home. She said she just got out of a relationship and doesn't want anything to happen tonight. So I'm like ah well, you prolly not gona remember me tomorrow anyway so I guess it's ok to at least be fair and say that you didn't found me sexually attractive and shit. She immediately kissed me saying ofc she will be remembering me ( I have to say none of us were that drunk), she insists on the break-up thing being real and says she'll be ok in a couple of week time. Fair play, we exchange numbers, kiss few more times and its goodbye time.
That was the entire thing, few days after she adds me on facebook. She is fit and I'm kinda mad that I couldn't bang her. So I know ppl you meet in clubs don't mean much, that's what I told to myself for past 3 weeks and moved on. Now I feel kinda lonely and debating calling her, we kissed and touched each other for half of the night afterall so there should be some tension.
So anyway, I wanna call her but dunno what to say really. Any advise on how to approach this?
She said she'd be fine in a couple weeks. It's been a couple weeks. Give her a call and see if she wants to go out.
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Honestly, I don't understand women sometimes. Don't text me for like a month then suddenly you're sending me like 3 paragraph long messages? -_-
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Was going to post in the blowing off steam thread or whatever but i saw this first. Most likely won't reply to any responses, just need to get it off my chest so i can calm down and stop recalling the convo's in my head.
This chick who is digging me, asked me to get her an internship at my family business so i can train her. So I did, and now my dad and bosses keep calling me a horndog cuz shes hot. Fuckers are worried about sexual harassment lawsuits too. I was trying to be nice for one, and two she is the one coming on to me. *sigh*. Whatever I feel better now. Thanks internet.
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single and luvin every minute of it haha. women are annoying as hell.
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EPT
