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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On August 08 2015 04:13 LemOn wrote:
And go back to watching TI5
Yeah shopping with grills is a bad idea I think. Unless you are shopping for lingerie with them, lewd things can happen in the changing booths then I think.
What's the point of watching TI5 when secret is out? God damn why do they draft so shitty lineups for 5v5 fights..?
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Just came back from a date with a girl who seemed genuinely interested in my shit, she was politically savvy and otherwise cared about social issues and could entertain some pretty abstract discussions. It was good to finally meet someone with some substance. Surprisingly, she's a lawyer, which at first worried me because I know lawyers and meh. So we'll have to see. Cool girl though, she plays some videogames, hates social media and most importantly, ignores her phone during a date.
10/10 looking forward to the next. My previous 8-10 dates with other girls were fucking horrible.
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On August 08 2015 11:43 Djzapz wrote: Just came back from a date with a girl who seemed genuinely interested in my shit, she was politically savvy and otherwise cared about social issues and could entertain some pretty abstract discussions. It was good to finally meet someone with some substance. Surprisingly, she's a lawyer, which at first worried me because I know lawyers and meh. So we'll have to see. Cool girl though, she plays some videogames, hates social media and most importantly, ignores her phone during a date.
10/10 looking forward to the next. My previous 8-10 dates with other girls were fucking horrible.
Sounds great overall! Try not to let previous lawyers create a negative stereotype about her
The "ignoring her phone during a date" thing is key there. Respectful + Interested, sounds like
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On August 08 2015 11:43 Djzapz wrote: Just came back from a date with a girl who seemed genuinely interested in my shit, she was politically savvy and otherwise cared about social issues and could entertain some pretty abstract discussions. It was good to finally meet someone with some substance. Surprisingly, she's a lawyer, which at first worried me because I know lawyers and meh. So we'll have to see. Cool girl though, she plays some videogames, hates social media and most importantly, ignores her phone during a date.
10/10 looking forward to the next. My previous 8-10 dates with other girls were fucking horrible.
Sounds too good to be true. Have you checked her basement for bodies?
J/K, Sounds awesome, gratz and gl.
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On August 08 2015 11:43 Djzapz wrote:ignores her phone during a date.
She sounds nice! Deeper discussions are fun as fuck, however I barely met any girl in Sweden who can hold a discussion about politics without getting emotionally invested.
The "ignoring her phone during a date" thing is key there. Respectful + Interested, sounds like 
It's like you guys are used to girls checking their phones? Wtf? What kind of girl watches her phone during a date? I'd leave in the middle of the date without saying a word to her if the girl I dated started fumbling with her phone instead of focusing on the date.
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On August 08 2015 17:24 bloodwhore~ wrote: It's like you guys are used to girls checking their phones? Wtf? What kind of girl watches her phone during a date? I'd leave in the middle of the date without saying a word to her if the girl I dated started fumbling with her phone instead of focusing on the date. I wouldn't say I'm used to it but I've had it happen a few times. Sometimes they'd just glance at the phone which is fine if it happens only one or two times (something important might be happening) but I've had one who'd casually respond to the texts she received. Maybe she thought I was boring and she wanted to let me know or something. While I didn't just leave, I expedited the process from that point on.
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On August 08 2015 17:24 bloodwhore~ wrote:She sounds nice! Deeper discussions are fun as fuck, however I barely met any girl in Sweden who can hold a discussion about politics without getting emotionally invested. Show nested quote +The "ignoring her phone during a date" thing is key there. Respectful + Interested, sounds like  It's like you guys are used to girls checking their phones? Wtf? What kind of girl watches her phone during a date? I'd leave in the middle of the date without saying a word to her if the girl I dated started fumbling with her phone instead of focusing on the date.
A lot of people are pretty dependent on their smart phones, since they can have to-the-second updates on the world around them. Given that you can do pretty much anything and everything from your mobile device nowadays, I acknowledge a considerable amount of restraint by those who keep the phone away during a date (or just a general evening out with friends), rather than texting or Facebooking or TLing all evening
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On August 08 2015 23:12 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:A lot of people are pretty dependent on their smart phones, since they can have to-the-second updates on the world around them. Given that you can do pretty much anything and everything from your mobile device nowadays, I acknowledge a considerable amount of restraint by those who keep the phone away during a date (or just a general evening out with friends), rather than texting or Facebooking or TLing all evening
Sure, however it's a huge red flag and definitely a deal breaker for me. Anyone who can't put their phone on a date for a few hours has a serious problem.
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On August 09 2015 00:09 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On August 08 2015 23:12 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:A lot of people are pretty dependent on their smart phones, since they can have to-the-second updates on the world around them. Given that you can do pretty much anything and everything from your mobile device nowadays, I acknowledge a considerable amount of restraint by those who keep the phone away during a date (or just a general evening out with friends), rather than texting or Facebooking or TLing all evening Sure, however it's a huge red flag and definitely a deal breaker for me. Anyone who can't put their phone on a date for a few hours has a serious problem.
