Chapter 3: Diamonds Are Forever
+ Show Spoiler [Last time on Terrible vs Protoss...] +One thing that I was quick to learn was that just within Diamond League there were more tiers of skill than in all the rest of the leagues combined. Remember that at this time there was no Master or Grand Master league, and even presently there are vast gulfs in skill within both Master League and Diamond League. At this time, saying "I'm in Diamond League" narrowed down how skilled you were only marginally more than "I ladder" because of how diverse it was.
Which is why I wasn't taken entirely by surprise when, after a couple months in diamond league, my Marine Tank Banshee all-in stopped working. It wasn't even a matter of whether or not it dealt damage-- it was a matter of whether or not it dealt ENOUGH damage. With probe pulling, as long as he had a probe count similar to my scv count when the dust settled, he'd be ok; he could double-produce probes and I would be down an expansion. I started facing opponents who would get out immortals and zealots, both of which are good. I fought several fast expoers who used flanks to prevent me from kiting.
The 1 base all-in wasn't realistic any more. Either I was facing better players, or the players i was facing had gotten better at dealing with it. There were no more cheeses, no more build order wins, and no more timing attacks left-- or if there were, I was too unskilled to find and use them. I could go no farther; these people were just better than me, and by enough that my gimmicks and timings could no longer break them. There was no hope.
This is basically me when I realized that my all-in no longer worked.
I could stop here, though: I'd achieved my goal. I was in the highest division across the servers. I was Diamond. I made it. I basically stopped laddering. I played 1-2 ladder games a week, and played customs and 1v1 obs games with my friends. Whenever someone asked, I was Rank 90 Diamond, but really it was just because my bonus pool was huge because I didn't play much, if I had all my bonus pool I'd be near the top, right guys?
I didn't get in through skill, or micro, or macro (though I had some of those traits). I got in because I found a timing window to jump through. I always felt illegitimate among other diamond players, like a cheeser among the greats, an outsider among good mates. They didn't jump through a timing window; they walked through the front door of mechanics, macro and micro. I had gotten my little Diamond emblem, but for what? I was still a noob. My victory was empty. If at that point, I had been still in Plat, I'm not sure I would have been able to get back into Diamond.
And as though Blizzard could sense my unease, as though they knew my secret shame, they took from me that which I desired:
In one brutalizing stroke the system was vindicated and I was indited for my crimes: I was not good enough to be in the top league, not even close. In Season 2, I put in a cursory effort to get into Master League, but there was no way I'd actually make it. I had to learn how to play standard in TvP, and improve my macro and micro until I could win legitimately, but I was not up to the challenge. For most of Season 2, I didn't ladder.
But I stop playing, either... I kept on trying in customs. I tried going for bio mech TvP, ghost-mech, big air, you name it, if it wasn't standard, I tried it with my friends, and got it to almost semi work. Eventually, I went for fast expand into MMM+VG, the gold standard of TvP. Where before I was listlessly drifting at the bottom of Diamond League, the introduction of Master League had given me new purpose-- I needed to get into Master league and listlessly drift at the bottom of THAT league
I needed to improve. Actually improve. I learned how to fast expand, how to pressure, how to scout. I practiced all my matchups, and worked on mechanics and basic build orders. By the final weeks of Season 2, as I returned to the ladder with a new toolbox of standard builds, a toolbox built on a foundation of solid mechanics, walls made out of improved macro, (bear with me, here) and with a handle made out of good game sense, I found I was winning again. TvP was no longer my strongest matchup, though; hundreds of games played learning the standard TvZ and TvT had made me much better, but having only recently begun my foray into standard TvP, I was struggling.
But I am not giving up. Maybe Diamonds are not forever; maybe I have a shot at Master League.
Which is why I wasn't taken entirely by surprise when, after a couple months in diamond league, my Marine Tank Banshee all-in stopped working. It wasn't even a matter of whether or not it dealt damage-- it was a matter of whether or not it dealt ENOUGH damage. With probe pulling, as long as he had a probe count similar to my scv count when the dust settled, he'd be ok; he could double-produce probes and I would be down an expansion. I started facing opponents who would get out immortals and zealots, both of which are good. I fought several fast expoers who used flanks to prevent me from kiting.
The 1 base all-in wasn't realistic any more. Either I was facing better players, or the players i was facing had gotten better at dealing with it. There were no more cheeses, no more build order wins, and no more timing attacks left-- or if there were, I was too unskilled to find and use them. I could go no farther; these people were just better than me, and by enough that my gimmicks and timings could no longer break them. There was no hope.
This is basically me when I realized that my all-in no longer worked.
I could stop here, though: I'd achieved my goal. I was in the highest division across the servers. I was Diamond. I made it. I basically stopped laddering. I played 1-2 ladder games a week, and played customs and 1v1 obs games with my friends. Whenever someone asked, I was Rank 90 Diamond, but really it was just because my bonus pool was huge because I didn't play much, if I had all my bonus pool I'd be near the top, right guys?
