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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On May 25 2016 16:28 Cam Connor wrote: dating your secretary is super weird because there is an inescapable power dynamic that makes true consent on her part a whole lot more difficult/foggy
Yeah there's definitely a power struggle there, and many people don't want work-related strings attached or fallout when trying to pursue a new relationship. As the saying goes, "Don't shit where you eat" (or don't *play* where you *work*).
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On May 25 2016 18:50 Mikau wrote: It's not just about my comfort, I would certainly consider getting over myself with somebody more open and outgoing. If my read is correct, my date is not that person. For the same reason inviting her to my place is probably a mistake.
Guess we'll just stick with the original back up back up plan (bringing board games to a bar). Is she scared about possibly getting raped or that you will try to seduce her? Just because you are at someones house doesn't mean you automatically have to suck a dick. I definitely think it's worth a proposition, if she is strictly against it, then do something else. I personally would enjoy cooking something together more than playing board games at a bar of all places.
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By the way guys. A tip for bookmarking this thread is to have this saved. Change the number to 'last' and it will always show the latest posts. "http://www.liquiddota.com/forum/general/273445-dating-hows-your-luck?page=last"
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Our town has multiple cafes where you pre pay, and then eat drink as much as you want, and theres board games, cats, video games...
Do your research see if you have those, it's what Id go for with a fucked back
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On May 25 2016 19:10 bloodwhore~ wrote: By the way guys. A tip for bookmarking this thread is to have this saved. Change the number to 'last' and it will always show the latest posts. "http://www.liquiddota.com/forum/general/273445-dating-hows-your-luck?page=last" Or just go to your subscribed threads list buddy :p
BTW is the number in your signature the amount of girls you had sex with?
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On May 26 2016 00:01 B.I.G. wrote: Or just go to your subscribed threads list buddy :p
BTW is the number in your signature the amount of girls you had sex with?
Never really used the subscribed threads as I am only active in this one. I just watch Dota 2 and talk about dating 
No it's girls I've met up with. That number would be 4. It's decent for a total newbie in my opinion
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On May 26 2016 00:43 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On May 26 2016 00:01 B.I.G. wrote: Or just go to your subscribed threads list buddy :p
BTW is the number in your signature the amount of girls you had sex with? Never really used the subscribed threads as I am only active in this one. I just watch Dota 2 and talk about dating  No it's girls I've met up with. That number would be 4. It's decent for a total newbie in my opinion 
Number of women you've had sex with is overrated imo. What matters is finding the last woman you'll be having sex with (assuming you want a monogamous relationship)
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It's not overrated when you're a pornstar comparing the amount of women you've had sex with 
Also, I think having sex with different women opens you up to different experiences which will help you in future sexual endeavors so in that sense I don't think it's too overrated. It is however if you solely do it just to get up to a high number..
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Well given how shit I currently am at sex it should just count as 1.
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This conversation made me throw up in my mouth
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On May 26 2016 03:34 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Show nested quote +On May 26 2016 00:43 bloodwhore~ wrote:On May 26 2016 00:01 B.I.G. wrote: Or just go to your subscribed threads list buddy :p
BTW is the number in your signature the amount of girls you had sex with? Never really used the subscribed threads as I am only active in this one. I just watch Dota 2 and talk about dating  No it's girls I've met up with. That number would be 4. It's decent for a total newbie in my opinion  Number of women you've had sex with is overrated imo. What matters is finding the last woman you'll be having sex with (assuming you want a monogamous relationship)
I concur. I'm probably hitting triple digits before the summer ends and I'm not a happier person for it.
Still looking for that last one. Would be kind of cool if the last one would be 100.
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On May 26 2016 05:01 DickMcFanny wrote: Still looking for that last one. Would be kind of cool if the last one would be 100.
Remember not to give her a "Congratulation on being number 100"-trohpy.
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On May 26 2016 04:05 Uldridge wrote: I think having sex with different women opens you up to different experiences which will help you in future sexual endeavors so in that sense I don't think it's too overrated. It is however if you solely do it just to get up to a high number..
I think that's a good point. I just worry that some people tie their self-worth and value as a person to "how many chicks they've banged". As if to say, "I've only slept with X girls; I'm not good enough."
