Girlfriends - Page 10
Blogs > itachisan |
BlueSpace
Germany2182 Posts
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ShloobeR
Korea (South)3803 Posts
tasted like feet >: ( | ||
jarrydesque
584 Posts
On June 20 2011 17:09 ILOVEKITTENS wrote: Okay I got your back man. You say you want Korean fob girls, and that they are only attracted to Korean fob guys? And you are Chinese? Follow these steps and you will be eating bibimbap and sexing it to 2 pm in no time. PART 1: APPEARANCE Step 1: Attire Appearance and first impressions are everything. I imagine you know this already, because that is what has garnered the existing amount of success you have with these women (apparently none beyond the occasional eye contact and maybe a joke to one of their close friends later). Think about it logically, here are the rules you have yourself determined from your environment: 1. Korean girls go for Korean dudes 2. Korean girls ignore other dudes 3. Korean girls ignore you What does this mean? It means that you need to become a Korean dude. This is a lot easier than it sounds. All you have to do is go here and get some trendy, tight-fitting stuff. Remember, accessories are essential. Nothing says "I'm so fob my semen tastes like kimchi" like some manly accessories. Bracelets, necklaces. sunglasses, a poppin' watch, some sort of belt clip or strap that screams Seoul. Basically, look at these pictures and any kpop celebrity. Picture 1 Picture 2 Must haves:
Being sexy is rarely cheap. Sometimes you have to sell your soul for it. I have given up more for Korean pussy in my day, though, so I say you should spend at least half of your life savings on this transformation (if you have less than $1k in the bank you have to fix that first before you can hope to get a 'fob' girl, they love shopping). Also, make sure the clothes you buy match. Just because a top looks good and a pair of jeans look good, doesn't mean they will work together. Same goes for all your accessories. Which is why you need many, many, many articles of everything. If they catch you wearing the same-ass outfit every week, you can forget your dreams of spicy katsu pussy. Step 2: Haircut A brief google search shows an observable trend: most famous, young, and attractive Korean men fall into one of a few hair archetypes. There is the "Anime isn't just for Japs" haircut. The "I spent 15 minutes to make my hair look messier" look. The typical Asian spike helmet. The "I would be an emo kid if I wasn't too fuckin cool for it" haircut. As you can see, most of these require medium-to-long hair, so you probably will have to go with the spikes until your hair grows out long enough for you to choose one of the above that suits your facial structure the best. I would suggest going with either the Anime or Emo archetypes if your Chinese heritage is too obvious. Most essential part of this is: If it's not Gatsby, they will know. They can smell it. Trust me. Step 3: Fitness In case you haven't noticed, most Korean 'fob' guys are slim at best, devastatingly thin at worst. I don't want to go into too much detail here because I don't know what your body shape is like, but to wear tight-fitting contour dress shirts with rolled up sleeves and skinny jeans, you need to be thin. Otherwise you look like a sad wanna-be in denial, like those fat girls at parties that have their saggy cleavage exposed to the midriff because they deluded into thinking any part of them can be aesthetically pleasing. Except even drunk Korean girls won't hit on you. True story. Step 4: Finishing touches Cigarettes. All Korean fobs smoke cigarettes. Get in the habit of it. Better be Asian import cigarettes, too. Otherwise you are getting white-washed in their eyes. This will also help you with your anorexic endeavor to fit into 28 waist girl jeans marketed to men that must be eunuchs. That distant hazy look that makes you seem wholly disinterested in everything. Acquire a direct but an un-intrusive walking style. Nothing says that you just got a fake driver's license at your local Korean church than the fact that you don't want to have anything to do with anyone, and the way to portray that is by walking from a to b as directly an unconfrontationally as possible. Because there be AMERICANS about. Shibal kissekyo. PART 2: MENTALITY So, you must think that you're almost a Korean fob already. You might even start thinking or acting like one. And you are right - you already have 90% of the attributes that define this sub-class of human being. However, the selling point is how you approach your new skin. If you were trying to be a goth kid, even if you had all the chains and black nail polish that you could buy from Spencer's, you wouldn't be accepted at the next