We emerged victorious (I don't know why the image keeps skewing and rotating. It looks fine on imgur)
It was a pretty epic endeavour, but I was actually amazed at how simple it was. The ingredients turned out to be about 1/8th the price that you would pay at a store, and was actually really fun to make. It was/is really really good too-- on par with good korean kimchi you'd get at a specialty store, better than most-- and that's saying a lot because I'm damn picky when it comes to kimchi.
Since EVERYONE here loves Kimchi, I decided to make my first blog post on how to make it. Most of what you need can be found at any grocery store, but you'll possibly need to get to an Asian grocery store for a few things.
You will need
1 Napa Cabbage + Show Spoiler +
Heres a pic. They often come wrapped in plastic wrap.
1 to 1 1/2 cups of hot pepper flakes (maewon gochu) + Show Spoiler +
Basically if its a package of red pepper flakes and there is korean writing on it then its the right stuff. If you want it more spicy, use 1 and a half cups, if you want it less, use just 1 cup
1/4 cup of fish sauce + Show Spoiler +
This one will be the trickest to procure. You also have to be careful. Thai fish sauce is usually a lot stronger so you will need less than 1/4 cup.
1/4 to 1/2 a bulb of garlic + Show Spoiler +
a quarter to half of this here
a chunk of ginger + Show Spoiler +
(about half of this much, the size of your thumb or so)
a few chives or green onions + Show Spoiler +
1/2 of a medium sized onion + Show Spoiler +
C'mon, its an onion. You know what they look like. Half of one of them
1/2 cup (or so) salt, if you're salting them, otherwise, 3tbsp of salt.
1/8 cup flour (any kind, traditionally its rice flour)
3 Tablespoons of sugar + Show Spoiler +
EDIT: intoyourrainbow suggests using apple or asian pear rather than sugar-- I think this is an incredible idea. If so, make sure to cut them fairly small.
First of all, you want to wash off the surface of the cabbage. Easy peasy.
Next you need to render the cabbage floppy. You have two choices. 1) Salting, or 2) Freezing. (Dont do both) Freezing is easier by far. Salting is the 'traditional' way to do it. They end up tasting the same.
Salting
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Then, cut the cabbage in half lengthwise, from the stem to the leaves, giving two half-cabbages.
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like this!
Make another half-cut of the cabbage, through the stem. + Show Spoiler +
Now you're going to have to salt the cabbages. Salting them transforms them from the crunchy things they normally are, to the soft cabbage like in kimchi.
Get your half-cup of salt, and sprinkle salt on each leaf and stem-- you'll have to open them up individually, to get salt on every surface, but try to preserve the overall shape of the cabbage for now. Since the stems are much thicker than the leaves, try to put more salt on the stems.
Once they're all salted, put them in an empty pot or bowl, and let them sit for two hours.
After two hours, flip them upside down-- this just helps any areas that are less salted to get exposed to salt. Let them sit for another two hours.
Once this is done, soak and rinse them in cold water to get the excess salt off. Make sure you do this thoroughly since you don't want salty kimchi-- they should be floppy and have a similar texture to normal kimchi cabbage. + Show Spoiler +
The floppy cabbage in the foreground is what mine looked like after salting.
Freezing
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Put the whole cabbage in the freezer. Keep it in there until it's solid. (When I buy a cabbage for kimchi, I just store it in the freezer until it's time to make it). Freezing causes the water in the cabbage to expand, bursting cell walls and causing the cabbage to lose its structure. This is what we want.
When it's frozen, take it out, let it thaw out in a large bowl. At this point, I like to take scissors and cut it up into small kimchi sized pieces.
Once thawed, drain all the water away, and gently squeeze any excess water out too. You want it to be soggy but not dripping wet.
Now its time to make the red paste that is the soul of the kimchi.
Put the 1/8 cup of flour and 3/4 to 1 cup of water in the pot (1 cup if you want to use more pepper flakes, 3/4 cup if you want to use less pepper flakes)-- cook at medium-high, keep stirring it. When it starts to boil, add the sugar, and stir for another 30 seconds or so. Then turn off the heat, and let it cool off. After its cool, put it in a bowl, and add the fish sauce and pepper flakes, (and the salt if you FROZE the cabbage rather than salted it) and stir till its even. Chop all the vegetables finely (or use a blender or food processor, I like to chop by hand) and add them to the mix, again, stirring it all until its even.
Now for the fun part-- spreading the paste on the cabbage.
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First, get a tub that is relatively air-tight sealable and will be big enough to hold all the cabbage when you're done.
You're going to be doing this by hand-- apparently some people have more sensitive skin-- if you are one of those people, I'd definitely recommend you wear gloves. Also, WARNING-- DO NOT RUB YOUR EYES WITH YOUR HANDS WHEN YOU HAVE CHILI ON THEM. This should be common sense, but I know people that have done this before. it hurts for hours.
What you want to do when you spread the paste is get paste on every surface of the cabbage. I just did it leave by leaf, and really smeared it on. You'll use up all the paste doing this for all the cabbage. When you're done each chunk, put it into the tub.
When everything is done, you can throw the excess paste on top of the cabbage in the tub--- you shouldn't have very much, if any, left though.
Seal the tub, and put it in a room-temperature spot. You have to let it sit for 2-4 days now.
EDIT: You can leave it for longer if you like it more sour. It won't get much softer though-- most of the softness comes from the salting phase. Thanks Zeal and Cow.
2-4 days later....
you can now keep it in the fridge. Enjoy!
Some recipes using kimchi
Kimchi pork belly
Kimchi Peach Topping
Tips
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-you can use radish too-- if you are going to add radish, then just increase the amount of paste you make. You'll have to sprinkle salt on the radish as well, and toss it around after 2 hours. Otherwise make as normal.
-Another tip, if you feel like making more, just double or triple etc. the quantities of everything. This is a relatively small batch, but it depends how much you like to eat.