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For those of you who somehow remember my last blog from about a month ago, here's a recap worded as quickly as possible: + Show Spoiler +>Friends with girl since we were 15
>we're now 19
>in this time she's never had a crush let alone a boyfriend
>she has home issues, I'm like a brother
>not interested in dating her at all
>she's not interested in dating me either.
>about a month or 2 ago
>she gets crush on a guy
>they hit it off
>I get jealous, ask for advice
"should I say nothing, or ask her out on a date"
-end previous blog-
and the result of that: I did nothing, the guy she was into still has feelings for his ex, she remains single, we remain friends, she has no idea I developed feelings for her.
p.s. my feelings gradually faded as I realized I was jealous another guy might steal my friend, not that I was crushing on said friend. I also realized that I'm the worst kind of person, and am doing my best to fix that.
Begin Current Blog!:
I'm like, a 6/10 on a good day, I'm skinny as a rake, only barely 6 foot tall (wearing shoes), so white I'm almost translucent, and my hair is.. well, it looks fine but it's the hair of a beta virgin, not the hair of Chad Thundercock, alpha pimp extraordinary.
I'm a uni student, I work in a grocery store part time, I play games for more hours a day than Flash and Mvp combined.
so.. where to begin..
I work an 8 hour shift every Saturday, and every second Sunday, and at least once a week I get subway for lunch, I'm almost always served by a really cute girl, the kind whose pretty without makeup, I'm polite to her every day, like I am to everyone, ask her how she's doing, tell her thanks for the sub have a nice day etc. eventually we're on a first name basis, and I start getting 14 dollar meals for 7 dollars, eventually I find out she's a student at my university, a year older than I am.
About 6 months ago I'm in her store with my workmate, and she asks about "A guy who works in your grocery store, in the produce department (I work in the perishables department)" tells us she thinks he's super cute, we ask her to describe him, she gives pretty much my exact description. but me, being the socially retarded moron I am, assume she means someone who is not-me. My friend and I buy our subs, and discuss on our lunch break who the guy she's into might be "all the guys in produce have short blond hair, who the hell could it be?" forget about it after that day and never bring it up again.
As the university semester goes into full swing, she quits working Saturdays, and only works a morning shift on Sundays, so I don't see her on my lunch breaks anymore, and I have to pay 14 god-damned dollars for a foot-long sub, cookies, and iced tea. basically I slowly forget she exists, only reminded by the pain I feel every time I check my wallet after lunch.
Flash forward to this Sunday just gone, I go into subway, one of the girls asks me what I want, and the girl who gives me half price subs comes out of the back, says that she'll serve me, and we make smalltalk about uni while she makes my sub. It's been a good 5-6 months since I've seen her, but she remembers exactly what I have on my sub.
She says she hasn't seen me around uni, and I notice a single strand of spaghetti leaking out of her sleeve, but choose not to point it out, because I'm a gentleman and don't want to embarrass her. I reply "Yeah it's odd we don't run into each other, I bump into people I know all the time, what days are you there?". She tells me, and asks when I'm there, I reply in kind. by now, there's about half a meals worth of spaghetti dripping out of her sleeve and into my sub, I do my best to ignore it.
--optional side story-- + Show Spoiler +I'm a guy who doesn't get scared. I can watch any horror movie you like, I've been skydiving, bungee jumping, on multiple roller coasters, and in a million and one haunted houses. I've watched a horror movie in a country town surrounded by woodland, with a group of ~10 friends, to have the power cut itself 10 minutes after the movie ended, at 3am, and been the only person brave enough to go downstairs and find a torch, without my heart-rate going over that of a fit guy going for a morning jog
Then she asks me the scariest question I've ever heard in my life, "Do you want to go with me to <our universities tavern> for dinner?" my heart skipped 9 beats, then went into overdrive. A customer behind me gasped in shock, her co-workers stared at her in horror, enough spaghetti slipped out of her sleeves to feed a hungry Italian family for weeks, the room went silent, the only sound was the gentle pitter-patter of meatballs falling from her sleeve, to the counter, to the floor.*
Then autopilot took over "Yeah sure, give me your number and I'll send you a buzz."
The widest grin I've ever seen appeared on her face, and she did a tiny fist pump and exclaimed "yes!"**
she sold me my sub, and wrote her number on the cookie-bag, and I went back to work and bragged to my co-workers that subway-girl gave me a half price meal and gave me her number. I assume she spent the rest of her afternoon cleaning up spaghetti and meatballs.