morbid gathering of self-imposed depression with a grin on your face and a sparkle in your eye. The same idea applies here. It's like an actor, in a movie - you are not playing a role, you ARE the role. The sooner you believe it, the sooner they will. How successful you are at this point is purely dependent on how much effort you are willing to put in. Here are some approaches: 1. Learn some basic Korean and Korean slang. This shouldn't be that hard after Chinese. This will help sell your image. You should say that you moved to some foreign country when you were young, though, so your Korean is limited. I would go with some obscure European country that probably has good shopping and an obscure culture that will make you unique. Like Sweden. That way you can pretend to know a language they don't know, that isn't Asian (all Asian people hate Asian people from other Asian countries, but that is obvious). Exotic. 2. Speak less and choose your words carefully. Speaking too much is a sign that you care too much. Being overly excited or hateful towards something does too. You are only allowed to hate all things Americans, Chinese, Japanese, and bad clothes/accessories/hairstyles from now on. Everything else is to be treated with indifference. 4. Study up on your kpop. You can't be left out of the loop - the media is your source for everything. Latest styles, gossip, suicides, everything. Here you go. 5. The same disinterest they showed to you - that is how you have to treat them, at first at least. No more of that... Wait you're not white, so I can't say yellow fever... Well, anyway, you know what I am talking about. The second you show them that you want them badly, they know that you are not worth their time, because any man that gives them so much attention is clearly below them. I hope this helps. FIGHTING! Hahahaha, utter brilliance. | ||
SeriouR
Spain622 Posts
Salud | ||
Flonomenalz
Nigeria3519 Posts
Best post on any forum ever. | ||
Chopin-
United States11 Posts
On June 21 2011 19:46 Eufouria wrote: This is the greatest post I've read on teamliquid so far. Do you have any advice for how I can pretend to be Korean? (ps I'm white) 1. Start writing/typing in circles and lines. 2. Dye your hair black and keep saying anyeong. 3. Eat lots of kimchi so your semen can taste like it. | ||
Liquid`Drone
Norway28448 Posts
here's the answer to this and all future girl blogs 1: whatever your parents think only matter to a certain degree. it's impossible for any of us to evaluate just how important the opinion of your parents is because we don't know how your relationship is. but it's generally a really really bad idea (in today's modern world) to settle for someone you're not happy with.. take your time, now that you are an adult in university you are permitted to be your own lord and master. 2: be yourself and do your own thing, don't be influenced by how others view you. except if you suck. if you suck, you should change. I can't actually stress this enough. 3: girls are humans, not games. interact with them the way you interact with normal people and stuff won't be that difficult. maybe you'll get slightly less laid through just being a normal person than through being a cynical two-faced bastard who makes light jabs to send off an aura of security and confidence even though your actions indicate that you're a complete jackass who lacks the confidence to be yourself, but the overall outcome is far preferable. 4: your brain will play tricks on you and make you think that people evaluate you based on the same criteria you evaluate them based on. this is why you see that people who are cynical, attribute the same type of mindset in other people. this is why people who are caught cheating oftentimes justify themselves and their actions through the claim that everyone cheats. this is why normally, guys who are scammed or tricked, are really nice guys; they assume that others aren't out to hurt them because they're not out to hurt others. But this notion, that people judge people based on the same criteria, is not actually the case - people have vastly different and largely individualized ways of judging other people. judging by OP, he cares a lot about his looks, he thinks others care alot about his looks, and he judges others based on their looks. that's fair enough. however, not only that - while people have different attributes they care more about, they also don't even think the same. one person's genius is another person's idiot, and the same applies to looks and humour and personality as well. Thus, OP: if you find yourself not attracting the girls you think you should be able to attract, there are three or so possible reasons. 1: you suck and you should change. 2: girls perceive you differently from how you perceive you. 3: the girls you are attracted to are attracted to different attributes than you are attracted to. | ||
