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InfernoStarcraft
Australia136 Posts
If your not bothered by being a virgin then where your at is perfectly fine, if it bothers you then you can always do something about it  But IMO people who chase sex and sex alone are generally pretty shallow. Knuckle-draggers gonna hate but what can you do? | ||
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InTheCloudss
Netherlands14 Posts
On August 31 2011 17:05 TerlocSG wrote: I think the point of this thread might have fallen between the cracks of some of the discussion taking place here. The word I focus on the most in the title is "Society." We all know sex is fun (porn) and its important (reproduction), but the idea about looking at it in a social context brings up a different issue. I guess how I read the question is: Is sex too important in today's society? Important might be a bad word but I have a horrible vocabulary and if I think of the right word I'll change it. What I think about with this question is more along the lines of how young adults are acting towards sex. I choose young adults for 2 reasons: 1. I'm one of them, I'm 19, and 2. They're the "next" generation as I see it (I kind of see the world as children [0-17], young adults [18~25], older adults [25~65], and seniors [65+]), so soon the young adults will be the main force in the workforce, voting more, and generally running the world. That might be a gross oversimplification of how the world works, but its how I've recently started seeing the world. Anyway, the way I've noticed young adults treating sex as of late is scary to me. It seems like sex dominates people's minds in college (again, using college because I'm in college). I don't know how college was 30 years ago, and I don't know how it will be 30 years from now, but right now sex seems to be in everyone's top 3 priorities in college. I'm not saying this should change, but maybe the balance should shift a little (OP reference? eh, eh?). It seems like to the majority of students it goes: 1. Party, 2. Sex, 3. School, where 1 and 2 are interchangeable depending on what the person prefers. This isn't a bad list, I guess mine is similar, but the order and %'s involved frighten me. Of course I'm speculating here and I have no proof, but it seems like its a 40/40/20 split for these options. Now this leads me back to my original idea of what the thread is asking. I say a 40/40/20 split with school taking the 20 is horrible for society. I would prefer to see something more to a 70/15/15 split with school in the number one spot. I think sex, and partying/drinking/drugs, are extremely OP in society. Sex and partying has become the main goal for most students.* This could be a problem, but since I cannot compare this to my experience with college 30 years ago, for obvious reasons, I have no idea how this will effect the world once my generation becomes the most powerful generation. * = This is what I observe at my university (University of Arizona). Again, its just what it feels like to me. All my numbers are made up, none of my points can be proven, but I'm willing to argue any of them, or explain in more detail if need be. some1 should make a can we save society thread ... or a is the next generation dumber then the previous generation thread >.> but i agree whit you here and that is mostly the problem nowadays the masses are becoming more stupid and unrealistic every day, nowadays you get frowned upon for wanting to become a scientist or even things as basic as liking math, it all starts in the lower educations and i belive its mostly because you have to be "cool" even if you dont want to you have to go whit the masses or you get frowned upon, i agree sex is important but help humanity and aftwards when you come home go have sex. | ||
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Gigaudas
Sweden1213 Posts
You are not a loser but you are the victim of ideals that have existed since the stone age. Controlling sex is an evolutionary advantage that allow groups to cooperate rather than fight for the right to mate. I think sexual taboos should be discussed scientifically in schools because iy might help fight thebculture OP describes where having sex is status. | ||
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UnknownReclaimer
United States146 Posts
That being said, it can be way to OP lol. People can put WAY too much emphasis on it. A ton can be said about the subject, but to put it simply, if you are of legal age and want to have sex feel free to do so. If you don't, no matter the reason, don't. Their is no shame in either. | ||
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Polis
Poland1292 Posts
I am asexual, that is maybe the smallest sexual minority, but I didn't see anything about it in this thread. Also asexuality exist in other animals as well: http://jas.fass.org/content/84/6/1520.abstract http://www.biolreprod.org/content/67/1/263.full Not all asexuals are virgins some do it because of the social pressure, some have sex because they are in relationship with a sexual, but I am to assertive for first, and to aromantic for the second. On July 22 2011 11:41 UniversalSnip wrote: Can't knock it till you try it. You know... so to speak. Had you tried a dick up your buttocks? I am just interested if people who say that actually follow it. | ||
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Cel.erity
United States4890 Posts
1. Never been in a serious relationship. 2. Not desirable or sociable enough to hook up with friends/random girls. Of course, there's always the religious fanatic/asexual option, but we're not really talking about that considering the tone of the OP. When someone tells me they're a virgin, my opinion of them as a person doesn't exactly change, but in basically all cases it's because they are antisocial or in some way strange. I have plenty of antisocial/strange friends. However, wanting sex is the most natural thing for human beings, so the only two options for a 20-year old virgin are that they don't want it (strange) or they can't get it (not strange, but unfortunate). I think the OP's point is that most people assume virgins are all in the second category, and that is true, because most people can't imagine someone who doesn't care about sex. Therefore they assume you really want sex like they do, and call you a loser for not being able to get it. There is some merit to this point of view, since getting laid is pretty much the easiest thing in the world if you have any social skills. Note, I don't think you need to troll clubs and sleep with 10 women a week to be cool, but having one or two committed relationships would also make you a non-virgin, and even more cool. | ||
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Sharkyloft
Colombia69 Posts
