Yeah or you could just tell her you're not interested up front??? Honestly it will hurt her less to find out earlier... imagine if you were the one getting friendzoned-- better to know earlier right

what makes you think I didn't?

Lysenko

Iceland2128 Posts

April 28 2012 09:35 GMT

#22

On April 28 2012 18:28 UniversalSnip wrote:

Show nested quote +

what makes you think I didn't?

Wow, it took me a few minutes to follow the thread back to figure out what this digression was about.

Also, doesn't "Friendzone" sound like some kind of 90s teen pop band? If there's a take-away from this thread, it's how awesome that is.

To the OP. Assuming you're serious. Your friend can be gracious, friendly, and nevertheless ready to be very direct about lack of interest should an instance come up where it seems in doubt. There's a lot of overlap between what's acceptable between friends and romantic partners, and as long as she doesn't cross any lines, it doesn't necessarily have to be an issue.

Nikon

Bulgaria5710 Posts

April 28 2012 10:21 GMT

#23

Your friend can try momzoning her. You know "You remind me of when I did this with my mom", etc. etc. It should be very clear that he's not interested in her as a girlfriend.

Erasme

Bahamas15898 Posts

April 28 2012 11:11 GMT

#24

I usually want to stay out of trouble and just cut contact with the girl in question.
It saves a lot of time :o

Lysenko

Iceland2128 Posts

April 28 2012 11:29 GMT

#25

On April 28 2012 19:21 Nikon wrote:
Your friend can try momzoning her. You know "You remind me of when I did this with my mom", etc. etc. It should be very clear that he's not interested in her as a girlfriend.

That's a little subtle. I'm not sure everyone would take that as a brush-off.

Th1rdEye

United States1074 Posts

April 28 2012 12:01 GMT

#26

Eh, I hope it's not either of their FIRST dates ever with people....

Because if not, then this isn't even something to worry about. And, if your friend didn't see it until now..well, he must have his head in a book or something. I mean, who walks a girl to the bus stop or hangs out in halls and can't tell if someone is flirting with them?

And, also, if neither of you have actually heard from the girl in direct wording, how can you be sure? Because this seemed like a "surprise" for him. Maybe she is bored, lonely, or likes guy friends over girl friends?

Sajiki

Germany522 Posts

April 28 2012 12:17 GMT

#27

i guess if i would have read the flowcharts before i rated it, it wouldve been a 5 LOL

Mobius_1

United Kingdom2763 Posts

April 28 2012 12:19 GMT

#28

That is the most, shall we say, interesting vocabulary I've read in a Girl Blog discussion.

As for the discussion itself, I haven't anything to add to it, having never been in such a situation before. Obviously.

obesechicken13

United States10467 Posts

April 28 2012 14:24 GMT

#29

I can't find a solution to the problem but I can prove that finding such a solution would be NP hard. See the way the neurons are arranged is like some sort of graph with nodes and edges. Whatever answer your friend provides will remove some of the edges of said graph depending on what associations the girl has created in her brain with the words your friend says. Finding the shortest(or perhaps best) pathway in such a graph would then be like solving a known NP problem, the ham cycle problem. The translations to and from the ham cycle problem would take at least polynomial time.

You could use heuristics and apply the honesty theorem though for a good enough approximation: Given a bad situation with a girl, the girl would in the long run be happier knowing the truth than being led on for too long or being lied to. It's an approximation so I can't guarantee the success of this solution.

Can't say I've ever seen this solution play out though.

GoTuNk!

Chile4591 Posts

April 28 2012 14:51 GMT

#30

I think the solution is quite easy.
Tell him to put himself in the fucking friendzone again. Tell him to be very nice and caring with the girl. To talk a lot with girl, ask her about her problems, without ever touching her. Avoiding eye contact and an awakward body language should help aswell.

LaSt)ChAnCe

United States2179 Posts

April 28 2012 14:53 GMT

#31

Step 1: You make a cameo on the trip
Step 2: You take one for the team and kiss him passionately
Step 3: ?????
Step 4: Success.

Elegance

Canada917 Posts

April 28 2012 15:03 GMT

#32

On April 28 2012 23:53 LaSt)ChAnCe wrote:
Step 1: You make a cameo on the trip
Step 2: You take one for the team and kiss him passionately
Step 3: ?????
Step 4: Success.

Most viable solution right here

krndandaman

Mozambique16569 Posts

April 28 2012 15:24 GMT

#33

--- Nuked ---

Latrommi

United States222 Posts

April 28 2012 15:28 GMT

#34

Actually, instead of that you should try siszoning her. If he doesn't have a sister, "You're like the sister I never had", and if he has a sister, "I guess I have two sisters now", etc.

matiK23

United States963 Posts

April 28 2012 15:36 GMT

#35

I love you......................

...like a sister.

Cirqueenflex

499 Posts

April 28 2012 16:19 GMT

#36

On April 29 2012 00:24 krndandaman wrote:
if he has another girl he likes he should just mention her to 'Paula'.
ex. "hey... there's this girl I like from (blahblah make it obvious its not paula) and I want to maybe ask her out. Any ideas?"

exactly my thoughts. Show her what's up without hitting her in the face. Then there are 3 possible outcomes:
a) everything will go on as has been, and P.M + Paula will remain friends. If Paula was into P.M. and continues to wanting to be with him even though he made it absolutely clear that he is interested in girl number 2 (and thus not Paula) it is her own choice, thus P.M. will not be the bad guy (and no bad breakup). If Paula was not into P.M., nothing changes (except for the fact that she knows his secret crush on girl number 2).
b) she will confront him, P.M. will have to grow some balls and tell her that he likes Paula as a friend, but doesn't think they belong together (not enough synergy). This is ugly, but leaves P.M. with the best sleep at night.
c) she will make a retreat. P.M. will have lost Paula as a friend. This scenario is least likely, since P.M. did nothing to Paula directly. Plus, chicks dig dudes who are already taken (since they usually wont make a move on the girl, therefore making it a much safer friendship for the girl). As i said, most unlikely option.

The funny thing is, as long as P.M. doesn't throw the ball in Paulas court, all 3 possible outcomes are true at the same time.

UniversalSnip

9871 Posts

April 28 2012 16:38 GMT

#37

I'm inclined to think he should try daughterzoning her or perhaps dogzoning. "you're like a less important daughter to me" or "i have so much fun with you, just like when I'm playing with my dog."

obesechicken13

United States10467 Posts

April 28 2012 16:56 GMT

#38

On April 28 2012 23:51 GoTuNk! wrote:
I think the solution is quite easy.
Tell him to put himself in the fucking friendzone again. Tell him to be very nice and caring with the girl. To talk a lot with girl, ask her about her problems, without ever touching her. Avoiding eye contact and an awakward body language should help aswell.

Always works for me. Though this girl has the balls to ask your friend out and your friend won't even give her a chance?

deathly rat

United Kingdom911 Posts

April 28 2012 17:09 GMT

#39

Tell the girl you are a sexual deviant who likes freaky sex. This way she either doesn't see you as bf material, or you get some freaky sex.

mastergriggy

United States1312 Posts

April 28 2012 18:52 GMT

#40

The only time in my life this situation happened to me, I used the "let's just be friends line" and I promptly ended up losing her as a friend. I wouldn't suggest doing that lol. After that I would just address them as friend/you're a great friend/etc. to let them know that I am only looking for friendship with them. It's a lot easier after you are married though, I just point to my ring.