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On May 19 2016 08:53 LemOn wrote:
Also subjects are really simple - emotionally charged topics that reveal her traits. Like first day at school, what's her biggest fear, first memory, last cool thing she's done she can remember, her passions ...
The first 3 things are more or less random things that are most likely so far in the past they won’t hold much information anymore, assuming that they ever did. The first 2 are pretty legit in terms of getting to know her traits though.
Somehow lemons posts in this thread seem to always be some good stuff mixed with some (occacionally really) weird shit 
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Some of those questions are okay, but I agree with Laurens it sounds kinda fucked up if I ask her what her biggest fear is on a first date.
...her favorite brand of apple juice, the last time she wet her bed, which monster is hiding in her closet, the last temper tantrum she threw at her mommy, etc.
10/10
Big update coming soon guys . Still on cloud nine, still "behind pace" in the eyes of some I'm sure. Details to come after our next date tonight.
Awesome, good luck!
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I think that sometimes, unconventional questions lead to unique and memorable conversations, which *can* be good, although I haven't had that much experience asking some of LemOn's questions. You also want to make sure the conversation is organic and not sounding pre-planned; the last thing your date wants is to feel like she's being psychoanalyzed or formally interviewed. "What's your biggest fear? Okay good... and how does that make you feel?" x.x
Just make sure that your questions for her are truly conversation starters and not just one-liners that lead to awkwardness. You need to be able to react to and build off her responses 
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On May 19 2016 21:08 Laurens wrote:Show nested quote +On May 19 2016 08:53 LemOn wrote:
Also subjects are really simple - emotionally charged topics that reveal her traits. Like first day at school, what's her biggest fear, first memory, last cool thing she's done she can remember, her passions ... I think this has to be a culture thing as well. If I were to ask someone in Belgium how her first day of school was, on a first date, she'd think I'm fucking weird. The other way around it would feel really weird too, like she prepared some interview questions and is firing them off at me. First memory and passions are the only ones out of those questions I would like to answer, and also have an interesting answer to. I personally keep it simple and focus on the present. What hobbies, what do you study, what do you want to do when you finish studying, where do you live, siblings, how did you meet mutual friend X, blabla. I realise this can also come across as an interview but these questions feel more "natural", you know? The only answer I have to "what is your biggest fear?" is "what the fuck?" xD
Or What are you most afraid of, worked pretty well.
The topics you mention are pretty good... For a meetup with a friend and will make you seem boring, fail to make you stand out.
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I think the only time I've ever used a question like those in that list was when the conversation was already pretty much dead and I wanted to make a last ditch effort to get a conversation going. IIRC I asked her about her favorite vacation, since she said that she likes to travel. Her response was quite literally "I had many great vacations, but no favorite", so I pretty much ended it there and told her that I'm not interested.
Especially in person I much prefer to let her talk for half an hour, listen, give a comment on or ask a question about what she talked about or tell a related story or joke, and then let her talk for another half hour while I listen. Somehow that still ends with them talking about hobbies, vacations and stuff. If I constantly have to ask questions to keep the conversation going, the conversation is already pretty much dead. For me conversations are not question/answer games, they are story exchanges where one story builds on the other and if she doesn't have stories to tell, I become disinterested fairly quickly. Questions can start a story, but a much better way to make her tell a story is to tell a story yourself.
Instead of asking "Hey, what was your first memory" you can reminisce (I can't believe I spelled that correctly on the first try) about how you remember how your mother once stepped on a Lego and then threw all your Lego stuff away in anger or something like that, and that will motivate her to actually tell a story herself. Of course the topic has to be something related first or it just becomes weird.
Then again, I don't talk to women a lot these days, so my experience is limited to the 4-5 women I've dated in the last decade.
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On May 19 2016 21:59 waffelz wrote:Show nested quote +On May 19 2016 08:53 LemOn wrote:
Also subjects are really simple - emotionally charged topics that reveal her traits. Like first day at school, what's her biggest fear, first memory, last cool thing she's done she can remember, her passions ... The first 3 things are more or less random things that are most likely so far in the past they won’t hold much information anymore, assuming that they ever did. The first 2 are pretty legit in terms of getting to know her traits though. Somehow lemons posts in this thread seem to always be some good stuff mixed with some (occacionally really) weird shit
The thing is most of men don't understand women. Love and attraction is a lot more about emotions that for men (nice tits =>dinner=>my place=>pork=>make her my gf) Especially if you want it to be a good, memorable passionate date actual hard information like what either of you actually do is pretty much irrelevant - what matters is standing out and invoking emotional response.
A good date conversation that leads to passionate emotional charge should revolve all around
1) questions that lead to invoking emotional state (e.g. memories from childhood, memories that recall emotions like happy, passionate moments, or even frightening ones).
2) Stories that do the same
e.g. the "first day at school" I'd open almost all my first dates with. My girlfriend told me months later that that's actually one of the things that really made me stand out when I told her it's one the few things I pulled straight out of PUA book and used on a lot of women, including her.
Basically you take the girl for the coffee/tea whatever place with easy exit options on 1st date. Sit down. And when the usual kinda awkward-ish pressure arises you pull your most serious face and say "So...let's start with the serious topics ...Doyou remember your first day at school and how was it?"
And of course I'd have a fun embarrassing (and true) story of your my own ready. You can tailor these to your own life, what feels fun to you, and what stories you've actually had. And you'll have so much fun that especially on the first date you won't ever bother with the super boring questions like what's your plans after uni (lol)
I think this is why so many people don't agree it's normal to kiss during the first date, if you know what you are doing there should be so much emotional charge that if she's not up for it there probably is no point in having a second one as you just don't fit.
