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On October 11 2011 07:31 Temporarykid wrote:
And worst comes to worst, I suggest you try something like weed (I do, I'm in no way addicted, and it helps tremendously.) You shouldn't rely on it by no means, but it will definitely make things easier to bear when times get too rough.
You think he has depression and your suggestion is drug use!
I dont know man that just sounds like an awful idea to me.
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On October 11 2011 07:10 Steelavocado wrote:I am 16 and a junior in High School.
okay, this i dunno. its high school. Bah. i feel ive been in a similar situation with home life/ parents divorce/ all that jazz. I was 9? when it happened and we were poor as hell, single mom family with 2 kids. Your all depressed since then? Tho it did take me a few years.
Really, im pretty much against pills and shit for this type of thing. I had a friend get depressed like this for awhile, parents took her in and she has been taking 4 pills a day since, and has only gotten worse, lazy, its intense. I am no longer friends with her, she got insane, and it wasn't from the depression anymore, not to mention she had everything handed to her with no responsibility to begin with. I dont suggest just going and getting drugged up from a shrink, they just want your money.
Depression at that age is pretty common and really once you grow up a little and get into more adult situations, you will realize the past happened for a reason and in the end you wasted all that time being unhappy for nothing. I know i felt that way.
At the end of the day, life sucks, but if you let things bring you down it will do alot more than suck and thats what happening. I know you love your parents and all but realize its their personal life and instead of getting all sad over it look ahead, be close to your family, and if one of them brings home someone who is just god awful, tell them like you would any close friend.
Also, i guess i am different than most ppl with this, but when i feel like things are getting rough, i just take a reality check instead of just being sad about it. Life isnt as hard as most people make it out to be, and then you make low stress things consume you. There are prolly ppl worse off than you in the town over. Hell you can afford internet.
Just think about everything that is heavy on your mind, then see if there is anything in your power to do about it. If there is, great, go do it. If not well... why bother stressing and getting depressed over something you have little to no control over? Its pointless, and only brings yourself down for absolutely no reason.
I just know i was a messed up little kid during the early high school years, and looking on it now 4 or 5 years later, i realize it was in the end, for nothing. But ill say this, once you move out of your parents house, the stress about what they do lifted immensely. Not sure how much any of this will help since you already have your mind on how depressed you are, but just realize the stress that is happening in your life isn't as hard as you are making it in your head. It usually never is.
And if your just someone who acts depressed because you enjoy the attention, well, are you? you might not even realize it.
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On October 11 2011 07:25 Steelavocado wrote:Show nested quote +On October 11 2011 07:21 Zorkmid wrote:
Chin up buddy, call kids help phone, start eating properly and get out there and check stuff out!
The world is a fucking amazing place. Just open your eyes! I wish it was that easy. When you are in a situation like I am, you cant just fix everything. I tried therapy once. It was probably the biggest waste of my time. I am not ungrateful for your advice or the "help" from the phyciatrist, it just isn't helping. You would think if I could eat properly I would, but I can't. I feel hopeless...
Why can't you eat properly? The way your post of worded make it sounds like your only allowed to eat once per day.
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Just please....don't take any medication. I wouldn't even smoke weed if you are the introverted type. Your thoughts on depression will only intensify.
Just work on yourself. Improve on the things you can change and don't like in your life. Happiness is a state of mind. It's a choice to be happy, not an accolade.
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I recommend seeing a psychiatrist. I share your same problem almost down to every detail and I fixed it by taking stimulants. They make me feel alive and happy. Psychologists don't prescribe stuff so make sure it's a psychiatrist.
Edit: Fuck SSRIs though, if he tries to give you that then say no
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Think of one nice thing that you could do for someone and do it each day this week. Next week, think of two nice things that you could do for two different people each day and do those. Continue.
Depression is terrible because it focuses us in on our selves and makes it impossible to change. It sounds like you've had a rough time recently and I'm really sorry to hear that. But I strongly recommend finding someone to talk to and then focusing as much as you can on things outside yourself. I know it sounds strange, but doing nice things for other people will make you happier then doing nice things for yourself will.
Feel free to pm me 
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Hey Steelavocado, just want to say that a good deal of the stuff in that Cracked article is quite true. I'm 27 now and I can tell you that it does get better. I think one of the most important things to take away from that article and much of the advice given to you is that what you are feeling is very very NORMAL.
