Dating: How's your luck? - Page 313
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
Chocolate
United States2350 Posts
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WombaT
Northern Ireland23767 Posts
On November 12 2013 12:06 sam!zdat wrote: oh, I just hate the idea of filling out the little questions and stuff. technocratic rationality and all that. there is a delaney novel where this big computer filters through everyone in the galaxy and computes the main character's "perfect erotic object," there has always been something a little nauseating about that for me. But on the other hand, the girls I want to date are all staying at home reading books so I don't know how else I am supposed to meet them lol. Haha when you put it like that. For me it's more that there seems to be a massive disconnect between what people are like and are after, and what they say on their profiles to those two things. Gl hf! | ||
sam!zdat
United States5559 Posts
she does phil of math and physics and stuff, so she is on a borderline between humanities and STEM. but at least from her pictures she is pretty much 10/10 for hotness, at least in sam's book | ||
IgnE
United States7681 Posts
I find most online profiles to be pretty nauseating. Tell me again how much you love "having fun." Oh you just love to travel? Oh you like going to brunch? 50% of those books you listed you read in high school or are Harry Potter? Don't we all just love watching a little reality tv when we come home late from our demanding job (it's demanding but we totally love it and wouldn't trade it for anything, but balance is, like, everything, so we are also training for a marathon that we are going to run-walk never) and are just too worn out to think about our "career" any more? -- Go fuck yourself. Look no further than online dating for evidence of the feminization of office labor. | ||
sam!zdat
United States5559 Posts
yeah most people's profiles are pretty lame. I just searched for "philosophy" and looked for people with a high match percentage haha | ||
WombaT
Northern Ireland23767 Posts
On November 12 2013 12:20 IgnE wrote: I got away with a profile that was pretty bare, although I've heard from girls that it can lead them to ignore your messages. Depends on how good your pictures are and what limited information you give away I guess. I find most online profiles to be pretty nauseating. Tell me again how much you love "having fun." Oh you just love to travel? Oh you like going to brunch? 50% of those books you listed you read in high school or are Harry Potter? Don't we all just love watching a little reality tv when we come home late from our demanding job (it's demanding but we totally love it and wouldn't trade it for anything, but balance is, like, everything, so we are also training for a marathon that we are going to run-walk never) and are just too worn out to think about our "career" any more? -- Go fuck yourself. Look no further than online dating for evidence of the feminization of office labor. I wish I knew what you meant with the last part, godamn pseudo-unemployment. | ||
Deleted User 183001
2939 Posts
On November 12 2013 10:14 WarSame wrote: Where are you meeting this girls at uni if not in class? For myself, one of the 6 girls in my Software Engineering class(105ish people) likes me I think, which is cool. Now I have to figure out how to go about this... If you look at my first TL blog... that was the last time anything even close to romantic has happened to me, so I'm not good at it. At events, parties, just around campus even. As a fellow computer nerd, I know how time-constraining CS can be, but I do what I can to get around and meet some people ![]() | ||
IgnE
United States7681 Posts
On November 12 2013 12:28 Wombat_NI wrote: I wish I knew what you meant with the last part, godamn pseudo-unemployment. Seems to me like women are way more likely to buy-in to the corporate work ethic and company "mission." Whenever I hear somebody prattle on about their "career" and how much they love their job in marketing or SEO startup or whatever, it's usually a woman who loves her open office layout at her trendy new company. At least men tend to unabashedly display their naked self-interest when talking about their jobs. Women are more likely to just be thrilled that they can now choose a "career" over "family" or better yet, choose to "have it all", what does Ann-Marie Slaughter know anyway? They don't seem to realize that the only reason they were allowed into the labor force in the first place is because the real power has moved on to make space for some hard-working women who will be happy to work 60 hours a week in return for some undervalued wages. You are there because the people with real power want you there. Yes, I know this is a generalization. Yes, I know men do this too. But compare the tone of online dating profiles for all the evidence you need that for young people in east coast cities there is a statistical difference in the attitudes between the sexes. | ||
WombaT
Northern Ireland23767 Posts
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r.Evo
Germany14079 Posts
