EPTDating: How's your luck? - Page 773
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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Ramiel
United States1220 Posts
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
"Aw.. do you really mean it?" | ||
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ticklishmusic
United States15977 Posts
"Wow, smells just like gorgonzola fondue on a cold Swedish night" | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
On December 27 2015 13:58 MysteryMeat1 wrote: I think this girl might be the worst texter and snapchatter I've ever been interested in Tell us child | ||
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Mikau
Netherlands1446 Posts
How do I play the messaging/texting game until the 16th? I doubt she'll initiate anything until then so it's up to me to either keep in touch, or not. Do I continue trying to get to know her by just continuing the conversation we had (and let her decide the pace with the time she takes in getting back to me), do I just wish her a happy new year in a few days and a good luck with the exams a few days later, or do I not text at all? I don't want to either come on too strong, but I also don't want her forgetting about me in the next 3 weeks. Thoughts? | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On December 27 2015 23:09 Mikau wrote:Thoughts? Yeah I know what Lem0n would say. Don't text. I would probably go with the same answer, if she isn't responding that well and doesn't keep the conversation going (even though she may give thorough answers) just plan the date and say "Can't wait, see you there!". | ||
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Ramiel
United States1220 Posts
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Something easy, quick fast escape route for both of you always off of a 1st date from online dating. I'd always tell them to meet me at a very public known place/street and then lead them to a cool cafe 5-10 mins away where I made a reservation beforehand (Some cool themed places or places with e.g. weird lemonades, stupid names etc. that serve as talking points. I don't drink alcohol on dates personally and wouldn't recommend it.) . And then have more places researched if date goes well, and swap places every 35 mins to an hour. Your idea's good for a second date+ after the previous one went well (Physicall stuff is the easiest to judge by) 2) You don't have a confirmation, this response is pretty much "maybe" and high chance she won't actually go. "Awesome, can't wait to check out some Van Gogh with you girl! Text me once you'll know for sure if Saturday or Sunday's better for you!" 3) Once I send this, I wouldn't initiate anything at all and wait for her response. If it she doesn't confirm, you're done with her (don't delete her or anything though - good chance she'll get back to you). If she does you wait depending how long it took her to respond and confirm (AKA, straigh up tell her "Meet me X time X place, looking forward to it - see you then!) the day and time. And if there's still 10+days to go I'd send either nothing let her initiate 100%, or alternatively since it's a long ass time and you chose a time consuming thing that she can legitimately cause time constraints, send her exactly one statement message that clearly doesn't expect any response e.g. " So this something's (what you talked about in chat) just reminded me of you , can't wait to see you Sunday girl!") Also I have a date tomorrow! With my gf, but she still had to say yes so totally counts  A normal one finally after Christmas festivities. Laser game, followed by GeekCafe with comic books, board games and other nerd stuff. She has no idea about either of course, although I told her P.S. bring dark sports clothes. | ||
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Mikau
Netherlands1446 Posts
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mahrgell
Germany3943 Posts
On December 28 2015 05:36 Mikau wrote: I'm not forcing her to do anything, I just said I'm going to a museum and asked her to join me. It would be something I know she'd enjoy, which just happens to be closer to where I live than where she lives. No would have been an acceptable answer too. The alternative would be meeting up somewhere for drinks, which probably would mean me going to her city. Is the 'forcing her to travel', but it being ok for me just a double standard here? Your idea is completely legit. I would recommend having some "followup option" prepared though. Like a cafe or something similar. I would not bet on her being all that much into art, so having some followup could be handy. And for the texting/chatting: Uhm... just talk about everyday life and whatever crosses your mind? Did something fun, had something that day that troubled you, saw a funny link you would usually share with your friends? Try it on her. It is usually good to see if you can talk to each other outside of "dating interrogations". And often this tells more about the character than any question you could have prepared. This does not have to be a lengthy conversation, no need to force it, usually there simply isn't that much to talk about anyway. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On December 28 2015 05:14 LemOn wrote: although I told her P.S. bring dark sports clothes. yfw she comes in full yoga pants outfit instead of the "nerd" outfit you were thinking of  , I guess that isn't all that bad either though. | ||
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
On December 28 2015 05:14 LemOn wrote: I don't drink alcohol on dates personally and wouldn't recommend it. If a person isn't trying to find future wifey then why not? | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On December 28 2015 06:44 B.I.G. wrote: If a person isn't trying to find future wifey then why not? My now friend who I went on a couple dates with (that's how I got to know her, in my PUA phase  ) basically extinguished all wanting to drink from me, especially on first dates. See on a normal date you escalate physical contact, push the envelope slowly, then pull back...and she just told me it looked like I was just getting more hands-y as I was getting drunk (which I did, she's hot but without alcohol there'd be nothing really, even with alcohol now. I never thought I'd be capable of this, even some buff guys attract me more than her lol). So yeah, alcohol only if I wouldn't be attracted to her without it, otherwise it lowers my success rate and in the end enjoyment too - it's pretty hard to be at the top of the game when drunk. And it's miles harder to give girls orgasms too when they're drunk | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
Well she didn't get a phone till after she graduated hs, and since she isn't a huge online person I can see why her texting game is pretty weak. She's a great in person communicator. Honestly I know its just me being insecure, and her being with her family. I also don't know how much to expect considering we've only gone on like 3 date/hangouts. | ||
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On December 28 2015 07:11 MysteryMeat1 wrote: Honestly I know its just me being insecure, and her being with her family. This. What's the point in texting - text her to setup+confirm a date, and when you meet it will be loads better when she'll have so much new stuff to tell her and vice versa and you'll both be wondering how the other person feels  | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
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GreenHorizons
United States24455 Posts
I would generally avoid drinking being the planned activity particularly for the first couple dates though, as it looks more like you're trying to get into her pants than have real conversations. | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
On December 28 2015 07:14 LemOn wrote: This. What's the point in texting - text her to setup+confirm a date, and when you meet it will be loads better when she'll have so much new stuff to tell her and vice versa and you'll both be wondering how the other person feels True | ||
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