|
On November 12 2011 19:47 DNB wrote:Show nested quote +On November 12 2011 19:44 Piste wrote: what?? koreans seems to take it slow. i wonder how often koreans gets sex then.. Koreans don't have sex — They are actually descendants of mega fighter crabs, thus they lay eggs instead. Any resemblance to the human race is purely coincidental. This is racist and so wrong... Just because they are descendants of mega fighter crabs and lay eggs doesn't mean they don't have sex for the fertilization, do your research.
|
1. Kissing her was not the wrong move. 2. Your reaction to her reaction to the kiss was the wrong move and the wrong reaction. 3. Perhaps she holds a view that foreigners kiss -> sex every time. This could be what made her nervous, considering your roommate was still there. 4. Always try to make sure you're alone for your first kiss. That way if shit hits the fan, you can at least handle it without anyone around. 5. She still likes you. Move past your mistake and start a few steps back from where you think you are.
|
Sounds like your roommate being there was the most important reason for such reaction. Seek complete privacy next time. Him being asleep or not, she would see this situation as public, not private.
|
On November 12 2011 18:12 night terrors wrote:
The last few weeks I've been talking with a Korean girl. We're both students, although in different classes, and she comes almost daily to my room, where she hangs out with her girlfriend and my roomate; I strongly suspect this is, at least in part, because she is somewhat interested in me. Anyhow, we kinda hit it off and we've flirted a lot. You know, yeah, the usual, I'm pretty sure im not reading this the wrong way. I've hanged out with her and her friends and they also seemed to think that we've got something going on.
Last night she came, with my room mate and the other girl I mentioned, at two A.M. after going clubbing for a bit, and asked me to go to another room with them for some drinking rounds. Long story short we found ourselves at 5 A.M. in my room, her friends left (after a lot of Korean gossiping that I think had to do with some 'tension' between her and me), and my roomate is cruising in deep sleep now. Knowing that she had chosen to stay, and that she came at 2 A.M. to drag me elsewhere, and that we had been flirtatious for two weeks, and that she repeatedly told me that she liked me on QQ, I decided to pull her close and kiss her.
Wrong move. I was met with a pair of cold lips and a complete desire to ignore that this had just happened. I mean, she acted like it really hadn't happened, all the while acting flirtatious and what not. So I'm getting mind fucked at that point, completely at a loss at what is going on, and I ask her what is up. She tells me, in no particular order that: My roomate is there, that in Korea you "can't do that", that it was too sudden, that she isn't sure. I, being a bit drunk, and actually a bit pissed off that this is happening start telling her that I don't think its fair to act in such an unambigous manner and then bail out and that well, it is my problem, but that I'd like to know where she stands on this whole thing; I finish with a literal "this is bullshit", which is OK since her english is poor (we talk in chinese). Please understand that for me its natural to assume that a girl is intersted when she spends so much time around, flirting, and comes to my room at late hours to drag me for some drinks.
So I just say "fuck this" and ask her to leave the room, thinking that well, this is it. Well, wrong again. I wake up today to find her in the room, again. Now my mind is really breaking into little pieces, and to add insult to injury I'm hungover and really god damn tired. I was pissed off and just ignored her, told her I was sorry for being a bit of a dick (although I think being upset was justified). Next thing I know there are three more korean girls in my room and I think that the issue has been raised between them. I just wouldnt show up at some one's room after the very akward moment of "making the move" and getting rejected. On either side, really. If she wasn't into me I really don't get why she'd come, and I certainly wouldnt seek her out. Now I think she's confused (and upset) as to why I'm pissed off, which is even more confusing. It's like the ball is back in my court, when I was pretty convinced that wasn't the case anymore.
The trouble is, and this is the real trouble, that I actually like this girl. I mean, I like her because she is kind, funny, cute, if a bit naive, and because im intrigued by her.
Really, what is going on? The behavior the Korean girl exhibited is common for girls. Just continue, don't make any stupid staff and you will reap the results (profit).
|
Yep. I did apologize twice. I wasn't proud of taking it the way I did. Even if she was flirting and what not she was in all her right to change her mind, and my reaction was pretty dickish. The reason I was/am confused is that she showed up again this morning... Otherwise I would have thought it to be the end of it.. I certainly didn't want to pursue anything else, for I thought she probably felt creeped out as it was.
|
On November 12 2011 21:21 King.Crimson wrote: Well you're definitely right about one thing OP, you don't get it. So many things gone wrong there i don't even know where to begin. I suggest you start reading up on Pick Up material. Real Social Dynamics is a solid place to start. Invest a couple of years into this and that convo u just had will be a cakewalk to plow through.
