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Limerick DB

Forum Index > General Forum
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1 2 3 4 Next All
Xeofreestyler
Profile Blog Joined June 2005
Belgium6787 Posts
February 23 2008 12:21 GMT
#1
Behold all you fans of dirty and not-so dirty limericks

http://limerickdb.com/

Set up by the owner of xkcd.com
There's some pretty good ones!

A preoccupied vegan named Hugh
picked up the wrong sandwich to chew.
He took a big bite
before spitting, in fright,
"OMG, WTF, BBQ!"

There was a young sailor from Brighton,
Who said to his girl, "You're a tight one."
She replied, "Bless my soul,
You're in the wrong hole;
There's plenty of room in the right one."

etc.
Writers go for it! (Are there any, besides defenestrate?)
Graphics
Aepplet
Profile Joined December 2003
Sweden2908 Posts
February 23 2008 12:27 GMT
#2
There once was a man named Bertold
Who drank beer when the weather grew cold
As he reached for his cup...
"NEEEEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!!!"
Oh, snap! You just got limerickrolled!

hahaha, limerickrolled! that's brilliant!
Narrator
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
United States868 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-02-23 21:31:49
February 23 2008 21:31 GMT
#3
I found out about this when the owner of xkcd put it on his blog. This is one of my favorites

If you catch a Chinchilla in Chile
And cut off its beard, willy-nilly
You can honestly say
That you have just made
A Chilean Chinchilla's chin chilly
SiZ.FaNtAsY
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Korea (South)1497 Posts
February 23 2008 21:46 GMT
#4
On February 23 2008 21:27 Aepplet wrote:
Show nested quote +
There once was a man named Bertold
Who drank beer when the weather grew cold
As he reached for his cup...
"NEEEEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!!!"
Oh, snap! You just got limerickrolled!

hahaha, limerickrolled! that's brilliant!

<3
Karma is a bitch
XCetron
Profile Joined November 2006
5226 Posts
February 23 2008 22:01 GMT
#5
good stuff
defenestrate
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
United States579 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-02-24 06:09:26
February 24 2008 05:28 GMT
#6
I can't compete with the better stuff on that site, but here goes:

On D&D

A young dungeon master named Dink
Had trouble with holding his drink,
And while taking a piss,
Rolled a critical miss,
Thus voiding right into the sink.


On economics

While some might enjoy reading Hume,
IS-LM curves spell my doom.
At the mention of Keynes,
I will shit in my Hanes
(or maybe my Fruit of the Loom).
We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges.
ieatkids5
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
United States4628 Posts
February 24 2008 06:33 GMT
#7
On February 23 2008 21:27 Aepplet wrote:
Show nested quote +
There once was a man named Bertold
Who drank beer when the weather grew cold
As he reached for his cup...
"NEEEEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!!!"
Oh, snap! You just got limerickrolled!

hahaha, limerickrolled! that's brilliant!

wow that was brilliant
genius
Energies
Profile Blog Joined September 2003
Australia3225 Posts
February 24 2008 09:15 GMT
#8
Haha..

There once was a buggy AI
Who decided her subject should die.
When the plot was uncovered,
The subjected discovered
That sadly the cake was a lie.

& my favorite.

There once was a small juicy orange,
...fuck.
"Everybody wanna be a bodybuilder but dont nobody wanna lift no heavy ass weight" - Ronnie Coleman.
InfeSteD
Profile Blog Joined December 2006
United States4658 Posts
February 24 2008 10:08 GMT
#9
I suck at writing this, but nice stuff Xeofreestyler , defenestrate, energies
w/e
LTT
Profile Blog Joined March 2003
Shakuras1095 Posts
February 24 2008 10:22 GMT
#10
This pair will be harder to get if they drift apart on the top 150.

#12 + (215) - [X]
There once was a gal from Peru
whose limericks stopped on line two.
#31 + (213) - [X]
There once was a man from Verdun
Moletrap
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States1297 Posts
February 24 2008 10:29 GMT
#11
Several years ago I went to an "open house" at Humboldt State and watched a sample lecture on "The Sociobiology of the Pronghorned Antelope."