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this girl has balls, man. In my 19 years of existence I've had the courage to ask out one girl+ Show Spoiler + over windows live messenger, kill me.
So, Team Liquid, I haven't been on a real date since high school, and I'll be damned if I know how to behave on a first date, with a person I know so little about, especially when she asked me on the date.
So how does this work? Should I offer to drive her, Do I meet her there at a set time? Do I pay the bill, or do we split it? Do I wear the dress-code appropriate to the university tavern, or do I wear the dress-code appropriate for the first date?
Basically, any advice on how to behave on a date will be appreciated.
*The spaghetti is a lie, everything else was added for embellishment. Some of the things I described may have happened but I was too damned shocked to notice.
**I swear I thought I saw her do a tiny fistbump and say yes, but theres a more-than-likely chance that I imagined it.
TL;DR: girl asked me on date. give me advice please
Oh, and in the 1/100'000'000 chance, Subway Girl, you find and read this blog. text me, so I can explain I'm not some weirdo creeper!
 
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Only barely 6 foot tall. Give me a break. Do anything.
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Just be the guy that she liked. Dont try to change it up. This doesnt mean that you shouldnt show a new side of you.
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United States18840 Posts
Here's my one piece of advice; if you get away from terms like "beta" and "alpha", you'll be a lot better off.
As for your worries, go casual but neat, it's a tavern for crying out loud. Considering that it was her who asked you to go, you silently paying the bill would look very odd, so why not offer to split via conversation? Getting payment etiquette out into the open with a convo as to how unusual it is for a woman to ask you out would break the ice and clear up any confusion.
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Northern Ireland22208 Posts
Glad the spaghetti stuff wasn't true lol
Good job op, update us on how it goes
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The girl asked you out man, it's in the bag! She's clearly into you so essentially all you need to do now is not fuck up. The answer to your question depends on your circumstances.
How far is the tavern? Is there a chance that she lives close? And since your going to the university tavern, I'd simply dress trendy but casual. Just look good.
There's really no pros or cons to meeting her there or picking her up the way I see it. Just do whatever makes sense and that is convenient for the both of you.
Also, since she asked you out, she should pay. (Ok, maybe not.) I usually offer to pay in a situation like this, if she wants to share the bill, object at first but if she keeps pressing it, go ahead and share it.
During the date, just follow the basics. Keep the conversation going, give proper replies instead of simply answering ''uh-uh'' if she asks a question. The more you speak, the more you share, the more there is to discuss.
Godspeed.
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On August 27 2013 03:10 Spicy_Curry wrote:
Just be the guy that she liked. Dont try to change it up. This doesnt mean that you shouldnt show a new side of you.
honest and to the point, thanks!
On August 27 2013 03:11 ahswtini wrote:
Glad the spaghetti stuff wasn't true lol
Good job op, update us on how it goes
The spaghetti stuff is a "meme" of sorts I included in an attempt to make the story slightly less boring :3
On August 27 2013 03:10 farvacola wrote:
Here's my one piece of advice; if you get away from terms like "beta" and "alpha", you'll be a lot better off.
As for your worries, go casual but neat, it's a tavern for crying out loud. Considering that it was her who asked you to go, you silently paying the bill would look very odd, so why not offer to split via conversation? Getting payment etiquette out into the open with a convo as to how unusual it is for a woman to ask you out would break the ice and clear up any confusion.
Thanks for the advice on the dress and the bill. I don't truly believe the "Beta and Alpha" stuff, I only included it to make the Chad Thundercock joke ^_^
On August 27 2013 03:08 hp.Shell wrote:
Only barely 6 foot tall. Give me a break. Do anything.
to be honest, anyone below 6 foot 5 inches is a manlet and should give up all hope of romance, girls only go for guys minimum 6'6"
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Tavern clothes and date clothes aren't that different - just dress how you would normally dress if you went out for dinner. If I were you I would offer to pay, women like that, but she might say that she wants to split the bill because she's independent - if she offers that then go with it.
General advice: she's already asked you out, so you know she likes you and that should give you confidence. Just be yourself, ask about her, try to find things you might have in common - you both go to university so that's a good starting point, talk about some courses you have taken, etc.
Good luck.
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On August 27 2013 03:13 NonFactor wrote:
The girl asked you out man, it's in the bag! She's clearly into you so essentially all you need to do now is not fuck up. The answer to your question depends on your circumstances.
How far is the tavern? Is there a chance that she lives close? And since your going to the university tavern, I'd simply dress trendy but casual. Just look good.