Exactly. That's why we all said it was important and great that she wasn't on her phone while out with Djzapz
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On August 09 2015 00:46 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Exactly. That's why we all said it was important and great that she wasn't on her phone while out with Djzapz 
I just got the impression that it happens to you all the time and that it isn't weird for girls to do it. It's like, "She didn't murder a small child during our date." and you're like "That's fantastic!", to me.
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On August 09 2015 00:58 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On August 09 2015 00:46 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:Exactly. That's why we all said it was important and great that she wasn't on her phone while out with Djzapz  I just got the impression that it happens to you all the time and that it isn't weird for girls to do it. It's like, "She didn't murder a small child during our date." and you're like "That's fantastic!", to me.
Hahahaha fair enough.
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On August 08 2015 04:21 bloodwhore~ wrote: Yeah shopping with grills is a bad idea I think. Unless you are shopping for lingerie with them, lewd things can happen in the changing booths then I think.
No offence, but you're such a virgin bloodwhore . Even if it doesn't really apply to my situation, but you don't go shopping with you girlfriend / hopefully future girlfriend (just) for sex. Helping her buying new bras sure has it benefits, but mainly you should consider this:
Usually your girlfriend will care about your perception of her looks. By going shopping with her, you can not only help her be more secure with her look, but also steer things in the proper direction. You get a sense of what she pays attention to when choosing clothes. These are the things you should look out for to make her a compliment on if she changes something about it. Its the old "did you change something about your hair?"-thing. She prefers clothes that emphasise the waist and wears something that does exactly that at some point, maybe she tightened up her blouse? Compliment her on it. Same goes for favourite colour/combination of colours, stuff that emphasises a special part of her body/clothes etc.. You will really brighten her up by doing that and let hr feel that you pay attention to her efforts. You can even do it with women that you don't hit on/aren't together with, as it will really cheer them up, as long as it stays reasonable of course. You also get a good idea about what you can buy her as a present.
In general, at least if you move in together, it will happen that you go shopping together. I agree that I usually wouldn't go shopping with my partner on a regular basis, especially if its some sort of activity she used to do with her friends, but everyone should be able to go shopping at some point with his/her partner, if it means something to them.
On August 07 2015 20:01 Acrofales wrote: Why on earth are you going on that "date"? Tell her that it sounds great to meet her friends, but you'll be in the bar/elsewhere whilera they do their girly stuff, and meet them afterwards.
If you know you won't like the activity, bow out gracefully before you get irritated and annoyed. My gf at least prefers I don't come shopping over me being añ impatient sarcastic asshole while shopping, which is what I inevitably become afer 3 different clothes shops.
B..b..but the mistress said so... I don't want to upset her or else I get the hose again .
You're right, usually I wouldn't take part in this if there is a way to avoid it, but this time I made an exception for a few reasons. First of all, despite not being my thing I've went shopping multiple times with various females for different reasons, and are capable of staying focused and kind of motivated, so basically it was a good way to meet/impress her friends. Partying in general is a pretty awful activity to really getting to know someone since you are occupied with partying/should dodge serious stuff that could kill the mood. And since her best friend was coming, it seemed like a good move. And since I don't really go to clubs, the early part actually could have been the more enjoyable/less suffering for me. It was also a chance to see her behaviour in a non-dating situation.
So much for the plan, the reality was slightly different though... I almost underestimated my powers. First of all, the shopping trip was a great success. I managed to not getting grumpy, always gave good input and more importantly, was able to be occupied by something else/somewhere else whenever my hones input might not have been appreciated. But 6 ladies on a shopping trip with me being the only men among them is something I wont repeat ever again. My brain still feels completely exhausted, my skin and hands look fabulous though. Not worth it, but fabulous nonetheless. At least the mall had air conditioning as it was freaking hot that day. And their friends were better then expected for the most part. Her best friend is actually pretty interesting, just like another one, 2 of them are ok I guess, only one was just a pain in the ass. Boring as fuck and also the reason we had to go through a goddamn perfumery that I still got a headache from. The clubbing was not really my thing as expected, but I managed to get through it and whenever we changed the location we had quite some fun on the way. Overall mission more then accomplished. I am pretty sure none of her friends hates me, and her best friend definitely likes me.
And I learned some useful stuff: She seems not do drink much, even though she could have been holding back because of me, but didn't seem like it. She definitely likes dancing, not necessarily club-dancing but in general. So I look into improving my skills on that again. She's good at singing. Nothing I can work with here, but still good to know since she enjoys it. I got a good sense about her fashion and I highly appreciate it. Even if have to admit that she dresses way to classy to date a guy that almost exclusively wears clothes that are to big. military trousers and mostly shirts that are 10+ years old ^^. Since she told me we would go clubbing and I should dress up I did and I managed to surprise her in a really good way, but this wont become a regular thing. She doesn't use much make-up, which is a very good sign for me. Girls that use a excessive amount of it have some serious problems with themselves I believe. Plus it would be awkward waking up each morning, having a person next to you that looks completely different to the one you said good night to. She seems more into "nerd"-stuff than I thought in the beginning. Another good thing even though I am already sure that gaming for the most part is something she has absolutely no connection to. She is still a bit insecure about what I mend with taking things slow I think. I got on really good terms with her best friend fast and later on spend a bit to much time with her best friend I guess. Her mood dropped noticeable, but got better real fast as soon as I noticed and started to focus on her again.
