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I just learned that one of my friend whom we used to be classmates years ago got sexually harassed today. Basically what happened was a dude who was on a bicycle somehow masturbated infront of her and quickly cycled away. And it was apparent that he had been reported a few times already but has yet to be caught.
Perhaps a thought that has left me thinking for a long time - what would you do if you were there to witness it? Let's put it into a more dramatic but perhaps possible scenario. You are on a bus and you spot a man molesting a girl sitting opposite you red-handed. What would be the correct response? I heard of such cases a few times and people who read or hear about the incidents commented on how people who were around and present during the ordeal did not stand up to take any action. Especially from a guy's point of view, what would be the correct action knowing that there could be dangers towards you as well?
I still recall a few years ago as a young boy still in high school being perplexed at such a situation that my sister told me. She was on the train home and throughout the journey and there was this man who was trying to take a peek up the skirts of two schoolgirls. She didn't notice it herself until when the next stopped arrived and the man dashed out. She mentioned about how cowardly the men around who perhaps knew of the situation were and how they never stood up to help them.
As I thought about the situation myself and how the unfortunate incident that happened to my friend, it reignited my thoughts again. Yet I am unable to find the right answer. What would be your first action? Shout at him? I mean if you were to reveal his deeds, he would definitely run away. Do you give chase? How do you even prove that he did it? Would you actually be willing to go through all that trouble just to chase someone down?
Personally for me, how I would react and what I would do in such a situation reflects to myself what kind of man I really am. And for me to totally pretend not to notice and to get off the bus when my stop arrives is completely beyond me and something I would regret not taking action against. Yet at the same time, the truth is that such things require a tremendous amount of courage.
That friend of mine reported it to the police and she was sent there to assist in the investigation. Unfortunately, they have not found him and he remains at large.
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I don't get why such a big deal is made out of a dude jacking off on the street. Yeah it sucks, he's an idiot and a pervert. But still, what's the big deal? Just label him as a crazy person and move on. If someone is physically touching you then that's different. But just some idiot naked on the street? Whatever, ignore it.
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On February 29 2012 23:00 solidbebe wrote: I don't get why such a big deal is made out of a dude jacking off on the street. Yeah it sucks, he's an idiot and a pervert. But still, what's the big deal? Just label him as a crazy person and move on. If someone is physically touching you then that's different. But just some idiot naked on the street? Whatever, ignore it.
she didn't really tell me more details but it was something like him walking up to her and jacking off to her.
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depends how old she is, anything over 16/17 and it should be disgusting but funny. anyone who can't get a laugh out of that is being crude, and needs a good flasher wankin his cucumber to wake them up. its bad in general, really bad in front of children. but to older people, its just funny.
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JMave, I don't think being subjected to public indecency is the same as watching child molestation.
I would be disgusted and get over the masturbation in about 5 minutes, because I've watched at least one pornographic video in my life.
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Ask victim if they need help: yes/no
yes -> try to help
no -> walk away and assume they're shooting a porno
no response -> assume they're enjoying it and it is not rape or harassment
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Can't we get the police to do a sketch of his face and hunt this guy down ?
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Well, I've seen a man hit a woman in public, if that bears any similarity.
As you know, JMave, in our country, people don't do shit to help others. It was at a bus stop, and they would only stare as I confronted the man alone. He hit his wife to the ground and continued to attack her. Out of instinct I was about to beat the living daylights out of him. The irony was that the woman stopped me by using herself as a human shield, telling me that her husband was a "loving man".
Fortunately I had my warrant card with me, and that scared the shit out of the guy. His wife refused to let me drag him to the station. If the victim doesn't want to make a complaint, what can we do? Nothing.
If we see someone being mistreated, whether molestation or whatnot, it is our moral duty to step in. I know that I wouldn't be able to sleep the night if I let something like that happen right before my eyes.
Basically, Singaporeans are a disgrace. We are an unbelievably selfish people (a good majority) who would rather turn a blind eye than to lend a helping hand.
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On February 29 2012 23:39 theBALLS wrote: Well, I've seen a man hit a woman in public, if that bears any similarity.