There's really no pros or cons to meeting her there or picking her up the way I see it. Just do whatever makes sense and that is convenient for the both of you.
Also, since she asked you out, she should pay. (Ok, maybe not.) I usually offer to pay in a situation like this, if she wants to share the bill, object at first but if she keeps pressing it, go ahead and share it.
During the date, just follow the basics. Keep the conversation going, give proper replies instead of simply answering ''uh-uh'' if she asks a question. The more you speak, the more you share, the more there is to discuss.
Godspeed.
"all you need to do now is not fuck up." the title of my next blog is likely going to be "I HAD ONE JOB"
seriously though, thanks for the advice
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On August 27 2013 03:18 Salv wrote:
Tavern clothes and date clothes aren't that different - just dress how you would normally dress if you went out for dinner. If I were you I would offer to pay, women like that, but she might say that she wants to split the bill because she's independent - if she offers that then go with it.
General advice: she's already asked you out, so you know she likes you and that should give you confidence. Just be yourself, ask about her, try to find things you might have in common - you both go to university so that's a good starting point, talk about some courses you have taken, etc.
Good luck.
gracias, will keep that in mind
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Im 5'10' and I can tell you that you are highly highly mistaken sir.
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People say try to find stuff in common, I say repeat in your head 10 times that you go there to have fun and that you will have fun and that you will give her a great time. You can mix this with some standard boring stuff but remember you want to have and give her a good time.
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Girl asks you out on a date? Keeper. Confident = sexy. Just be you. Only advice you need.
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it's at a bar and you're in college dude. nice jeans, nice polo or something, nothing crazy, pick up the tab and enjoy.
fyi, there are plenty of women who will approach you in bars, or ask you out. still better to take the initiative yourself
On August 27 2013 03:25 Bigtony wrote:
Girl asks you out on a date? Keeper. Confident = sexy. Just be you. Only advice you need.
yup this 100%
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On August 27 2013 03:24 RQShatter wrote:
Im 5'10' and I can tell you that you are highly highly mistaken sir.
posts made by me regarding the desire of women, in relation to the height of men, may or may not have been blatant lies and/or a poor attempt at humor
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On August 27 2013 03:29 QuanticHawk wrote:it's at a bar and you're in college dude. nice jeans, nice polo or something, nothing crazy, pick up the tab and enjoy. fyi, there are plenty of women who will approach you in bars, or ask you out. still better to take the initiative yourself Show nested quote +On August 27 2013 03:25 Bigtony wrote:
Girl asks you out on a date? Keeper. Confident = sexy. Just be you. Only advice you need. yup this 100%
It doesn't feel like a real girl blog unless you bash the writer somehow hawk 
On August 27 2013 03:24 aTnClouD wrote:
People say try to find stuff in common, I say repeat in your head 10 times that you go there to have fun and that you will have fun and that you will give her a great time. You can mix this with some standard boring stuff but remember you want to have and give her a good time.
cool thanks
On August 27 2013 03:25 Bigtony wrote:
Girl asks you out on a date? Keeper. Confident = sexy. Just be you. Only advice you need.
see above response~~
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hahaha. I only bash the op if the op is being a creep or sexist. You're not!
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On August 27 2013 03:38 QuanticHawk wrote:
hahaha. I only bash the op if the op is being a creep or sexist. You're not!
Damn, I'll have to try harder next time \:
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Considering that she was forward enough to ask you out, let me direct you to a brilliant video that will provide a proper introduction to dating. It's called, "Elementary Dating."
In all seriousness though, don't discuss money, politics, etc. on the first date. The point of a date is to get to know the other person. Obviously both of you like each other, but this is your chance to see if there's something that goes beyond just mutual physical attraction. Be yourself, be confident about yourself and don't focus on yourself - self-entitled jerks who look good going into the first date and then spend the rest of the date talking about themselves in a friendly, casual sort of way rarely move past that first date. A first date's like playing hot potato - both sides want the other side to talk. ^_^
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I'm assuming you haven't been on many dates in your life, judging by how you flirted with her for months and had to wait for her to ask you out.
Just be yourself. Don't create a version of yourself that doesn't exist. If you do, she will probably be disappointed in the future.
As far as conversations go, it really just depends on your personality as to what you'll end up talking about. Try to listen to her as much as you can, and give thoughtful responses. Be polite and for Flash's sake don't let it go to topics that are a "no-no" (think ex's, other girls that she can be jealous of, etc). Go at your own pace and don't jump to any conclusions about her.
Above advice in the thread is solid. Best of luck my friend.
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EPT
