EPTGF Losing Feelings?! - Page 4
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j0k3r
United States577 Posts
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moopie
12605 Posts
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JingleHell
United States11308 Posts
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r.Evo
Germany14054 Posts
On June 30 2011 04:59 CecilSunkure wrote: I wouldn't want to be with a girl if she wasn't sure if she wanted to be with me. Flirting with other guys secretly like she did is a pretty big issue in my opinion, and I'd treat it as cheating on me. Mentally cheating. This girl is mentally cheating all over you. You watching porn is mentally cheating all over her. You got what you deserved. I suggest confronting her about this with the intention of asking her the question of whether or not she wants to stay with you, and wants what is best for you despite herself (assuming you want to stay with her and choose what is best for her despite yourself). If she doesn't want to stay and work through the problems with you, or is iffy and doesn't give a solid answer in a reasonable amount of time, move on -don't waste either your two's time. Flirting secretly? You'd do the same if your partner would be all over you if you would have done it in public. It's mentally cheating to flirt with someone? Please lock up your partner at all times to avoid them cheating on you. Watching porn is mentally cheating? So, wait, jerking off is, too? Watching the legs of that hot blonde walking past your table is cheating, too? Please, apply your thoughts to life. Confronting her and talking about it would be being all butthurt once again. You don't talk about staying with her. You decide what you want and take action. The whole "Uh, let's talk about whether we want to continue our relationship or not" will turn any girl off. Relationships are decided by emotions, not by logic. On June 30 2011 05:02 Lysenko wrote: I don't know who you've been dating, but the specific language she used is what people I know hear when their partner wants to break up but wants to put a nice face on it. Maybe it's a cultural difference and German women are more direct.  I don't know who you've been dating, but I had sex with lots of girls who agreed on us just being friends. Actually I had a time where I started by telling all girls I wanted to hook up with that I want to be "just friends". Worked surprisingly well but you have to be a little sneaky at times. =P Yeah, it's pretty likely that it's the whole "flower-talk" to tell him it's over. The point is, just because she says it's over does not mean it is. It's the same as saying "You're not my type" or "You're too young/old/fat/thin for me". You either say "Okay, I'm sorry, I won't ever talk to you again" or you laugh it off and get stuff going anyway. Self-confidence is the most sexy thing you can present to a girl/women. @KurtistheTurtle: 1) and 2) are very solid, however i think most people will get 3) wrong and come off totally whiney and "emo". I'm pretty sure you don't intend him doing a big "oh gawd my life will suck now without you and thats how I feel"-speech. Once again: talking results in a non-sexual relation which results in not getting the chick. Quite simple. Edit: Damn you, USA. Mixed up the age. Most of the stuff I posted should apply to the age of 16 on the girl side anyway, however more emphasize on her unconciously trying to get into control and her feeling less secure. A solid partnership that stops her from pulling that random drama during that age will help her get rid of those issues pretty quickly. | ||
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Antimage
Canada1293 Posts
EDIT: Lots of really well thought out responses here, I'm going to read it after I get off work. | ||
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Grim_Reaver
United States86 Posts
Right now, it sounds like you aren't happy. It sounds like you haven't been happy for a while. It sounds like she isn't happy either. If neither of you are happy being with each other, then it's clear that you need to start trying to do something that makes you happy-either a drastic change in your relationship or break it off. The rest being put aside, it sounds like she's a little emotionally young for you. When women mature into college age and older, they begin to lose that fascination with the so-called bad boys. She's flirtatious with her ex, who was kicked out of his school for fighting? That's the equivalent of an adult woman choosing an ex-felon over you. It just doesn't really happen for a reason...older women need mature, supportive men who are on their level emotionally. If she's still fascinated by the bad boys instead of gravitating towards more mature men, she's too young for you. And although it WAS wrong to read her messages, I understand the temptation presented when you have an opportunity like that in that kind of circumstance. You think you're just gonna change her status, and then you wonder what's in her messages, and then....one thing leads to another. It wasn't like you were skulking around looking for a chance to grab her phone. | ||
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LaSt)ChAnCe
United States2179 Posts
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AlphaWhale
Australia328 Posts
You two are growing up. These sound like the problems of relationships of so many other young couples. Play it out, learn what you can, do what you feel. Just don't act a fool. | ||
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Lysenko
Iceland2128 Posts
On June 30 2011 05:44 r.Evo wrote: I don't know who you've been dating, but I had sex with lots of girls who agreed on us just being friends. Actually I had a time where I started by telling all girls I wanted to hook up with that I want to be "just friends". Worked surprisingly well but you have to be a little sneaky at times. =P It's a little different when you've been seeing someone monogamously for a year and a half. Yes, that kind of conversation may not mean it's over forever, but it's a crystal-clear breakup line for right now. | ||
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OhThatDang
United States4685 Posts
move on from this girl if she sees it as a friendship now maybe youll work better as friends, obviously you wont be friends just saying =D! | ||
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Wyred
United States52 Posts
On June 30 2011 06:05 Grim_Reaver wrote: Just evaluate very simply. Are you happy? You only have 80 or 90 years to live..which means you are already about 1/4th of the way through your life. If you can have one thing to claim about your life that you accomplished, what would it be? I don't know about you, but I'd like to be able to say that I was happy...or tried to make myself happy. Right now, it sounds like you aren't happy. It sounds like you haven't been happy for a while. It sounds like she isn't happy either. QFT. This man is right. They aren't happy. This is because they've been playing LoL instead of HoN. OP could have easily bought 2 copies of HoN instead of spending 100$'s worth of Riot Points in LoL. | ||
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Stratos
Czech Republic6104 Posts
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CecilSunkure
United States2829 Posts
On June 30 2011 05:44 r.Evo wrote: Confronting her and talking about it would be being all butthurt once again. You don't talk about staying with her. You decide what you want and take action. The whole "Uh, let's talk about whether we want to continue our relationship or not" will turn any girl off. Relationships are decided by emotions, not by logic. Whatever. I'm in a nice relationship myself for about a year now, and we talk about things all the time. Some girls are attracted to people that try to settle things maturely, rather than relying on matching her perfect ideals. | ||
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Corona`
Canada37 Posts
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Ushio
Canada868 Posts
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bkrow
Australia8532 Posts
On June 30 2011 03:33 Kentor wrote: Bang her one more time then leave. This guy has a star for quality posting so i thought it should be QFT. Seriously, if she's losing feelings for you, then things seem to be over. It is eventually going to result in heartbreak if you can't recognise it now. Sure you may get another good week, month or even a year but if she keeps "wandering" then things are going to end ugly. As retarded as it sounds; there a ton more other girls out there - one's that will appreciate you and the things you may do for them. For example; i was in a relationship where i thought i was madly in love! Thought she was the girl of my dreams; all of a sudden one day she says "i don't feel the same way anymore" .. i was broken - thought that was it for my dating life. 4 months later i stumble across this beautiful girl, and 5 years later we are engaged. + Show Spoiler + It seems the problems really started happening when you began playing LoL - maybe a better game like HoN would have provided a better solution... | ||
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Zim23
United States1681 Posts
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Lanaia
Canada1142 Posts
In doing this, I discovered I actually did still love him and now I'm happier than I was before. Maybe your girlfriend is like this as well. Maybe she just needs a reminder. | ||
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Tegin
United States840 Posts
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StorkHwaiting
United States3465 Posts
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