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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
Firebolt145
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Lalalaland34510 Posts
February 28 2014 13:23 GMT
#8461
On February 28 2014 19:24 terranallin wrote:
Since a lot of the TL'ers have an interest for asian women and that TL advertises them, how about lets read a blog concerning the type of son you will get from a white dad and asian mum:

http://stuffseurasianslike.wordpress.com/2013/07/14/9/

Not written by me just passing it along.
+ Show Spoiler +
Disturbing indeed

I don't even know how to react to this, being half white/half Asian myself.
Moderator
Mensol
Profile Joined September 2012
14536 Posts
February 28 2014 15:51 GMT
#8462
hey hey! There is a girl in my classroom and i feel like she has interest in me.

She's always saying hi to me (yeah just me) even thought we arent close friends. I was sick two days ago and she said "you look bad, what happened?"

and today when i was going to home all alone (i choosed different way to go home this time) she said "i thought you werent going from this way" then joined me we walked together around 10 mins i think? We talked about classic things like school etc.

What do you guys think? :< i also like her but im still not totally sure if she likes me :<
If you don't know what the fuck you are doing, how are your enemies supposed to know what the fuck you are doing. - imaqtpie on NA teams at Worlds.
Acrofales
Profile Joined August 2010
Spain18488 Posts
February 28 2014 16:05 GMT
#8463
On March 01 2014 00:51 Mensol wrote:
hey hey! There is a girl in my classroom and i feel like she has interest in me.

She's always saying hi to me (yeah just me) even thought we arent close friends. I was sick two days ago and she said "you look bad, what happened?"

and today when i was going to home all alone (i choosed different way to go home this time) she said "i thought you werent going from this way" then joined me we walked together around 10 mins i think? We talked about classic things like school etc.

What do you guys think? :< i also like her but im still not totally sure if she likes me :<

I don't know why you're asking us, but if you really want, I can confer with my magic 8-ball to give you an answer.

Talk to HER! Invite her to go and have an icecream, play in the arcade or whatever people of your age do nowadays!
Merany
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
France890 Posts
February 28 2014 17:10 GMT
#8464
Had a date with a girl I met through online dating last Tuesday.
She is like the woman I've always dreamed of meeting. Super cute (easily 8 or 9). Likes metal. Likes good beer. Said she just started a new playthrough of Baldur's Gate (seriously, how awesome is that when a girl says in an email that "My hotel's as clean as an Elven arse!" cracks her up every single time without me ever mentioning the game beforehand?).
And now, I put a huge pressure on myself because I really, really don't want to mess that one up.
Date went fairly well, we went to a British pub in my city and pretty much talked non stop for 4 hours.
Not much flirting, but lots of laugh and lots of eye contact.

Sent her a message the day after basically saying "hey, was awesome meeting you, would love to see you again". She replied something like "sure, will get back to you. And there's this bar I know I want to show you".
Now, that's not the kind of romantic second date I would have hoped for... I know the bar she's speaking of though cause I remember mentioning I had never been there during the evening and it's more a "quality / rare beer tasting" kinda thing than a regular pub so I guess it's fine?
Anyway, what I fear the most now is the dreaded "friendzone" I've been reading this thread for quite some time so I know I need to bring in that "escalation" thing you guys keep talking about While staying cool and natural. Tough task. Now, just have to hope I have what it takes and that she enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed hers!
WombaT
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Northern Ireland27478 Posts
February 28 2014 17:13 GMT
#8465
That sounds like it's progressing well naturally, don't overthink it man. That she has a second date venue in mind is a good sign for one, and it sounds like the convo flowed pretty well first time round (y)
'You'll always be the cuddly marsupial of my heart, despite the inherent flaws of your ancestry' - Squat
TL+ Member
Mensol
Profile Joined September 2012
14536 Posts
February 28 2014 17:14 GMT
#8466
On March 01 2014 01:05 Acrofales wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 01 2014 00:51 Mensol wrote:
hey hey! There is a girl in my classroom and i feel like she has interest in me.