Conversely, I don't think I should feel overly proud- nor should I feel like I missed out- but I've only had sex with my fiancee. Not on principle, per se; it's just that we were high school sweethearts, made it through college, and now 10 years later, we're engaged and in a year we'll be married. No particular regrets, and I don't feel like I wish I had had sex with other women beforehand. She and I are both happy with the way things played out, and I certainly wouldn't trade the great relationship I have with her for sex with a bunch of other girls
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On May 26 2016 05:44 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:I think that's a good point. I just worry that some people tie their self-worth and value as a person to "how many chicks they've banged". As if to say, "I've only slept with X girls; I'm not good enough." Conversely, I don't think I should feel overly proud- nor should I feel like I missed out- but I've only had sex with my fiancee. Not on principle, per se; it's just that we were high school sweethearts, made it through college, and now 10 years later, we're engaged and in a year we'll be married. No particular regrets, and I don't feel like I wish I had had sex with other women beforehand. She and I are both happy with the way things played out, and I certainly wouldn't trade the great relationship I have with her for sex with a bunch of other girls
Living the dream  Since I was on the same road and got it denied, I can definitely say that I would gladly trade in all later relationships to change the fact that my first one blew up. Not because I am still hanging on to it, but because the first one seemingly working out and not failing made me very comfortable. The breakup also made my perspective on the whole thing much more realistic and logical which just sucks.
In the end, living in a serious relationship without the experience of how stupidly and easily stuff can fall apart is just so much better. Plus it is basically living a romance movie. Whenever DarkPlasmaBall talks about his relationship, I think “good for him” at the same time as I feel the sting of having been denied just that. Damn you for making me bitter 
Sex with multiple women is overrated in many ways in terms of experience/performance/being good at it. It can help you get more versatile and speed up the process of learning your own preferences but for your own performance it doesn’t yield much benefit. Every women has different tastes and as long as she isn’t to shy about it and you are committed enough to make the sex all about both of you and not just yourself, you will learn to rock her world pretty fast. You both being somewhat open for new experiences and suddenly there are only very small things that you won’t experience. According to some of my friends, the guys that have had a lot of sex are actually often much worse at it from the women’s perspective. They usually got their experience by casual hook-ups where the goals for both are primarily to have sex and their own pleasure while in a relationship it is more about the we-experience. Apparently the only thing they usually excel in is stamina. I don’t have any real experience about casual sex, but according to those friends a casual fuck somehow vastly differs even from a relationship-quickie.
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On May 26 2016 05:28 waffelz wrote:Show nested quote +On May 26 2016 05:01 DickMcFanny wrote: Still looking for that last one. Would be kind of cool if the last one would be 100. Remember not to give her a "Congratulation on being number 100"-trohpy.
Honestly, when girls ask me, I just say something vague, like: oh, a couple.
I'm not the kind of guy who you would expect to have had a lot of "success" with girls, so they usually drop it.
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For the people wondering, we've decided on a dinner date at a place with blind waiters where you eat in total darkness.
Wasn't planning on doing the whole dinner date thing (wanted to do something at least somewhat active), but with how good our conversation was on our first date it should be good.
Plus, I can accidentally grope now (A)
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On May 26 2016 20:00 Mikau wrote: For the people wondering, we've decided on a dinner date at a place with blind waiters where you eat in total darkness.
Wasn't planning on doing the whole dinner date thing (wanted to do something at least somewhat active), but with how good our conversation was on our first date it should be good.
Plus, I can accidentally grope now (A)
Done that once, it's pretty interesting.
Also, be careful with the groping. You might accidentally grope the waitress instead, which would definitely ruin the date.
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On May 26 2016 20:00 Mikau wrote: For the people wondering, we've decided on a dinner date at a place with blind waiters where you eat in total darkness.
Wasn't planning on doing the whole dinner date thing (wanted to do something at least somewhat active), but with how good our conversation was on our first date it should be good.
Plus, I can accidentally grope now (A) I can imagine you starting to grope her and she just screams (because she doesn't see it coming) .
Also seems a bit weird that you want to go for groping when it's completely dark when you just said she wouldn't want to come back to your place.. ?
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I was asked that once and being able to tell names of every single one of them seemed to impress her.
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On May 26 2016 20:06 Morfildur wrote:Show nested quote +On May 26 2016 20:00 Mikau wrote: For the people wondering, we've decided on a dinner date at a place with blind waiters where you eat in total darkness.
Wasn't planning on doing the whole dinner date thing (wanted to do something at least somewhat active), but with how good our conversation was on our first date it should be good.
Plus, I can accidentally grope now (A) Done that once, it's pretty interesting. Also, be careful with the groping. You might accidentally grope the waitress instead, which would definitely ruin the date. I've done blind exhibition with my girlfriend this way. Of course when we went to an area with stone statues and I couldn't find it she took my cupped hand, ready to squeeze the statue and start guessing what it is, and placed it firmly on the buttocks of another male attendee of the exhibition.
I knew it was love.
With her, not the guy who's butt I squeezed.
Also I'd recommend this activity on 3rd date+ I'd say, definitely after making out after a lot of physical contact was established.
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