On November 12 2013 12:23 sam!zdat wrote: my picture on there is terrible lol I'm kinda surprised she's interested (I don't really have many pictures of myself and it's not like I'm super handsome or anything). she's out of my league for looks (so was my ex though) but it helps that I am such an impressive scholar lolol :D yeah most people's profiles are pretty lame. I just searched for "philosophy" and looked for people with a high match percentage haha 1) Assume mutual attraction. There is no "out of your league" there is only "I'm valuing her above me". 2) The more you're intellectually/emotionally connected the more crucial it is to connect physical on dates. If you ever have the feeling that tells you "wait fuck I don't wanna be just friends what am I doing?!" visualizing some dirty things might be perfect to bring you into the right vibe. | ||
sam!zdat
United States5559 Posts
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r.Evo
Germany14079 Posts
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Sycamore
204 Posts
Later when her girlfriend arrived I think they left. I apologized via textmail in the same night twice and she texted back that I "should stop worrying" and "everything is ok : )". Today I texted her and asked her if she wants to meet up for cooking (because I wanted to see her again and settle things). She doenst answer. Fuck my life. | ||
Aeroplaneoverthesea
United Kingdom1977 Posts
Where as with online dating you know she's single, wants a relationship and so long as she replies to you she finds you attractive. That's all your key boxes ticked right from the off with no time or money wasted. Yeah sometimes you don't connect in real life but you don't connect with most of the people you hit on in a bar either. I don't think online dating is a great replacement for meeting people at Uni/work/through friends etc... but it's way better than bar crawling. Another good thing about online dating is the sheer number of girls you can be in contact with at once, so when one doesn't work out you already have your next date set up anyway. On November 13 2013 04:42 Sycamore wrote: Im such a fucking dumb idiot. I invited this girl I really like (we dont know each other for long) to the houseparty of my flatshare. Managed to be completely drunk to the point of puking (as early as 0:30) before she even arrived. So when she did arrive I could only barely communicate with her - being drunk as fuck and she had only drunk a little bit before (I think) - and had to lay down on my bed alone in my room doing nothing. She even watched me puking when we were both in my room. She didnt know any other person at the party but me (tho a girlfriend of her was coming later). Imagine that shitty situation. AAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhh I behaved like a stupid careless shitfuck. Later when her girlfriend arrived I think they left. I apologized via textmail in the same night twice and she texted back that I "should stop worrying" and "everything is ok : )". Today I texted her and asked her if she wants to meet up for cooking (because I wanted to see her again and settle things). She doenst answer. Fuck my life. Yeah that was dumb. Alcohol is the enemy of picking up women (for you anyway, she can be drunk as all hell). | ||
IgnE
United States7681 Posts
On November 13 2013 04:42 Sycamore wrote: Im such a fucking dumb idiot. I invited this girl I really like (we dont know each other for long) to the houseparty of my flatshare. Managed to be completely drunk to the point of puking (as early as 0:30) before she even arrived. So when she did arrive I could only barely communicate with her - being drunk as fuck and she had only drunk a little bit before (I think) - and had to lay down on my bed alone in my room doing nothing. She even watched me puking when we were both in my room. She didnt know any other person at the party but me (tho a girlfriend of her was coming later). Imagine that shitty situation. AAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhh I behaved like a stupid careless shitfuck. Later when her girlfriend arrived I think they left. I apologized via textmail in the same night twice and she texted back that I "should stop worrying" and "everything is ok : )". Today I texted her and asked her if she wants to meet up for cooking (because I wanted to see her again and settle things). She doenst answer. Fuck my life. Sounds like you have a drinking problem. | ||
docvoc
United States5491 Posts
You kinda fucked yourself there bro. | ||
Zooper31
United States5710 Posts
You are pretty much screwed if you wanted any kind of real relationship with her lol. | ||
VayneAuthority
United States8983 Posts
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Steins;Gate
1422 Posts
![]() well, to be fair, she didn't really seem to like talking but still feel that little bit of regret for not asking. gahhhhhhhhh God, I'm sorry for the incoherency lol. | ||
slytown
Korea (South)1411 Posts
On November 13 2013 16:25 Steins;Gate wrote: Just feel like ranting a little bit. So basically today I was a guinea pig for some psych experiment and a really really cute girl was also part of it. So yade yade we did what we were told to do. When it was over, I mustered up the courage to talk to her but I forgot to ask her for her number. ![]() well, to be fair, she didn't really seem to like talking but still feel that little bit of regret for not asking. gahhhhhhhhh God, I'm sorry for the incoherency lol. Always ask. Not right away: get some chat going first. Then ask her to do something drink-wise with you: alcohol or coffee; unless of course you find out u have some special interest or want to study with her. Then by all means skip the liquid and endulge your mutual interest. Don't forget she's just a girl; not your soul mate. Plenty of girls out there; there's no one good-one. | ||
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