She's always saying hi to me (yeah just me) even thought we arent close friends. I was sick two days ago and she said "you look bad, what happened?"

and today when i was going to home all alone (i choosed different way to go home this time) she said "i thought you werent going from this way" then joined me we walked together around 10 mins i think? We talked about classic things like school etc.

What do you guys think? :< i also like her but im still not totally sure if she likes me :<

I don't know why you're asking us, but if you really want, I can confer with my magic 8-ball to give you an answer.

Talk to HER! Invite her to go and have an icecream, play in the arcade or whatever people of your age do nowadays!

I want to talk with her but i need to take her phone number first :3 Today i havent had enough courage to do it.

I also want to mention that she's going to be my first date(im 21 yo).
If you don't know what the fuck you are doing, how are your enemies supposed to know what the fuck you are doing. - imaqtpie on NA teams at Worlds.
rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
February 28 2014 17:51 GMT
#8467
On February 28 2014 22:23 Firebolt145 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 28 2014 19:24 terranallin wrote:
Since a lot of the TL'ers have an interest for asian women and that TL advertises them, how about lets read a blog concerning the type of son you will get from a white dad and asian mum:

http://stuffseurasianslike.wordpress.com/2013/07/14/9/

Not written by me just passing it along.
+ Show Spoiler +
Disturbing indeed

I don't even know how to react to this, being half white/half Asian myself.


There's no reaction to have toward intellectual disability apart providing help or being sad.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-02-28 18:05:11
February 28 2014 18:04 GMT
#8468
On March 01 2014 02:10 Merany wrote:
Had a date with a girl I met through online dating last Tuesday.
She is like the woman I've always dreamed of meeting. Super cute (easily 8 or 9). Likes metal. Likes good beer. Said she just started a new playthrough of Baldur's Gate (seriously, how awesome is that when a girl says in an email that "My hotel's as clean as an Elven arse!" cracks her up every single time without me ever mentioning the game beforehand?).
And now, I put a huge pressure on myself because I really, really don't want to mess that one up.
Date went fairly well, we went to a British pub in my city and pretty much talked non stop for 4 hours.
Not much flirting, but lots of laugh and lots of eye contact.

Sent her a message the day after basically saying "hey, was awesome meeting you, would love to see you again". She replied something like "sure, will get back to you. And there's this bar I know I want to show you".
Now, that's not the kind of romantic second date I would have hoped for... I know the bar she's speaking of though cause I remember mentioning I had never been there during the evening and it's more a "quality / rare beer tasting" kinda thing than a regular pub so I guess it's fine?
Anyway, what I fear the most now is the dreaded "friendzone" I've been reading this thread for quite some time so I know I need to bring in that "escalation" thing you guys keep talking about While staying cool and natural. Tough task. Now, just have to hope I have what it takes and that she enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed hers!


All of this is going alright so far I wouldn't stress too much about what had happened.

However you must take conscience that if she doesn't do the first step you have to do it. Otherwise you risk for things to simply dwindle down and eventually be stuck into a friendship mentality with you frustrated in it. And then at that point it's like being at the bottom of the valley, climbing back up is way harder than before (not impossible admittedly).
I know it's scary as fuck believe me. You fear of losing, her, of looking like a fool, etc. etc. But the thing is you have to take risks in love, it's not a safe bet game.

Keep joking, try to be involved in physical escalation (try physical activities or games to help you, sit next to her if you have the opportunity instead of face to face). Suggest your intent by giving a few compliments. Etc. But so far so good, just do not let the window of opportunity close. Bars are fine but try some variation too.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
fishjie
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States1519 Posts
February 28 2014 19:19 GMT
#8469
On February 28 2014 18:23 Kleinmuuhg wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 28 2014 10:14 fishjie wrote:
On February 28 2014 08:48 farvacola wrote:
On February 28 2014 07:47 fishjie wrote:
On February 28 2014 04:41 Snotling wrote:
On February 28 2014 04:17 fishjie wrote:
bro code exists for a reason.


you realise that the bro code doesn't actually exist?


that's a pretty meaningless statement. you might as well say no codes of conduct "exist". whatever i'm not here to argue pointless semantics like that. bottom line is, don't have sex with your friend's ex. unless you like drama and being shunned and losing your friends.