I want to preface my post with some background:
I was a nerdy, quiet, passive aggressive, withdrawn person in high school to most people. I saw counselors before and while I talked through some stuff it ultimately didn't change too much for me. I was called into the principal's office because rumors were going around that I had a hit list and was going to snap and show up to school with guns or something.
Whenever I hear someone talk about being depressed at that age it makes me remember my high school self. I'm hoping some of my advice from a kindred spirit can help you.
While there are tons of people that you see in your daily life at your age that seem to be totally happy with life with everything under control I think you would be surprised how many people feel the exact same way you do. You just can't see it. Being a little over a decade older than you (wow I feel old now) I can tell you from experience that most of my friends had the same feelings of helplessness, sadness, loneliness, and just general frustration with life. I always thought that I was a weirdo that did "stupid" things like cry at my computer, sometimes without really knowing why. Sure, not everyone does that specifically but lots of people, feel the same thing I did then and you are now but expressed it differently. Everyone has embarrassing stories about how their emotions tore them apart when they were your age.
If it's any consolation, high school is literally the toughest time emotionally for most people barring extraneous factors. I know you feel like you are 100% in control of your mental faculties but your body is cranking hormones like there is no tomorrow that make every thing feel worse than you will remember it years from now. Again, it may seem like an eternity now before you go to college in two years but I can almost guarantee you will feel much much better when you do. Make sure you dorm and get out of the house and on your own. I can't speak for everyone but I know that for me going to college was like a psychological rebirth. Things felt different, it was a fresh start, new people, a new place, everything just felt right and better.
Like I said at the top of my post, I had a lot of issues when I was in high school. I never went out with friends, I stayed at home and played video games, feeling depressed. When I got to college I made friends, starting going out to events, started talking to people and generally feeling comfortable in my own skin for the first time since I entered middle school. Two years into college I met my girlfriend that I have been with ever since. The high school me never ever in a million years would have been able to pull that off. And I didn't even go ask her out either, there was such a drastic change in my personality, confidence, and everything in general that she approached me. High school me never would have had a chance, I couldn't even make eye contact with a girl and not feel the blood rush to my face. I was very different though.
Sorry to be so long winded, I hope some of this post connects with you and is helpful. I really do. I wish I could go back in time and tell my high school self this advice. Telling you is probably the next best thing. Good luck, and remember that things will get better and what you are going through right now is normal. You will get through it and you will be happy when you do.
Feel free to PM me if you want someone to talk to.
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he's 16.. and as far as i know its puberty, and hes in school, thats normal to feel a bit down,we all have been there/are there. its just a phase in life. it will pass.
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I don't feel that I know you enough to give you detailed advice or that I am the best person to do so even if I did, but what I feel is certainly true is that time will make things better. I could see my Sophomore year self writing something similar to what you wrote, and honestly I look back on that time thinking that I was always upset over nothing.
And people are right about just doing things. It doesn't have to be a great passion, but hell, try playing an instrument, or writing lyrics, or working out, or biking/skating/running, or getting a new game, or watching sports, or reading, or hell, just start watching a bunch of new shows to find something to occupy yourself. It helps.
And realize that people are out there who want you to be happy. I know that may sound silly, but realize that in less than an hour, 2 dozen people on a website for a computer game wanted to respond because they were genuinely concerned about you. There are good people out there.
Also, your tag is "Hello! Hope you have a great day!" You are a fucking baller lol.
If you want to PM me, I'd be happy to talk to you
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A lot of good advice in this thread. What about talking to a counselor at school and getting some stuff of your chest? There are people who care about your well-being and are willing to help. If the reason you can't eat well and be healthy is because it's not being provided to you then that is also something you need to talk to someone, probably a counselor, at your school. Feeling sad, or depressed, is nothing to feel embarrassed about and just know a lot of your peers are going through similar things. Good luck
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"I am litteraly terrified everyday of what is to come throught the poor relationship of both couple" can you clarify this?
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I hated life when i was 16 too. Since about 2 years after that i have never been happier. Find something you love and commit yourself too it. Fix your diet and start doing something physical. This alone is proven to improve your mood. Life gets better.
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I often feel like you described but I force myself to change my mind set really. When I'm feeling apathetic towards everything as you described, I start fresh the next day :
I go to sleep early, around 10 or 11 pm. Wake up at 6am then I do exercises for at least an hour (jogging, weights, cardio stuff like shadow boxing or anything else) until I feel drained. After that, I take a shower, shave, etc; then I clean my apartment.
