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Don't post in this thread to say "gay gamers are like everyone else, why do they have a special thread?" It is something that has been posted numerous times, and this isn't the place for that discussion.
For regular posters, don't quote the trolls. |
On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:Show nested quote +On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least  also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground.
Thats very disappointing
Yet, i cant say your post is wrong. I run that very scenario all the time.
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On January 28 2012 11:51 RoMGraViTy wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. Thats very disappointing Yet, i cant say your post is wrong. I run that very scenario all the time.
It's just the slightly less romantic side of dating. At some point we have to be able to make practical decisions and we just can't compete with women.
I realize there are probably lots of bi guys who prefer guys and would take the "till death do us part" seriously with their boyfriends. But on our side of the equation, it's still a really big risk to expect us to take.
I do think that once the world quits thinking that being gay is icky things will be a lot easier since there won't be so much societal pressure telling you to pick a girl.
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On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:Show nested quote +On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground.
I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties.
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On January 28 2012 12:00 Troxle wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties.
same here! I think there's only been 1-2 girls I've ever wanted rather than a guy
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On January 28 2012 12:04 Roe wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 12:00 Troxle wrote:On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties. same here! I think there's only been 1-2 girls I've ever wanted rather than a guy
Honestly any girl I was with, I was at some point crushin' on a man and any man I've been with has had my full attention. I generally tell people I'm gay for simplicities sake, but when I truly get to know them I fill them in. But most guys around here don't seem too afraid to commit, though sadly I don't find most of them to be my type.
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On January 28 2012 12:00 Troxle wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties.
The problem is those brief times. If we've been dating for several months, and all of a sudden you're like "I'm in a girls phase" even if it only lasts for a couple of days that kills sex, it kills intimacy, every time you see a pair of breasts I'm going to wonder...it's not just a rough patch It's a patch where your (completely uncontrollable) hormones are throwing you in the opposite direction. That can really erode the security that's supposed to come from a relationship.
And just to be clear, I'm not blaming bi guys for their hormones...god I barely understand my own. I think a lot of it just comes from being young and just having an inordinately large supply of hormones to begin with. I bet that, as you get older, you'll settle on one sex. You'll still be bisexual, but you'll have a lot better idea of what you want, why you want it, and you'll be a lot less tempted by the dark side that is vagina.
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Ehh, I never go through a girl phase. I'm a special case I guess. I'm either aroused by only men or aroused by both. If I'm with someone, I devote myself to them. I don't know many other bi guys, all the bi girls I know are the same as me except they seem to pick which they are aroused by (not even sure if they qualify as bein' bi if they can choose their hormones).
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On January 28 2012 12:08 Klondikebar wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 12:00 Troxle wrote:On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties. The problem is those brief times. If we've been dating for several months, and all of a sudden you're like "I'm in a girls phase" even if it only lasts for a couple of days that kills sex, it kills intimacy, every time you see a pair of breasts I'm going to wonder...it's not just a rough patch It's a patch where your (completely uncontrollable) hormones are throwing you in the opposite direction. That can really erode the security that's supposed to come from a relationship. And just to be clear, I'm not blaming bi guys for their hormones...god I barely understand my own. I think a lot of it just comes from being young and just having an inordinately large supply of hormones to begin with.
This really comes down to perspective I think. I have heard this reasoning a lot and it mostly comes from the idea that a bi guy will NEED a piece of anatomy you cant possibly approximate. While I understand this, I think the same logic can be applies to any relationship. Anybody in a relationship is from time to time strongly attracted to somebody else. Sure if it is a guy then I have the same parts but I can never BE the other guy just like I cant BE a woman.
Basically what im saying is that over time I have come to accept that when dealing with the other girl or other guy it is the word other that is key, not the gender where fidelity is concerned.
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On January 28 2012 12:13 Troxle wrote:
Ehh, I never go through a girl phase. I'm a special case I guess. I'm either aroused by only men or aroused by both. If I'm with someone, I devote myself to them. I don't know many other bi guys, all the bi girls I know are the same as me except they seem to pick which they are aroused by (not even sure if they qualify as bein' bi if they can choose their hormones).
Hmm I've never heard of someone who's either aroused by men or aroused by both. I mean, I sorta figured that sexuality was more of a continuum than strict categories anyway but that's still new for me.