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It should be noted that, speaking very generally, the older a woman gets, the more likely she is to detect a canned approach to dating like that described by Lemon. The notion that you can plan your way into a woman's heart is misguided for the most part.
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wow lemon is almost elliott rodgers level creepy
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On May 19 2016 23:46 Cam Connor wrote:
wow lemon is almost elliott rodgers level creepy
#shotsfired
I don't see what's creepy though.
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farva spreading the truth.
And if that doesn't work lemon you can always try to seduce them with candy.
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These ridiculous wonky questions just end up sounding staged and lacking in confidence. I bet having an organic, friendly conversation where you are yourself and let the person see who you are would be much better. If you are relying on some sort of "whoa haha how weird!" response, I think that is going to show and end up making you look stupid.
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On May 19 2016 23:40 LemOn wrote:
The thing is most of men don't understand women. Love and attraction is a lot more about emotions that for men (nice tits =>dinner=>my place=>pork=>make her my gf) Especially if you want it to be a good, memorable passionate date actual hard information like what either of you actually do is pretty much irrelevant - what matters is standing out and invoking emotional response.
According to lemon, I am a women. We already had that discussion (multiple) times. There are men who primarily want to fuck and something more can spring out of it. There are women who primarily want to fuck and there can spring more out of it. It is socially more accepted for men to behave that way than it is for women, which leads to the misguiding observation that most men are like this and most women are not. Let’s once again leave it there.
There are people whose primarily interest it is to have sex with is fine, but let’s leave it at that. PUA for the most part is stupid since its some common sense paired with some manipulation and with a lot of marketing slapped on top of it. Most of that stuff simply preys on weak personalities, being easy to manipulate, being easy to impress and flat-out unexperienced.
Those questions can work, but it isn’t the question, but rather how you present it or either you will definitely end up being creepy. If you in a position/the right person to pull these questions off, you probably could have get a similar result with anything else.
Also, who the fuck remembers their first day in school aside from primary-school pupil’s and characters in shitty movies? Guess you have to get them while their young
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On May 20 2016 01:04 Mohdoo wrote:
These ridiculous wonky questions just end up sounding staged and lacking in confidence. I bet having an organic, friendly conversation where you are yourself and let the person see who you are would be much better. If you are relying on some sort of "whoa haha how weird!" response, I think that is going to show and end up making you look stupid.
Sure but isn't this essentially a reflection of who PUA is targeted towards?
A person who is confident with women and great at organic conversation is likely not going to be reading PUA books for their conversational content. PUA teachings need to offer a solution to the general masses who may not be conversationalists and therefore a scripted question to stand out is probably preferable to awkward attempts at organic conversation.
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On May 20 2016 01:54 Yoz wrote:Show nested quote +On May 20 2016 01:04 Mohdoo wrote:
These ridiculous wonky questions just end up sounding staged and lacking in confidence. I bet having an organic, friendly conversation where you are yourself and let the person see who you are would be much better. If you are relying on some sort of "whoa haha how weird!" response, I think that is going to show and end up making you look stupid. Sure but isn't this essentially a reflection of who PUA is targeted towards? A person who is confident with women and great at organic conversation is likely not going to be reading PUA books for their conversational content. PUA teachings need to offer a solution to the general masses who may not be conversationalists and therefore a scripted question to stand out is probably preferable to awkward attempts at organic conversation.
Then wouldn't you at least want to memorize things that a normal, confident person would say? My point is that by having such an obvious attempt to be unique and memorable, you are destroying your own image. I suppose it depends on who you are hoping to talk to. Obviously there are many sub-par people who would be captivated by shock value questions.
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Next first date Lem0n goes on he should take some inkblots for a Rorschach test 
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On May 20 2016 02:56 Acrofales wrote:Next first date Lem0n goes on he should take some inkblots for a Rorschach test
What does this inkblot look like to you?
My blankee.
Okay, what does this next picture look like to you?
My blankee!
What about this third one?
My blankee! My blankee! I want my blankee!
Okay, fine. We'll resume this after your nap...
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There was a event where you drink beer and listen to music at the university today. I asked my friends if anyone was going and one guy said he, his friend and "bae" were there. Bae meaning the girl he is seeing. I go there and who do I see, a girl I matched with just a few days ago. She looked SO FUCKING AWKWARD. I on the other hand thought it was hilarious. He told me they had been seeing each other for 2-3 weeks.
Sent her a message on tinder a while after wishing her good luck with my friend - just to make it more awkward.
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I hate the direct question: "what are your passions?" Anything that produced a response that sounds like a sale or an interview answer is pretty fake imo.
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Maybe you're not passionate about anything. I find it easiest to talk about thimgs im passionate about... like starcraft! Wooo!
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Just read this article on Tinder and hookup culture: http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/2015/08/tinder-hook-up-culture-end-of-dating. The male interviewees claim they get a lot of matches and hook up very frequently. For them, sex comes before emotional intimacy.
About six months ago I installed Tinder and occasionally swipe a couple dozens of girls. I only got a single match and that girl didn't reply when I messaged her. I find that very disheartening, especially because I live in a big city with lots of people using Tinder.
I get very sad and anxious when I think about my lack of dating and relationship experience. I try to go out with friends and do healthy activities I am passionate about as often as I can in order to distract myself. When I read articles like these, I want to sit in a corner, cover my face with my hands, and cry.
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EPT
