I have to admit, I had a WTF! reaction to your post rather than the soulful longing and melancholy you were going for.

It's because you frame Starcraft like it's this dark ritual incompatible with any semblance of a normal life, with having friends and relationships, something to be kept hidden even from your closest friends. And again I have to say, WTF.

>At this point in my life, I'm not even a spectator anymore. Starcraft has left my life entirely ... and I'm fucking miserable.

I can't recommend going to a barcraft for this MLG this week strongly enough. GO. DO IT. You'll meet tons of happy fun people living their lives, a few who play seriously and hope to compete some day, some who just watch a tournament once awhile. But ALL delighted to spend a weekend with others enjoying something they love, without shame or hiding anything.

Harrad

1003 Posts

August 23 2012 18:01 GMT

#89

On August 24 2012 02:49 JackDT wrote:
I have to admit, I had a WTF! reaction to your post rather than the soulful longing and melancholy you were going for.

It's because you frame Starcraft like it's this dark ritual incompatible with any semblance of a normal life, with having friends and relationships, something to be kept hidden even from your closest friends. And again I have to say, WTF.

>At this point in my life, I'm not even a spectator anymore. Starcraft has left my life entirely ... and I'm fucking miserable.

I can't recommend going to a barcraft for this MLG this week strongly enough. GO. DO IT. You'll meet tons of happy fun people living their lives, a few who play seriously and hope to compete some day, some who just watch a tournament once awhile. But ALL delighted to spend a weekend with others enjoying something they love, without shame or hiding anything.

You have to admit that his way of engaging in starcraft (devoting himself completely to the dream) is pretty unique, and he did it when he was like ~16. If you had read and understood this blog you would have realised he wasnt some average joe who liked the game it was literally EVERYTHING for him. So I suggest you save your WTF for another day.

TheRealPaciFist

United States1049 Posts

August 23 2012 18:02 GMT

#90

On August 24 2012 02:49 JackDT wrote:
>At this point in my life, I'm not even a spectator anymore. Starcraft has left my life entirely ... and I'm fucking miserable.

I can't recommend going to a barcraft for this MLG this week strongly enough. GO. DO IT. You'll meet tons of happy fun people living their lives, a few who play seriously and hope to compete some day, some who just watch a tournament once awhile. But ALL delighted to spend a weekend with others enjoying something they love, without shame or hiding anything.

Or actually go to one of the MLG's in person sometime =)

Maybe you, pubbanana, have lost the dream and more importantly the pursuit of a dream. But maybe you can share the love of Starcraft with others, and while you reconnect yourself to this world through barcrafts or other social events, maybe you'll stumble across a new dream (anything from being a caster to being the sound guy for NASL, haha!).

Whatever you choose to do, good luck

fire_brand

Canada1123 Posts

August 23 2012 18:05 GMT

#91

Thanks, this was a great read.

The only thing I can offer you is that you're still young enough to find a new dream. And obviously you can conjure the passion and discipline to attain it. Find a new one, and shove it in the world's face so everyone knows it.

JackDT

724 Posts

August 23 2012 18:11 GMT

#92

On August 24 2012 03:01 Harrad wrote:

Show nested quote +

Point taken, though the WTF is largely about how he felt he couldn't even tell his friends what he was working so hard on, and had removed completely from his life the thing that he loved so much. Wear a brood war shirt out in public and when someone asks you about it, stop and connect with them, 'Yeah, I could have been a contender maybe...' with that wistful look in your eye.

I like the way the poster above put it: share the love with others, and you might stumble across a new dream.

Bajsgrodan

Afghanistan408 Posts

August 23 2012 18:15 GMT

#93

that feel...

CynicalToss

United Kingdom15 Posts

August 23 2012 18:27 GMT

#94

Great write-up, brilliant read after a bad day. Quite inspiring to actually do what I want to do rather than do what others believe is the normal thing to do.

Buddhist

United States658 Posts

August 23 2012 18:29 GMT

#95

When you tell people your goals, you gain some of the pleasure of actually achieving the goals. By keeping the goals all to yourself, you push yourself to only feel good once you've actually achieved the goal.

HankJDoomstorm

United States15 Posts

August 23 2012 18:29 GMT

#96

It's not too late to start playing again, man.

Intellectually I know I'll never be a progamer.
But in my heart I'll never let it go. I play every day and I eat better and I work out and everything good that I really care about I have because of Starcraft.

Even if it feels impossible, I promise it can all come back to you and it won't take long before it's easy again. I don't know your life, and maybe it's not what you want or what you need. But if you believe it is, just do it.