I open all my windows and blinds for a while (unless it's -40C or something, but definitely open if it's not colder than -1 to -5C depending on wind) and let fresh air and sunshine in my apartment. I listen to music I haven't listened to in a while and play a fun strategy game like Go or something else I enjoy that's not stressful but makes me think.
Finally, once all is said and done, I feel great and I don't hate everything anymore. I'm not a guy who does many activities or has many real friends, so maybe people will suggest such things instead. But I'm a loner and that's how I do it.
Also, I've noticed that what makes me feel like shit in the first place is wasting too much time doing nothing on the internet. It drains my motivation and even things I normally enjoy on the internet become completely dull. Too much of one thing is simply never a good thing unfortunately. I don't have many other hobbies because I'm ridiculously poor and can't actually afford to do anything that costs money though so it amplifies my problem. The reason everything I mentioned helps me is simply because I'm staying away from the computer (except to play Go) and doing something else for a while.
I can do literally nothing for an entire weekend sometimes... that's when I know I need to change it up.
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It's great that you're blogging about this and talking with people. Keep it up, we're all friends!
If you ever feel so terrified or sad that you cannot work or enjoy recreation, you *need* to tell someone about it (parent, teacher/counselor, pediatrician) immediately. If you're alone then you should call a friend to come visit and talk with you, and if that isn't possible you need to get to a hospital right away (call for an ambulance if necessary) and tell them what's going through your head.
It isn't possible for us to simply diagnose what's wrong or tell you exactly what you need to do to feel better (although there are some good suggestions in this thread, such as correcting your nutrition), and whether or not you feel like medication versus psychiatric therapy (perhaps both) is for you (there are pros and cons of each, and there is no one panacea that I could recommend, nor would I be qualified), the most important thing you can do for yourself is to stay positive, hopeful, brave, and keep communicating with people about your mental state.
Adolescence is tough for most people, but there's no reason to discard other possible causes, such as your parents' divorce, genetics (anxiety & depression are genetically predisposed), or simply your dietary or social habits. The mind works in ways that we are not 100% conscious of, and you will probably have a much harder time trying to get through this on your own.
So go talk to someone!
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On October 11 2011 07:16 ClysmiC wrote:If you don't enjoy SC2 anymore, don't play it. My advice would be to try and find an emotional crutch. A psychiatrist or counselor can be really helpful, but nothing can replace a good friend. Hopefully you have some sort of friend that can be there for you and who can understand or at least listen to you vent about what you're going through. Obviously it's easier said than done, but I truly believe that that is the best road out of depression. I've had depression for the past few years myself and the worst part is not being able to have anyone who understands what it feels like... so I'm still looking for my crutch to lean on. It's the worst, I know. Another piece of advice: don't get into drugs, alcohol, or sex to make yourself feel better, because it just plain won't. I don't have any experience with any of those, and I am really thankful for that because I know that my depression could be a LOT worse if those things let it spiral out of control. This is also a fun read that made me feel better when I read it a while back. It's got some inspiring stuff too (even though it's from Cracked) http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-life-actually-does-get-better/
great post I feel alot like op some days and reading this does help
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It's cause you eat one meal a day.
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Yeah it sounds like depression and you should definitely talk to someone. There are also many hobbies out there that you can try that are more social. Try and meet some friends. My four most memorable times of my life when I felt happiest (in chronological order): 1. When I started playing Magic: the Gathering (~12 years old) and made some really good friends that I hung out with through college; 2. Senior year of high school where I became close with a few great friends and got a date to prom when I thought I had zero chance of it; 3. My last two years of engineering school where I joined the university's Tau Beta Pi engineering honor society chapter; 4. Meeting my eventual wife.
It'll happen for you. There were times where I felt similar to how you're feeling, but I was always lucky enough to find people to be around, and that helped me get through it. Good luck to you.
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Sir, this article just made my day. Thank you so much for linking it.
OP: There is so much good advice in this thread I feel like I can't even comment properly without echoing everyone else. When I was 16 I was extremely depressed. It was to the point where I became suicidal and just hated everything. I started going to therapy and that helped me a lot! Get out there and just try something new, listen to feel good music, and just distract your mind from negative thoughts. Exercise and eating healthy foods help too. I wish you luck ^^
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Thank you all ( I will write personal responces to each of you tomorrow when I have time)! I does mean a lot to me when others go out of their way to help another person out. This next week I will try all of your sugestions and write up another blog next week.
Ill try my best, have a great day guys!
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EPT