The bottom line is, fishjie's friends are the only kinds of friends that exist, and nobody has ever felt differently about an ex, ever. It is known.


These are basic common sense things such as don't date a coworker who works on the same team as you. you can ignore them and suffer the consequences while everyone else enjoys the lulz, or you can make good life choices

Shit i have to gtell my married colleagues that is was a Bad idea and they need to Split asap


Shit I have to laugh at all my coworkers who did date someone at the workplace and when it ended, how horribly it impacted their careers because of all the drama. I really shouldn't have to explain why dating a coworker that you work with on the same team is a terrible idea. Its basically as dumb as dating your best friend's ex gf. If you're dating someone who works at the same company, that's OK, as long as the company is large enough and they are on a different floor, or better yet a different building on campus.

If you don't wanna live life by common sense principles, sure you might get lucky. Just like having unprotected sex feels great and you might never get an STD or get a girl pregnant. But high risk low reward scenarios are plain dumb to me.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32164 Posts
February 28 2014 22:27 GMT
#8470
if you dont mind ignoring the billions of drama-free options you could stick your dick into, boinking an immediate coworker or your buddy's recent ex isnt a bad idea!
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
NewSunshine
Profile Joined July 2011
United States5938 Posts
February 28 2014 23:02 GMT
#8471
On March 01 2014 07:27 QuanticHawk wrote:
if you dont mind ignoring the billions of drama-free options you could stick your dick into, boinking an immediate coworker or your buddy's recent ex isnt a bad idea!

Welcome back fine sir
"If you find yourself feeling lost, take pride in the accuracy of your feelings." - Night Vale
WarSame
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada1950 Posts
February 28 2014 23:29 GMT
#8472
On March 01 2014 08:02 NewSunshine wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 01 2014 07:27 QuanticHawk wrote:
if you dont mind ignoring the billions of drama-free options you could stick your dick into, boinking an immediate coworker or your buddy's recent ex isnt a bad idea!

Welcome back fine sir

/tips fedora
Can it be I stayed away too long? Did you miss these rhymes while I was gone?
fishjie
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States1519 Posts
March 01 2014 00:21 GMT
#8473
On March 01 2014 02:10 Merany wrote:
Had a date with a girl I met through online dating last Tuesday.
She is like the woman I've always dreamed of meeting. Super cute (easily 8 or 9). Likes metal. Likes good beer. Said she just started a new playthrough of Baldur's Gate (seriously, how awesome is that when a girl says in an email that "My hotel's as clean as an Elven arse!" cracks her up every single time without me ever mentioning the game beforehand?).
And now, I put a huge pressure on myself because I really, really don't want to mess that one up.
Date went fairly well, we went to a British pub in my city and pretty much talked non stop for 4 hours.
Not much flirting, but lots of laugh and lots of eye contact.

Sent her a message the day after basically saying "hey, was awesome meeting you, would love to see you again". She replied something like "sure, will get back to you. And there's this bar I know I want to show you".
Now, that's not the kind of romantic second date I would have hoped for... I know the bar she's speaking of though cause I remember mentioning I had never been there during the evening and it's more a "quality / rare beer tasting" kinda thing than a regular pub so I guess it's fine?
Anyway, what I fear the most now is the dreaded "friendzone" I've been reading this thread for quite some time so I know I need to bring in that "escalation" thing you guys keep talking about While staying cool and natural. Tough task. Now, just have to hope I have what it takes and that she enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed hers!


easier said than done but you should relax. just have fun. you're putting huge pressure on yourself because in your head, you've already built her up to be "the one". to get around this, you should be going out on dates with multiple girls, then you won't take anything so seriously. ironically, by taking things so seriously in the beginning, you're crippling your chances of getting serious later on down the road.

