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Hey guys, here's my latest article found on my blog at: http://thehonestlifeblog.wordpress.com/2012/09/04/death-is-coming-stop-running/ If you like it, please come to the site, like/follow/comment, and share it with your friends. Thanks!
I’ve had my dog Samantha for 14 years now. Since she was 11 she’s had non-cancerous tumors sprout on her head and her stomach. Since then she’s progressively gotten worse, and worse. Now at the age of 14, she’s almost completely deaf, becoming senile, and losing the ability to walk without assistance.
I’m no stranger to death. At the age of eleven I lost the three remaining grandparents I had in a 13 month period. While that was extremely tough, I was too young to really understand what was truly happening around me. I didn’t really comprehend the fact that I had just lost every connection I had to the “old ways” (so to speak) of my family. It’s only now, many years later, that the idea of death has started to scare me.
I came to the conclusion the other day that Sammy is coming to her last days. She’s been sick for 3 years, she’s clearly in pain, and when I come home to visit, she can barely recognize me anymore. At first I was absolutely destroyed. I grew up with her. She was there my entire life protecting me when I needed her, and now she’s slowly but surely leaving me. But after awhile, I realized that if dying will end her pain and suffering, then maybe it’s a good thing.
Death is a natural part of life, and nothing we do or say will ever change that. My therapist told me that when his father died, it was the roughest time of his life. But in his faith there is a tradition when it comes to losing a loved one: you accept the fact that they’re gone, you mourn and cry and grieve for their loss, and then you move on.
When I say move on, I don’t mean to say that you need to forget they ever existed. I’m saying that you need to move on from the grief and the sorrow and remember the beautiful times that you shared with them; whether it’s your father, your dog, a best friend, or your grandmother.
Death is a horribly beautiful thing. But we should never forget the ones that we’ve lost. I’ll never forget Sammy. She was my family and I loved her more than anything. And when her time comes, I will cry, I will mourn, and then I will move on and remember the memories that we had together.
Love the people in your life to the fullest and make sure to tell them you love them as often as possible because you never know when you won’t get the chance again.
With ALL of MY love,
Jack Harrison http://thehonestlifeblog.wordpress.com
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On September 04 2012 13:10 OptronX wrote:
Love the people in your life to the fullest and make sure to tell them you love them as often as possible because you never know when you won’t get the chance again.
I've never understood this. Once someone's dead, they're dead. Why would I regret not telling someone I loved them? They're dead now, they don't care any more how much I told them. I can see saying, "spend as much time as you can with the people you love, because you might not have the opportunity later". I can understand if you've always been a jerk to them, and never once showed them any compassion but you secretly loved them a lot. But otherwise, this statement makes no sense to me.
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On September 04 2012 13:20 Fumanchu wrote:Show nested quote +On September 04 2012 13:10 OptronX wrote:
Love the people in your life to the fullest and make sure to tell them you love them as often as possible because you never know when you won’t get the chance again.
I've never understood this. Once someone's dead, they're dead. Why would I regret not telling someone I loved them? They're dead now, they don't care any more how much I told them. I can see saying, "spend as much time as you can with the people you love, because you might not have the opportunity later". I can understand if you've always been a jerk to them, and never once showed them any compassion but you secretly loved them a lot. But otherwise, this statement makes no sense to me. It's a way to show them your respect.
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On September 04 2012 13:20 Fumanchu wrote:Show nested quote +On September 04 2012 13:10 OptronX wrote:
Love the people in your life to the fullest and make sure to tell them you love them as often as possible because you never know when you won’t get the chance again.
I've never understood this. Once someone's dead, they're dead. Why would I regret not telling someone I loved them? They're dead now, they don't care any more how much I told them. I can see saying, "spend as much time as you can with the people you love, because you might not have the opportunity later". I can understand if you've always been a jerk to them, and never once showed them any compassion but you secretly loved them a lot. But otherwise, this statement makes no sense to me.
What I mean to say when I say, "Love the people in your life to the fullest and make sure to tell them you love them as often as possible because you never know when you won’t get the chance again" is that you need to make sure that they know. Often times people tend to regret things when it's too late. They regret not asking the beautiful girl out in math class, or they regret not telling their father that they loved him before he passed away.
Love is a beautiful thing. It's an amazing feeling knowing that someone close to you truly loves and cares about you. I just mean to say, make sure that the people you love know that you love them because you might regret it later. I know I regret not telling my grandparents I loved them when I was younger.
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On September 04 2012 13:20 Fumanchu wrote:Show nested quote +On September 04 2012 13:10 OptronX wrote:
Love the people in your life to the fullest and make sure to tell them you love them as often as possible because you never know when you won’t get the chance again.
I've never understood this. Once someone's dead, they're dead. Why would I regret not telling someone I loved them? They're dead now, they don't care any more how much I told them. I can see saying, "spend as much time as you can with the people you love, because you might not have the opportunity later". I can understand if you've always been a jerk to them, and never once showed them any compassion but you secretly loved them a lot. But otherwise, this statement makes no sense to me. To love them while you're both still alive. Sometimes people don't know you really care about them, and they feel the same way inside but were too afraid to show it.
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Well, death isnt that bad compared the life but its the transition that may be uncomfortable.
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Just keep in mind that your dog had a happy life thanks to you. That's what I dead when my cat started to have tumors. It helped a lot.
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IF you wanna learn a little bit more about death try this. It's a lecture series about death by Yale philosopher Shelly Kagan. Just some food for thought, I found it very stimulating.
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On September 04 2012 17:27 surfinbird1 wrote:IF you wanna learn a little bit more about death try this. It's a lecture series about death by Yale philosopher Shelly Kagan. Just some food for thought, I found it very stimulating.
Thank you, my friend. I'll definitely have to check this out. I appreciate it.
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Have you considered putting your dog down if she's suffering so much?
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On September 05 2012 00:51 obesechicken13 wrote: Have you considered putting your dog down if she's suffering so much?
That's one of the options that is on the table right now. But my sister and parents aren't as ready to let go as I am. Like you, I feel that if putting her to sleep will alleviate her of the pain, I'm ready to do that. They aren't ready for that just yet. In time, I hope they learn to see it that way.
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