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This book is an A to Z list of things that define being a man. So far I have read A and B and this is the single most hilarious thing I have ever read.
This thread is to discuss the awesomeness of the book. I will continue to update this thread as I finish chapters, the book is that fucking good.
Polls below, as always:
Poll: Do You have the Alphabet of Manliness
(Vote): Yes!
(Vote): I pre-ordered it
(Vote): I'm going to get it, and should get it sooner if I know what's good for me
(Vote): I might get it, I have womanly indecision
(Vote): I don't think I'm going to get it, I'm too cheap to put down 10 USD for a hardcover Maddox book
(Vote): I'm not going to get it, my girlfriend/wife won't let me
(Vote): I think this book is Satanic, I also understand Ben Affleck being a spokesperson for L'Oreal
Poll: What Do You Think of The Alphabet of Manliness?
(Vote): The Greatest Book Ever
(Vote): Fucking Incredible
(Vote): Awesome
(Vote): Pretty Damn Funny
(Vote): I like it
(Vote): The Wrong Answer
EDIT: New quality poll
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Maddox is funny, but I feel sorry for all the people who take whatever he says at all seriously. I know for a fact that there are many, and that's really too bad. And I know what you're going to say: "they're retarded if they take it seriously" or something to that effect. But the fact is that it's as much Maddox's fault as theirs that those people are offended.
I myself find it hard to think he's always 100% kidding. It sounds too bitter to me.
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I never know when he's actually being sarcastic. If he's not serious about the beat your kids article, I will buy the alphabet of manliness.
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Dude obviously he doesn't think you should beat your kids with a PVC pipe. Jesus.
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wtf the book is out alreadY??!??!?!?!?!
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I'm going to get it soon.
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nope, won't get it, but some options on your poll confuse and bewilder.
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I thought it wasn't out till June or something? I pre-ordered it though.
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MURICA15980 Posts
So it's good? I guess I'll have to go order a copy myself.
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I don't know what this book is about, but it sounds like yet another lame attempt at comedy on stereotypes. Educate me.
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On May 22 2006 15:48 Luhh wrote:
I don't know what this book is about, but it sounds like yet another lame attempt at comedy on stereotypes. Educate me.
Dude obviously stereotypes are made fun of. But it's not the core of his humor like other comedians (like Carlos Mencia, who admittedly can be funny)
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Odin - The Patron Saint of Rearranging Your Face
Odin was the manliest of all mythological gods. Nobody even comes close to Odin. Thor? Please. Zeus? Get the fuck out of my office Zeus was possibly the biggest pussy in all of mythology. His specialty was to roll over and take it in the corn hole. Lesser gods such as Ares, Poseidon, and his bitch wife, Hera, were always pushing Zeus around and walking all over him. The only thing Zeus ever did was turn people into rocks or mountains, and he could hurl and occasional lightning bolt. Ooo, a lightning bolt! Oh no, not that, anything but a lightning bolt! Look out, Zeus the all powerful will smite you just as long as you aren't standing next to a long pole.
Unlike Zeus, Odin was a god who could get things done. Odin didn't fuck around with lightning bolts, he took care of the assailants by smothering them with his giant nuts. Odin was the Norse god of war, wisdom, magic, victory, hunting, and poetry. Yes, poetry. Although poetry is pretty much the unmanliest form of writing, Odin was man enough to make even this most effeminate of written forms rock tits. Here's a haiku written by Odin:
I murdered a man
He had a wife and two kids
I slept peacefully.
Here's a poem Odin wrote one day when he ordered a sandwich, and they were out of wheat (Odin eats a diet high in fiber because cholesterol kills):
Bitch, say what?
That's all he wrote before he stomped his foot up her ass and wore her colon around his ankle.
If there was one word to describe Odin, it would be cocksure. Odin had no character flaws, unless you consider an excessively violent response to minor annoyances a character flaw, and I don't. Case in point: One time some guy went to one of Odin's temples to sacrifice himself in an effort to spare his village from the famine that was scientifically proven to be caused by Odin.
The guy tried to impale himself on a large stake, but he lost his balance and fell awkwardly on the pole, causing him to bleed all over the place. When Odin came down to collect the man's soul, he saw the mess and became furious because Odin hates a sloppy sacrifice. Odin was so pissed that he resurrected the man, ate him, and then poked his own eye out and ate it so he could watch the body as he digested it and shit it out.