About sex and relationships. Although its true that what connects two people in a couple is more than just bodies rubbing against each other, sex is one of the legs that hold the relationship steady. Without sex i cant see a relationship working. Only sex is not enough on its own. Sex is one of the most beautiful things in life, like love, passion, work and starcraft  , and if you feel bad about not having it, try and get yourself laid. If youre ok with not having it, thats fine too.One last thing. Be true to yourself. If the reason you dont want to have sex is because it is not in your interests, then its fine. But if the real reason is that you're frightened to approach a girl you like, and you're telling yourself its because you dont want it, then there is a problem, not in regards to the value or not of the sexual act, but in the fact that you are lying to yourself. Tennant and Lowe say it better... Love Comes Quickly | ||
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Probasaur
United States461 Posts
On August 31 2011 17:34 InfernoStarcraft wrote: I'd say sex is entirely over rated. I'm 19 and I've been with my girlfriend for over 3 years, I'd say of all the experience that we've had together sex is the least significant or meaningful. If your not bothered by being a virgin then where your at is perfectly fine, if it bothers you then you can always do something about it But IMO people who chase sex and sex alone are generally pretty shallow. Knuckle-draggers gonna hate but what can you do? Yeah this guy makes a strong point. I've rushed into the bed with just about every girl I've cared for, and I wish I hadn't with every one. I wish I was still a virgin just so that when someone comes along that I wanna be with I could feel closer to her than any of the other chicks in my life. But yea society puts way too much stock in sex. USA definitely does. Land of the free right? Except the way they control you is by making you feel guilty about your inner most human desires. So you suppress them until it boils over and you become a sex addict and you think thats all there is to life. If they just let us find out on our own whats bad for us and whats good we wouldn't have all these stigmas implanted in us and there would be so many less drug addicts and shallow people who don't know how to get close to each other. | ||
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lyrlian
Netherlands257 Posts
On August 31 2011 17:21 positron. wrote: I wish that 40/40/20 spit were true. The guys who place sex and party ahead of school are dumb. We all should be thankful that they are that dumb. There will be way less competition later on. "In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women." How do you make money without resorting to the way of Tony Montana? Be good at school. You don't actually believe this, do you? Sounds like you're saying that going to a party and/or having sex makes you a bad student. | ||
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lyrlian
Netherlands257 Posts
On August 31 2011 18:50 Cel.erity wrote: In my opinion, being a virgin at 20 means two things: 1. Never been in a serious relationship. 2. Not desirable or sociable enough to hook up with friends/random girls. Of course, there's always the religious fanatic/asexual option, but we're not really talking about that considering the tone of the OP. When someone tells me they're a virgin, my opinion of them as a person doesn't exactly change, but in basically all cases it's because they are antisocial or in some way strange. I have plenty of antisocial/strange friends. However, wanting sex is the most natural thing for human beings, so the only two options for a 20-year old virgin are that they don't want it (strange) or they can't get it (not strange, but unfortunate). I think the OP's point is that most people assume virgins are all in the second category, and that is true, because most people can't imagine someone who doesn't care about sex. Therefore they assume you really want sex like they do, and call you a loser for not being able to get it. There is some merit to this point of view, since getting laid is pretty much the easiest thing in the world if you have any social skills. Note, I don't think you need to troll clubs and sleep with 10 women a week to be cool, but having one or two committed relationships would also make you a non-virgin, and even more cool. Most true post in this thread, exactly wording my thoughts on the subject! | ||
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elimzkE
Australia92 Posts
Anyway, I'm a virgin myself and I'm too confident of a person to care what anybody thinks about my sexual status. Obviously it doesn't help my stereotype as I'm a programmer and competitive gamer, but when it comes down to it I'm a perfectly happy person with some great friends and a supportive family. Sex isn't a part of my happiness, and although it could be, it doesn't make me any less of a person. | ||
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BordZ
Australia118 Posts
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Samuel Neptune
United States95 Posts
if you're asking whether it's a valid way to measure one's value: depends on what kind of social circles you're in it's pretty simple | ||
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pyrogenetix
China5098 Posts
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couches
618 Posts
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DisneylandSC
Netherlands435 Posts
On August 31 2011 19:41 lyrlian wrote: Most true post in this thread, exactly wording my thoughts on the subject! No it's not. It's full of unsubstantiated claims and assertions and riddled with logical fallacies. Just saying... | ||
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Akhee
Brazil811 Posts
On August 31 2011 19:39 lyrlian wrote: You don't actually believe this, do you? Sounds like you're saying that going to a party and/or having sex makes you a bad student. this guy want power to get women haha~ t_t | ||
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DisneylandSC
Netherlands435 Posts
This guy think he funny haha~ t_t | ||
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Xiphos
Canada7507 Posts
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blAke139
Switzerland199 Posts
I'm sorry, but it's just one of the greatest things that exist. Not only because it's needed to create new human life, but because it's just a shitload of fun. It's in our instincts to "want sex". If you don't want it, that means your instincts are broken (that's a joke, actually) because of society. We are meant to have sex, we were "designed" to reproduce (that's serious though). But ALL of that does not mean that you're weird if you don't want sex yet. Even if it's sounds like it. Society made sex to something fun and cool (which it both is), if you don't want it just for that, that's totally fine. You don't even have to like it. But at some point in life, every single one of us will start desiring sex. Not because we wanna be cool too, just because our instincts tell us. All of that also applies to women, actually. Fortunately, we don't need a club (you know, cudgel, mace, whatever) anymore to force women into having sex. Ironically, we can go to clubs to make it easier though. | ||
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