I havent been doing shit with anything, i only go to 2 night classes a week and the rest of the time Im laying down in bed doing nothing productive, then the weekend comes and i go out and get all kinds of drunk, but then i dont even have fun doing it anymore, i just go out to have some people interaction you know? ee my old friends and shit, but the thing they are so fucked up in drugs or just live to party and drink and i used to be like that but i dont even enjoy that anymore. So I kinda feel like i dont even like my friends anymore, and the other all went away to college some years ago, and because i was so into partying in high school i never cared for grades there for i didnt get to no university and im here stock in community college, which i only started to take serius a year ago
Im getting fat, im getting a beer belly and i hate it but i dont do shit to stop it, just i think that sucks. I used to enjoy playing soccer so much and playing tennis and i dont ever do it because im so lazy or im hangover and it pisses me off.
I had a gf for like 2.5 years and I havent been able to find someone to really date date ever since we broke up almost 2 years ago, I have dated 3 chicks since then but it just doesnt click i dunno it doesnt work out or i just dont feel the same, and to make matters worst that ex sent me a messgae the other day after not talking to her for oevr a year and told me to call her, I wasnt going to, but today idk i was feeling so weird and i called her to see wtf, and it looked like she just wanted to know what i had been up 2, but just in like the friend way, like wanting to know about my life and shit and then she started to talk about her current bf and asked me if i had a gf and i wa slike wow wtf... felt weird.. now idk i kinda feel sad idk or just weird, wished i didnt call her. She seem to ave her life all figured out and she looked like she was so happy and she knew what she wanted and howm and that she just had a grat life
I decided to quit poker and quit thinking i could make money on it, im just a retarded fish that doesnt have what it takes to be winning player. Today i was so exited to play the sunday tournaments, to get bust out in some stupid mistakes. I won like 2k in MTTS but really lost like 6k if i count everything.
So I decided, my life needs to change right now, no more of this bullshit, starting tomorrow Im going to make some changes.
1-Have a regular sleep schedule, go to bed 2 am latest wake up 9 am latest.
2- Look for a part time job in something realed to my studies ( civil engineer technology)
3-Start running everyday and working out
4-stop smoking
5-study hard for my 2 classes to get As and do all the projects and stuff myself ( lol before i had my sister do everything for me)
6-Start eating right, no sodas or fast food,
7-cut down on my drinking, maybe stop drinkin beer.
8-Do something productive during the day, if Im not working yet.
9- Try to find a nice gf, and quit fucking this girl that has a bf.
10- I want to get closer to my sprituality, maybe Give religion a try, try to get closer to God or something meaningfull in life
11- Stop complaining, and start fixing.
12-start playing soccer and tennis again
SO Yeah pretty hard list, but Im gonna do my best to accomplish this. I think it will be for the better and hopefuly it will make my life happier.
If anyone is interested I will keep updated or something