Seriously, don't fuck around, just buy it now:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/080652720X/sr=8-1/qid=1148337123/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-6103613-0778545?_encoding=UTF8
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On May 22 2006 15:54 DTDominion wrote:Show nested quote +Odin - The Patron Saint of Rearranging Your Face
Odin was the manliest of all mythological gods. Nobody even comes close to Odin. Thor? Please. Zeus? Get the fuck out of my office Zeus was possibly the biggest pussy in all of mythology. His specialty was to roll over and take it in the corn hole. Lesser gods such as Ares, Poseidon, and his bitch wife, Hera, were always pushing Zeus around and walking all over him. The only thing Zeus ever did was turn people into rocks or mountains, and he could hurl and occasional lightning bolt. Ooo, a lightning bolt! Oh no, not that, anything but a lightning bolt! Look out, Zeus the all powerful will smite you just as long as you aren't standing next to a long pole.
Unlike Zeus, Odin was a god who could get things done. Odin didn't fuck around with lightning bolts, he took care of the assailants by smothering them with his giant nuts. Odin was the Norse god of war, wisdom, magic, victory, hunting, and poetry. Yes, poetry. Although poetry is pretty much the unmanliest form of writing, Odin was man enough to make even this most effeminate of written forms rock tits. Here's a haiku written by Odin:
I murdered a man
He had a wife and two kids
I slept peacefully.
Here's a poem Odin wrote one day when he ordered a sandwich, and they were out of wheat (Odin eats a diet high in fiber because cholesterol kills):
Bitch, say what?
That's all he wrote before he stomped his foot up her ass and wore her colon around his ankle.
If there was one word to describe Odin, it would be cocksure. Odin had no character flaws, unless you consider an excessively violent response to minor annoyances a character flaw, and I don't. Case in point: One time some guy went to one of Odin's temples to sacrifice himself in an effort to spare his village from the famine that was scientifically proven to be caused by Odin.
The guy tried to impale himself on a large stake, but he lost his balance and fell awkwardly on the pole, causing him to bleed all over the place. When Odin came down to collect the man's soul, he saw the mess and became furious because Odin hates a sloppy sacrifice. Odin was so pissed that he resurrected the man, ate him, and then poked his own eye out and ate it so he could watch the body as he digested it and shit it out. Seriously, don't fuck around, just buy it now: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/080652720X/sr=8-1/qid=1148337123/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-6103613-0778545?_encoding=UTF8
did they make a mistake and released it early or what? im about to order this but my dorm adress will change soon as its the end of the year. i would order it for sure if i knew it would come this week, but if i order and it comes june.. GG
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On May 22 2006 14:48 Pseudo_Utopia wrote:
I myself find it hard to think he's always 100% kidding. It sounds too bitter to me.
I agree. He is a legitimately funny dude, and he pulls off the "I Hate Everyone" humor better than anyone I've ever heard/read. That being said, it does wear on me after awhile. In other words, he's not exactly someone I would want to go bar hopping with.
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Australia3225 Posts
Going to order it soon, it will take like 2-3 weeks to get it shiped from the US and probebly another week to get to my house, I should have pre-ordered >_<.
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i don't get it
that is suposed to be comedy?
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"Here's a poem Odin wrote one day when he ordered a sandwich, and they were out of wheat (Odin eats a diet high in fiber because cholesterol kills):
Bitch, say what?"
thats funny stuff
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On May 22 2006 16:03 Pika Chu wrote:
i don't get it
that is suposed to be comedy?
You suck.
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On May 22 2006 14:48 Pseudo_Utopia wrote:
Maddox is funny, but I feel sorry for all the people who take whatever he says at all seriously. I know for a fact that there are many, and that's really too bad. And I know what you're going to say: "they're retarded if they take it seriously" or something to that effect. But the fact is that it's as much Maddox's fault as theirs that those people are offended.
I myself find it hard to think he's always 100% kidding. It sounds too bitter to me.
its satire, its neither 100% serious nor 100% a joke. its mostly exagerated reality. those who can laugh at themselves and their life will enjoy it for the most part. those who dont enjoy it.. well... they're retarded. one thing i disagree completely on, is that its as much maddox's fault as theirs. he can write watever the fuck he wants, if a person gets offended or doesnt like it, they dont have to read it. noone is forcing the words down their throats....
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EPT