I didn't get in through skill, or micro, or macro (though I had some of those traits). I got in because I found a timing window to jump through. I always felt illegitimate among other diamond players, like a cheeser among the greats, an outsider among good mates. They didn't jump through a timing window; they walked through the front door of mechanics, macro and micro. I had gotten my little Diamond emblem, but for what? I was still a noob. My victory was empty. If at that point, I had been still in Plat, I'm not sure I would have been able to get back into Diamond.
And as though Blizzard could sense my unease, as though they knew my secret shame, they took from me that which I desired:
A New Challenger Approaches!
In one brutalizing stroke the system was vindicated and I was indited for my crimes: I was not good enough to be in the top league, not even close. In Season 2, I put in a cursory effort to get into Master League, but there was no way I'd actually make it. I had to learn how to play standard in TvP, and improve my macro and micro until I could win legitimately, but I was not up to the challenge. For most of Season 2, I didn't ladder.
But I stop playing, either... I kept on trying in customs. I tried going for bio mech TvP, ghost-mech, big air, you name it, if it wasn't standard, I tried it with my friends, and got it to almost semi work. Eventually, I went for fast expand into MMM+VG, the gold standard of TvP. Where before I was listlessly drifting at the bottom of Diamond League, the introduction of Master League had given me new purpose-- I needed to get into Master league and listlessly drift at the bottom of THAT league
I needed to improve. Actually improve. I learned how to fast expand, how to pressure, how to scout. I practiced all my matchups, and worked on mechanics and basic build orders. By the final weeks of Season 2, as I returned to the ladder with a new toolbox of standard builds, a toolbox built on a foundation of solid mechanics, walls made out of improved macro, (bear with me, here) and with a handle made out of good game sense, I found I was winning again. TvP was no longer my strongest matchup, though; hundreds of games played learning the standard TvZ and TvT had made me much better, but having only recently begun my foray into standard TvP, I was struggling.
But I am not giving up. Maybe Diamonds are not forever; maybe I have a shot at Master League.
And so in Season 3 I plunged into that purgatory that is the Diamond Ladder on North America. Void Rays, DTs, 4gates, Blink Stalkers all haunted my dreams. Tank lines stretched across my subconscious, as vikings on each side stared each other cold-war style. Thors and marines clawed at my unrealistic TvZ strategies, until at last I was given the greatest ladder motivation I could find:
Link: The 2nd King of Palantir Starcraft 2 Tournament
Located in sunny Palo Alto, right near my home, this tournament meant a cool and easy way to play against other players, relax for a Saturday, and meet Sean Plott (Day[9]). I was hoping to do well in this tournament, and it had been quite a while since I had last gotten coached, so got back in touch with my coach of choice, sPsDebo, and hired him to coach me for an hour. I'd last called on his coaching during my dark epoch spent in gold league, and although it was useful then to an unskilled Terran, it would be indispensable now that I was better.
Debo is a lot of things; he is master league Terran, high quality streamer, and a teller of great jokes. He's also a good friend, and seeing an old student looking for help leading up to a tournament, he offered me some extra coaching. I'd have to pump out about 10 ladder games a day and send them his way, and he'd give me the kind of in-depth help that would make the difference between a loss and a win.
We began reviewing my replays. He'd point out flaws in my macro and build orders, talked about nonstandard play against Protoss and Zerg and its strengths and weaknesses, and generally just provided an extra set of eyes on my play that 1) were fresh and saw errors that i had subconsciously come to accept and 2) played high Master Terran.
He told me to produce a certain number of replays per day for him to look at. By Saturday, I'd sent him about 20 replays and we'd gone over them (not all of them, just some examples; he also showed me some of his). By Monday, I'd sent him and reviewed jointly replay packs containing 40 replays. I pressed onwards into the darkness of the Diamond ladder, not just incorporating his advice, but really evaluating the advice of my practice partners, and critically thinking about what really goes wrong with my play in each game.
And then, suddenly, I was led out of the darkness and into the light. It was a TvZ like any other, I all-inned and won and suddenly realized I wasn't in
What I saw:
How I looked:
(I always look like this)
How I felt:
I don't even know how this fits into my TvP narrative. What I DO know is that I need sleep, and I can figure this out tomorrow. And that it's been a long time coming, and this just means I need to improve harder to gain more ranks.
Here's my stream from the time. I ladder for about two hours; my final game in Diamond League starts at about 1:54:00.
http://www.livestream.com/blazinghand/video?clipId=pla_01ce4cee-9492-4e55-936c-57b54c36fcfa
Thanks to Debo and Sandwhale for all their help. The journey continues!
Diamonds aren't forever, it seems.