as for friendzone, just try to kiss her at the end of the date when you drop her off. the kiss will tell you everything you need to know. kiss even if you think she's not into you. i've made out with girls who i thought were bored because they were so quiet, but in hindsight it was because they were nervous and actually liked me. And i've gotten shot down by girls who i thought we were having a good time together, but turns out they saw me as a fun guy who would make a good friend. so, if she kisses you back, boom you're in. if she gives you the cheek, then thank her for a good time and date other women, wait for her to call you again. if she pushes you away, then lulz, politely apologize and never talk to her again.
Grumbels
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Netherlands7032 Posts
March 01 2014 00:29 GMT
#8474
me: "so I have pet rats", her response: "I'm never visiting your apartment ever"

sick opening line
Well, now I tell you, I never seen good come o' goodness yet. Him as strikes first is my fancy; dead men don't bite; them's my views--amen, so be it.
phosphorylation
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States2935 Posts
March 01 2014 02:00 GMT
#8475
On February 28 2014 19:24 terranallin wrote:
Since a lot of the TL'ers have an interest for asian women and that TL advertises them, how about lets read a blog concerning the type of son you will get from a white dad and asian mum:

http://stuffseurasianslike.wordpress.com/2013/07/14/9/

Not written by me just passing it along.
+ Show Spoiler +
Disturbing indeed

While clearly overdramatic and exaggerated, I do think there is some rarely-addressed reality underneath all the vitriol -- particularly regarding the feelings of emasculation and self-hatred that WM/AF male offspring might have to cope with.
Buy prints of my photographs at Redbubble -> http://www.redbubble.com/people/shoenberg3
aTnClouD
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Italy2428 Posts
March 01 2014 03:19 GMT
#8476
What's wrong with being asian or half asian? Ok, your looks are less attractive to women, as much as many unattractive and small white people are. You could still do like they do and overcome it with character, hard work and knowledge and more importantly nobody should ever feel they are worth what people think of them when they first meet them. Imo that blog was just very shallow.
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g64/hunter692007/kruemelmonsteryn0.gif
phosphorylation
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States2935 Posts
March 01 2014 04:41 GMT
#8477
sure, but you still have a good reason to rant about the injustice and struggles with self-identity
Buy prints of my photographs at Redbubble -> http://www.redbubble.com/people/shoenberg3
chadissilent
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Canada1187 Posts
March 01 2014 04:55 GMT
#8478
On March 01 2014 12:19 aTnClouD wrote:
What's wrong with being asian or half asian? Ok, your looks are less attractive to women, as much as many unattractive and small white people are. You could still do like they do and overcome it with character, hard work and knowledge and more importantly nobody should ever feel they are worth what people think of them when they first meet them. Imo that blog was just very shallow.

I have a half-asian friend who is absolutely gorgeous, but both of her parents are also good looking. Maybe the "problem" people are finding with half-asian offspring from WM/AF is that the couples aren't always shining examples of fantastic genetics to start with. Go take a look at the "pictures of your S/O" thread to see some examples. I'm not saying this as a widespread generalization, just what I've noticed in social circles.

As a side note, I just got that Tinder app based on the recommendations of some friends and that thing is fantastic. I've received a ton of attention and have some dates lined up this weekend with some pretty damn cute girls.
Calanthe
Profile Joined October 2012
United States148 Posts
March 01 2014 05:25 GMT
#8479
On March 01 2014 09:29 Grumbels wrote:
me: "so I have pet rats", her response: "I'm never visiting your apartment ever"

sick opening line


3/10. you coulda been this guy if you'd tried a little harder.
my heart's the bitter buffalo
dravernor
Profile Blog Joined May 2013
Netherlands6192 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-03-01 06:02:30
March 01 2014 05:47 GMT
#8480
I had a pet rat ^_^ They make such great little pets, really. If more people knew about them they wouldnt be so off-put.

Edit: Woah that was creepy.
<3
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