Bonus points: I stayed at her place overnight, don't worry, I didn't sleep on the couch this time. Towards the end of our tour, she got really touchy and it progressively increased. All the dancing and stuff made her horny as hell, and when we got to bed she was extremely clingy. Basically, now I know how all the girls feel, when they just want to cuddle/sleep and they have their boyfriend with a raging erection next to them. I actually found it really amusing.
And I finally got used to 2 things about her that felt somehow strange in the beginning. The first one would been her voice. It is not annoying or anything, quite the opposite. Its extremely smooth and always very clear, like she would constantly narrate something. Up until this date, I thought she would force it but now I know that it is just her voice/way of speaking and suddenly it was al good. Second one, her eyes. Also usually not a problem, their pretty awesome and I have a thing for special eyes. She's the first person I met that has yellow eyes. Like legit yellow, not this brown-blue mix, but more like clear amber. I didn't know that this was even a thing until I met her. She also has this dark ring around her iris which looking in her eyes very intense. Again, not a bad thing, but initially it made me feel really strange. In general I seem to get more comfortable with her and warming up, start paying more attention to her body etc., things start to get rollin for me I hope. 
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On August 09 2015 02:57 waffelz wrote: Bonus points: I stayed at her place overnight, don't worry, I didn't sleep on the couch this time. Towards the end of our tour, she got really touchy and it progressively increased. All the dancing and stuff made her horny as hell, and when we got to bed she was extremely clingy. Basically, now I know how all the girls feel, when they just want to cuddle/sleep and they have their boyfriend with a raging erection next to them. I actually found it really amusing.
I know that feel. I used to have a girl come visit me in the morning, which was great to wake up to, but I also wanted to sleep...
I love these nonstandard dates I've been setting up lately. Beats coffee/food every time. I live right between the city and the countryside, so the girl who I was previously talking with lives in the former and hasn't seen much of the latter, and I decided to show her around the area, get to know her a bit better in the process. Also works out because my commute to work is about 5-10 minutes long, and I've been wanting to drive someplace else for some variety.
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No offence, but you're such a virgin bloodwhore
Ouch! Shots fired haha jk. I was kinda kidding with what I said but I do think shopping with females can be a pain. It probably depends which girl you may be shopping with, but my sister can easily walk around for hours just looking at things.
To be fair, I don't really care for girls who can't dress themselves. Sure if they want some input for what I think is looks good but honestly don't think they should need my help.
Unless you have lived with a girl for a while you won't know when they are wearing something new, I don't know what kind of girls you know but the ones that I know have a ton of clothes. Even I try not to wear the same clothes twice. I'd be damned if I ever wore a graphic t-shirt when unless I was training too.
but also steer things in the proper direction almost exclusively wears clothes that are to big
I'm not sure I'd trust your advice either if I were her .
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On August 09 2015 04:39 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +but also steer things in the proper direction almost exclusively wears clothes that are to big
I'm not sure I'd trust your advice either if I were her  .
Touché :D But I am just fucking cheap and don't like to show off my statue for some reason. And with "for some reason" I mean not looking like some brute. Previously: long hair and chinbeard. Now: very short beard, but also extremely short hair. Combined with the military trousers, both doesn't go well with my body I feel. And I just love my military trousers to much. The only time I like form-fitting clothes is with formal-shirts and trousers that fit that. Not so keen on jackets, they make me look like a bouncer. She insisted on adding a vest to my outfit and I swear, it made me look like I want to resemble a mobster from the 1920s. Just shave me clean/add a fitting moustache, a hat and a coat to wear on my shoulders and the look would have been perfect.
But you are kind of right. She was genuinely surprised by my input, as well that I actually got an outfit that fit the evening. Maybe inviting me to the shopping trip was her plan B, in case I showed up like usual. Another good reason to go shopping with your sisters/female freinds some times 
EDIT: trust is also a word that leaves some room for interpretation :D
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it is completely baffling to me that you had a horny girl in your bed and instead of having sex you just laid there amused
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On August 09 2015 07:33 IgnE wrote: it is completely baffling to me that you had a horny girl in your bed and instead of having sex you just laid there amused
This. She prolly felt terribly insulted aswell.
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I may have also teased her about it
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On August 09 2015 07:33 IgnE wrote: it is completely baffling to me that you had a horny girl in your bed and instead of having sex you just laid there amused
"Babe one sec, I gotta blog about this. You know TL? They know you."
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On August 09 2015 08:56 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: "Babe one sec, I gotta blog about this. You know TL? They know you." It was yesterday. Actualy 2 days ago in my timezone to be precice and it is still bloodwhores erection we are cheering for. And just for your information, my phrasing was "Mom, get the camera!".
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