Today I have officially finished the most difficult semester of my life. And as anyone who's read my blogs knows, it's because this fall was my first semester as a college professor of mathematics, alongside being a full-time PhD student... and working at two public tutoring centers, privately tutoring nearly every day, working as an educational coach at a charter school, and working as a consultant for the ETS. And trying my best to be a good boyfriend and spend time with my girlfriend who lives in another state.
But yesterday I banged out my final 15-page paper for my last class, and then graded my last exams for the semester, and now I am a free man! Not much tutoring during the holiday break, and no more classes to teach or attend! For a good 2-3 weeks, that is, and then it's back to the daily grind.
In previous teaching blogs, I had talked about some awkward or hilarious anecdotes of my early experiences as a professor. I have compiled three more short stories from the last few weeks of teaching. Here is the first:
H 2 Oh my god.
The day before Thanksgiving break, I was teaching trigonometry to my precalculus class. Ten minutes in to class, I was writing some sample problems on the board and one of my students from the back of the room yells, "Uh, Professor?"
I turn around and ask him what's wrong. He gestured to the empty desk behind him. "There's water dripping behind me".
"Are you getting splashed?" "No, but it's hard to concentrate."
I went over towards his side of the room and noticed that a pipe was slowly dripping at one end. That pipe also happened to run the length of the classroom, directly over about six students. Fortunately, the end that was dripping was over an unoccupied desk (the student who chooses to sit there, we'll call him Mike, always comes late to class).
I quickly tell all the students in the row under the pipe, as well as the row next to them, to immediately move to the other side of the room *just in case*. They all had laptops and smartphones, and the scent of lawsuits was in the air.
They all picked up their things and moved to desks far away from the pipe. Less than thirty seconds after they moved, the drip in the corner of the room became several drips along the side of the room. And then the drips along the side of the room quickly became a slow stream of water.
And then the slow stream of water became a sheet of non-stop water.
Now, let me pause for just a moment. I'm trying to teach the motherfucking Law of Cosines, which is annoying enough to memorize, compute, and teach on its own, without it fucking raining inside your classroom. But now there's a waterfall mere feet from my students, and as well-behaved and respectful as they normally are, they're wayyy too distracted to learn any math at this point in time. And it's gotten to the point where they're giggling and taking pictures of the waterworks, and I can't help but crack up because of how utterly retarded this whole thing is.
And it's not just the fact that one wall of our classroom is now hidden behind a waterfall; it's also the fact that I'm getting drowned out (pun intended) by the sounds of this storm.
The way every math class should sound.
So I send one student out of the room to tell the secretaries of the building, and a custodian walks by and I grab his attention. He tells me "Yeah, there's a problem upstairs with the pipes. We're working on it."
Yeah the problem's totally upstairs. Sigh. It was the last day before break, and I was hoping to teach the students Law of Sines, Law of Cosines, and Heron's Area Formula before ending class. But what else could I do?
I had the students pick their backpacks up and put them on desks, and I motherfucking taught the shit out of that precalculus lesson for another fifteen minutes. Once the water started running underneath the students' desks though, we called it a day.
Right after the pipe burst, Mike walks in, looks at his soaked seat, everyone cracks up, and he walks right back out.
You seriously cannot make this stuff up, these unexpected situations you find yourself in as a professor. I'm one semester in to decades and decades of a teaching career, and I already have a bunch of fantastic stories. I'll post the other two stories in the near future
Thanks for reading, and I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday break!
haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
You work with ETS? Hey do me a favor, if you're ever in their headquarters and you happen to pass Satan in the halls can you ask how the fucking fuck 25 fucking dollars is a reasonable amount to charge me to electronically send my GRE scores, PER SCHOOL. I mean, I sort of get it seeing as ETS is a business and their CEO is the prince of darkness and everything but holy cow that's a new low
We had a really similar thing happen in my class last spring. In the physiology labs in the basement of the BME building a pipe burst about 10 min before our class started. The TAs run the lab sections and our TA was like an hour late that day so we all just had the stand in the hall watching it rain in our lab room. Couldn't leave because attendance was mandatory. Luckily it happened before we all went in but I think a lot of the equipment in the room got messed up.
On December 21 2013 09:57 BigFan wrote: haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
On December 21 2013 12:04 Shellshock wrote: We had a really similar thing happen in my class last spring. In the physiology labs in the basement of the BME building a pipe burst about 10 min before our class started. The TAs run the lab sections and our TA was like an hour late that day so we all just had the stand in the hall watching it rain in our lab room. Couldn't leave because attendance was mandatory. Luckily it happened before we all went in but I think a lot of the equipment in the room got messed up.