Shit...I hate learning on weekends. I'm going back to my whiskey and anime before I start becoming a better person.
@Velocirapture: Part of the problem is that there's an enormous amount of societal pressure pushing you towards a certain anatomy. That's what makes gay guys nervous. Pretty much everything about life in a heterosexual relationship is easier than life in a homosexual relationship. If you all of a sudden get the itch for some vag, society is screaming "GO GO GO!!!" It's a lot less an "I don't trust you" kinda thing as it is "that's a really effing tough decision to make and I don't want to be the reason you're even a little unhappy" kinda thing.
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On January 28 2012 12:08 Klondikebar wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 12:00 Troxle wrote:On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties. The problem is those brief times. If we've been dating for several months, and all of a sudden you're like "I'm in a girls phase" even if it only lasts for a couple of days that kills sex, it kills intimacy, every time you see a pair of breasts I'm going to wonder...it's not just a rough patch It's a patch where your (completely uncontrollable) hormones are throwing you in the opposite direction. That can really erode the security that's supposed to come from a relationship.
Doesnt work that way. There is no "girls phase/guys phase" - its always both, but it always depends what your looking at or with that makes you question one way or another more, and its normally very temporary. Like when, suppose, your with your BF and a super hot guy walks past and u check him out. Same concept, cept it can be with both sexes. I have to side with Troxie too in that most of the time i DO prefer guys, but its just that women dont turn me off and i dont mind checkin em out etc. Its not a swing state. Its always Both
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On January 28 2012 12:17 RoMGraViTy wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 12:08 Klondikebar wrote:On January 28 2012 12:00 Troxle wrote:On January 28 2012 09:54 Klondikebar wrote:On January 27 2012 22:46 Robinsa wrote:On January 27 2012 22:08 FalahNorei wrote:On January 27 2012 12:36 Ankh1221 wrote:
I wish i were gay. How awesome would a gay cruise be? Everyone's eligible. Those guys know how to have fun. trust me, don't wish for that. being gay IS nice, and even has some advantages over being straight, but there ARE disadvantages. alot of them. wish to be bi, no borders at least also, (don't flame me toooooo hard for this please << ), there are theories that I support and believe in, stating that such things like fully gay or fully straight don't exist, but only preferences.... there were cases of straight guys falling in love with each other already, and the stories of gays marrying a woman and raising a family are rather comon. so there, like the guys before me said, never too late to experiment ^^ also; edit: josketh, love your DA ^^ edit2: okay, edited this stupid thingy 5 times now to get rid of typos. damn, me so bad v.v I think being BI is the worst of them all actually. Its really easy to get messed up and not knowing who you are. Gay people generally have a problem with their identity to begin with as well but BI people are bound to think theyre normal 1 second then gay the next.. and no matter what kind of relation ship you chose youre always going to be tempted by what you dont have. Whew, finally got a chance to check one of my favorite homes on the internet today! I definitely sympathize with bi guys. There are a fair number of gay guys (me included) who really don't even want to date bi guys for this reason. Quite frankly, if you put me next a girl of equal (or even slightly lesser) hotness, and told a bi guy he had to choose, he'd pick the girl 9/10 times. Everything about dating a girl is easier than dating a guy in our society AND girls are better looking to boot. At least...that's how I feel about dating a bi guy. I know it's not universally true but it definitely something that makes me shy away from a relationship with one. TL:DR You may get the best of both worlds but the worst of both worlds comes with that too and I don't envy it. Edit in cause I don't wanna spam posts: DUBBLE YEW TEE EFF! Is Doa married?! I noticed a ring on his left ring finger tonight. I am so sad panda but I am not surprised. *sigh* Time to burn this crush to the ground. I guess I'm the lonely 10% that picks the guy? O.o I consider myself bi, but I have a stronger preference towards men and more consistantly only want men, but I have my times of feelin' attracted to both parties. The problem is those brief times. If we've been dating for several months, and all of a sudden you're like "I'm in a girls phase" even if it only lasts for a couple of days that kills sex, it kills intimacy, every time you see a pair of breasts I'm going to wonder...it's not just a rough patch It's a patch where your (completely uncontrollable) hormones are throwing you in the opposite direction. That can really erode the security that's supposed to come from a relationship. Doesnt work that way. There is no "girls phase/guys phase" - its always both, but it always depends what your looking at or with that makes you question one way or another more, and its normally very temporary. Like when, suppose, your with your BF and a super hot guy walks past and u check him out. Same concept, cept it can be with both sexes. I have to side with Troxie too in that most of the time i DO prefer guys, but its just that women dont turn me off and i dont mind checkin em out etc. Its not a swing state. Its always Both
ARGH!!! MY HEAD ALL THIS LEARNING! I guess this is why we have these threads; so I can learn. You bi guys are complicated...I'm still not sure how I feel about it as a purely gay man though. I will probably have to reevaluate my dating policy regarding bi guys though.
