It wouldn't bother me, and I'm pretty sure it wouldn't bother most guys. Girls, however would be furious.

With my gf, there's some debate as to what date our anniversary actually is.

DarkPlasmaBall

United States45433 Posts

January 17 2012 14:16 GMT

#42

I've been with my girlfriend for the better part of six years...

Don't worry too much about how you can't hit the exact date for the anniversary; you can still celebrate it a few days (or even a week or so) off

Sometimes, other things will get in the way of future plans and holidays (anniversaries, valentine's days, birthdays, etc.), and so you'll have to be a bit flexible with the idea of moving around celebrations for these days, regardless of whether you like what she's doing instead of seeing you.

I went through a long distance relationship with my girlfriend, throughout college. We saw each other when we could, and those were the times that were important. If our anniversary happened to land in the middle of a school week for both of us, we waited until a weekend or another free piece of time. What's important is that you eventually get to spend time with her. Your girlfriend obviously finds it important to spend time with her family as well, and that's better than her not wanting to spend time with family. Don't worry about this one

ishboh

United States954 Posts

January 17 2012 14:30 GMT

#43

caring about spending time with your gf is a good thing, but having the date not falling on exactly your anniversary is not a big deal, it happens all the time for all sorts of events. just celebrate it at the closest convenient time for both people. you wouldn't want to go on the date anyway if your gf was distracted by the fact that she wants to spend time with her sister

drgoats

United States310 Posts

January 17 2012 14:38 GMT

#44

So you see her all the time. You have her all to yourself the following weekend. She hasn't seen her sister in over a month. I think you should completely understand her wanting to see her sister. That is actually a great characteristic in her. She obviously really cares about her family.

It's not a big deal to not celebrate it on the actual day of the anniversary. If things are successful between you two then there will be many more holidays, birthdays and anniversaries.

But I do have one question. Why can't there be some sort of compromise? I am not too sure how much time you spend with her family but if they are doing something special for her return, shouldn't you be involved? And the final question is do you want to be there?

Popsicler

United States40 Posts

January 17 2012 14:50 GMT

#45

I think anniversarys and things of that nature are for women. So if she wants to let it slide by , I don't see why it should bother you. No need to look any further into the meaning of it IMO.

Bobbias

Canada1373 Posts

January 17 2012 14:51 GMT

#46

Been with my GF for 7+ years. We've never done anything super special on our anniversary.

I'd say that she should actually include you on that day, rather than leave you out of it, but if she chooses not to involve you there's not much you can do about it.

Relationships are about compromise, and sometimes you need to practice with compromise with real life. Things don't always work out the way you'd like them to, and sometimes all you can do is deal with it and move on.

I know that 1 year feels like a long time at first, and it is definitely a a milestone, but if you're in a truly stable relationship that is going to last, 1 year really isn't a big deal.

kanada

Canada255 Posts

January 17 2012 14:53 GMT

#47

I don't think it is that big of a deal, I can see being upset that she wanted to see her sister over you without discussing it with you. But really if you are going to see eachother that weekend and have plans just celebrate it then, if this is a meaningful relationship you will have plenty of other anniversaries and such. I have been with my girlfriend for over 6 years and parts of that have been long distance. Often times we have to miss important dates and even when we are in the same area we often miss events for having to live our lives.

The important part is that if it is important to you, you tell her that and then have a special day at some other time.

Randomaccount#77123

United States5003 Posts

January 17 2012 14:55 GMT

#48

--- Nuked ---

ThePhan2m

Norway2751 Posts

January 17 2012 15:05 GMT

#49

I think she would appreciate if you invited her out another day to mark the occation.
You seem to be over reacting. All in all its just a day.

Azzur

Australia6260 Posts

January 17 2012 15:07 GMT

#50

Man, when I get time alone to play games or watch SC2, I'm so happy! Don't make a big deal out of it and she'll reward you 10-fold.

Zortch

Canada635 Posts

January 17 2012 15:29 GMT

#51

If it's important to /you/ to do something on the day then make sure she is aware of it and just work around her schedule as best you can.
Also, don't be too surprised that she puts her sister above you in some ways. You have been together 1 year she has been with her sister for her whole life (less 3 years).

Cambium

United States16368 Posts

January 17 2012 15:33 GMT

#52

wtf, not a big deal at all

rek is right

Chef

10810 Posts

January 17 2012 15:34 GMT

#53

I think your family is just trying to be supportive and doesn't actually care that much / are zealously defending you.

The most you could expect is seeing her sister come back from the airport and hanging out with their family. Your gf probably decided that's not what you want. If she's got close ties with her immediate family that's important and something you should cherish. There are a lot of people who would not care at all about their sibling coming back from being away.

pAnJayK

Switzerland56 Posts

January 17 2012 15:35 GMT

#54

Are you male or female OP?

KOFgokuon

United States14910 Posts

January 17 2012 15:44 GMT

#55

I'm mainly amused that you're being the girl in the relationship
Should she have discussed with you? yes. Should you talk to her about this afterwards? yes. Should you make a bigger deal about it than that? no

Charger

United States2405 Posts

January 17 2012 16:21 GMT

#56

Dude it's her sister. In the grand scheme of things you are nothing compared to family, especially after only a year.

bebe01

Korea (South)512 Posts

January 17 2012 16:28 GMT

#57

No offense you sound like a girl. My girlfriend is the one who has to remind me dates and get mad when i forget. Relax..

xSixGeneralHan

United States528 Posts

January 17 2012 16:36 GMT

#58

I wouldn't be mad at my GF, she's been with her sister way longer than you and sometimes family obligations just push the BF to the side. I've dealt with it with my GF of 4.5 years. And it's never an issue, just be understanding!

Nizzy

United States839 Posts

January 17 2012 16:37 GMT

#59

So wait, you're mad that she stayed with her sister over you?

Sounds like a have a prime opportunity to game it up all night or hang out with some friends. Not sure I understand the problem here. -_-a