EPT
How to deal with grief?
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peanuts
United States1225 Posts
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Torte de Lini
Germany38463 Posts
Sorry I can't give better advice. | ||
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darthfoley
United States8004 Posts
I'm sorry for her, her family, and her friends. No one deserves that. RIP | ||
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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Fecalfeast
Canada11355 Posts
Having someone to vent with is something nobody should take for granted. Support is invaluable. | ||
BigFan
TLADT24920 Posts
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MetaKnight
Canada9 Posts
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CosmicSpiral
United States15275 Posts
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Darkdwarf
Sweden960 Posts
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Pandain
United States12989 Posts
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Capped
United Kingdom7236 Posts
 Do what makes you vent - provided it isnt illegal or harms others - you should 100% do what lets you work out the pent up emotion. Whether its crying, withdrawing into gaming, punching stuff, jogging, whatever, just do it, it'll help. | ||
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Oboeman
Canada3980 Posts
turn that emotional energy into something creative. not for sharing, just to ease the pain of cooking in it. | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States45387 Posts
I'm sorry for your loss Whenever I've lost a close friend or family member, it's taught me to appreciate my life and the lives of my other friends and family members even more. | ||
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The_Templar
your Country52797 Posts
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The_Australian
Australia458 Posts
all the best. | ||
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docvoc
United States5491 Posts
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itsjustatank
Hong Kong9169 Posts
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Cascade
Australia5405 Posts
I'll try some advice, but I can only tell you what is true for me, so take what you feel applies to your situation. On a very general level, I think it is better to do things than to not do things. So go ahead and cry or punch things (maybe get something that's not too expensive), go for long walks/runs/bikes/..., shout at things or people, or whatever you may feel like. Within limits ofc (apologise if appropriate, they'll understand), but to let things out. + Show Spoiler + A personal experience would be going on my inlines for hours in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep after a breakup. Partially this may help you get closure as Torte mentioned, and you may also come out a better person on the other side, confident that you can handle things, doing what is needed. As opposed to bottle up emotions which often is not a great idea. Bonus points if you can help support others that are affected. Good luck. | ||
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y0su
Finland7871 Posts
Time. Comfort with others that are suffering as well (her family, friends etc). Having someone to talk to helps a lot - even writing more (sometimes just writing and deleting after it's all written). | ||
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virpi
Germany3599 Posts
So my advice would be: Don't stay alone. Talk to other friends, talk to your family. Look for people you love. And yes, it takes time. You can't force anything. | ||
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TojoZ
United Kingdom13 Posts
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Olli
Austria24422 Posts
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dravernor
Netherlands6192 Posts
I think everyone has given great advice, no need for repeating it, but yeah. It is a horrible horrible thing, especially at such a young age. | ||
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WonnaPlay
Netherlands912 Posts
On September 12 2014 19:50 virpi wrote: Six years ago, one of my best friends committed suicide. At first, I didn't really realize what had happened. It took time to really understand the meaning of such a loss. What helped me through those troubled times were my other friends. After we had got the news, we all met up in a house and stayed there for some days. It was lots of silence, lots of crying, lots of holding each other. Being able to grieve together made things a lot easier. The emptiness we all felt inside was filled by the realization that we were not alone. After the first hours of pure shock, we started talking about it. About him, about our relationship. Of course, we asked ourselves if we could have done anything to prevent his suicide. But we soon realized that this led to nothing but sore regrets. So we focused on moving on. Remembering our friend as the kind and lovely guy he had been. Our friendship grew stronger. And even though I still miss him a lot (he would have turned 30 a few days ago), I now know that I'm not alone. So my advice would be: Don't stay alone. Talk to other friends, talk to your family. Look for people you love. And yes, it takes time. You can't force anything. I was about to write a wall of text, but Virpi here has described bassically the exact same details of my story, so I will just +1 this. This is exactly what I did with my friends when one of my best friends also comitted suicide. 9 years ago already.. He just turned 18 back then OP : This is a terrible thing to hear and I hope you can share this with friends who also knew her. For me it was christmass eve, and at New Years I went to my mates who also knew him very well, and we'd just spent the whole night talking the good stories. Don't get yourself in a negative spiral, I had hidden this from some of my other friends and it kept getting worse, to the point that we went to the movies with a few friends and I just started crying out of nowhere, after someone joked something (we were also close by the spot where he came to an end). So as many people suggested, talk , let it out, don't crop it up. I think you just posting this here is already a good start! | ||
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Trasko
Sweden983 Posts
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Bereft
United States1007 Posts
like others have already said, talk and share your grief with friends and family. spending time and remembering the good things about her with those who also knew and loved her can really help. | ||
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Yorkie
United States12612 Posts
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DepressedOne
United States190 Posts
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