As you know, JMave, in our country, people don't do shit to help others. It was at a bus stop, and they would only stare as I confronted the man alone. He hit his wife to the ground and continued to attack her. Out of instinct I was about to beat the living daylights out of him. The irony was that the woman stopped me by using herself as a human shield, telling me that her husband was a "loving man".
Fortunately I had my warrant card with me, and that scared the shit out of the guy. His wife refused to let me drag him to the station. If the victim doesn't want to make a complaint, what can we do? Nothing.
If we see someone being mistreated, whether molestation or whatnot, it is our moral duty to step in. I know that I wouldn't be able to sleep the night if I let something like that happen right before my eyes.
Basically, Singaporeans are a disgrace. We are an unbelievably selfish people (a good majority) who would rather turn a blind eye than to lend a helping hand.
that's really true. and standing up will usually be you standing alone.
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Canada5565 Posts
I don't think that molestation and public masturbation are similar enough to be used analogously like that. Furthermore, the idea that jacking off in front of someone should be categorized as sexual harassment is representative of how repressed and prudish Western culture is (but OP's from Singapore so that doesn't matter t_t).
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As the gentleman that I am if I caught someone masturbating outside like that I would help him finish and get him on his way to wherever he was going.
When a man needs to fap, it's an emergency to not take lightly.
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The guy was jacking off while riding a bike wtf? That's gotta be some porno shooting ahahaha
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I always masturbate in public, I love the fresh wind in my crotch.
Seriously though, I think that public masturbation is not the same as harassing someone. Altough it may not be appropriate content for people under a certain age.
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If it happened (the masturbation thing) in a bus I was in, I'd speak up, but if it happened out in the street while I was passing I'd probably just keep walking. Maybe if it was a man being violent to a woman I'd be willing to throw my own day away but other than that I guess I just can't be assed/too chicken shit to get involved.
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A dude jacking off on a bicycle? I'd be more tempted to take a picture with my smartphone than anything.
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Damn, idk. The part about OP's sister seeing it happening on a public transport is kind of messed up (by that I mean balls to the walls fucked up) I don't know how I would have reacted had I been around during this kind of situation, but previously I have found myself in a situation where I was at a bar and a guy was getting extremely violent (verbally abusive to the staff and very much intoxicated)
I let the situation kind of work itself out until he hit one of the bartenders (who happened to be a friend of mine, and a female) I went ape shit on this guy, grabbed him by the neck and threw him to the ground whereupon he was leaped on by four other people and he was kicked and hit then picked up and thrown out of the bar. He actually tried to come back into the bar like twenty minutes later and was arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct and spent the night in jail.
If I actually saw someone being molested and/or assaulted I would like to think that I would intervene, but you never know until you're in a situation like that :/ I know it's difficult to cope with the feelings of helplessness but all you can really do is be resolved to do something about it if you happen upon it I guess.
Crazy story, but public masturbation is an entirely different subject than molestation, it's not like they can MAKE you look at them wanking their dick at you, they can surprise you with it but looking away is easy and takes half a second. Crazy bastards do it for kicks, and the pervs do it because they are deranged and can't get off any other way...
Long story short, if I see a guy (or girl for that matter) masturbating in public, I will probably just ignore it and/or stay and watch (depending on whether or not its a woman, and you can accuse me of dealing in double standards all you like, but one is vulgar and disgusting to me and the other is art and very appealing).
Tl;DR More women need to masturbate in public, hell I might even let them molest me on a public transport if I'm in the right mood!
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Snap his shit up and kick him off his bike. make sure the girl was all right and see if she wanted to phone the police. The end.
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If I was the girl? He's a freak, hope they catch him, but just... ignore him ultimately.
If I was her friend and I saw it happening? Yeah, you can bet I'd be knocking some heads. I am NOT a violent person, but this is the kind of thing that makes me snap. I wouldn't kill him, but let's just say he wouldn't be doing so well. Fucker.
EDIT: If I was the girl and I was AWESOME, I'd knock some heads there too :D She should do that.
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If I were to witness a man masturbating to a female passenger ... it depends how long it lasts and how visibly distressed the victim appears. These factors would help me think past the initial "what the ****?!" and help me decide whether to shout at him to stop. No physical force - I would never risk injury to deal with exhibitionism.
I would report the incident to the police in the next few hours, after wondering whether to leave it up to the other witnesses.
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