That sucks :-/ Was there a custodian or anyone nearby who could deal with the problem or relocate you guys to somewhere... drier?
On December 21 2013 12:02 n.DieJokes wrote: You work with ETS? Hey do me a favor, if you're ever in their headquarters and you happen to pass Satan in the halls can you ask how the fucking fuck 25 fucking dollars is a reasonable amount to charge me to electronically send my GRE scores, PER SCHOOL. I mean, I sort of get it seeing as ETS is a business and their CEO is the prince of darkness and everything but holy cow that's a new low
LOL. Believe me, I was immediately called a traitor by all my fellow educator friends for working with the ETS. Being on both sides of the same education coin is really insightful though, and I at least enjoy doing the research (and everyone who I've talked to is really nice and sincere).
On December 21 2013 09:57 BigFan wrote: haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
On December 21 2013 09:57 BigFan wrote: haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
On December 21 2013 12:04 Shellshock wrote: We had a really similar thing happen in my class last spring. In the physiology labs in the basement of the BME building a pipe burst about 10 min before our class started. The TAs run the lab sections and our TA was like an hour late that day so we all just had the stand in the hall watching it rain in our lab room. Couldn't leave because attendance was mandatory. Luckily it happened before we all went in but I think a lot of the equipment in the room got messed up.
That sucks :-/ Was there a custodian or anyone nearby who could deal with the problem or relocate you guys to somewhere... drier?
I think people thought we were full of crap and trying to get out of class first... until it turns out the server room is right next door to our lab and was getting flooded too ^^ Shut off internet for the whole building but we still had to have like a lecture/lab combo in the building next door for the remaining 2 hours of class.
On December 21 2013 09:33 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Sigh. It was the last day before break, and I was hoping to teach the students Law of Sines, Law of Cosines, and Heron's Area Formula before ending class. But what else could I do?
There's the real problem in this story. Those poor kids aren't going to remember this after a 1-2 week long break..
On December 21 2013 09:33 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Sigh. It was the last day before break, and I was hoping to teach the students Law of Sines, Law of Cosines, and Heron's Area Formula before ending class. But what else could I do?
There's the real problem in this story. Those poor kids aren't going to remember this after a 1-2 week long break..
I had considered reteaching it after the break if they didn't retain the information, but I really wanted to get the lesson in before the 4-day break because it was the end of the chapter and the next set of topics was completely different. It was a perfect place to stop.
Fortunately, they actually did understand the lesson and were fine for the exams
On December 21 2013 09:33 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Sigh. It was the last day before break, and I was hoping to teach the students Law of Sines, Law of Cosines, and Heron's Area Formula before ending class. But what else could I do?
There's the real problem in this story. Those poor kids aren't going to remember this after a 1-2 week long break..
I had considered reteaching it after the break if they didn't retain the information, but I really wanted to get the lesson in before the 4-day break because it was the end of the chapter and the next set of topics was completely different. It was a perfect place to stop.
Fortunately, they actually did understand the lesson and were fine for the exams
Surprising but good! I just remember my class having a hard time memorizing the law of cosines formula.
What surprised me was that you learn the law of sines in college. We have it in advanced maths in high school and appearently it used to be in the basic course back in the day. Luckily it's behind me Ninja edit: Wiki-ised the law of Cosines and the Heron's formula and I had that too. Damn I'm smart! xd
On December 21 2013 09:57 BigFan wrote: haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
On December 21 2013 12:04 Shellshock wrote: We had a really similar thing happen in my class last spring. In the physiology labs in the basement of the BME building a pipe burst about 10 min before our class started. The TAs run the lab sections and our TA was like an hour late that day so we all just had the stand in the hall watching it rain in our lab room. Couldn't leave because attendance was mandatory. Luckily it happened before we all went in but I think a lot of the equipment in the room got messed up.
That sucks :-/ Was there a custodian or anyone nearby who could deal with the problem or relocate you guys to somewhere... drier?
I think people thought we were full of crap and trying to get out of class first... until it turns out the server room is right next door to our lab and was getting flooded too ^^ Shut off internet for the whole building but we still had to have like a lecture/lab combo in the building next door for the remaining 2 hours of class.
Damn, how did you get through class without being able to watch any Twitch streams? lol x.x
On December 21 2013 09:33 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: Sigh. It was the last day before break, and I was hoping to teach the students Law of Sines, Law of Cosines, and Heron's Area Formula before ending class. But what else could I do?
There's the real problem in this story. Those poor kids aren't going to remember this after a 1-2 week long break..
I had considered reteaching it after the break if they didn't retain the information, but I really wanted to get the lesson in before the 4-day break because it was the end of the chapter and the next set of topics was completely different. It was a perfect place to stop.