But I do know that when you say you're bi it's still really intimidating. Girls are, defacto, prettier than guys...there's an element of competition there that I just don't think I can win.
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RoM, you would be great to have in the mall with me and my friend! And yeah that's a better way of puttin' it though I would say I almost do experience phases (Kpop girls excluded, they are forever hot). And if you've had that happen to you Klondike, I'm sorry (and in my case at leaat the hormone settling thong might actually be a realistic thing o.O). Honestly, I'd prefer to be on one side or the other as you put it, but I don't get much of a choice in the matter, but I can choose how I react in the situation and tgat's what's important!
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On January 28 2012 12:24 Troxle wrote:
RoM, you would be great to have in the mall with me and my friend! And yeah that's a better way of puttin' it though I would say I almost do experience phases (Kpop girls excluded, they are forever hot). And if you've had that happen to you Klondike, I'm sorry (and in my case at leaat the hormone settling thong might actually be a realistic thing o.O). Honestly, I'd prefer to be on one side or the other as you put it, but I don't get much of a choice in the matter, but I can choose how I react in the situation and tgat's what's important!
I suppose as long as you're open and honest about it with your boyfriend then your reaction really is the important part...you better be damn affectionate during that discussion though. That's going to be a really insecure time for your boyfriend.
Ya'll have given me a little perspective though. It's a good thing I managed to make it to this thread today. Bi guys are back on the table!
Excellent.
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On January 28 2012 13:38 Klondikebar wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 12:24 Troxle wrote:
RoM, you would be great to have in the mall with me and my friend! And yeah that's a better way of puttin' it though I would say I almost do experience phases (Kpop girls excluded, they are forever hot). And if you've had that happen to you Klondike, I'm sorry (and in my case at leaat the hormone settling thong might actually be a realistic thing o.O). Honestly, I'd prefer to be on one side or the other as you put it, but I don't get much of a choice in the matter, but I can choose how I react in the situation and tgat's what's important! I suppose as long as you're open and honest about it with your boyfriend then your reaction really is the important part...you better be damn affectionate during that discussion though. That's going to be a really insecure time for your boyfriend. Ya'll have given me a little perspective though. It's a good thing I managed to make it to this thread today. Bi guys are back on the table! Excellent.
Three cheers for debate, open discussion and learning! Hip Hip...!
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On January 28 2012 14:42 RoMGraViTy wrote:Show nested quote +On January 28 2012 13:38 Klondikebar wrote:On January 28 2012 12:24 Troxle wrote:
RoM, you would be great to have in the mall with me and my friend! And yeah that's a better way of puttin' it though I would say I almost do experience phases (Kpop girls excluded, they are forever hot). And if you've had that happen to you Klondike, I'm sorry (and in my case at leaat the hormone settling thong might actually be a realistic thing o.O). Honestly, I'd prefer to be on one side or the other as you put it, but I don't get much of a choice in the matter, but I can choose how I react in the situation and tgat's what's important! I suppose as long as you're open and honest about it with your boyfriend then your reaction really is the important part...you better be damn affectionate during that discussion though. That's going to be a really insecure time for your boyfriend. Ya'll have given me a little perspective though. It's a good thing I managed to make it to this thread today. Bi guys are back on the table! Excellent. Three cheers for debate, open discussion and learning! Hip Hip...!
...Horray!
But yeah Klondikebar, bi guys are a new twist to the scenario, but don't think its held on a knives edge. If the relationship is meant to be, it will happen. I go in and out of women personally, not sure if others are the same, so I try and avoid datin' them so for all intensive purposes, I'm gay, but when it comes down to arousal, man or woman, both work for me.
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Thanks, kentriarch! You are awesome!
I wouldn't be afraid to date a bi-guy. I think that, like all relationships, it is built on trust.
