EPTFor my first thread ever on TL, I want to create a guide for all the new folks who are trying to understand the TL forums.
I’ve been lurking for a few days now, so I pretty much know the lay of the land. And I just want to say that the elitism of the older TL generation is appalling!
Just because I didn’t play your precious Brood War, doesn’t mean I don’t understand RTS. I’ve watched enough TotalBiscuit to understand the ins and outs of the game. I won a bunch of WC3 free-for-alls, and I win a bunch of free-for-alls in SC2. If FFA had a ladder, I’d probably be 4k+ masters. So don’t f***ing push me and my 4 post-count aside as a noob, cause I’ll go 1on1 with you in an eight player FFA and wipe that shit eating grin right off your face (I’m talking to you LiquidTyler).
So fellow New Generation TL’s (New-gen’s), I’ve come to give you warnings, tips, and advice for navigating these forums:
Warning number 1: avoid the noob called “Chill.” He is the biggest troll of the all! I know he looks like a cute 10-year-old girl, but he’s really a jack-an-ape in disguise! He has no idea what the f*** he’s talking about, and he’s somehow hacked TL so that he can ban accounts! Yesterday, I had to change IP addresses 3 times cause he kept ban-hacking me. Stay away from this noob at all costs! (Chill New-gen threat level: code red)
Warning number 2: use one of your secondary accounts to flame LiquidNazgul. Don’t worry, I didn’t put it together either, but it turns out that the “L” in TL stands for Liquid, and this Nazgul character is somehow affiliated. Two days ago, I made the mistake of using my main account (I-Luv-ThE-CocKhoRsE) to flame that nerd, and he mother f***ing banned it! 4 posts down the drain! So be sure to make a side account to call him a Frodo-banging butt goblin. (Nazgul New-gen threat level: mild creamy-orange).
Tip number 1: Don’t play Brood War. Lemme give some constructive criticism of BW: the game sucks. Any game without colossi is stupid and imbalanced. Also, I tried to spread my creep using queens and hatcheries and the game bugged out or something cause the creep did jack s***. So retarded LOLZ. Also, mass arbiter is so f***ing OP and one day I will get my revenge on Nony – that rat bastard.
Tip number 2: Flame iNcontrol, and all of StateoftheGame for that matter. They respond! And it makes me feel special. Also WTF! They f***ing criticized ogsMC? Are you f***ing kidding me? There is such a huge skill gap between MC and iNcontrol that he shouldn’t be saying s***. So, even though he’s way better than me, I’m going to ironically criticize him for saying that s***. Because dammit I’m entitled to voice me opinion! And don’t f***ing voice your opinions of my opinions. I don’t want to hear it.
Advice number 1: Find and love CombatEx. The man is a hero. He bashed that noob Chill in BW. I didn’t get to watch the games, but Combat told me all about it. Also, he’s one of the only players that understands the importance of psychological warfare. Blizzard gave us in game chat for a reason people! And its not for “gg” LOLZ.
Advice number 2: If you are trying to become a progamer (like me), don’t buy into this whole “Koreans are better/practice better/whatever” bulls***. It’s complete crap. My little cousin is half-Korean and I f***ing crushed that noob like 12 times in a row. It was so awesome. I four-gated him every game. And he was all like “ahhh how do you make drones.” And I was all like “you f***ing suck you little b****.” And he was all crying and s***. Yeah so, Koreans kinda blow at this game.
So there you have a pretty comprehensive guide to the TL forums. Use it wisely.
P.S. If you are an elitist BW-loving Old-gen, I don’t wanna read any of your stupid negative posts. I’m entitled to say what I want, so STFU.
P.P.S. @LiquidTyler: rematch bo5 noob?
Beef Noodles