OP is already way better off than you are because he doesn't need the pickup material to get close to a woman without her calling cops. Imo hes fine but you better keep reading because you definitely need help bro.
|
And OP, you dont need to be manly and cocky in this story to sound cool and carefree. We know you care so just use 'utterly confused' and 'smitten emotionally on the verge of breaking down' rather than 'told bitch to gtfo' and 'unforgivable'.
|
I know your in college and everything, but a good tip is also to kiss a girl you really like not for the first time at 5AM drunk with a passed out friend nearby. If it is just some random girl you wanna have sex with its fine.
|
Koreans girls are a strange sub-species of an alien life form called 'women'. Wiki says their behavior is eratic, cock-tease worthy and also that they want relationships to move slow to 10000000000mph in the space of 3 months.
Do what will make you happy...you wanna be with her do it....she'll drive you fucking nuts but guess they're worth it....
|
On November 12 2011 22:40 night terrors wrote: Yep. I did apologize twice. I wasn't proud of taking it the way I did. Even if she was flirting and what not she was in all her right to change her mind, and my reaction was pretty dickish. The reason I was/am confused is that she showed up again this morning... Otherwise I would have thought it to be the end of it.. I certainly didn't want to pursue anything else, for I thought she probably felt creeped out as it was.
Your handling it fine then : )
You don't need TL to give you love advice, just try and be reasonable (yes thats meant to sound easier than it really is).
|
Dude, I think she likes your roommate.
|
On November 12 2011 22:49 discodancer wrote:Show nested quote +On November 12 2011 21:21 King.Crimson wrote: Well you're definitely right about one thing OP, you don't get it. So many things gone wrong there i don't even know where to begin. I suggest you start reading up on Pick Up material. Real Social Dynamics is a solid place to start. Invest a couple of years into this and that convo u just had will be a cakewalk to plow through. OP is already way better off than you are because he doesn't need the pickup material to get close to a woman without her calling cops. Imo hes fine but you better keep reading because you definitely need help bro.
What's with the hostile attitude broski? I gave him a harsh criticism because he clearly appears to be a newbie in this and then gave him a genuine source of knowledge on how to improve himself in this aspect.
You act based on your skewed opinion that one must not learn how to attract and deal with women on a superior level, that you should just use what feels natural. This is fine. 90% of the mediocres in this world think like this. I merely gave him a pathway to another alternative.
And you're right about one thing. A lot of the shit i've done with and to some girls, if u would have done the same thing to them, they would have called the cops on you :-) if you frame it right though, they will love you for it.
Cheers
|
United States22883 Posts
Do you really think she came into your room while you were sleeping just because she's confused?
Check your headset, man.
|
GL in your endeavor getting the korean girl ^_^
|
|
you really fucked up big time. you'll never get a date or a girl ever again and you'll turn old and scaly and into a bug just like franz kafka
|
Korean girls are a lot friendlier than most girls when they perceive you as a friend... Not unusual for them to randomly cook you dinner, spend a lot of time together etc smile laugh while still being friends. I think you're just horrible at reading girls and situations and have no idea what you're talking about
|
On November 12 2011 19:47 DNB wrote:Show nested quote +On November 12 2011 19:44 Piste wrote: what?? koreans seems to take it slow. i wonder how often koreans gets sex then.. Koreans don't have sex — They are actually descendants of mega fighter crabs, thus they lay eggs instead. Any resemblance to the human race is purely coincidental.
Dear sir, you shed the truth on this topic!
On a more relevant note, OP, you seem to handle the situation quite well. I'd advise to keep seeing her if you're still interested. Perhaps she wants to take it real slow.
|
She likes you. She wasn't completely comfortable to go to the next level in that particular setting. You reacted harshly. imo She STILL likes you, and probably realizes how her actions from the previous night provoked you to react the way you did, that's why she came back.
No other reason to come back: your intentions are surely clear, and she obviously wants to play her part in the story, but she's unsure of what exactly is the right way. I'm guessing she's a bit shy and/or inexperienced and that you'll need to take the foot off the gas a little and be patient with her.
|
I don't think you misread the signals, you just didn't analyze the situation. It was late, you were drunk, and you kissed her, what does she expect that the situations means -> dude is looking to score tonight. This was the first move you made on her, so she just expects that you want to git-n-go. Your action was poorly timed given that you had a sleeping roommate in the room, she could read that as kind of trashy. She said no, and you went batshit.
You manned up and apologized, and now you just have to learn from your mistake. Or you could just roll with it and pull Mani's underwear idea, I don't see a negative outcome coming from it.
|
|
|
|