Fortunately, they actually did understand the lesson and were fine for the exams
Surprising but good! I just remember my class having a hard time memorizing the law of cosines formula.
Yeah it's a rather obnoxious formula but the students had a better understanding of it when I related it back to the Pythagorean theorem (as I did for the distance formula too)
On December 22 2013 02:35 McRatyn wrote: What surprised me was that you learn the law of sines in college. We have it in advanced maths in high school and appearently it used to be in the basic course back in the day. Luckily it's behind me Ninja edit: Wiki-ised the law of Cosines and the Heron's formula and I had that too. Damn I'm smart! xd
Yup It's basic precalculus/ trigonometry that students learn in high school. The class I was teaching was for STEM majors, but for those who happened to not do particularly well on their math placement exam (so nearly all of it was review- necessary review, of course- from high school).
On December 21 2013 09:57 BigFan wrote: haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
On December 21 2013 12:04 Shellshock wrote: We had a really similar thing happen in my class last spring. In the physiology labs in the basement of the BME building a pipe burst about 10 min before our class started. The TAs run the lab sections and our TA was like an hour late that day so we all just had the stand in the hall watching it rain in our lab room. Couldn't leave because attendance was mandatory. Luckily it happened before we all went in but I think a lot of the equipment in the room got messed up.
That sucks :-/ Was there a custodian or anyone nearby who could deal with the problem or relocate you guys to somewhere... drier?
I think people thought we were full of crap and trying to get out of class first... until it turns out the server room is right next door to our lab and was getting flooded too ^^ Shut off internet for the whole building but we still had to have like a lecture/lab combo in the building next door for the remaining 2 hours of class.
Damn, how did you get through class without being able to watch any Twitch streams? lol x.x
On December 21 2013 22:28 slowbacontron wrote: That is some ee han timing by you and your student!
I know right? I'm pretty sure I muttered that under my breath at the time lol.
On December 21 2013 23:14 Shellshock wrote:
On December 21 2013 12:12 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
On December 21 2013 09:57 BigFan wrote: haha wow. The punchline was great XD Also, overall, I think you made the right call. Imagine the results if it broke over them ><; Glad that you got to teach the laws though. Heron's Area Formula sounds pretty interesting though. Surprised that I never heard of it
On December 21 2013 12:04 Shellshock wrote: We had a really similar thing happen in my class last spring. In the physiology labs in the basement of the BME building a pipe burst about 10 min before our class started. The TAs run the lab sections and our TA was like an hour late that day so we all just had the stand in the hall watching it rain in our lab room. Couldn't leave because attendance was mandatory. Luckily it happened before we all went in but I think a lot of the equipment in the room got messed up.
That sucks :-/ Was there a custodian or anyone nearby who could deal with the problem or relocate you guys to somewhere... drier?
I think people thought we were full of crap and trying to get out of class first... until it turns out the server room is right next door to our lab and was getting flooded too ^^ Shut off internet for the whole building but we still had to have like a lecture/lab combo in the building next door for the remaining 2 hours of class.
Damn, how did you get through class without being able to watch any Twitch streams? lol x.x
I'm a good student. I pay attention in class D:
That's good to hear It's probably too hard to write a LR of a game while in class anyway!
Hey, first year Math student I am. Just beat the shit out of my analysis and lineair algebra finals only one more to go :D Anyway, I have a job interview for tutoring at some instution, high school level, any tips? I'm doing it just for fun, I don't need the money. I just love explaining things^.^
On December 26 2013 00:17 Recognizable wrote: Hey, first year Math student I am. Just beat the shit out of my analysis and lineair algebra finals only one more to go :D Anyway, I have a job interview for tutoring at some instution, high school level, any tips? I'm doing it just for fun, I don't need the money. I just love explaining things^.^
Well there's a decent chance you'll have to take a short math quiz on the topics you'll be tutoring (so high school math), so that part you should obviously do well on with no problem. Obviously, dress nicely and look professional; it's a job interview, after all.
But during the actual conversation and interview, make sure you exude enthusiasm and make it clear that you can easily relate to students and build up a good rapport with them. Be clear and coherent and, quite frankly, happy
Nearly everyone who goes in for a math tutoring job is going to know the mathematics; the fact that you're a math major as well means you're pretty comfortable with the math too. The more interesting part (from an employer's perspective) is how you interact with the students... you want the students to actually enjoy working with you, and your employer will be assessing how good you can make him (and the business) look. Smile, be warm, constantly give positive feedback when you tutor. Don't baby the students (if they're at the high school level), but make sure you use vocabulary (both math and colloquial) that your students can understand, without compromising your professionalism.