EPTDating: How's your luck? - Page 781
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46635 Posts
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levelping
Singapore759 Posts
You just don't really need 2 hours to do that (although well 2 hours is a lot less crazy than 5 hours). We get it that sex is an important function of a relationship. But so are other things too, and if you're spending the time you have together mostly on sex, then you're missing out on the other things that you guys can be doing. Worse still, I think, is that if there is a strong emphasis on sexual behavior in the relationship, things are kinda going to go south really quickly if later on in life either person's libido starts to die off. | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46635 Posts
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Red_Dragon
Croatia2862 Posts
Sometimes it is hard, recently I told my feelings to one girl that I knew for 3 years, we were good friends, we did a lot of stuff together, etc. She broke up with her boyfriend, but lady luck was not in my favor, she ended up with some other dude, and anyway the relationship did not last long. Even though it was painful (especially when someone tells you you are the type of the person she never meet, but we cannot be together *only* because we work together), I sucked it up, and tried to work even more on myself. In these situations you (have to) understand that the life's journey is not about somebody else, first find yourself, and work on yourself. Sometimes life will throw a lot of sand in your eyes, but do not be discouraged, just go back to evolution chamber. Life is a beauty, embrace it : ) | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
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evilfatsh1t
Australia8940 Posts
On January 09 2016 21:14 LemOn wrote: That's mostly BS btw from her, couples meet at work a pretty high% of the time, so she was just letting you down easy and isn't interested in you romantically- women will break their rules if they are really into you, and working together is not that big of an issue. lol thats just not true at all i know a lot of both women and men that have that rule, and no they arent breaking it even if they are 'really into you'. me personally am the same, i never even attempt to get romantically close to a coworker. cant get 'really into' someone when youre not even 'into' them to begin with | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46635 Posts
On January 09 2016 22:54 evilfatsh1t wrote: lol thats just not true at all i know a lot of both women and men that have that rule, and no they arent breaking it even if they are 'really into you'. me personally am the same, i never even attempt to get romantically close to a coworker. cant get 'really into' someone when youre not even 'into' them to begin with I agree that some men and women choose not to get romantically involved with coworkers, not because they're not attracted to colleagues, but because it could jeopardize their job and make the workplace environment more awkward, if something potentially goes wrong. When considering who to "seriously" date, there are other external factors (like if there might be conflicts with careers) that many people will take into account. It's unfortunate for people who miss out, but it's not particularly surprising. | ||
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GoTuNk!
Chile4591 Posts
On January 09 2016 22:54 evilfatsh1t wrote: lol thats just not true at all i know a lot of both women and men that have that rule, and no they arent breaking it even if they are 'really into you'. me personally am the same, i never even attempt to get romantically close to a coworker. cant get 'really into' someone when youre not even 'into' them to begin with I'm with lemon here. If she is sufficiently attracted to you she'll forego all her "rules". | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46635 Posts
On January 10 2016 02:02 LemOn wrote: love conquers all. And work is nothing close to stuff like religion etc. While "love conquers all" is obviously overly idealistic (and so not really worth addressing directly), work can be just as important (or moreso) to some people than religion, especially if the person isn't particularly religious. All of this is anecdotal, and depends on the priorities of the individual. There are plenty of people who would never date or marry someone outside of their own religion or race, and there are plenty of people who don't like to "shit where they eat" (mix their dating scene with their established work environment). You can't make sweeping generalizations like "What the girl said to you is bullshit because no one would ever choose their work over dating". You may disagree with the girl's list of priorities, but that doesn't mean she's a liar about her preferences. | ||
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ticklishmusic
United States15977 Posts
Love can be powerful, but there are a million things that can wear it down. Distance, family, some other people, illness, etc. Storytime: Once I got dumped because the girl's pastor (Southern Baptist) told her I was bad for her soul or something since I was a kind of nebulous Christian. Of course, he also ended up cheating on his wife, so there was that. | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46635 Posts
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IgnE
United States7684 Posts
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GoTuNk!
Chile4591 Posts
On January 10 2016 02:35 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: While "love conquers all" is obviously overly idealistic (and so not really worth addressing directly), work can be just as important (or moreso) to some people than religion, especially if the person isn't particularly religious. All of this is anecdotal, and depends on the priorities of the individual. There are plenty of people who would never date or marry someone outside of their own religion or race, and there are plenty of people who don't like to "shit where they eat" (mix their dating scene with their established work environment). You can't make sweeping generalizations like "What the girl said to you is bullshit because no one would ever choose their work over dating". You may disagree with the girl's list of priorities, but that doesn't mean she's a liar about her preferences. Imagine you were Brad Pitt in his thirties. What do you think she would do? | ||
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RuskiPanda
United States2906 Posts
Walked around a bit and checked out some shops while waiting for seating for food+drinks (popular japanese place). Tried to show I was interested and we did get good physical rapport-sitting close, touching arms/legs. Probably had a window for a kiss if I was more forward but it was pretty packed (yea yea excuses). Lost a lot of that tension towards the end as we were both pretty tired after ~4 hrs so ended with a hug. Said she had fun so I'll probably try to set up another day with hopefully no flake. In retrospect should've done that before we left but yea. | ||
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DarkPlasmaBall
United States46635 Posts
On January 10 2016 09:41 GoTuNk! wrote: Imagine you were Brad Pitt in his thirties. What do you think she would do? Believe it or not, it's not the case that 100% of all women would throw away their careers and other plans to date Brad Pitt. Heck, just look at Shania Twain... She literally wrote a song about how simply being Brad Pitt don't impress (her) much. | ||
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levelping
Singapore759 Posts
On January 10 2016 02:35 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: While "love conquers all" is obviously overly idealistic (and so not really worth addressing directly), work can be just as important (or moreso) to some people than religion, especially if the person isn't particularly religious. All of this is anecdotal, and depends on the priorities of the individual. There are plenty of people who would never date or marry someone outside of their own religion or race, and there are plenty of people who don't like to "shit where they eat" (mix their dating scene with their established work environment). You can't make sweeping generalizations like "What the girl said to you is bullshit because no one would ever choose their work over dating". You may disagree with the girl's list of priorities, but that doesn't mean she's a liar about her preferences. Actually, I can say that as a guy who has turned down a girl at work, the idea that love conquers all is a little simplistic. I personally put a lot of importance in being professional at work with clients and colleagues, and so avoid relationships because they make it very difficult to keep things professional. The girl I turned down was really pretty, into star wars, and a pole dancer, but as much as I found her very attractive I knew that it would compromise my ability to work with her professionally. We're still good friends, but we both realise in hindsight that it was a good thing that we didn't try dating. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
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Impervious
Canada4222 Posts
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