What is more interesting to me is that concept behind transgender dating. I have a hard time fathoming myself with gal who became a guy. Though, in her mind, she was always a guy, I'm not sure how I would approach it. I'd like to say confidently that I would be open to the idea if we had mutual feelings, strong and true. Unfortunately, I cannot make a statement so definitively. It's an embarrassing thing for me to admit, but honestly, I just don't know.
This of course is not a slam on transgender folk but a post to bring awareness to the difficult world they live in. I have mad respect for anyone that goes through it all and keeps their head high.
Have you guys, straight, bi, gay, whatever, ever humored the thought? Are there any transgender people here to speak on it at all?
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On January 28 2012 16:20 Josketh wrote:
Thanks, kentriarch! You are awesome!
I wouldn't be afraid to date a bi-guy. I think that, like all relationships, it is built on trust.
What is more interesting to me is that concept behind transgender dating. I have a hard time fathoming myself with gal who became a guy. Though, in her mind, she was always a guy, I'm not sure how I would approach it. I'd like to say confidently that I would be open to the idea if we had mutual feelings, strong and true. Unfortunately, I cannot make a statement so definitively. It's an embarrassing thing for me to admit, but honestly, I just don't know.
This of course is not a slam on transgender folk but a post to bring awareness to the difficult world they live in. I have mad respect for anyone that goes through it all and keeps their head high.
Have you guys, straight, bi, gay, whatever, ever humored the thought? Are there any transgender people here to speak on it at all?
Never actually given this much thought. I loathe to admit this, but I think I am on the same boat. I don't know if I can definitively say I will be open to such an idea.
Also, there's the anatomy thing for me. I don't know if I can deal with that. To me, a couple relationship is not just feelings but there's the sexual element and that is what makes it special. Though, I won't have any issues building a great friendship with a transgender, based on mutual interests etc etc.
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There are some transgender people that pop into the thread here and there and they can give you insight. Me personally, a person is a person (and I may be shallow at times, can't really fix that sometimes) and if there is a mutual connection tied in with a sexual connection why not? I can't speak for everyone, to each their own. It really comes down to you personally in the end, some people might be able to shed some light and help you decide or reconsider (like Klondikebar has with bisexual men) and sometimes you'll just be stuck on the same opinion no matter what. But its definitely an interestin' topic to discuss.
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I'd rather be one who is entirely open emotionally when it comes to a person, ya know. For whatever reason, I think too much on the subject and find myself at a loss. I'll more than likely have to face it when the situation arises but I just wished that I'd be more convicted in my statement to actually be open to love.
I guess if I personally knew a transgender individual, it would be easier to wrap my head around. The psychology is baffling me.
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my best friend is physically a guy, and I knew him already before he didn't came out as trans. still would be trying to date her, if it wouldn't be for something entirely different (yay for her being religious. no-go for me, sadly XD )
so yeah, its not that hard to come close to a trans, they're not that different from other people (surprise! we're all the same! )
as for the discussion about bi's that I obviously started - sweet science, never thought about it in all the ways you put it oO
as for the "phases" you discribed, never really went through them. sure, one time rather this, one time rather that, but never denying the opposite gender. and I was with another bi guy for like 2 and a half year, without either party being insecure. aside from that one time when I had a crush on that other girl we both knew.... I talked about him about it, and fun thing - he had a crush on her too, and was afraid of what I'd say if he told me. we joked about it for a bit, it went down, and we were happiely mated afterwards as well.
also; reading this post, I'm always baffled by how much you guys value physical looks. I mean, sure, a nice looking guy or girl is nice to have, but honestly, my ex-BF was erm..... not that pretty at all, in my opinion. still loved him alot. am I alone there for that matter, or are there actually others who value the personality-aspect higher than the hotness?
someone said something like "I know a bi guy would pick a girl over me at most times, since girls are prettier in general" - while that might be true about looks, I'd most likely pick the guy, since girls are waaaay too complicated and beyond my logical or emotional comprehension obviously.... someone might scream "but females and males are equal!" erm..... not true. non is better than the other or to be oppressed, but they're CERTAINLY not equal, not sure if thats because of what society makes us become, or because they're genetically bound to think differently or something.
TL;DR: trans folks are totally okay, bi guys/gals aren't as complicated as you'd think.
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EPT