It was actually fascinating, and I happened to be very into limericks at the time, and wrote:

There exists an antelope species
There are horns that are pronged on these beasties
All that they do is mate
Eat, war, and defacate
The mothers have to eat their young's fesces


Yes... when they are young, their mothers have to lick their butts to clean them up.
aka Moletrap
Energies
Profile Blog Joined September 2003
Australia3225 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-02-24 10:56:50
February 24 2008 10:55 GMT
#12
On February 24 2008 19:08 InfesTeD]i[ wrote:
I suck at writing this, but nice stuff Xeofreestyler , defenestrate, energies


Just copy pasted that stuff, here is one I did.

I know its not really a limerick by definition, and I have to apologies upfront for how bad this will be =/.


There once was a website called TeamLiquid dot net.
Whos patrons, often used the site as an outlet.
With users like Charlie, Strafe and Dronebabo
rpf, Stimey and the Romanians too.
You could be sure to have a good time, without a Salvia cigarette.
"Everybody wanna be a bodybuilder but dont nobody wanna lift no heavy ass weight" - Ronnie Coleman.
Slayer91
Profile Joined February 2006
Ireland23448 Posts
February 24 2008 11:13 GMT
#13
There once was a man from Rathmines
Who wrote limericks with only two lines
aka Teutonica
defenestrate
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
United States579 Posts
February 24 2008 17:41 GMT
#14
In regard to the Proleague Grand Finals:

A fellow named RowdierBob
Had sworn to stick cocks in his gob
If Froz beat Jaedong Lee.
Predicting this wrongly,
Bob started a stickier job.
We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges.
qrs
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States3637 Posts
February 25 2008 14:54 GMT
#15
Some pretty good limericks on that site.
Here's another nice one: http://www.oedilf.com. Stands for the Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form.
'As per the American Heart Association, the beat of the Bee Gees song "Stayin' Alive" provides an ideal rhythm in terms of beats per minute to use for hands-only CPR. One can also hum Queen's "Another One Bites The Dust".' —Wikipedia
Zherak
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Norway256 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-02-25 22:44:16
February 25 2008 21:58 GMT
#16
Being inspired by that site leads nowhere good:


I once knew a girl, rather vile -
She thought regular sex lacked real style,
I pulled out of her slowly,
And she began to blow me,
Then swallowed it down with a smile.


There was a poor geezer named Clyde,
Who had grown rather tired of his bride,
He hooked up with a cheap whore,
(The only one he could pay for) -
Now his penis has withered and died.
The bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes...
Zherak
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
Norway256 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-02 00:41:23
March 02 2008 00:38 GMT
#17
We need to:

a) Write StarCraft themed limericks
b) Vote them to the top

I struggle with the rhymes, but here's one to kick it off:

There was once a Zealot from Aiur,
Who was dropped on a Tank to draw fire,
He was instantly killed,
But his goal was fulfilled,
Now he's the Dragoon they require.
The bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes...
sith
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United States2474 Posts
March 02 2008 00:47 GMT
#18
On March 02 2008 09:38 Zherak wrote:
We need to:

a) Write StarCraft themed limericks
b) Vote them to the top

I struggle with the rhymes, but here's one to kick it off:

There was once a Zealot from Aiur,
Who was dropped on a Tank to draw fire,
He was instantly killed,
But his goal was fulfilled,
Now he's the Dragoon they require.


You are the fucking limerick king.
Deleted User 31996
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
843 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-03-02 01:09:11
March 02 2008 01:07 GMT
#19
There was a young player called flash
who macroed gols in a dash
they came and they saw
they conquered some more
and now Terran have a new catch


A player named stork
who looks like a dork
played a game against flash
lost in a fashion that was rash
now he is waiting for another match

inspired by zherak now

There exists a reaver with no name
who has 4 workers inside his brain (ta MDT)
workers scatter like flies,
the player cries while the reaver dies
and the shuttle returns to main

lol
iG.Aura
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
Poland686 Posts
March 02 2008 01:08 GMT
#20
On March 02 2008 09:38 Zherak wrote:
We need to:

a) Write StarCraft themed limericks
b) Vote them to the top

I struggle with the rhymes, but here's one to kick it off:

There was once a Zealot from Aiur,
Who was dropped on a Tank to draw fire,
He was instantly killed,
But his goal was fulfilled,
Now he's the Dragoon they require.


woowwww thats a really nice one man
:-)
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