Stiver
Canada285 Posts
The only real differences amongst peoples is an individual culture. Chinese and Koreans are so genetically similar the only real way to tell them apart is culturally, language and customs. This is not "multiracial" at all. IF Korean want to "preserve the blood" or some garbage, mating with a Chinese or anyone other culture in the same region is the exact same thing as mating with a Korean. Sorry, it's the same thing with European and African regions. NOT ENOUGH GENETIC DIFFERENCES. I'll be happy when all the old ignorant people die off so we don't even have to think of anything being "multi-racial". Anyone who won't date someone because of a specific culture is not someone worth dating. True story. | ||
AmarIE
Canada4 Posts
No matter how great I think I am, the guys I like show no interest in me. Maybe it's cuz I have celebrity standards and all I am is some loser girl posting on TL about my love problems. That's besides the point, I am awesome. WHY CANT ANYONE SEE THAT???? But the ugly guys who chase me, pshhhh whatever. Anyways, advice? | ||
where
144 Posts
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where
144 Posts
my advice is to treat your lovesick short chinese man the same way you would treat a lvl 1 pokemon. they start out cute and useless, but with time, devotion, and proper training it will evolve into a legendary creature (eventually). dont lose faith lol | ||
GreEny K
Germany7312 Posts
On June 20 2011 14:42 itachisan wrote: Well who doesn't want a kpop star standard gf? And yeah that's whats happening, but it doesnt matter to me much though. If i see a girl that i like, i'll pursue. I just call that high standards. I am the same way. On the bros before hoes topic, fuck that. If you like a girl, your friend should back off not the other way around... | ||
fishjie
United States1519 Posts
This will put you into the diamond leagues if you study it enough: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-TLWOwbW24 | ||
Sm3agol
United States2055 Posts
In my somewhat limited experience with Asian girls though, three things matter. Be tall, be skinny, have gosu hair. I am 6'3", am quite skinny, and i am quite the Asian mom slayer. Sadly, none their daughters interest me in the least, them either being stuck up snobs, "OMFG TAKE A BATH," or already locked down types. | ||
Chill
Calgary25951 Posts
On June 22 2011 02:16 GreEny K wrote: On the bros before hoes topic, fuck that. If you like a girl, your friend should back off not the other way around... That IS bros before hoes... | ||
LuckyMacro
United States1482 Posts
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SirFrancisBacon
Australia4 Posts
Only if you call dibs first. Otherwise it's fair game. | ||
ProjectVirtue
Canada360 Posts
I find that under most circumstances, the girls who are interested in me, I am not remotely into them whatsoever (hence, consequently and inevitably I treat them rather cold and they just quit), or the fact is that I become fond of a girl, but she is not interested (OR one of my friends becomes interested in her as well out of the blue and being the "Bros before Hoes" guy that I am, I just let it go). This. it's been plaguing me for the past 5 years. There's an awkward complex of girls who are a year younger than me as well as those who are the same age being obsessed with how much i "look like a korean pop celeb" and become infatuated with me for such a silly reason. Often more times than not, they are horrible conversational partners. No sense of wit, pretty shallow sense of humor and interests, not very logical, rational, or critical in their thought process resulting in the inability to analyze situations properly and consistently misconstruding statements. Thus, i'm left waiting until i find a girl that i'm interested in. Concerning your situation, i share a more mild experience. My parents were against me and my first caucasian girlfriend many years ago but having entered university, they don't really care who i date. Unlike your parents however, i dont receive lectures about finding a girlfriend. Conversely, my mom thinks every girl out there is after my looks and trying to "trick" me to wasting money on them which results in her seemingly interrogating almost every female friend that i bring over >_> I think you'll just have to be patient in your scenario like me. Can't rush these kind of things i suppose. | ||
Dagobert
Netherlands1858 Posts
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jazzbassmatt
United States566 Posts
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